krispyllamaruins

[krispyllamaruins]

if mario was trapped in a cave for generations he would gradually become pale and lose his eyes and start hunting for fish and centipedes by sonar but he wouldnt lose his overalls or hat

[krispyllamaruins]

can you paypal me one ancient rusting coin

[krispyllamaruins]

Haters

[krispyllamaruins]

has anyone seen my pile of two grains of rice

[krispyllamaruins]

[krispyllamaruins]

going "but idk lol" after my oracluar visions to absolve myself of fault just in case the war doesnt go how i said and our kingdom gets fucking sacked again

[krispyllamaruins]

this line delivery has lived in my head for 10 years

[krispyllamaruins]

i fell asleep to this and woke up wearing a striped nightgown and nightcap and my cat transformed into a candlestick

[krispyllamaruins]

i wish u could hold out ur hand to pigeons and they’d come sniff it like cats would & they’d go ooo rooo rorooo oo and let u pet them. alas bird flu

[krispyllamaruins]

not to be an american but like. air conditioning is the greatest invention of all time.

[krispyllamaruins]

the whole "lipstick on a pig" thing makes no sense because the second we gave a pig access to makeup she became god's cuntiest soldier

[krispyllamaruins]

comments are turned off on this and i know it was a bloodbath in there

[krispyllamaruins]

[staggering to my feet and wiping a single perfect drip of blood from my mouth] i have to get back on my bullshit. no matter the cost

[krispyllamaruins]

[krispyllamaruins]

Every morning in the torture dungeon, the torturer (love your job and you’ll never work a day in your life) goes around greeting his victims with, “wakey wakey begs and achey.”

[krispyllamaruins]

every time giorno opens his fucking mouth he says shit like this