He/him || 21 || 馃嚘馃嚪馃嚘馃嚪馃嚘馃嚪 || I just reblog the funny post || Several fandoms and I'm not listing all of them
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one of my favorite twitter accounts that is defunct now is it was this account called like Crazy Optical Illusions or something and they would just post popular optical illusions but edit them so they werent optical illusions anymore and they would just pretend and people would be very confused / angry in the comments
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mosh pits are a thing because metalheads are all touch starved
#whenever I'm at a mosh pit I make sure to push away every other man there by sinking my hands into their man-tits as far as I can.#extra points if they're shirtless. and the hot ones often are ;)
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the tiktok itself is funny but i鈥檓 deeply obsessed with this dog





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nothing that stimulant medication and a coffee and an energy drink and a bump of coke and a good hard slap in the face and seven years in the harsh wilderness and a hug from a friend and a firm prostate milking and 250mg of MDMA crystals and a top of the line gaming PC and a tall glass of water and a distant memory of summer and piano lessons and four 20mg edibles and a sword that hungers for human blood and a well socialized tuxedo cat and a sushi dinner and a leather jacket and a power nap and a single beautiful rod of depleted uranium and regular estradiol injections and a typewritten sheet of paper bearing the solution to the hard problem of consciousness and nipple clamps and a lobotomy and a gun and another coffee can't fix
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one of my favorite twitter accounts that is defunct now is it was this account called like Crazy Optical Illusions or something and they would just post popular optical illusions but edit them so they werent optical illusions anymore and they would just pretend and people would be very confused / angry in the comments
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still thinking about that r/hypotheticalsituation post where someone was like "what if a potato chip spawned somewhere randomly in the world. and every hour the number of potato chips at that location would double. and the only way to get rid of them for good would be to eat all of the potato chips before they doubled again." and someone calculated that it would only take like, 48 hours of people ignoring a weird pile of potato chips before an absolutely irreconcilable number of potato chips was blanketing a city.
and then people were like "no wait if it spawns randomly in the world, it's highly likely it would be in an ocean" and then people were debating whether there were enough small fish swimming at the surface in the open ocean that would be able to eat a potato chip and thus save humanity from the potato chip apocalypse.
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Kill your self laura snapes
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joe biden: how do i look in this chef hat, giuseppe?
giuseppe, the presidential butler: waifish and breedable as always, muy lord
joe biben: fabulous. pass me the Improbable Meat
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young man. what is that you have found.
I said young man. you picked it up off the ground.
I said young man. you should put that thing down.
I don't think! that! you! should! eat that!
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Just saw a gigantic iceberg drifting by
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i need a clairvoyant gf who's always jacking off to visions of my death and putting me in dangerous situations so she can ogle at what would happen to me if they played out before saving me at the last second so bad tbch
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Some people say that there are no stupid questions, which is blatantly false. Of course there are stupid questions, and if you have one, you had better ask it, before you go and do make a stupider mistake. Stupid questions are more important than intelligent ones. I鈥檓 willing to bet more people die because of stupid mistakes than because of intelligent ones.
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