kyloren-sithlord

[kyloren-sithlord]

Idk some trashy AU where Ben is a freeloading NEET who lives in Hux’s nice apartment and Hux..allows it??

[kyloren-sithlord]

I want to be back!

I have a tiny but of muse so come to discord and set up a new plot with me. Don't expect a lot, I might disappear again, but I've seen tlj so I'm kinda pumped. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

( I really want to get back into role playing bc I just saw tlj but uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh idk I'm terrible )

[kyloren-sithlord]

Hey

Since I’m never on here, I’m moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Rebagel if you’re open to Skype/Discord RP with folks you trust.

[kyloren-sithlord]

"Kylo Ren is a pussy. He lost to two noobs with no training whatsoever."

Excuse me?

EXCUSE ME?!

Did you not pay attention to the movie AT ALL?!

He got shot in the fucking stomach with a bigass crossbow. This is the same fucking crossbow that was sending Stormtroopers flying back 20 feet and killing them instantly.

This is the same fucking crossbow that we saw in Return of the Jedi that was powerful enough to destroy a small vehicle with one shot.

Basically, anything that gets shot with Chewbacca’s bowcaster gets blown into motherfucking oblivion.

This piece of shit is so powerful that instead of “Wookiee bowcaster”, we should call it “ The fuck you gun”.

But what happens when Kylo Ren gets shot with it?

He kneels down. Goes “Ouch”, then he gets the fuck up and goes on looking for a few bitches.

He is probably losing pints of blood from that wound, and he uses the force to keep his insides from spilling out. Then he goes on walking and pulls out his lightsaber and gets ready to fight.

How fucking badass is that? He just walked off a shot from Chewbacca’s OP bowcaster.

Not only that. He still manages to take on Finn and Rey by himself. Finn was a former Stormtrooper who trained in close-quarters combat with a riot control baton, and Rey spent 19 years on Jakku defending herself with a metal staff Don’t fucking tell me that Rey and Finn never had training

Then what happens?

It takes him no less than a minute to nearly kill Finn. After being shot with the unholy lovechild of a 12-gauge shotgun, a mortar launcher, and a crossbow, Kylo Ren still manages to get up and kick someone’s ass.

Then he gets ready for round two. He leaves Finn lying half-dead on the ground and gets ready to fight Rey.

Did you not hear Kylo Ren say that he was keeping Rey alive because he wanted to train her? Could it be that he’s actually going easy on her?

Only reason Rey beat Kylo was because Rey was never shot with Chewbacca’s fuck-you gun.

And on Takodana, when Kylo Ren goes into the forest looking for Rey, he manages to block every single shot she fires at him and then he force-paralyzes her with a single gesture.

And before this, he sensed Poe Dameron preparing to fire at him, and he just catches the blaster bolt in mid air and manages to keep it floating while walking around having a conversation. When was the last time we saw a force-user do that? Never. Not even Darth Vader or Yoda can do that.

Kylo Ren is not a pussy.

Kylo Ren is a fucking beast.

[kyloren-sithlord]

The Hunted and the Haunted

-TheCrackedKatana

Summary:

The town that shuns him turns to the witch called Armitage Hux for protection when seemingly random citizens turn up eviscerated and unrecognizable. With his skill for tracking the unnatural and rather unwanted psychometric abilities, Armitage is the only likely candidate for discovering what may be behind these attacks. But all magic comes with a price.

A while ago I shared this Halloween art with @crackedverbosity and we both ended up squeeing at one another about Celtic myth and magik, and then working together on this little monster. I’m so chuffed to have inspired her to write this story as it’s fab and I can’t say how wonderful she is.

[kyloren-sithlord]

anyway here’s a plot summary for 99% of Masquerade

Luke Skywalker: DAD NO

Vader: dad YES, actually,

[kyloren-sithlord]

Hey

Since I’m never on here, I’m moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Hey

Since I’m never on here, I’m moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Hey

Since I’m never on here, I’m moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Side note: please tell me who you are before you send me a request.

Hey

Since I’m never on here, I’m moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we’ll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Hey

Since I'm never on here, I'm moving to discord. Find me at kylorensithlord #2671 and we'll plot there!

[kyloren-sithlord]

Very gay texts for gay muses

[Text] Pride flags are on sale. Want one? They have all of them here.

[Text] How on earth did I ever think I was straight?

[Text] When you walk into a club and realise you’re definitely bi/pan

[Text] I had to pretend I was interested in boys/girls. It was horrible

[Text] I think that picture made me straight

[Text] My mum still thinks I’m straight

[Text] Have you seen the rainbow? The sky is gay

[Text] Where’s my cute girlfriend/boyfriend?

[Text] Yeah still gay

[Text] I was actually just told I’m “too cute to be gay”

[Text] Gay update: I’ve got a date next week. With a hot girl/guy!

[Text] Straight people will never understand the feeling of seeing a hot person and sighing to yourself because you’re so predictably gay

[kyloren-sithlord]

Ren kissed his temple, grinning. "It'd be kind of hypocritical of me to tell you to stop smoking while I still am. I don't think I could go through a pack a day, just financially speaking."

Benjamin always had been a goody two-shoes, so it didn't surprise him. No smoking, no drinking, nothing fun at all. Ren was glad that Hux was with him now.

"Yeah, I get that. I didn't much care through my school years, not that I do now. But I think I'm a bit more . . . controlled now. I used to pick fights with people just for fun, but that got me in some tough places."

He picked up the rest of the items they needed, including a variety of beer and even some wine, then went to check out. He looked at Hux for a long minute, smiling at him. He was so lucky to have found him that night. It was like fate.

kyloren-sithlord:

“Calm down, babe. It’s two-thousand and seventeen. People don’t care if two guys make out in the produce section, much less if I happen to slap your cute ass.” He winked at Hux and laughed at his expression.

He walked through the isles with Hux on his arm, shopping and listening to Hux. He hadn’t known Hux had lived in poverty. Hux struck him as the type to never lack anything in life. He couldn’t even imagine him living with less.

“You? A delinquent? I think your definition of delinquent is different than mine. See, I was a delinquent. I got tattoos and piercings and dyed my hair and got drunk. I hung out in my car with boys and got high and fucked while other people were in class. That’s being a delinquent. Drugs, sex, and theft. You? You seem like your delinquency consisted of not gelling your hair one day a week and smoking cigarettes. Which, while the image of you smoking is enough to get me going, isn’t being a delinquent.” He shrugged a bit, then kissed his cheek.

“Not that I’m judging, babe, ” he clarified.

          “ I still smoke cigarettes, ” he corrected, with a sardonic smile, self-depreciating, “ One pack a day, for… a little under twenty years, now. I worked in the service industry: cooking, cleaning… Everybody smokes. ”

          It was one of the few vices that his father allowed, so long as he did it on his own time, and so long as he never stank of booze or ash when he served them supper every evening. 

          “ Benjamin always pestered me to quit. I came close, once or twice. I’d stop for a couple of days, then… I’d burn through a pack in an hour, just to make up for what I’d missed. ”

          “ At least I won’t have to quit with you, hm? ”

          With a mournful smile, he clung to Kylo’s arm like a lifeline.

          “ …I had my reasons for behaving the way I did, as an adolescent. Smoking, drinking - ” holding his breath underwater until blackness crept at the corners of his vision “ To be honest, Ren, while I certainly wished to rise above my station, at times, a part of me just… didn’t give a damn. ”

          Perhaps that very same part of him still didn’t.

[kyloren-sithlord]

angsty thought for tonight?

a Winter Soldier-esque AU where Hux & Kylo are on a dangerous mission planetside and after taking a fall from a cliff, Kylo is presumed to be dead

Hux falls apart, refusing to leave the planet until he’s found Kylo alive but his troops tell him that no one could have survived that fall and he’s needed back on the Finalizer so he reluctantly leaves, sitting and drinking alone for the rest of the evening, unable to come to grips with losing his best friend and love

It’s one year later and Hux takes on more and more planetside missions with Kylo at the forefront of his mind constantly, like he’s driving him to fight harder and make everyone pay for taking him away too early

On a ground assault on a Resistance outpost, Hux’s squadron is attacked by Resistance fighters and a masked Jedi wielding a blue lightsaber, but Hux has been making an effort to train with a baton so he challenges the Jedi, feeling as though it’s his duty to carry on Kylo’s mission to eliminate the fools

But the Jedi is good and the only damage Hux manages to deal is striking him across the face, tearing his mask off and his hood down, and Hux can’t believe his eyes…

“Kylo?”

But the other’s expression is emotionless, his eyes empty as he stares at the man he once intended to spend his life with

“Who the hell is Kylo?”

[kyloren-sithlord]

I just wanted to draw fem-Hux in a pair of Louboutins… but then a First Order Criminal Organization AU happened. [Inspired by this post]

Bonus: