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[knox-carmody]

About the Muse + the Blog

Writer: Alex/Lex (she/her); 29; EST

Muse: Knox Samuel Carmody (he/him); 34; line-worker (ranch-hand, sometimes)

FC: Matthew Daddario

Associated Personal Blog: moonstonewrites.tumblr.com

Rules:

Will not write: smut (I will only do fade to black), rape/dubcon, incest/stepcest, extreme violence/gore, self-harm, daddy/mommy kinks, major age gaps.

Will not interact with krps, celebrity rps/celebrity muses.

Will not write with muns or muses under 25. Do not lie. I will block you.

Multi-shipping is accepted.

Will utilize trigger warnings and content warnings as follows: “trigger tw” and will tag for violence, blood, gore, abuse.

Aesthetic for Knox

Wind whistling in your ears, the clatter of a baseball bat on concrete, the heat of dogs at the foot of the bed, trucks with dents in the bed, hardhats flung on the floor, callused hands. 

General Summary

Caught in the middle, literally and figuratively. Second child of a dairy farmer and a waitress. What his family lacked in money they did not make up for in reputation either. His childhood was tumultuous, but he managed to keep himself out of trouble mostly. The same could not be said for Knox’s adulthood. It is difficult to hide from DNA and Knox is no exception.

Full Biography

TW: alcoholism, domestic violence, childhood abuse, murder, infant death

The family layout is oldest brother (Butch; deceased), Knox, and his little sister, Faye. As a kid he always wanted to be around his older brother and father on the family farm.

Dairy farming is hard, dirty work, and like so many family-owned farms across the country, the Carmody family struggled to stay afloat. The constant financial struggles took its toll on Knox’s father and his parents’ relationship. Knox’s father fell deep into the bottle during his early childhood and he never seemed to find his way out.

Some people are happy drunks, funny drunks, or sad drunks. His father was none of those. He was a mean drunk and all of his meanness came out at the sight of the wife and kids he could not provide for.

By the time Knox’s little sister began elementary school, the family started to sell off portions of the land to make ends meet. With every financial loss, the deeper his father fell and the meaner he became. Knox and his siblings learned to follow their mother’s example. They never asked for anymore than the little scraps Knox’s father gave, and they made do with skills outside of him.

For Knox’s mother, this was waitressing. Unfortunately, his father’s demons stole most of the money his mother earned. Knox and his siblings learned early on how to fend for themselves. They stole food from classmates’ lunchboxes, went “shopping” through the lost-and-found, and occasionally swiped things off front porches to eat or sell. 

Their mother, too worried about staying afloat and keeping Knox’s father occupied, never noticed whenever her children came home with belongings that were not bought by her. She just accepted their weak excuses because there was always a bigger fish to worry about in the pond.

Things came to a head when Knox was 12 years old. The family farm slowly bled out until it dried up. It was only by a stroke of luck that Knox’s mother managed to hide away enough money to afford the first month of rent and security deposit for a three bedroom double wide in the local trailer park.

Living in a small space was a hard adjustment, but the proximity to other homes meant there were more places to escape his father. Knox and his siblings, used to being teased and bullied at school, found it easier to fit in after the move. Knox and his brothers were hardly “popular” by any definition, but they made more friends and that was the beginning of their divide.

Butch, always following in their father’s footsteps, found kindred spirits among the troubled children of their hometown. Knox, always more quiet and observant, kept to the outskirts of social circles. He was friendly with many, but friends with a select few.

Instead, Knox focused on helping his mother keep afloat. His father’s drinking, now at its worst, meant more and more of his mother’s paychecks disappeared. It would have been easy to steal and cheat his way to little chunks of money. Knox, always observant, knew there were other family’s just as fractured as his own living in the trailer park. Families that did not have someone coherent enough to fix leaky faucets, shovel the walkway, or patch the roof. 

Knox’s father passed away unexpectedly from a stroke during his sophomore year of high school. Butch quickly filled the black hole his father left in the family. He was always in trouble, always being dragged off by cops, and always treating all of them like dirt. 

Knox spent the rest of his teenage years working odd jobs and dragging himself through school. His mother rarely asked for anything from her kids, but she wanted all of them to graduate high school. So, that was what Knox did. Then, against her wishes, he went straight to vocational school. 

He took to electrical work like a fish to water. His mother always wanted more for her children. She wanted all of them to have well-paying white collar careers, but with her oldest child racking up a steady record of petty crimes, she settled with her second becoming a blue collar worker. Just as long as he was honest about his work, and Knox always was.

The routine Knox established worked for him, but it was a routine. As more and more of his classmates graduated from university, less and less of them came home. His eyes slowly began to wander towards different horizons. 

It was at Butch’s funeral that Knox reconnected with an old friend, a quiet crush, named Nora. She was technically one of his brother’s flings in the past, but she was always Knox’s friend. 

Things developed slowly between them. They chatted regularly, then he went to visit her where she attended school at the time. They were always just friends until they became something more. 

For the first time in his life, Knox was in love, and like many young people in love he made a decision that others found crazy. When Nora dropped out of school to chase after her dream of being a horse trainer, Knox took on work as a lineman to travel the states with her. What sounded stupid to everyone else, clicked for him, and they were happy.

A few years into living on the road, Nora found out she was pregnant. He was shocked, but not terrified, never terrified. Fatherhood made sense to him. He had the perfect example of what not to be, but in the end it didn’t matter.

Death, much like chance, does not discriminate. While Nora compartmentalized the pain of their daughter’s death, Knox spiraled, and that was when the constant contracts and moves proved to be a mistake. As Nora threw herself into her work, and he was left to his own devices, it was all too easy to find a friend at the bottom of a bottle. 

The next couple of years were a whirlwind. Nora held onto him for as long as she could and that was three years. 

It took time for Knox to gather himself up to return to his hometown. He returned home a mess.

Drinking to take the edge off was a lot different than drowning in his grief. After struggling to keep down a job and burning one two many bridges, he went down to Florida to get sober once and for all. 

The heat and the sunshine did him a world of good. He’s returned home and some of those burned bridges are beginning to mend, but that’s still not the case for his heart.