krusty-cakes

[krusty-cakes]

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 The fact that the evidence in the impeachment trial needs trigger warnings is horrifying. The fact that the impeachment managers are providing them is beautiful.

[krusty-cakes]

me after 15 seconds of work: i just cant do this anymore

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The literal job of a bullet is to be fired

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The year is 2022. You’re driving home from work, wifey calls & asks you to get some diapers for the baby. You grab roses for her. Life’s good. She’s crying in the closet you forgot the diapers what’s she gonna do with roses idiot there’s shit everywhere this is why your parents never loved y

[krusty-cakes]

You really don’t have to forgive anyone for anything. Stay mad about shit that makes you mad.

[krusty-cakes]

For Christmas, I bought my wife a world map and gave her a dart. I told her to throw it and wherever it lands, we will go on vacation after this pandemic is over.

Turns out we are spending two weeks behind the fridge.

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that boy you just called a krusty krab? his name is patrick

[krusty-cakes]

babygirl you would not believe the amount of tabs i have open

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I’m watching my husband be psychologically abused by his ex(?) every day and there isn’t a damn fucking thing I can do.

My husband won’t listen to me that it’s happening, he refuses to see it for himself. He is still in love with the asshole and hoping to get back together (again). Two breakups aren’t enough?

I don’t know how much longer I can watch this happen....

[krusty-cakes]

Therapist: i want you to say something positive about urself

Me: i have eyes

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Me: I’m sorry

Someone: What are you sorry for?

Me:

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The average person is more generous than billionaires when you calculate generosity as a proportion of net worth

[krusty-cakes]

“If you’re not calling out your bigoted family you’re part of the problem” doesn’t apply to those who will literally be at risk of violence and abuse if they confront their family

We need to reassure those who physically can’t call their family out without dangerous consequences that they shouldn’t feel guilty for keeping themselves safe