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[lacrymae]

totally platonic/j

[lacrymae]

Something that literally changed my life was working with a friend on a coding thing. He was helping me create an auto rig script and was trying to explain something to me but his words were just turning into static in my brain. I was tired and confused and there was so many new concepts happening.

I could feel myself working toward a crying meltdown and was getting preemptively ashamed of what was about to happen when he said, “Hey, are you someone who benefits from breaks?”

It broke me.

Did I benefit from breaks? I didn’t know. I’d never taken them.

When a problem frustrated or upset me I just gritted my teeth and plowed through the emotional distress because eventually if you batter and flail at something long enough you figure it out. So what if you get bruised on the way.

I viscerally remembered in that moment being forced to sit at the table late into the night with my dad screaming at me, trying to understand math. I remembered taking that with me into adulthood and having breakdowns every week trying to understand coding. I could have taken a break? Would it help? I didn’t know! I’d never taken one!

“Yes,” I told him. We paused our call. I ate lunch. I focused on other stuff for half an hour. I came back in a significantly better state of mind, and the thing he’d been trying to explain had been gently cooking in the back of my head and seemed easier to understand.

Now when I find myself gritting my teeth at problems I can hear his gentle voice asking if I benefit from breaks. Yes, dear god, yes why did I never get taught breaks? Why was the only way I knew to keep suffering until something worked?

I was relating to this same friend recently my roadtrip to the redwoods with my wife. “We stopped every hour or so to get out and stretch our legs and switch drivers. It was really nice. When I was a kid we’d just drive twelve hours straight and not stop for anything, just gas. We’d eat in the car and power through.”

He gave a wry smile, immediately connecting the mindset of my parents on a road trip to what they’d instilled in me about brute forcing through discomfort. “Do you benefit from breaks?” he echoed, drawing my attention to it, making me smile with the same sad acknowledgement.

Take breaks. You’re allowed. You don’t have to slam into problems over and over and over, let yourself rest. It will get easier. Take. Breaks.

[lacrymae]

🥟

[lacrymae]

[lacrymae]

mid-2000s hat simulator [x]

[lacrymae]

keys from skyrim

[lacrymae]

[lacrymae]

5 articles that will make you a better reader

I have a written a lot on the importance of reading and why it is necessary for us all to develop the habit of reading not for any extrinsic reward but for fulfillment, satisfaction, and personal development

Four Levels of Reading by Mortimer Adler

How to Choose Your Next Book

The Feynman Technique

Meditation on Reading

Just Twenty-Five Pages a Day

Read more!

[lacrymae]

[lacrymae]

So! The boop phenomenon is over.

Did yall get the three badges? I hope not (you crazy boopers).

[lacrymae]

and on April 13th, 2006, niel banged out the tunes, and it was good

[lacrymae]

at some point you have to realize that you actually have to read to understand the nuance of anything. we as a society are obsessed with summarization, likely as a result of the speed demanded by capital. from headlines to social media (twitter being especially egregious with the character limit), people take in fragments of knowledge and run with them, twisting their meaning into a kaleidoscope that dilutes the message into nothing. yes, brevity is good, but sometimes the message, even when communicated with utmost brevity, requires a 300 page book. sorry.

[lacrymae]

𝖗𝖔𝖘𝖊𝖘

[lacrymae]

★ 【kurou】 「 喜多ちゃんまとめ_02 」 ☆ ✔ republished w/permission ⊳ ⊳ follow me! insta • x • bsky

[lacrymae]

[lacrymae]

｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡ ﾟ. April will bring blessings.

ﾟ･｡･ﾟ

[lacrymae]