lacebacks

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What the fuck is UP everypony?

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eyndill‌:

humans are absolutely batshit. envy had decided so over a century ago - perhaps it’d been a sentiment ingrained into them upon conception - but this predicament they found themself in at current only solidified their opinion.

“jump out?!”

“you’ve GOT to be joking, lady - ”

the blaring of a car horn drowns out their voice just momentarily as the blonde speeds through the dense traffic. how she had managed to get this far without at least clipping another vehicle is beyond the homunculus. if they were to open a door to bail, it would honestly make that a reality. they could always climb out of a window, but with how close the car comes to side-swiping another, they shrink back into the cushions, crossing their arms with a huff.

“where are we going?”

“Nope! I’m dead serious, bub,” the car screeched as she swerved again, and--thankfully--there seemed to be a bit of a lull in the traffic. Panty did not let up on the brakes.

“We’re going to wherever the condos are; I keep followin’ this gently curvin’ highway we’re on, right?” Like heck her passenger knew. It was worth a shot. She kept onto the highway, going deeper, or...she would’ve, if it wasn’t for the car decelerating on its own.

Oh fuck. 

It was out of gas.

“Scratch that, I’m startin’ to run on fumes here!”

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suplex51‌:

Fighting superhuman assassins? Cake-walk. Facing ghosts from the past, and learning to forgive himself? A challenge, but not an impossibility. Finding reasons to live, again? It’d been hard, but he’d done that, too. 

In Travis’ mind, however? Nothing that had ever come before rivaled the sheer difficulty of this. Of admitting what he was about to admit over text. 

TO: Angel Booty FROM: Suplex51

[txt]: yo.  [txt]: …  [txt]: please teach me how to fuck better.

Huh. So that was fairly direct and to the point. A Good sign, really, a guy who kept pussyfooting around his own inexperience was an uphill battle. Panty got herself comfortable in the bed, yawning.

TO: [?] TOUCHDOWN 

FROM: BEST BITCH

[txt]: that’s what u want huh?

[txt]: alright, I’m down.

[txt]: ....

[txt]: since you asked so nicely, you tell me where you think you are, where do you wanna start? 

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draglnc‌:

     ‘   i am not using this .   ’

and so he throws the makeshift weapon into the distance …. yeet ….

you know, she should know better about picking up strange underwear, but....

picks up the pole and tugs at the underwear w a shoe’d foot, popping a gun of some form up in the process, scrutinizing it. (still not touching it, however, she’s got its trigger looped through the pole somehow)

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falsanctus‌:

Shirou’s ever constant smile took an awkward turn at the use of such an expressive phrase. Despite appearances, he wasn’t quite used to someone being so liberal. “Ah, well. Not the word I would use, but… Yes, the sentiment remains.” 

Laying a hand on a broken pew, he drew back a thick covering of dust. The rest of the church was in similar disrepair, but a feeling lingered still. Turning back to the young woman, Shirou offered a roll of his shoulders; an awkward shrug. “It’s not your duty to fix this place, and trying to force you under some misguided notion that it would help would likely see your situation get worse. I’ve found that happens with a number of people.” And, he supposed, he quiet liked cleaning. But that was beside the point.

“So, yes. Wait and see. Things may change in the future. It may be difficult, but if you have any trouble, you can always find me here to help.” A smile punctuated the end of the sentence. “It’s the least I can do.”

She watched his movement across the church for once, still beside herself. Being told to just hold steady was....kind of liberating. This guy either genuinely believed she wasn’t the menace heaven knew her to be, or it simply wasn’t him to be like this. Panty actually had to stop and think. Even if it was chance, she wondered what the higher-ups thought about this. Were they commending her right now holding some basic form of restraint? (They’d regret that, if they were) 

She wasn’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth too much, though--after all fighting his advice meant actually trying to fix this church up, and like hell she’d perform such an act of hospitality.

A small chuckle came out again, which dissipated into a few coughs. Damn dust. “If you knew me, you wouldn’t be saying that. Ah well, I’ll take your word...and keep that in mind. Thanks, I guess?”

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time for me to break my hiatus bc i do need to get to replies at some point and don’t wanna hold up threads; ill be replying at some point soon as i do owe a few replies!! I hope you’ve all been well.

NEW HOUSEKEEPING NOTE; i altered my rules a few days back while i was messing with blog themes, and i want to formally address this--if you dont have the longform isola stats page (the one with the likes/dislikes/where to find your muse) and we’re not already plotting and you like a starter call, i will not be writing starters. It...came to my attention with the last call i was just absolutely stressed out trying to freeform it and while i could ask i kinda feel like an idiot doing so? and ultimately this is a hobby and having to worry about that ain’t fun. If I have no idea where to start with a starter then....it just ain’t happening.

if you liked the previous call and have an idea and do want to figure something out, feel free to send me an im! I just wanted to let everyone know im gonna be a bit stringent on calls.

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oh hey the rest of the starters will be dealt with throughout the week bc i may need to plot with people and i havent been able to focus very well lately. thank you for your patience!!

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Panty woke with a start; she passed the hell out in her condo room, apparently. Realizing nothing was going on in the slightest, she melted back into a more comfortable position in the bed, swiping up her phone to see if there was anything she needed to attend to.

Ah fuck, a missed call. Time to put those thumbs the fuck to work then. Wasn’t really her style to be a religious texter, but this number jogged her memory and from past experience, dealing with the call might be for the best.

[to: ?]

[from: best bitch]

              >oh. I forgot I gave you this number uh

              >whats up?

@suplex51

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falsanctus‌:

No sinner-detecting ability here, aside from God’s Resolution - which, fortunately for her, was unusable at the moment. Their meeting was nothing more then simple luck, coupled with a side of coincidence. Regardless, Shirou turned an earned to her. It was only right, and, besides, she looked as if she needed to speak her mind about something.

“Ah, I see,” was his initial answer. “In a situation like this, it’s hard to find purpose. I believe a number of people share your problems, or something akin to it, anyway.” Perhaps not the partying part, though he could vaguely understand the notion of it. Somewhat, anyway. Living within the confines of a church was something he could relate to, however. The emptiness and poor handling of the building’s decor left a bitter pang in Shirou’s stomach.

“Give it a little time,” Shirou offered, alongside a smile. “This pace has yet to rebuild itself. Everyone’s still finding their bearings. Once done, things may change. For both them, and you.” He gestured to the church’s crumbling interior. “The same can be said for this place, too. A little time and effort, and I’m sure it’ll be as good as new. That would solve one of your problems, no?” 

She sighed, kicking her legs up to cross them and folding her arms behind her. She hoped it’d rebuild itself...she was more used to causing chaos than fixing it, sadly. Panty took a breath, face contorting as dust made contact with her airways.

“Eh, I guess we’re all sorta uh...boned here, huh.” ‘Boned’ wasn’t really her first choice of words in the English dictionary but...she felt oddly compelled to at least sort of clean up her language. Ugh. What the hell? This other guy was all smiles but there seemed to be a bit of an air of melancholy on him, or something. She was probably imagining it. 

“Just wait it out? What, no telling me I need to fix this place up myself and if I don’t I’m gonna get dunked into that big ol’ crater in the middle?” She couldn’t help but scoff a little at her own statement, and she cracked a bit of a smile. 

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oof i haven’t been active here uh....teeny starter call? capping at 3 fellas. these might start out sorta short but you’re welcome to like, add onto length

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"I probably don't need to ask this, but... how was I?~"

“Eh,I’ve had worse. You haven’t done it very much, have you?”

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good evening i’d like to formally apologize to panty’s roomates, again

has she done anything? hell if i know, but she needs to be forgiven constantly

[lacebacks]

Your, uh... clothes are a little... askew.

She blinked, straightening out her clothes. It had been a while, hadn’t it? Whoops!

“Aha, thanks! Don’t wanna go out lookin’ like I just rolled outta bed, you know?”

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“I JUST GOT BACK FROM THE DOCTOR’S. I THINK I CAUGHT SOMETHIN’ FROM A GUY THE OTHER DAY,”

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“Fuck if the cops are getting such a wedgie over public nudity then maybe we should like, create a fuckin’ time and place where we can just streak around. Give clothes the bird. Run around in our undies.’“

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vereisten‌:

❝ Under municipal bylaw: public nudity is grounds for being fined. ❞

“Damn, seriously? I’m flat-ass broke!”