kiwithebard

[kiwithebard]

Husband has discovered you can mail Kraft singles so he sent these out

I made him write “do not eat” because they are not shelf stable. I also decided this was a him-project and if he gets arrested by the USPS Cheese Crimes Council I’m not part of it but if it goes over well I’ll jump in and claim partial credit.

Here is what he took to the post office:

They began arriving this week. Here is our thread with my MIL. (She’s Blue, my husband is Red)

She is amazing. I did not think she’d actually tape it to the Xmas card wall! (Later in Dec that whole wall will be covered in cards.) How long do we think that will last before their dog figures out how to get to it?

Cheese is so far a hit with everyone and has arrived safely at multiple houses. I take back all my criticism and I’m now claiming to be a full partner in Operation Hand-Krafted Card.

@laid-back-at-lunchtime’s card got commentary from the mail lady?! Very glad she found it funny and doesn’t hate us. I was actually kinda worried we were gonna ruin the postal services’ day so this made us very happy.

The last text is sending me. 😂

[kiwithebard]

#get rekt i guess [x]

[kiwithebard]

OFMD Season 2 + text posts

[kiwithebard]

my poor babygirls

[kiwithebard]

A Moose shed it’s antlers to loose some weight | source                         

[kiwithebard]

Keying/graffiti-ing someones car is old news now if someone cheats we go at their wardrobe with a seam ripper

yknow what? Fuck you *unstitches all your shirts and jeans*

[kiwithebard]

brazilian beaches: stairs

[kiwithebard]

The full Dragon series!! Each creature from a different biome… I had a lot of fun coming up with the different types of dragons and imagining what it would be like for these warriors to face each one. The fire dragon being particularly destructive. The night dragon near impossible to see coming in the dark. The ice dragons the size of mountains. The river dragon’s keen eyes. The sand dragon’s deadly poison. The mist dragons forcing the battle into the sky. The water dragon hiding in the deep. The garden dragon is chill though. Good lad.

Fire Dragon

Komodo

Mage / Staff

Night Dragon

Wolf

Samurai / Sword

Ice Dragon

Bearded

Viking / Axe

River Dragon

Crocodile

Thief / Dagger

Sand Dragon

Cobra

Archer / Bow

Mist Dragon

Eagle

Knight / Spear

Water Dragon

Eel

Sailor / Harpoon

Garden Dragon

Iguana

Healer / Potions

[kiwithebard]

[kiwithebard]

‘veelutions

(credited to my twitter)

[kiwithebard]

I want time to be quiet. I want a week where there’s nothing expected of me. I want some light snowfall. I want a home I can rearrange the furniture with every season. To bring friends over to be warmed by the fireplace. I want to paint the walls. I want to curl into you until I feel my hurt fall asleep. I want to pluck rosemary from the windowsill. I want to feel comfort again. I want so much space in my heart for the light to fill.

[kiwithebard]

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever + letterboxd reviews

[kiwithebard]

Superior writing advice:

Make your characters FREAKS. Make them DERANGED. Make people think ‘surely this one guy towards the back is normal’ only to reveal FUCK NO. The guy in the back exclusively collects clown paintings (paintings done by professional clowns) and has an irrational hatred of second floors.

[kiwithebard]

Stop killing the whales | source

[kiwithebard]

ATTENTION

The US government just killed Lezmond Mitchell, a Native American man.

It is against the law for the US Government to order the death of a tribal citizen without the approval of the corresponding sovereign Nation's approval. The Navajo Nation (to whom Mitchell belongs) actively campaigned against his execution. This is the first execution of a Native American by the occupying US government in modern times.

This is a Big Fucking Deal.

[kiwithebard]

Why have I never this story before?

File this under "brilliant but could have also gone horribly wrong.

Yeah, you shouldn't date your stalker. Ask the girl from You.

[kiwithebard]