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the worst part about ocd and ocd-like tendencies is that you think hyper-analyzing your thoughts and constantly psychoanalyzing yourself will fix you but that's actually part of the disorder. it's the disorder. disordering.

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Nick Land, 89

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motivational speaker: you are not defined by your failures or your shortcomings. rather you are defined by the absences they create, shaped around the empty spaces, the lack inside you. your gaping need, spilling out embarrassingly, for all to see. utterly pathetic

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Natalie Díaz, from "American Arithmetic", Postcolonial Love Poem

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“some people don’t deserve redemption” redemption isn’t something that’s deserved, it’s something someone does. it’s making the choice to change the way you live your life, to be better, to do good things instead of bad things and try to make up for the bad things. and everyone can and should do that, at any time, no matter what they’ve done. we can’t change the past, but we can choose what kind of person to be now and in the future. we have the responsibility to do so. it is so completely not about “deserving.”

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And I never wonder how many would do the same for me, because I already know the answer to that.

I never did it for the gratitude, but some days I wonder how many people have thought about what they've said to me after I dressed their wounds or stayed up all night to make sure they were still breathing.

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I never did it for the gratitude, but some days I wonder how many people have thought about what they've said to me after I dressed their wounds or stayed up all night to make sure they were still breathing.

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Mary Oliver, "The Moths" in Dream Work

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i don’t know. i’m barely a person. i just want to be kind and hold someone’s hand. eat an ice cream cone. stare at the lake. feel the sun on my skin. lay in the grass. run through a sprinkler. it’s so easy to forget life is supposed to feel like a deep breath and not a gasp

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Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

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Vincent Van Gogh

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Kya Ka Ra Ba A (Naomi Kawase, 2001)

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Word on the Street

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the overwhelming feeling of sadness sometimes when someone treats me with kindness

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Imagine being necessary but not sufficient. LOL

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Margaret Atwood, “Thoughts from Underground”, Selected Poems: 1965-1975