kjt-blog

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oh, tanzania.

one day i will be able to digest everything i have seen here, the bad and the good.

one day i will be able to reconcile the fact that every single person i know back home is about 100 times richer than any tanzanian here, both in money and otherwise.

i hate the world so much sometimes it makes me weep.

why did i deserve to be given what i was given?

i don't want to play anymore.

i want to grow my own food, i want to live simply, i don't want any more creatures to hurt because of my own selfish needs. i don't want to be in a culture that seems hell-bent on fucking everyone else up for their own benefit.

i am no better than the child beggars on the street who scream after me, so why should i be able to do more than them? i shouldn't. 

i just want to scream at everyone i know back at school, and say "you're all so lucky! stop being petty! stop wasting what god has given you!" but i will just seem righteous  and full of it. so instead of externalizing the pain i have over america, i shall just lead by example, and hope that they follow.

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The desert is a surgeon cutting away the skin to expose what is underneath.

-Fremen Saying

(art: Neil McClements)

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fear is the mind-killer.

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i've been rung out of emotion for so long, i'm not quite sure how much else i can deal with this season.

i'll miss you both, grannybear and grandma betty jestin

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Do not let my fickle flesh go to waste As it keeps my heart and soul in its place And I will love with urgency but not with haste

Mumford & Sons, "Not with Haste"

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54 days.

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blade runner

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(by Gonzaga Manso)

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dear lord in heaven

if i stay here any longer 

i may surely blow everyone's brains up.

love,

kjt

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the many faces of johnny depp... thanks reddit

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aww

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Illus. by Artuš Scheiner for Under Command Of Magic by J. Š. Kubín (1920s)

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ugh, love this shit

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i hate when the moon of my life is gone from me