lalast0ne - Tumblr blog

[lalast0ne]

Saving the world, one joint shower at a time 😏

[lalast0ne]

Sunday ❤️

[lalast0ne]

I trust you

Wider

*I had left the house early to check in on the club and bring some paperwork home for Layla to look through. I despised going through most paperwork but for some reason she loved it. It almost was a calm to her to work on a spreadsheet. One of her quirks that only made me love her more and saved me from unnecessary anger. I did a drive by at Kingston’s house after leaving the club. He had become my eyes and ears even more these past several weeks as I stayed close to Layla. He was keeping me apprised of all things Carlos. That man’s days were numbered and my hands itched for when I would get to take my knife and carve my blade into his skin. Watch the blood weep from his body. Let the pain paralyze him before I stole his last breathe and send him on a one way ticket to hell. It would be one of my top ten favorite days. Even passing the day I killed my bitch of a mother. Kingston gave me all updates and I walked through the woods with Killer running ahead of me to get home. He stood patiently at the door and as I came up the steps, the noise from my boots was overshadowed by slamming doors. I stepped inside and approached the kitchen to hear another door slam. Little Ball of Fire was angry at doors it seemed this morning. I stood there a few seconds as another door was abused.* Layla, did the kitchen piss you off?

Layla

*I slam another cupboard door and spin around at the sound of your voice.  My hair all over the place from running my fingers thru it too much and my nostrils flared as anger gets the better of me.  Today was not a good day.  In fact it was probably fair to say that today was a very bad day.  I'd woken with my mood severely dipped, I'd nearly killed Jake this morning by making him peanut butter on toast for breakfast before he went to school and now I couldn't seem to locate the coffee which I know was in a particular cupboard because I'd spent a quite a while in this kitchen, over the past week, memorising where everything went. I grit my teeth staring at you, my shoulders around my ears in annoyance.* Have you been moving things? Because I KNOW I put the coffee back in THIS cupboard *I point dramatically to the cupboard by the kettle and continue to stare at you accusingly* Is it not enough that I can't remember my fucking life, now you have to toy with me by moving things around?! *I turn away from you and continue looking, slamming door after door*

Wilder

*I stare at you for a full minute and debate turning around and leaving the house again. I left with you sleeping peacefully and came back to someone worse than a grouch. You make even my grinch look like a saint. More doors slam and before you can abuse that same one again, I, against my better judgment, step into the kitchen and open the door above the kettle. I move that fancy package of cookies you were eating last night and hand you the coffee in question.* Is this what you were looking for?

Layla

*I stop what I'm doing and slowly turn my head to look at you. Steam may as well be coming from my ears as I take the canister from your hand and slam it down on the counter.  Most normal people would probably say 'thank you' but my manners are clearly absent this morning. Instead I raise my eyebrows at you and speak thru gritted teeth and I begin searching for my mug.* Yes, Wilder. That's exactly what I'm looking for. *Slamming another cupboard and then a drawer, I turn back to you, my anger escalating* Where have you been anyway? *I forcefully making my drink refusing to look at you until I have no choice, my eyes still wide* I nearly killed Jake this morning. Thanks for telling me he had an allergy to peanuts.

Wilder

You’re welcome. *I hand you your mug and step back into a safe zone.* I went by the club first thing to see how the restaurant and club did over the weekend. I brought paperwork home that I thought we could work on together. Clearly when your mood improves. *I swear I see literal fire burn from your ears like a cartoon character. Reminds me of my childhood and mother and I take another step back and hold in my laugh.* That little shit told you he was allergic to peanuts?

Layla

*I snatch the mug from you and mimic your words like a petulant child "You're welcome" as I slam around a little more to release my frustration which only continues to build and your words don't help* When my mood improves ... I wouldn't expect that to happen any time soon. *I relax ever so slightly when the aroma of the coffee tickles my nose, I lift the mug, smiling ever so slightly to myself as I go to take my first sip until your words about Jake register. I tilt my head to the side and my shoulder rolls in annoyance* I'm sorry .. could you say that again ... because I swear you just said he's NOT allergic to peanuts.

Wilder

He’s not allergic peanuts. He hates peanut butter. *I step in closer to you.* Do not and I mean do not get on him for him telling you he was allergic. He has his reasons and we are not dragging up his past and what he went through. Let him apologize to you on his on time. *I look around the kitchen and before I can keep the words inside, ask the most stupid question in the history of questions.* What is with your attitude today?

Layla

*I feel myself calming slightly, even when you put your foot down.  As much as I hate being told what to do, I'm not about to make a teenager feel bad for something so stupid. And then you go and say the worst thing you possibly could. I laugh sarcastically* Oh I can't possibly imagine why I'm in this mood! *I hold my hands out to the side* I'm having a FANTASTIC start to the year. I tell you what, Husband, shall we reminisce ... lets take a walk down memory la ... oh no ... wait ... that's right! I STILL have no memories. *My eyes begin to fill with tears, as I walk back and forward in front of you. I blink furiously, taking a deep breath to stop them from spilling over because I'm sick and tired of crying* STILL!! *I walk toward you with my finger outstretched and poke your chest* Maybe that's it.

Wilder

*Your words flame the anger inside me and I step into you, pushing you back until you are trapped against the wall and my body. You are forced to look up as I stare down at you.* THIS IS NOT ALL ABOUT YoU LAYLA. *My anger more evident now when I raise my voice.* Yes, you were poisoned and lost your memories but you are here and alive. I lost my wife that day. Jake lost the person who saved him. Salem and all the workers, lost a best friend and manager. We lost you even with you here. It’s not only you who was impacted. *My blood boiling now.* I will gladly put you six feet in the ground if you rather be dead. *I clutch the knife on the counter beside me.* You don’t want to test me on that Layla.

Layla

*All I can do is stare and blink. Your words resinating and stinging a lot. Backed up against the wall, my eyes move between your face and the knife clutched in your hand. I place my hands on your chest and push on you as hard as I can but you don't move, so I scream back at you* I KNOW IT ISN'T ALL ABOUT ME, YOU ASSHOLE! I KNOW THAT! *I rise up on tiptoes so that I can get right in your face like you did mine.* But did it ever occur to you that not one other person feel's under pressure to remember anything. You all have you memories in tact. So you'll have to excuse me if I'm being a little bit selfish and feel a tad sorry for myself in this situation!

Wilder

Stop feeling fucking sorry for yourself and enjoy that you are alive. Enjoy that you have family around you who loves you. *I glare at you.* I FUCKING LOVE YOU LAYLA. WITH OR WITHOUT YOUR MEMORIES. *My mouth crashes against yours in an angry kiss, forcing my tongue past your lips. *I growl low in my chest.* Trust in me. Time will bring back you.

Layla

*My lips parts without a fight and I groan softly as your tongue slips into my mouth.  Natural instinct has my own tongue caressing yours and I whimper softly and all the fire that had been building within me vanishes. I sigh when you pull back and nod my head in defeat because you're right.  I have so many people who love me and I AM lucky to be alive. My hand cups you face and I smile softly as I tease your beard* I trust you, Wilder Steele. I'm sorry.

Wilder

There is nothing to be sorry for Layla. *I take your hands in mine, anchoring us together. A grin forms and I laugh.* On the other hand, you should apologize to the kitchen and all the doors you abused.

[lalast0ne]

Drunken rollercoasters

My first week at home had been a rollercoaster of emotions. I cried, a lot. My levels of frustration, with myself, were thru the roof and no matter how much people told me it would all be ok, I was having a hard time believing it.  I knew it would be a challenge coming home with Wilder and I don’t regret my decision, but it hadn’t had the desired effect on my memory that I had been hoping for.

Wilder has been nothing but amazing. He truly has the patience of a saint when it comes to my moods, giving reassuring cuddles and whispering comforting words in my ear when I need them most.  He’s still insistent that I don’t over do things and, to be honest, as little as I do during the days, I go to bed exhausted, both physically and mentally. Every night I walk up the stairs with Wilder holding my hand, kiss him goodnight, then head into our bedroom, while he goes to the room across the hall. I lay in a huge bed, alone, hoping that tomorrow is that day I’ll wake up with all my memories restored.  I want to return to normal life but I have no clue what normal life is.

3 days later than originally planned, Salem Lincoln sweeps into the house like she belongs here. 

Her almost white hair is piled on top of her head with tendrils falling around her face, softening her sharp features. The precise makeup she wears emphasises her cat like eyes, which are to be envied, and her many tattoos are absolutely mesmerising. She’s a real life pin up girl and if I ever had a girl crush, she’d definitely be it. 

The easy banter with Wilder and the sisterly affection she gives Jake make me feel slightly uneasy for a few seconds. Almost like I’m interrupting. When you don’t quite know your place, in your own home, it’s hard to watch someone else fit in so effortlessly. 

I make my way to the chair at the table in the kitchen and watch as the blonde bombshell makes herself at home. Hanging her jacket on the coat hook by the back door and kicking off her biker boots.

“Off you fuck, then.” I raise an eyebrow and scoff a laugh when she brightly aims those words at Wilder and Jake while she manoeuvres around the kitchen grabbing bottles of alcohol and glasses that are needed to begin our “meeting”.  Wilder’s hesitation to leave is written all over his face but Salem insists he give us space to work otherwise she is going to 

take me to the club.  That seems to be the only persuasion he needs.  A low growl reverberates around the kitchen and then he calls the dogs. Those muddy boots are on his feet and he and Jake were out the door within minutes, but not before he drops a kiss on top of my head and gives a stern warning to Salem to make my drinks weak because of my meds. 

According to Salem, this was something we did once a month; Changing up the ‘special’ cocktail menu so people never know what to expect when they come to the club.  We like the element of surprise in all manner of things at The Steele Cage because we want people to spread the word and to return.

Within 20 minutes of the men walking out the backdoor, I’ve heard the cliff note version of her life; Before and since she’s moved to Blacksoul, Her turbulent family background, how she came to be in the town and how she came to work at the club, all the while she continues to mix the drinks. 

“And you’re boyfriend is Kingston? Wilders best friend?” She pauses and looks at me over her shoulder.

“Wilder’s sent you fishing for details, has he?” She laughs softly and shakes her head. “Regardless of whatever sneaky lies that man has told you, you’d never tell him anything because he’d torment me and probably Kingston for all eternity.”

In the time it would take me to mix one cocktail, there are now 15 glasses of different colour drinks lined up down the centre of the table and Salem takes her seat opposite as she places the last one down.

“So, how are you finding it?” There’s something remarkably easy about opening up to a stranger, it’s why so many people walk into a bar and open up to their bartender. 

“That’s a loaded question.” I raise the first glass and take a generous sip, nodding my approval as I swallow and pass the glass to her, then begin to talk “This is where I need to be … with my husband .. but it’s hard. I’m petrified that I’m going to disappoint him. Both of them.  They’re used to me being a certain way, playing a certain role in the house and their lives. What if I don’t get that back?”

“Then you’ll adapt and work it out together because your their family and Wilders world. They’d do anything for you, Layla, and they’ll be by your side no matter how hard it gets.” She smiles wide and I take another sip of the drink when it’s passed back to me as she continues chattering “Now, Boss man insisted I water down the drinks because of your meds, but I checked and none of them are affected by alcohol. So, I say, lets get drunk.”

Salem’s looks alone are enough to make people take notice. Team that with her charisma and her ability to make everything seem like a good idea ... well ... men and women alike didn’t stand a chance in her presence.  

Salem Lincoln is undoubtedly a bad influence .. and I completely understand why I hired her. 

She hands me the second glass filled with a soft green drink, smiling sweetly as I take a large sip and swallow down  “Wow!” I cough a little which earns me a laugh. Suddenly I feel like she’s on a one woman mission to get me very drunk. “What’s this one called?”

She gives me an evil smirk over the rim of the glass and takes a tiny sip then holds the drink up “This one is called Death In The Afternoon.”

How appropriate.

[lalast0ne]

The second First Kiss

Wilder

*I stood in the edge of the room, my shoulder against the door frame with a cup of coffee in hand. The liquid had grown cold as I watched Layla. I wanted to give her space and not crowd her yet I wanted to engulf her in flames. Let her consume my energy and pull all my strength from me. Let her memories flood her mind. She had been home for a couple of days. The animals abandoning me for her. Even Killer had turned into a traitor. Pussy was the only one who stayed in my camp. Jake was back and forth with where he stayed and Layla easily fit in with him when he was home. I pushed off the wall and turned to head downstairs when I cocked my head back to see Layla’s eyes on me.* Is there anything special you want for lunch? I’m ordering in.

Layla

*It had been an interesting couple of days. Trying to settle back into a life you knew nothing about was no easy task. Wilder had  given me the master bedroom, insisting he sleep in the guest room across the hall. His insistence was forced, I could see that. Just like I could see he’s want to touch me and comfort me, every time he was near. I’d walked around every inch of this house .. and there were a lot inches to explore. I’d seen parts of me in almost every room but still nothing jogged my memory. 

My ‘meeting with Jake had gone well. He’d hugged me so tight when he’d arrived home from school. A sweet kid and a lot taller than I expected him to be. He’d been dipping in and out of the house since then, but always checked on me when he was here.  

I know Wilders behind me, watching. He’s never far from wherever I am. I don’t know if that’s always been the case or he’s need to be near is just super heightened at the moment. I look back over my shoulder when I hear a shuffle, smiling when he turns back to look at me. He really is handsome .. in and out of clothes. I blush at the thought and the memory of our encounter this morning when I’d accidentally walked into the bathroom while he was shaving .. naked. I hadn’t expected him to be there but then I guess it is OUR bathroom that we share. 

I clear my throat when you ask a question Bringing me back to the present* I’ll have whatever you recommend. You seem to have good taste.

Wilder

*I take a step into our bedroom and stand in front of you, reaching up with my free hand to tuck your hair behind your ear.* Seem to have good taste? *A smile crosses my face and I laugh with ease.* You hate my taste in food. It normally involves all the greasy stuff while you like cleaner, rabbit tasting food. With the exception of sweets. I knew I would get you over to the dark side one day. *I tap your nose.* No turning back now. Cheeseburgers, fries and onions rings coming right up.

Layla

*Instant shivers for all the right reasons run down my spine. That’s what I experience every time your close. When you reach out and your fingers graze against my skin as you tuck a strand of hair behind me ear, there’s instant fire. Your easy nature relaxes me and that smile causes my own to tug at the corners of my lips.* Corrupt me while you can, Wilder .. once my memories are back .. *What? Once my memories are back what will happen? I have a feeling he try to corrupts me at every opportunity and succeeds. I chuckle to myself and tilt my head to the side, my eyes never leaving yours* Once they’re back I’m sure the attempts of corruption will continue.

Wilder

*I can’t help the smirk forming and I take your hand to lead you downstairs.* You make it hard for me to corrupt you Little Ball of Fire. But I try every chance I get. Especially getting you into the woods. *I let go of your hand so I can order the food.* Salem is hoping to spend time with you tomorrow. She wants you to help decide on new drinks for the club. It’s your thing and don’t worry, I checked your ID and you are old enough to drink.

Layla

I completely believe that *I follow you down the stair and into the living room, taking a seat on the couch as you place the order for food. I look around the room, once again familiarising myself with the everything in it, then focus on you when the phone conversation ends and you take a seat opposite me. I rack my brains trying to remember who Salem is, then remember she’s the neighbour/manager of the club we own. I laugh softly at your joke and frown slightly* Of course. I’m happy to help where I can .. if you think I’ll be any help. *The thought of seeing all these people, who I supposedly know, is daunting but I know it needs to be down sooner rather than later* Will she be coming here? Or are we going to the club?

Wilder

*I look over my shoulder where all the liquor is on the counter.* I figured here would be best. Next week, I thought I could take you to the club and show you around. If you are up to it. *I lean forward with my forearms on my knees.* No trying to get any gossip out of Salem about me. I’m a closed book. *I wink and stand when the doorbell rings and go pay for the food.* But if you can get any information about Kingston out of her, I’m all ears. He is closed more than me lately.

Layla

Here is probably for the best *I bring my legs up to my chest and rest my chin on my knees. Butterflies flutter around my stomach at the thought of next week, already. Needing to learn faces and names all over again but instead of letting my nerve crack the surface, I smile and nod my head* That sounds perfect. *I raise an eyebrow in question at the mention of a new name if not yet heard but hold off asking the actual question until you return with our food, watching you dip into the bag and pull out our lunch* Who’s Kingston?

Wilder

*I grab two bottles of water and sit back down, shoving some fries in my mouth before I speak.* Kingston is my best friend. My right hand man. He stays out of sight for the most part. He likes Salem and she likes him but they hate each other. *I shake my head and laugh before turning serious.* I’ve done things bad in my past Layla. I still do them but it is all done to protect the ones I love and to protect this town.

Layla

*The fries turn to glue in my mouth and I swallow hard contemplating your words. Do I even want to know? To ask questions is possibly like opening Pandora’s box and I’m not sure I’m ready for that. I dip my water then place the bottle on the table* Is this a new revelation? Or do I already know what bad things you do? *I bite on my lip momentarily thinking then speak again, my expression as serious as your own* Do these bad things have anything to do with what happened to me?

Wilder

*I take a huge bite of my cheeseburger and consider how to answer.* You were aware of some of them. I pride myself of having a town with no crime. That has changed lately as people push my buttons and try to tear me down. *I reach across and take your hand in mine.* You got caught in between. Someone was after me so they take a shot at you and mark my words, they will pay.

Layla

A town with no crime is impossible, surely. You can’t manage that kind of task by yourself *I smile as you take my hand, our fingers lacing together. The tone of your voice tells me your not joking. Who ever did this to me will pay .. and I don’t think it’ll be with jail time.* Do what you feel necessary .. but not if it’s going to be dangerous to you. *I hold your gaze, my lips in a straight line* Please.

Wilder

You have my promise baby girl. No one will get that close again. *I reach for you and pull you in my lap, my mouth against your hair.* Them getting too close to you was the final straw. *I hold you tight, the world fading away. It’s just you and I as it always should be. My restraint fades and I turn your face to mine, capturing your bottom lip between my teeth. I kiss you hard, sucking on your tongue and then soften the kiss.*

Layla

*The moment your lips touch mine, my mind goes blank and my body burns with longing. I instinctively part my lips and welcome your tongue into my mouth, making some kind of noise that I don’t recall ever making before. With my body presses to yours and your arms around me, I’m trapped but I don’t care. It feels right .. at least that the impression I’m getting from my body and when my mind eventually becomes less fuzzy it acknowledges that there are worse places to be than in your lap. I hear my heartbeat in my ears and my eyes remain closed when you brush your lips against mine one final time and pull back. My voice is a throaty whisper and I smile at you a little goofily* Clearly I married you for your kissing skills.

Wilder

And hear I thought it was for my good looks. *I loosen my grip on your waist and grin at you.* No more being a distraction from the onion rings. *I lift one from the bag, while keeping you on my lap and hand it to you.* Have I brought you over to the dark side with my food choices? You can’t deny how good greasy food is.

Layla

And here I was thinking I was a pleasant distraction *I laugh taking the ring from you and bite into it, rubbing my stomach as I chew and swallow. I lick over my lips and smirk at you* If there’s one thing I’ve never forgotten, it’s that the bad stuff always tastes better.

Wilder

I knew you would see it my way Mrs. Steele. *I brush my thumb across your bottom lip, my eyes locked on yours.* I know you don’t remember but it changes nothing. I love you Little Ball of Fire and will for the rest of my life.

Layla

*My lips part again as your thumb slide across my lower lip. I’m tempted to take it between my teeth but I don’t. Instead I remain motionless. Your words makes my heart beat faster. I know 4 weeks a go I’d have likely said it back to you without consideration or hesitation. I know the feelings are there, deep down. My body tells me it every single day. I just need my mind to catch up. I lift my hand to cup your face and smile*  I can see why I fell in love with you, Mr. Steele.

Wilder

My dark and brooding personality. *On instinct, I lean into your touch and take these few minutes before Jake busts in the house from school, to enjoy us.* We have all the time in the world for you to remember. Until then, we will make new memories Layla.

[lalast0ne]

Homeward Bound

Layla

*I sit on the edge of the bed tapping my foot against the floor and biting my thumb nail as my eyes flick between the clock on the wall, the watch on my wrist and my parents. He’s not late, I silently tell myself. Not even a little bit, actually. If anything he’ll be extremely early, even if he doesn’t arrive for another 30 mins, but my nerves are getting the better of me. 

“Stop biting your nails, Pebble.”

My moms firm tone has me grimacing and I bring my hands to my lap then proceed to fidget even more. 

I was so concerned with my feelings and insisting I wanted to go home with Wilder because I believed it would be best for me that I hadn’t stopped to consider that just maybe he’d had a change of heart about taking me home. Maybe it was too much to expect or to ask. 

I look at my Dad who gives me a small smile then comes over and wraps an arm around my shoulder “He’ll be here. That man is reluctant to let you out of his sight on a normal day. Stop worrying.” The door opens but my relief is short lived when the doctor enters the room with a stack of papers. My discharge forms, which Dad takes, and a bag of medication which Mom slips into my case. I listen carefully and nod as I’m reminded to continue my exercises daily, to not put pressure on myself and if the headaches become too severe I’m to contact the doctor immediately. 

“Where’s Mr. Steele?” The doctor looks around as if expecting Wilder to materialise in the centre of the room. 

“He’ll be here.” I force a smile and nod matter of factly, fighting the nerves. He will be here.. I silently tell myself, he will.*

Wilder

*Of all mornings to be stuck behind a train. BlackSoul rarely saw any trains. If I had to count on one hand, I’ve probably only seen three dead stopped in my town. I think I put the fear of God in the last conductor that he made sure never to stop again. I glare at the car and make a mental note to have another word or two with this train company. Finally, after what seems like an hour, the train slowly picks up speed and I floor the gas to cross the tracks at the same time the train car barely crosses it. I was at the hospital in minutes, stomping my boots loudly down the hallway, awakening many patients I’m sure. If only I cared. My eyes were focused on only one room and when I opened the door to hear the doctor asking for me, I made my presence known. The doctor quit talking and I walked straight up to Layla. Nervous energy was rolling off her and I hate it. I needed to be the calm she always was for me. I slide my hand down her arm to lock our fingers together.* Are you ready to blow this joint Layla?

Layla

*All eyes fly to the door as it pushes open with force and my shoulders relax immediately. Wilders frame fills the door frame for a few seconds before he stalks toward me with purpose and takes my hand in his, lacing our fingers together. I release the breath I didn’t realise I’d been holding and my body leans slightly against you as an entire zoo begins to stamp around in my stomach.  My smile must be wider than the Cheshire cats and it’s all because of you. Because you’re here. I look to my Dad who gives me a quick wink before shooting a warning look to my Mom, then I look up at you when you speak, nodding eagerly* I’m so ready. *I squeeze your fingers then hop down from the bed, throwing my bag over my shoulder* Take me home.

Wilder

*I take your bag from you and kiss your forehead, letting your hand go long enough that you can hug your parents. I shake your dad’s hand and assure your mom, who is still on my bad side, for what feels like the millionth time, that you are in good hands. At least one Stone is one my/our/ side.* The animals can’t wait to see you. Do you remember all their names I wrote down?

Layla

*I hug my parents hard. Even though Mom has been driving me crazy about going to live with them, rather than you, her heart was in a good place .. it always is.

“You call if you need anything, ok?”

That’s code for me to call if I change my mind. We all know it* I will, thanks Mom. *I turn back to you and smile, taking a deep breath as the nerves kick up again for a whole different reason. Going back to a life I don’t know feels daunting all of a sudden but I nod my head at your question* I do .. it’s kinda like having the 7 dwarfs live with us. *I reel of the pets names checking them off on my fingers as I say them* Killer, Luna, Ghost, Whiskey, Blaze, Nimbus and *eyes you* Pussy. I figure if I yell a name, ones bound to come.

Wilder

*I smirk as you name them off correctly and even list off Pussy. Taking your hand in mine once again, we head to leave the room.* I think you deserve a treat for getting them all right. We can hit up the ice cream drive through on the way home. It’s my favorite. *You smile at your parents one last time and we slowly walk down the hallway to the elevator.* I do have one thing to tell you about before we get home. He wasn’t in any of the pictures.

Layla

*I have a smile on my face and I’m so happy to finally be leaving this place after, what feels like, a lifetime. But the sadness of the situation isn’t lost on me. I should know that that’s your favourite without you having to tell me.  I should be able to go to the ice cream drive thru with you and order your ice cream, knowing that you’ll enjoy it. I swallow down the lump that lodging itself in my throat as the realisation of what we’re about to face hits me. 

I’m walking hand in hand with you, my husband, and I know so little about you. I don’t voice any of this. Instead I smile up at you and nod enthusiastically* I’d like that a lot. *We come to a stop at the elevators and I hit the button, my smile faltering slightly as you continue to talk* He?

Wilder

*I can see the wheels turning in your mind and your eyes telling me all your emotions. From happy and excited to scared and frustrated.* Ice cream is really not my favorite. I wanted you to find a flavor you wanted to try. *We step on to the elevator when the doors open and they close behind us.* He. Jake. A 13 year old teenager that lives with us. We kind of took him in and raise him now. He loves your parents. He goes and stays with them whenever he wants. He has a crush on Salem, our club manager. *I see you smile and I growl.* It’s not that cute. But he hangs out at her house, which is across the street from ours. She has been extremely helpful. He’s excited for you to get home. *Laughs* Just be careful when he tries to tell you how much you love this gross mac and cheese he makes. He can’t get anyone to like it but himself. *I turn to face you, lifting my hand to pull your hair.* I promise it will all be ok Layla. Trust me. Please.

Layla

*You fondly talk of Jake, telling me the basics of him and it raises so many more questions that I’ll make sure to fire at you later .. because for now all I can think is .. I have a kid. Not one I’ve given birth to but one I .. we’ve .. been raising for some time, by the sounds of it. I laugh softly and nod my head  as the elevator descends and you give me the warning about Jakes bad cooking* I consider myself warned *I turn to face you and smile as you tug on my hair. It’s the softest tug.. a sign of affection* you shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep, Wilder. *I raise my hand and tug gently on your beard* But I trust you completely.

Wilder

I never break a promise Little Ball of Fire. *The elevator doors open and I lead you to the car, helping you in and then put your bag in the trunks. I knock on the trunk when I close it and get in the drivers seat.* BlackSoul is not too far away. We will be home before you know it. *I reach my arm across and wait for you to take my hand.*

[lalast0ne]

Today’s the day

Today was the day that I, and the rest of my family, had been waiting for. I was finally escaping these 4 walls for good. I was going home. Home to a house I didn’t remember with a man I had no memory of ... but home none the less. 

I stare at the case on the bed and my clothes surrounding it, picking up an item at a time and laying it carefully inside as I try to ignore the ‘whispered’ conversation going on in the corner of the room. 

Every sentence that passes between my parents grows louder and louder. I risk a glance over and see my Dads shoulders sag in defeat “He’s her next of kin.” My mom who no longer seems to care that I’m actually in the room replies matter of factly “And we’re her parents.”

They both turn to look at me as if finally remembering that I’m in the room. Dad gives me a lopsided smile then heads to the door “I’m going to grab some coffee. Do you want anything?” I shake my head then avert my eyes to my mom who shifts from foot to foot, clearly waiting for him to leave the room before she launches into some kind of speech. 

“How are you feeling?” She starts picking up my clothes and helping load then into my case.

“Nervous, excited, relieved to be out of here that’s for sure.” I laugh softly and place my hand on my stomach, trying to calm the million butterflies that are crashing around in there. 

“Where’s Wilder this morning? I thought he’d be here already” There’s a hint of something in her voice but I can’t quite work out if it’s disappointment that he’s not here or hope that I’ve changed my mind about going home with her and Dad.  

“He said he had to check in 

on the club this morning and then would be here after that.” She nods her head then stops what she’s doing and reaches for my hand.

“Sweetheart, please reconsider coming home with your father and I. It’s familiar to you and there won’t be any pressure on you to remember anything.”

I look at her, listening to her last ditch attempt to change my mind and grasp her hand “Mom, was  I going to leave Wilder, before all of this?”

“No, you weren’t.”

“Ok. Well ... was I unhappy in any aspect of my life before all this?”

“No, you were not” she pauses for a moment then continues “But you don’t know him, Layla.”

A small plays on my lips as his face flashes up in my mind. “No mom, my mind doesn’t remember our life together. My body knows him.” I release her hand and reach for the one photo album I still have with me, that thankfully wasn’t damaged when I launched it across the room “Being with him in our house .. our home ... i have a better chance at remembering my life.”

“And what if you don’t remember?” Its a thought I’ve had countless times since I woke but it’s the first time someone else has said it out loud, to me.

“Then I get to build my relationship with my husband from scratch, to fall in love with him all over again and get another happy ever after.”

Mom walks around to my side of the bed and take the album from me, placing on the bed then cuddling me. I see the glisten in her eyes before she rests her cheek against mine “I just worry about you. I worry it’ll be too much.”

“How about this? If it becomes too much .. I’ll come straight to your house?” She pulls back to look at me, her hands grasping my face but I continue before she can get a word out “He’s part of me, Mom, I can feel it. When he’s not here it feels wrong. I need to be with him. I want to be with my husband.” 

Sighing in defeat she nods “Ok, Pebble. I won’t say another word about it.”

[lalast0ne]

Tears

The week had been a testing one for everybody. I’d not made it out of hospital for Christmas which had not only sent me into a state of depression but meant my patience level were now running at zero while frustration/irritation/anger levels were at an all time high.  I tried to suppress the negativity but it was all I seemed to be feeling. Anger that I was still under going tests which were telling us nothing. Irritation with the physiotherapist team because, even though there had been significant improvement (their words not mine), progress was slow and I still resembled Bambi on ice when I walked. But my main frustration was at myself because I still couldn’t remember anything about my life. 

The doctors kept repeatedly telling me that the memory loss was temporary .. but how temporary was temporary? Temporary could be weeks, months or even years for all we knew.  I didn’t want to wait that long.

Wilder had left the photo albums behind for me and I’d looked through them multiple times, every single day.  I knew what photo’s would be on the next page, I knew the name of every single person in the photo’s, because I’d been reminded repeatedly, but I sill couldn’t remember the pictures being taken.

I flip through the pages of our wedding album. Undoubtedly my favourite.  The first time I’d looked through it with Wilder he’d relayed all the details.  The fact that he’d planned it all and surprised me had made me laugh.  Knowing what a control freak I am, I’m sure I’d had a mini freak out on the day … but I couldn’t deny everything had looked perfect in the pictures and I’d looked blissfully happy and so in love with the man who is my husband.  

At the very thought of hime, my heart breaks and I slowly trace my fingers over his handsome face that is smiling up at me from the picture, while my other hand wipes away the tears that trickle down my cheek.  

My heart breaks for that man every single day.  Although I’m sure he’d deny it, I felt like his hope was slowly fading. The confidence that had been in his eyes those first couple of days, that my memories would return, seemed to be slowly fading.  I wanted to reassure him that things were coming back to me but I couldn’t.  I couldn’t lie to him or give him false hope. The longer it went on, the more worried I became that my memories were lost forever and I think he was afraid of that too.

Mom had tried convincing me that, when the time came, when  I was released from hospital, I should go and live with her and dad, but I’d refused.  My place was with Wilder and when I left hospital I’d be going home with my husband. Although my brain didn’t remember him before this week, my body clearly did.  I was attracted to him, for sure.  From the aftershave he wore, to his whispered words of comfort, or his smirk when he clearly remembered something while looking ar the pictures with me.  Even if he wasn’t already mine, I’d have wanted to be his.  I found myself staring at him, a lot.  Every time it came to saying goodbye and good night, he kissed my forehead and I found myself wanting him to kiss my lips.  I felt comfortable with him and so unbelievably safe.  Being with him felt natural.  I was sure that my best chance of remembering things, or jogging those missing memories, would be to go home to (un)familiar surroundings and settle back into my life, not be separated from him.

I turn the page on of the photo album and stop. It’s my favourite picture.  Our first dance.  Wilders forehead is touching mine, our eyes are locked and we’re smiling at each other. The look I can only describe as love. My heart hurts and I rub my temples. I want to remember that moment. I want to remember what we had just said. I close my eyes and silently beg my self to remember … to remember any little detail but of course I don’t.  I’m hit with another wave of frustration. My eyes fly open and I grab the album, launching it across the room as I scream as loud as I can … then I close my eyes once more and cry ... a lot.

[lalast0ne]

"I don’t remember”

He’s there one minute and gone the next. He thinks no one sees him because everyone is focused on me, but I see him. My eyes don’t leave his face until he’s gone. The pain he failed to hide, as he backed up to the door and slipped from the room, nearly ripped my heart out.  I wanted to call him back but I couldn’t get the words out.

Instead I turn to my family for answers “Who is that man?” My speech is a little slurred and slow but that’s not what’s worrying my parents, I can tell. They look at each other then back to me. But it’s Ruby who speaks first, her brows pulled together as she grabs my hand “Layla .. that’s Wilder. That’s your husband.”

I take a slow breath in exasperation. I don’t need her sense of humour right now “That’s not funny, Ruby.”

She continues to stare at me, her teeth biting the inside of her cheek. I look to my parents, who give me a sympathetic look, my Mom nodding her head in silent confirmation, and panic starts to set in. “My husband? I’m married?” Ruby lifts my hand to me and I look down, spotting the rings sitting on my third finger. Confirmation that what she’s telling me is true.  “I ... I don’t .. remember.” I can feel my eyes filling with tears “Why don’t I remember?”

I look back to the door when it opens and feel a sense of disappointment when a man in awhite overcoat walks in 

“Welcome back, Layla. How are you feeling? Any nausea or vomiting? Have you tried moving your toes and -“

My Dad cuts him off “Doc. Layla is having trouble remember certain things. Is it normal for patients in this situation to experience memory loss?” 

“Memory loss is very common Mr. Stone in situations like these. Layla’s body has been through a traumatic experience and, a lot of the time, the brain can shut down that memory...” I zone out from the rest of the conversation, my eyes closing until the doctor leaves. All I can think about is the man who left the room and how much I want him back here. Wilder. My husband. God, that sound odd saying that. 

The door open once more and this time I’m not disappointed. He stands in silence for a few seconds, teetering on the threshold of the room with a cup of water in hand, then he seems to compose himself.  My eyes stay firmly fixed on his as he approaches me and speaks “I’m your husband, Little ball of Fire and we are going to get through this together.” I watch as he laces our fingers and I believe him, completely.

This man may be a stranger to me, at the moment, .. but something deep within me already has me feeling like I know him better than anyone else in the room .. and that I can trust him completely.

[lalast0ne]

The Stranger

There’s been a steady flow of human traffic thru my room since I woke or at least, became responsive. I can hear it all perfectly fine but I can’t verbally respond to it. 

I’ve listened to the conversations and from what I’m understanding it‘s perfectly normal for patience, who’ve been in a coma, to have a delay in opening their eyes after initially waking. For now my family had to make do with the tiniest flicker of a facial expression or a slight hand movement which, after hours, days or weeks of nothing, they seem more than happy with. 

The sound of your Mom crying is not something anyone likes to hear but I’d had to lay helpless when she’d burst into tears after being told I was awake and responsive. I knew they were happy tears but still ...

My Sister had been at my side immediately sobbing her apologies and my Dad had placed a kiss on my forehead and told me he loved me. I wanted to speak to every single one of them but my strength had been none existent. 

I don’t know how long I’ve been here like this, but I do know since I’d become aware of my surroundings, there’s been one constant. A deep voice that would make my toes curl if they could. Every now and then it whispers something to me and it makes me smile on the inside. I know my fingers are twitching because every time they do he asks me to do it again. To let him know I can hear everything he’s saying. So I do. 

He’s not always so sweet though .. at least not to the other people in the room. There’s frustration in his tone when someone new comes in and asks “how’s the patient doing?” and he snaps occasionally when he’s told to go home or to go and get some food. He refuses to leave my side and mumbles “I’m not going anywhere” as he places a kiss in my hair. I don’t know if he’s saying it to me or to my parents .. but it’s comforting. 

The room is silent right now apart from various rustlings of paper which indicate I’m not alone. I can feel myself waking from a sleep and my eyelids flicker.  I can do this .. I can ...

I shift on the bed and here my name. My eyes twitch and I squint a 

little then, ever so slowly, lift my eyelids.

“Oh my god. She’s opening her eyes! Pebble. Pebble that’s it.” There’s a shuffle of chairs and feet. My hands are squeezed from both sides and there’s his voice again  “That’s it baby. Open your eyes for us.”

So I do. I open them. Not fully at first but bit by bit, gradually allowing the light in. I wince in pain but persevere to allow my eyes to adjust, opening them a little more. My vision is blurry but slowly begins to focus. Smiling faces stare back at me, the light catches the glisten of tears rolling down their cheeks. I look around the room, smiling as best as I can whispering a croaky “Hi.” to everyone. Mom, Dad, Ruby and Cal all beam back but there’s someone else here, squeezing my hand so tight. I look to my side and there he is. That face I recognise so clearly now. The man, quite literally, of my dreams “It’s you.” He smiles at me and nods his head, bringing my hand to his lips and kissing my knuckle “Who are you?” ...

[lalast0ne]

Movement

Wilder

*I felt like I was going crazy and my eyes were playing tricks on me. These four white walls kept changing colors. Or maybe it was all the Christmas cheer happening around us. Anything to make the patients happy. I was holding Layla’s hand and listening to her dad give me the news of the day and telling me he was going to grab lunch for everyone. He walked out the door and I relished the quiet minus the beeping from the machines. It was a noise I had now grown used to. I had each machine memorized and knew what to look for in case a nurse was needed. Thankfully one was not needed often. That meant Layla

 was stable and the waiting game continued. A game that we were not going to lose. I set her hand back down on the bed and turn to grab the newspaper when the smallest movement catches my eye. I stare at Layla’s hand and pray this was not a trick and I had not gone off the deep end.* Do it again Little Ball of Fire.

Layla

*My scrunch my eyes, keeping them closed against the light that’s shining beyond my lids. It’s not blindingly bright but i can tell it’s bright enough. Bright enough to make me not want to open my eyes just yet.  Slowly I begin to feel my body as it awakens, the numbness wearing off and my senses returning. My hearing returns first .. the muffled sound of conversation becomes clearer .. I hear my dads familiar voice and smile .. or at least, I think I’m smiling. Then he’s gone. A warmth settles over my hand. But a quickly as it’s there, it’s disappears and I try to grab it back but with no success. There’s a rustle of something

and then that damn beeping sound right in my ear ... and then a voice. A velvet voice whispering something about fire in my ear. I try to move my hand again but it feels so heavy ... those words “do it again” feel like a challenge, so I do. I try to grab for the warmth again*

Wilder

*I kick the chair behind me as I stand up, lifting your hand again gently in mine. Cussing all the wires running everywhere on you the noise on one of the machines changes but my focus is on your hand. I stare and will your finger to move again.* Layla, can you hear me? *I move my eyes to your face. Your beautiful face. I see where it looks like movement behind your eye lids and your finger twitches in my hand.* Keep doing that baby. You are coming back to me.

Layla

*The warmth is back. I feel a gentle squeeze on my fingers and my body seems to relax, almost comforted. I frown slightly at your question, of course I can hear you. I want to tell you as much but it feels like an impossible task so instead, I squeeze your fingers as best I can.

There’s a mixture of emotion in your voice, I can hear it; panic, excitement, relief. Coming back? Where have I been? And where am I now?*

Wilder

*I keep your hand in mine, careful not to hurt you and reach across the bed to grab the call button. Pressing it over and over, I hope to annoy the nurse enough to get her ass in here quickly. I drop the button so it hangs off the edge of the bed and lean down to cup your face. Sill careful with your hand in mine, I move my thumbs across your skin, hoping it will be enough of a touch to get you to open your eyes.*

Layla

*The silence is broken by a soft voice asking if everything is ok. I hear your voice inform whoever is now in the room that I’ve been moving. My eyes are pulled open one by one and the brightest light shone in them causing me to twitch and grab the hand that’s holding mine. The female voice repeats my name, over and over as another someone enters and feet begin shuffling around the bed, speaking a load of medical talk.  I try to respond. I want to beg someone, anyone, to turn that god awful machine off but all I manage is a noise that i know I’ve never made before.*

Wilder

*I’m pushed away from you, forcing me to let go of your hand when the doctor comes in to examine you. They essentially speak in a foreign language which pisses me off.* Is my wife waking up? Is she going to be ok? *They go about ignoring me as they continue their examination.* “Mr. Steele, your wife is fighting off all the medicine. Her vitals are normal and it takes time to fully awaken after what her body has been through. You have to be patient.” *I growl low in my chest because patience and I do not get along. I have been patient for over two weeks and I want my wife back.*

Layla

*I couldn’t tell you how long I feel myself being tugged around and probed at; A thermometer under my tongue, a clip on my toe, my blood pressure taken. Numbers are read out and I hear a pen scribbling notes then something about getting a new bag for the drip. I zone in and out of the conversation going on between two people. She says something about patience ... and that doesn’t seem to go down well at all. That clearly wasn’t the answer he wanted to hear because he growls. He actually growls at her. I chuckle on the inside but on the outside I know my body remains unmoving apart from the rise and fall of my chest and the odd twitch of my fingers.*

Wilder

*The room clears after the doctor assures me this is all normal. I’m this close to grabbing him by the neck and forcing him to do something so you wake up fully. I look around and right the chair before sitting back down. I take your hand into mine for what feels like the millionth time. I lift your arm and lay my cheek on your hand, watching you like a hawk. Waiting for any small movements. Movements that give me hope all will return to normal and we will have our life back.

[lalast0ne]

The Dream

Just a little reminder for anyone that chooses to read it; The next part of our SL is done as though I am dreaming, while in a coma (have I mentioned that?) and Wilder and I have never met. 

And so it begins ...

Layla

My body jolts with a start and I fly back in my seat. Sitting upright and breathing heavy my eyes dart around the room, panic slowly dissipating as I take in the familiar surroundings of my office. My office .. with a sea of red roses littering every surface possible. Where did they come from? My eyes quickly scan the bouquets for sight of a card but I can’t see one. This feels wrong. All of it. And what the hell is that loud bleeping sound? I look around for the source but come up empty handed, then as if by magic it fades and I’m left in silence. An eerie kind of silence where all you can hear is your heartbeat in your ears. 

Why am I here? I don’t remember being here ... but then I can’t seem to remember much. It’s all familiar but feels wrong somehow. Have I been drinking? I don’t think I have but surely that’s the only explanation for this woozy sensation i’m feeling.  

“Wakey wakey, my darling Pebble. You’re needed.” My eyes land on the doorway where the owner of the sweetest voice stands. I smile big but my Nana remains unmoving. She has a sad look on her face which causes my lips to pull down into a frown. “I’m awake Nana. I don’t know what happened.” She stays where she is and just smiles at me, nodding at something .. I don’t know what ... then her head tips to the side and she sighs “Your family need you, Layla. He needs you.” I rise up from my chair “He? Dad? I’ll go see him now.”

I walk to the door and she steps aside to let me thru, her hand coming to my face as she smiles fondly “I’ll be back in a bit, Nan” Her arms wrap around me, pulling me into a tight squeeze, that I can barely

feel, as she whispers softly “There’s no rush, sweetheart. He needs you.”

I pull back, slightly bemused and give one final smile before turning away to walk towards my Dads office. When I look back, my office doorway is empty.  

This place, The Gentleman Club, feels different. Familiar yet unfamiliar. Like I don’t belong here.  And there’s that annoying bleeping noise again! 

I close my eyes and rub my throbbing temple willing the god awful sound to stop and, once again, it does.  My body relaxes slightly and my eyes open to a completely different sight that I’d closed them to.  

I look down at my fingers as the final note of music, from the piano, rings out around the empty room and my shoulders sag. Music is my release and I feel I needed it tonight, more than ever. My head falls backwards as I concentrate on my breathing and remember the sea of roses in my office. Roses I’d thrown out on the street because I didn’t want them and they shouldn’t be there. Not a single petal of them. 

In a club that had CCTV cameras covering every area of the premises and an entire security team regularly sweeping the hallways, I was at a complete loss how someone had not only managed enter the club but also managed to fill my office with hundreds of flowers, completely unnoticed. 

In silence I snap the Fall back into place, masking the fact the piano was ever played, and slip my heels back on my feet. 

According to the clock by the bar, the club had closed hours a go. Nana must have left already because if she was here she’d have been sat watching me play. And I knew the last employee wouldn’t have been far behind the last member ... they never were.

Not me though. I chose to stay. As I exit the Lounge, I gather my purse which is sitting in the bar and flick the lights off, plunging the room into darkness. 

The building is eerily silent and I head to the back exit as quickly as possible because I don’t want to be here. Tonight is the first time ever I’ve felt uneasy. I want to be home in my safe haven. 

I make quick work of setting the alarm and exit the building, stepping immediately into the private, secured, parking lot. 

There are various cars left here overnight by members who have drunk too much. It appears even criminals have a conscience at times. My laugh at my own joke catches in my throat when something catches my attention. 

A noise. A scuffling that’s so loud in the silence. I hold my breath. I’m not one 

to panic but if someone can get into the building, I’m sure they could get into the car park 

“Hello? Is someone there?” I scan the cold concrete area before me, biting the inside of my cheek, and wait for a response ... but it doesn’t come. I take a step forward and freeze again, my head snapping to the left when I hear the same noise once again. “Hello?” I release my breath and roll my eyes at my stupidity as a lone rat scurries across the floor, one side of the lot to the other. 

Reaching for my keys, I curse myself for being so silly because there’s no possible way anyone could get in here, it was like Fort Knox, but still, my confident strut turns to a brisk walk towards the safety of my car.

Wilder

*The dark of night beckoned me from my car as I became invisible mixing in with the drunks falling from bars and stumbling down the sidewalks. I kept my head down to the ground, my boot crushing red roses. I stopped for a minute, getting pushed by a drunk when I blocked his path. Red roses, on a sidewalk in the dead of night. Someone’s night was ruined. I picked one up before my boot crushed it and stalked into the parking garage. The lights were low, shielding me from camera’s. A rat trailed the stench of trash and I followed it. A lamb being led to slaughter but not this lamb. I shoved the rose in my back pocket and pulled my black gloves on, cracking my knuckles. My head popping both sides, loosening up my joints. I wound around the bottom level of the garage, a crowd circling in front of me. I was right on time for the main event. I took in all the faces, eyes glued to the teenager. He reminded me of myself, the parts of myself left buried years ago. He should not be here. If he wanted to get his dick wet in street fighting, it would not come from my hands. I would not pound my fists into his face and draw his blood. He could learn elsewhere. I step into the center of the crowd, my opponent unaware and slam one fist into his ribs and catch his face with my other fist when he turns. I play by no rules, fearful of nothing. My life died years ago. Blood sprays across the crowd as I break his nose, landing punch after punch. Ribs crack, a sound I’m familiar with. I’ve lost count of how many I’ve broken. I show no mercy to my opponent. His back hitting the concrete with force as I slam his head down. A fight to the death. I’m pulled off his lifeless body and cock my fist to hit the idiot who touched me and stop when I stare back in that boys eyes. He pulls my attention away long enough for the crowd to disperse, a ringing echoing filling the garage. Someone pulled the alarm and cops will swarm shortly. I grab him by the back of the neck and we escape the garage from the back, leaving one dead body behind. Death coming again by my hands. The kid runs the opposite direction and I pocket my gloves, the rose falling to the ground. I scrub my hands down my face and stare into the dark of night. I step into the street and face the oncoming lights, arms stretched wide. My face turns up to the sky and I wait for death to rain down on me. And I wait.*

Layla

He appears from nowhere. A faceless figure dressed head to toe in black. He’d blend in beautifully with the night if he wasn’t caught in my headlights.  I have no clue what he’s doing but he clearly has a death wish. I was certain he’d move when he heard my car engine approach but he doesn’t. Instead he stands motionless, with his arms outstretched to the sides, looking up at the dark sky. 

The sound of my horn has no effect as he remains in his trance, so I swerve at the last minute and slam on my breaks. He doesn’t even acknowledge me when I undo the window. It’s as though I’m not here, even when I scream obscenities at him. 

With a huff, I close the window and carry on, suddenly no clue where I’m actually going. A tutting sound pulls my eyes to the right and I feel the corners of my lips pull upwards at the words that spill from the mouth of the innocent looking woman beside me “Idiot. Deserves a slap round the chops. Maybe that would have knocked some sense into him.” I chuckle at my Nana and glance over from the passenger seat.  It doesn’t occur to me to question how she got there, it’s just nice that she is. 

Night turns to day in the blink of an eye but I don’t feel tired. Did I even sleep? 

I’m sat at my desk once more, my fingernails drum rhythmically against my desk as I sit in my otherwise silent office. 

I can hear the life of the club on the other side of the heavy oak door. I should show my face but I have zero desire to leave this room.  There’s an uneasy feeling in the air and I shift uncomfortably in my chair..  while I sit and wait patiently for my package to arrive. My mind flashes back to the million roses that I’d murdered early this morning. They’d been swept up by the time I’d arrived, I’d checked but now I wanted to see when they’d arrived.

A heavy knock on the door has my shoulder snapping back. He’s here. As soon as I give the okay the door swings open 

and the large ape-like frame that is Daryl, my head of security, walks in and closes the door securely behind himself. “Do you have it?” Daryl nods silently and hands over the disc without word. My eyes flicker between him and the item I’m holding several times. “I told you not to watch it. So naturally you did?” Again, he nods silently and takes a seat as I sit forward in mine.

“Did you see anything?” 

He clears his throat before speaking and shakes his head “Yes but you can’t see a face. Layla, anyone who comes, uninvited, on or into property belonging to your father is either fucking crazy or fucking stupid.” He checks his watch before continuing and points at the disk in my hand “Fast forward to about 10pm.  You’ll see.  I didn’t watch much past that but the street view camera is on there too.  If your Dad finds out what happened I’m not lying to him Layla.” Now it’s my turn to nod in silence. I can’t say I expected anything different. Daryl’s worked with my father for years and is an extremely loyal employee.

“Fine. But if he doesn’t ask, you don’t tell him. He’s got stuff going on, he doesn’t need to be burdened with something that’s potentially nothing.” I can see he’s struggling with keeping this from my dad but that’s exactly why I told him to not look at the footage. Without another word he leaves, closing the door behind him, and I pop the disk in to my pc, waiting patiently for it to load. 

I recommence the tap of my fingers against my desk as the footage comes up on my monitor, a split screen of 6 cameras. I forward to the time recommended and watch as someone pulls up outside the club then rapidly begins unloading vase after vase of roses. Of course Daryl was right.  No matter when I pause the disk, it’s no use. The person never looks up and seems to know exactly where the camera’s are, taking special care to pull their cap down. As soon as the last vase is delivered they’re back in the van and gone from sight.

I speed the footage up, watching the minutes then hours pass quickly, on the time stamp, in the corner of the screen. The van never returns and I don’t see anyone lurking around on the outer premises so assume the individual doesn’t come 

back … unless he’s a member of the club.

I continue to watch as the footage goes into the early hours of the morning, to the time I prepared to leave the club, then slow it to a normal speed once more.  I lean in a little closer and watch as a form appears in the top frame, from the camera located out the front of the building.  The boots indicate it’s a man. I can’t make out his face, but something seems familiar about him, as he bends down and picks up a single rose. Then seems to vanish. I rewind and pause, leaning right in to try and see, my eyes narrowing.  It’s definitely the idiot that I nearly mowed down in my car. The man with no face and no name.

Wilder

*I woke before the sun and pull myself from bed, the house eerily quiet. A quiet I lived for but today I wished for my mind to be head banging like it was at a heavy metal concert. Noise I actually craved but all that faced me was silence. I forego my usual coffee and leave my house through the back door. I needed to make one stop before visiting her. I enter the bakery a few minutes later and pick up my standing weekly order. Coffee with too much sugar and a dozen donuts, pink icing staring back at me. Heavy steps carry me along the tree line until I come to an opening, the bright sun beaming down. I set the coffee cup on the headstone, crushing two donuts and leave the rest for her. I take a deep breath, rock back on my heels and before I can speak a memory overtakes me.....

I turn my head to the left as the wind picks up, right on time, my eyes focused in the distance, a horror film playing this time. Slow motion. I see her running towards me but her legs are moving like trapped in quicksand. Her dress in shreds, hanging from her body like it had been through war and she lost. I clench my fists, shaking my head, wanting this film to end but it won't. I race to get to her, her eyes void of any life. She's mumbling something over and over that I can barely make out. And that's when I hear it, the words no woman should ever say..."I told him no." I  scoop her into my arms, cradling her against my chest, all innocence stripped from her at the age of 15.....

My sister gone from this earth and the only thing I can do is remember and come here to tell her about my life. Anger boils inside me. I don’t want to be here but someone keeps saving me. I punch the tree, pain radiating up my arm but it’s a pain that no longer registers. I’m past the point of pain and caring. I step out of the ring of sun and jack the first car that comes into view. Today I only want to hurt myself. I slam my foot down on the gas, the car takes off and reaches over 100 mph. I feel free for the first time in years. Today is the day. I see my out. My salvation. My freedom. 

I take my hands from the wheel and wait for the impact. I crave the pain that is coming. The tires burn when I push the car past the speed it was built for. I don’t brace as the concrete wall comes into view. Silence again jars my mind, the wheel spinning, steering the car from the path I had it on and flips onto its side. Sliding until my foot lifts from the gas to the brake. Hot tears break. My soul damned to to this fucking earth.*

Layla

Something has me feeling harassed and uneasy.  I can’t put my finger on it. I’m finding it incredibly hard to sit still and almost impossible to concentrate on anything. 

The same four walls, after however many hours, is enough to drive the most sane person crazy. And I feel like I’m now at that stage.  I don’t quite understand why but I know I’m not supposed to be here, at the Club.  It just feels wrong. I’ve checked my diary to make sure I don’t have an appointment somewhere else, but nothing. Yet, still, the niggling feeling persisted.  

I need to escape.  I need fresh air or maybe I need a coffee … or a donut. Or both. Caffeine and sugar are most peoples friends and I’m definitely no exception.  I practically salivate at the thought.

“Maybe you should go for a drive?” A smile spreads across my lips at the sound of her voice. There she is again.  Standing in the doorway unwrapping one of her sweets, that she always carries in her purse, and pops it in her mouth, giving me a cheeky wink as she does.

“A drive?” I let my head fall back against my chair and look at the ceiling.  “I think I’m too busy for that Nan.” 

“Doesn’t look like you’re very busy to me at all, Pebble. You should leave this place before you become a part of it.” My body shakes with laughter and my head snaps forward.  I’m just about to say that I am already a part of it, when I pause abruptly, my eyes darting from left to right.  There’s that damn beeping sound again.  

My brows pull together and I groan as I open and close my desk drawers in frustration trying to find the source of the annoying sound, once more “Can you hear 

that?!”

Nan copies my moves. Looking from left to right then back to me “I can’t. But I’m glad you can.” Slowly the noise fades and I shake my head.

“A drive, you say?  A drive might be a very good idea.” I push up from my chair and grab my car keys, smiling as I walk around my desk, grabbing my keys, and stop in the doorway “You coming?” 

I watch as my Nana reaches into her bag, then pulls her hand out and places something in my hand, closing my fingers around it “Something for the trip.  No, I won’t come this time.  You go where the mood takes.”

I open my hand up and smile at the sweet she’s placed in my palm. It’s the bright orange, aniseed one.  The sweet that no one else, except me and Nan, would touch. I grin at her as I unwrap it “I’ll be back soon.”

“Not too soon, sweetheart. Take your time.” I cuddle her quick, getting another tight squeeze in return. “I love you Nana.”

“I know, Pebble.  I love you too.”

Wilder

*My body was battered but my mind was clear as the cloudless sky, the sun beating down on me. I had to shield my eyes from the glare and I could feel the disappointment. At this point, I didn’t fucking care. I kick the glass bottle at my feet, launching it in the air and wait for the glass to shatter when it hits the concrete. I launch another glass bottle into the air, this time tipping my head back to down the last of my beer. I lost count of the number I had consumed after number five but from the looks of the broken glass surrounding me, I’m surprised I could stand upright. Every care in my world was gone. Every dark thought was now consuming me. I was past the point of no return and waiting for my demons to extinguish my light. I stumbled away from the wrecked car, leaving more destruction in my wake and headed in a direction I should know. But my mind was too foggy to remember. I carried the last two beer bottles, one in each hand. Arms outstretched like they were my anchor weighing me down. I was following the noise., the drum beat in my head leading me into the unknown. I bring the bottle of beer to my mouth, poison coursing my veins at the sight in front of me. Fucking butterflies. Her peace. My nightmare. The tribute to my sister and a reminder that she is no longer here. I want it gone. I can’t claw her memory from my mind but I can eliminate everything about around me to remember her. I take off running at full speed, crashing to the ground before I take out her butterfly house. Fucking angel ruining every path and every try I attempt to rid myself from this earth. I slam my last bottle of beer to the ground and somehow make it my feet, stumbling away as the butterflies take flight. If only they could escape as well but they are caged in their house the same way I am caged inside my mind. The sun beats down hotter, stars coming at me at lightening speed. I count my steps, the noises inside me quieting.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five just out of reach as my boots fail me and my body hits the dirt.*

Layla

I pull my car over to the sidewalk just as it judders to a standstill. The engine completely cuts out and refuses to start again, even after several attempts. I remove the key from the ignition and blow it (because a dusty key is clearly the issue) but instead of going on my merry way, I’m left staring blankly at the dashboard that is now lit up like a Christmas tree. Typically, the only warning light I do recognise is the only one that isn’t flashing at me. Killing the battery, I reach across for my bag and rummage around to locate my phone. Unsuccessfully. I can fully understand why men get so frustrated at having to retrieve anything from a woman’s handbag. For someone who’s generally quite organized, mine really is full of crap. Turning my bag upside down and emptying the entire contents on the passenger seat, I blink in confusion. It’s not here. I never go anywhere without my phone. It’s my lifeline. I check my empty bag again just in case, with no success. Shit. Sighing, I sit back in my seat and unclip my belt. I have no clue where I am; 40 minutes a go I got into my car and decided i was going for a drive to distance myself from .. well .. from everything and this is where I’ve ended up. A small town. The houses that I’ve seen are so far removed from what I’m used to in the city. They actually have front gardens. Up ahead of me, about 100 yards, I can see a row of shops with a few trucks parked out front. That’s my destination. They’ll definitely have a phone I can use to call Ruby to come get me from here, when I find out where ‘here’ is. I grab my purse and hold my keys out behind me, locking the car, as I head toward the destination.

The streets are deserted which could possibly be a little odd for this time of day but still I continue.  My heels clicking along the sidewalk.  I peer in the shops one by one as I pass them, making a mental note to return to the shoe shop, then come to a stop at the Cafe. Regardless of the trucks parked outside, there’s no sign of life in there. I try the door handle, giving a couple of hard pushes and even knock on the door to get anyones attention, huffing when it remains firmly shut. Where the 

hell is everyone?

With my back against the door, I look to the left, at the direction I just came from, and then to the right.  I already know that that’s the direction I’m going .. I can’t practically feel myself being pulled there by some invisible force.

The sun beats down on my face and I have to remove my cardigan as I begin to walk.  Some people appear up ahead but even when I call to them, they don’t acknowledge me. Instead they carry on across the road and vanish as quickly as they’d appeared.

I turn the corner, feeling like I’ve walked these streets a hundred times already.  Familiarity creeping in with every step I take and still no clue why.  The concrete path underfoot turns into a dirt track and suddenly I’m surrounded by trees. A forest. The birds overhead sing a tune which sounds a little like bleeping and I shake my head, convinced I’m now going crazy. The woods .. The woods.  What’s so special about the woods?

A noise ahead grabs my attention. I don’t know why I follow it, it could be a murderer for all I know, but I can’t stop my feet.  They’re taking me towards the sound before I can think of stopping them and … there he is. Again. 

The man with no face. I watch in silence as he counts out steps, each step a little wobblier than the last.  One minute he’s upright and then he’s face down. He goes down with such a force it makes me wince and then I’m next to him. Crouched on my knees and using every bit of strength I possess to turn him over.

The man with no face has a face after all.

The birds singing becomes louder but it’s not a normal bird song. I close my eyes against the pain and cover my ears but I can still hear it .. that damn bleeping .. getting louder and louder….

[lalast0ne]

Killer coffee

Layla

For the first time in forever, I hadn’t spent Thanksgiving with my parents.

With me still refusing to see or talk to Ruby, I’d made the decision that it would be best to stay home with Wilder and Jake, my little family, just the three of us. The fact we hadn’t stayed at home but ventured to the club, to eat dinner with hundreds of other people, was by the by. 

Mom had about had a breakdown when I’d told her. Her insistence that we “had to go” had just made me dig my heels in even more. Dad had been disappointed but had understood, eventually, when I’d said I didn’t want to ruin the holiday for anyone and I wasn’t about to force myself in to a situation that I just wasn’t ready to face either. 

I knew it was getting to the point I needed to suck it up. My ignoring Ruby had probably gone on long enough and I couldn’t let it go one forever.  Truth be told, I missed my sister. 

Wilder and I had made the decision to open the restaurant on Thanksgiving and it was a decisions I don’t regret at all.   It was a little surprising how many families were wanting to eat out and the price they were willing to pay for a three course meal.  Even with the staff overheads, paying the triple time as a good gesture for working, we had come out in a pretty decent position. The two sittings through the day meant that we had fed close to 400 people.

As soon as Thanksgiving is done, we enter silly season.  Christmas spirit hd a lot to answer for.  People used it as an excuse to get drunk, be merry and spend a fortune. Anyone and everyone who walked thru the doors of The Steele Cage was no exception.

I browse the bookings for the next week with a huge grin, clicking away on the mouse as I start shifting parties around like a game of tetras to see if we can accommodate anyone else.  We’re fully booked.

“It’s no good. I’ve tried.” I look over my shoulder at the owner of the voice and chuckle “Several times in fact.” James, the new restaurant manager, smiles as he makes his way round the bar then tackles the coffee machine as I turn back at my screen and resume clicking while I mumble to myself “There’s got to be one more table here somewhere.” He laughs placing the perfect cappuccino in front of me “Here. Try this.  A new supplier has been on my case for weeks trying to get a foot in the door.  He stopped by this morning and dropped off some samples for us to try.  Was real insistent that management try them.” I roll my eyes, lifting the drink to my lips and blowing the steam from the surface as I climb from my chair, snapping my laptop closed with the other hand. 

I have no desire to change my supplier yet.  I get a reasonable price on amazing quality coffee but, a little taste test doesn’t hurt anyone “Fine, I’ll try.  But you already know my answer.”

James nods in agreement, laughing as he starts pulling glasses from the washer, calling after me as I head out “I know, I know. I made no promises.”

“Good! Because we don’t make promises we can’t keep. I’ll be in the office if you need me.”

Wilder

*Holidays come and go, not fast enough in my opinion. Everything was so commercialized these days. You couldn’t even enjoy one without the next holiday ruining the day. I’m not a fan of any of them but my wife.....and I will deny if asked, as made it so I enjoy one or two of them. Thanksgiving being one of them. Who does not enjoy a day with lots of food and maybe family? Especially when you like your family. It’s not something I’m used to. But this year has been different. Two stubborn and yes I said it, sisters will not talk to each other and I was deprived cannoli pie. A staple her mother makes for me after my first time being invited into their house. Cannoli pie. Need I say more. 

I stalk into the club with Killer right behind me and ignore the look James gives me. He knows better than to utter one word in my direction. He gave off a vibe that pissed me off. I did not want to hire him but Layla and Salem would not stop going on and on about him. I prayed he would have some dirt in his past that I would dig up on his background check but he slid through with not even a speck. Asshole. I was highly disappointed that James was squeaky clean and now was an employee. More than employee. A manager. I ignored his stares and looked around the restaurant, going behind the bar to make sure everything that was ordered had arrived. This was Layla’s domain but I loved to rile her up by moving things around. I knew exactly what was ordered and when any delivery was made. I grab a bottle of water and notice a different brand of coffee or that fancy shit they make, on the bar. I pick up the box, Killer running ahead of me to the office. I drop the box on the couch and glare at my dog as he is all over Layla. I push her chair away from the desk and plant myself between her and Killer, leaning down and bite her neck.* I thought we agreed to fire James. He screwed up this week’s order. *Killer now sniffing the screw up in question.*

Layla

*a smile tugs at my lips when I hear the familiar stamp of boots coming along the corridor and the jingle of a chain. I knew this would be a problem. Your dislike of James is something I still can’t fathom and I have no intention of firing him simply because you don’t like him. The annoyance in your voice is apparent with the first word spoken and refuse to look up, making a fuss of the pup as his head lands in my lap, until I have no choice. With a swift bite of my neck, you pull back to look at me, a serious look on your face* No. You made it Known that you don’t like him. We never agreed to fire him and I’m certainly not getting rid of him because he’s under ordered a couple of times. *I reach past you   to grab my coffee, smiling sweetly as my lips wrap over the rim of the cup* It’s coming into a busy time, baby. Firing him and trying to retrain someone else in December would be a terrible idea.

Wilder

Under ordered? *I take your coffee cup from you and set it on the desk.* He over ordered and this is not the first time I have found extra fancy coffee shit. Does he have trouble with numbers? I will gladly send him back to elementary school. All expenses paid if he needs to learn to count. They even make a TV program for it. It has that huge ass bird and trash can grump on it. The bitch used to make me watch it. At least she was good for something.

Layla

*My eyebrows pull together and reach for my coffee again, draining the cup, as I point to the box that Killer is currently is sniffing around* That wasn’t an order. That was dropped off by a vendor who is hoping to get on our list of suppliers. *I slap my lips together at the overly bitter, metallic taste that costs my tongue. I’m no coffee snob but that is vile* but we definitely won’t be using them. *I give a small shudder, lifting the cup once more and sniffing, shaking my head as I put it back on my desk* That’s the worst coffee I’ve ever had.

Wilder

LAYLA ROSE STEELE! *I come out of my chair when I hear your words and grab the coffee cup from you. I watch it shatter into pieces.* Every vendor and supplier we use, I run a background check on. The company, owners and employees. I know where they get their vehicles from. I do it to protect me but especially know to protect you. *Killer starts clawing at the box.* People would love to get to me which makes you an easy target.

Layla

*My jaw ticks at your overreaction. My eyes shifting between you and the mug which is now shattered all over the floor.* That was my favourite mug *If you were a cartoon character there would be steam coming from your ears right now. Your nostrils are flared and your stare down is only broken by Killer who is about to rip the box of coffee* Please stop him. I don’t want to have to clean up coffee beans too! *I rise up from my seat and head to the closet to retrieve the dustpan and brush. You don’t say a word but I can feel your eyes burning into my back as I bend down and start cleaning the mess. Only when I’m finished do I stand, with a slight wobble, dump the shattered mug in the bin and sigh as I meet your gaze* I’m sorry. But it’s just coffee. Disgusting too. So I’ll tell James to say thanks but no thanks. Ok?

Wilder

James gave you that cup of coffee? That same James who over ordered and is now fired? *Killer tears the box open, his bark alerting me.* Killer is trained to protect us and to know when something is present that shouldn’t be. *I grab him by the collar as he takes off to sniff the shattered cup, his barks coming even louder* Layla, drink my bottle of water NOW!

Layla

*I watch as the dog tears the box. Even when you’re shouting at me with the order to drink water, all I can think about is the mess currently spilt all over the floor.* Wilder, you’re over reacting. I’m fine. *I grab your bottle of water and hold it up to you, then take a large gulp, suddenly really thirsty.* Please stop him barking. I’m getting a headache. *I drain the rest of your bottle then reach into my own bag for the one I brought with me from home*

Wilder

I’m not overreacting. *I go through the contents of the box, lifting up the package of coffee to my nose.* This coffee is laced with something strong. *My heart drops as I whip my head around, Killer standing over you when you hit the floor.* FUCK! *I race over, dropping to my knees and cradle your head in my hands. I watch your eyes blink open and closed.* Layla, baby, stay with me. *I hear Salem at the door and yell at her to call 911 and Kingston. I lift you into my arms and listen to your heartbeat.*

Layla

*Its the strangest sensation washing thru me. I can hear you saying my name. Hear you telling me to stay with you, but I can respond. I force my eyes open again, looking at you. You have panic written all over your face. I know you’re going to be so angry with me when I snap out of whatever is happening to me. My sight starts to blur and my eyes roll back.  I hear you shout, I hear commotion and screaming and then I hear .... nothing.*

[lalast0ne]

Not today, Satan

My phone ringing isn’t uncommon. It rings constantly thru the day but this call carries a picture with it. A picture of a face I don’t want to see. I watch as the device flashes but don’t make a move to answer it. Instead I’m immediately, and thankfully, distracted by the familiar scent of aftershave that drifts into the room. A scent I’d be able to pick out anywhere ... My husbands aftershave. I close my eyes and inhale, a smile tugging the corners of my mouth.

“That was quick. I wasn’t expecting ...” I open my eyes and the words die on my lips. It’s not Wilder dancing on the threshold of my office, it’s someone who is about as welcome as the person trying to reach me by phone. 

Naz points at the device which continues to vibrates across my desk and I look back down at the paper work which is spread out in front of me, his words breaking the silence between us “Are you not going to get that?” 

“No, I am not. And if I’d known you were going to just show up I’d have locked the door.”

The silence sets in once more as my anger, which I’d thought was beginning to subside, begins to rise to the surface. Naz moves into my office, walking cautiously towards me, but I refuse to look at him.

“You need to speak to her you know. It’s been weeks.”

I flick the page, pretending to be immersed in the words on the paper when in reality I have no clue what I’m not ready, and speak slowly “I didn’t realise there was a set time frame that I was allowed to be angry and when I was supposed to have forgiven her, or you, by.”

“I’m sorry.” His voice is exasperated which fuels my annoyance more. I sit up straight and remain silent for a moment, my pen tapping against my desk in agitation as I look at the man standing before me. The man that, once upon a time, I’d have done anything for. I drop the pen and shake my head, my laugh catching him off guard. “You’re sorry. What are you sorry for Naz? Sorry that you fucked my sister while we were dating? Sorry that you dropped it on me like an atomic bomb? Or sorry that you are quite a major part in screwing over the relationship of two sisters?”

He looks down at his feet, rock from toe to heel uncomfortably for a few seconds before looking back up and meeting my unwavering gaze. “All of it. I’m so sorry. It just happened. You and I were in a bad place, constantly arguing. Ruby was just ... there. I’d never looked at her that way before and then we kissed .. it just happened-”

I hold my hand up, stopping him mid speech. A speech I’m sure he’s practised many times but a speech I have no desire to listen to “Naz, please just go. You coming here today does not serve any other purpose than to piss me off even more.” My voice is firm. There’s no wiggle room her and he knows it “I’ll speak to you both when I’m goddamn ready.” I watch as he turns his back on me, exiting the door he’d walked thru only minutes before, not uttering another word. 

[lalast0ne]

Threats

Wilder

*I call for Killer as he sniffs around an empty building and then proceeds to get scared of a leaf, shaking my head at my protective dog.* Let’s go home boy. *He runs ahead of me and I turn my head back when I sense something. A feeling like the ground shifting under my feet.  A feeling I can’t shake that puts me on high alert. I keep my eyes drifting from side to side, Killer barking at wind and jumping at more leaves. I turn the corner to head home and see Layla standing outside, the trunk of her car open and it all comes together. A feeling of my credit card being wiped clean. My back pocket lighter. I cage my arms around her before she can turn around.* Little Ball of Fire, we’ve talked about this.

Layla

*The coast was clear. I’d checked and double checked to make sure he was NO WHERE around or even close. Those familiar arms cage me in and my back straightens as it presses against a broad chest. I don’t know how the hell does it. My lips pull up into a smirk and I release all the bags, dropping my not so secret purchases back in the trunk of my car and turn to face you* We have ... and I did take everything you said onboard. I’ve just not necessarily started abiding by these new rules that you’ve insisted on putting in place. *I lean in to brush My lips against yours* And, as always, I’ve tried hard to ensure you benefit from everything I’ve brought too ...

Wilder

*I laugh against your lips and lift you up so you are in the trunk with all your bags of tricks and treats.* You are a rule breaker Fire and have been since day one. I think I need to take you forever a ride so you can think about your actions. *Smirking down at you, my hands go to close the trunk and shroud you in darkness.*

Layla

*My eyes go between you and the closing trunk door. My feet fly up to stop you from closing it fully and my eyes narrow playfully. Shaking my head from side to side I push up into a sitting position* Previous rides in the trunk have resulted in nice things happening ... If I let you shut me in here ... do I get something nice? *I settle back into my purchases, using them like cushions*

Wilder

I think you are riding with all your nice things. *Watches you get comfortable  and shuts the trunk closed, knocking on it as I round to the drivers side. Killer joins me on the passenger side and I pull away from our house and down the streets of BlackSoul. Weighing my options on if I should take you anywhere special or leave you locked in as punishment.*

Layla

*I lay for a few seconds in silence, laughing to myself at the joke ... and then I hear the driver door close and the engine start* WILDER!! WILDER STEELE! You let me out of here right now. *I wait to the engine to cut off but it doesn’t. Instead the car back out of the drive and I growl in frustration. A box digs me in the back as I try to get comfortable, wondering how long I’m going to be stuck in here this time and where, exactly, you’re taking me*

Wilder

*I turn the radio on, rolling down the window so Killer can get a cool breeze, circling the streets several times. I pass by the outskirts of town, where the opening of the Skids is and get that feeling of the ground shaking, a feeling a doom. Stopping the car, I get out so I can look around, Killer on my heels. Forgetting for a moment that you are in the trunk, I turn back quickly and pop it open, holding my hand over your mouth immediately so you don’t scream and lower my voice.* Not one word Fire. Somethings wrong.

Layla

*My eyes go wide when your hand covers my mouth. Panic momentarily setting in and the realisation I may have pushed to far this time. Am I in the woods? I look around as best possible, breathing again when I see there are no trees in view. I nod my head in silence and push up into a sitting position, my heart sinking slightly when I see where we are. Pulling your hand from my mouth, I’m unable to hide how unimpressed I am with the destination we’ve arrived at and I fix my gaze on you thru narrow eyes* This is not a nice treat *Ignoring your request for I silence, I mumble my displeasure as I climb from the car, using you as support, making sure to keep my voice low as I motion dramatically to the entrance.* Why are we here?

Wilder

Because something is wrong. *Turns to look at the entrance and then back to you as you are on the verge of throwing a shit fit. My eyes narrow to match yours.* Maybe I should have taken you to the woods but here we are. *Killer goes on high alert and I pull you to me, wrapping one arm around your waist and the other covering your mouth once again.* It looks like those heels are about to take a trip. *I push you forward as we walk.* We are going underground.

Layla

*I’m all for being bossed around and having my mouth covered in the right setting ... and this is not it. I roll my eyes and groan behind your hand, worrying more about my pretty heels than anything else as we edge forward to the entrance of the place I’d rather not venture into. Killer, up in front, darts one way then the other, looking back occasionally to check we’re still following him. I pull at your fingers, turning my head to look at you* Me and underground not friends *I gasp and stop from my foot lands in something wet and slimy my eyes travel down then back to your face  and my lips remain in a tight line* and if these shoes are ruined, me and you won’t be friends either, Steele.

Wilder

Promise? Why do you have heels on this time of morning anyways? *Not waiting for you to answer, I move ahead of you and once we are covered in the dark of the tunnels, I reach down and pull my knife from my boot. I can feel you behind me, with Killer at your side. Internally I cuss to myself about the shit storm we are able to walk into. Coming into Carlos’ territory without first asking permission. Not that I would have anyways. Finally we come into the light and find 4 sets of eyes staring back at us.*

Layla

*I roll my eyes again. You know me well enough by now to know that I wear heels regardless of what time of day it is. I jump slightly when you produce your knife, not entirely sure why I’m surprised to see it in your hand* Wilder, why are we ... *The words die on my lips and I blink rapidly as my eyes adjust to the sudden light and flick between the people now standing in front of us.*

Wilder

“Do what do we owe the pleasure Mr. and Mrs. Steele?”

*His voice automatically like a pig squealing and annoys the fuck out of me. The one man who I want to kill, yet I made a deal with.* I think I can visit anytime I want Carlos. You are in my town after all. *I can still sense something is off and take another step forward, pushing you and your men back. Killer stays on guard and I can smell something that doesn’t belong, more smells like the sewer rats. I feel you step from behind and grumble under my breath* Layla.....

Layla

*I step to the side a little more and break eye contact with the scruffy looking tall guy on the end who looks like he could use a good shower, my nose wrinkles when you say my name and I plaster a smile on my face, ignoring Carlos’ annoying face, turning to look at you.* Wilder ...

Wilder

*Killer goes to one spot, barking and my hand automatically comes around Carlos’ neck, slamming him against the wall.* I told you we would have no issues under two circumstances. No dead bodies in my town courtesy of you and no dealing the hard stuff. So tell me Carlos *I get right in his face* why did it feel like an earthquake hit earlier?

Layla

*I stand in silence watching you pin Carlos against the wall. I get a mild sense of satisfaction, watching him squirm when your hands tighten around his throat. My eyes move to the tall guy who takes a wrap toward you. Catching his eye, I shake my head from side to side, taking a stop forward myself* I wouldn’t .. *I don’t need to finish the sentence. He takes a step back and my attention goes back to you and the man you have held against the wall* What are you up to Carlos?

Wilder

Are you cooking meth down here where you could blow this place and innocent people up? *I cut off his air supply with my forearm adding pressure to his neck, his feet trying to kick at me.* I should end you right now in front of your loyal workers who won’t even help you. You are a disgrace to the underworld. *I drop him like a rag doll, swiftly kicking him in the ribs.* Clean your shit up yesterday, asshole.

Layla

*His body crumbles to the floor and I can’t even feel bad about it. This man has brought nothing but problems to this town and part of me wishes You would stick a knife in his gut and do us all a favour but a deal is a deal. I reach out for your arm, Carlos weak voice cutting thru the silence 

“I stick to my business and you stick to yours, Steele.”

*I reach for your hand and pull you back but look down at Carlos* When your business could potentially kill half the town, it become his business, you moron.

Wilder

*I take your hand, squeezing it as I call Killer back and we head towards the tunnels.* You have two days Carlos or our deal is off. You crossed the line for the last time. *I slide my knife back in my boot, hearing his words.*

“You will pay Steele.”

I should lock the tunnels and bury him alive. *We finally exit the Skids and are back above ground. I look down at your heels and try to calm the air.* Not one scratch Mrs. Steele.

Layla

*I shake my head when Carlos utters his words. He’ll never learn. The last thing he should be trying to do is antagonise my husband, yet he seems hell bent on doing so. I scent of the world tickles my nose and I breathe in the fresh air. My smile faltering slightly when I look down at my shoes. An eyebrow raised at the brown goo which covers one of my beautiful red shoes.* You got lucky, Mr Steele. Now, can we please get away from this disgusting place?

Wilder

Maybe I will replace them. *Smirks at you and pops the trunk of my car.* Get in baby girl and I will take you for a spin.

[lalast0ne]

Daddy’s girl

My dad has the ability to demand attention without uttering a single word. When silence falls amongst my staff, I look up from my position, propped at the bar, and stare in the general direction that everyone else seems to be looking. His face is stern as he scans the room, then breaks into the biggest smile when he sees me, his first born daughter. The room parts for him, creating a path that directly leads to me and I can’t help but smile back. 

“Pebble!” He embraces me in a tight hug and kisses my cheek before shrugging from his jacket “I’ll take a coffee when you have a moment Salem. Black, no sugar.” I smile a thanks as Salem totters off to fulfill Archie Stone’s request. 

“This is unexpected. To what do I owe the pleasure.” Dad looks around the room taking it all in then back to me.

“A father can’t come and see his daughter? Especially when she’s been avoiding him for weeks.”

I don’t blush. He’s right. I have been avoiding him .. avoiding them all. I’ve thrown myself into life with my own little family and ignored the family beyond my front door.

“I just don’t really have anything to say Dad. You and Mom lied to me.”

He thanks Salem when a coffee lands in front of him then turns his attention to me “We didn’t lie. We just withheld some of the truth from you for your own good and the good of your and Ruby’s relationship which I’ll admit was wrong.”

My eyebrows raise up my forehead “You should have told me, Dad.”

He places one of his large hands over mine and sighs “Yes, we should have and I know that but there was never a good time, Layla. When we found out, your mother and I gave Naz an ultimatum and he took the cowards way out. It took me a long time to forgive your sister for her betrayal.”

“What about Naz?” I sit back, looking at my Dad who shakes his head from side to side, eyes closing at the distant memory “He might make Ruby happy but he abandoned you when you needed him most. I’ll never truly forgive him for that.” He gives my hand a squeeze then continues talking “I know it’s a lot to ask but we’re having a family dinner tonight. Please come. Bring Wilder and Jake. Your mother is driving me crazy over this, she misses you so much and I want my girls talking again.”

I lean in to kiss his cheek “I’m sorry Daddy. I’m just not ready to see Ruby yet.”

He gives a soft laugh but there’s sadness behind it rather than amusement “My stubborn girl. You’re so like me, it’s scary.” Admitting defeat he stands taking me back into his arms for a tight hug which I return “Love you, baby. Please at least ring your Mom and get her off my back.”

It’s my turn to give a sad laugh, smooshing my face against his chest. I may be upset with him at the moment, but he’s my father “Love you too, Daddy. I’ll call her this weekend, I promise.”

[lalast0ne]

Fallout

It had taken half an hour for me to calm down.  By which time Salem, who’d seen and herd the entire thing, had come to the office to find me.  I’d eventually let her in and she’d handed me a generous tumbler of whiskey with the promise that she had things under control and that I should go home.

I’d been in bed by the time Wilder had got home.  I’d never needed a cuddle so much in my life and he delivered. My husband, knowing me so well, had asked what was wrong but I’d simply shaken my head and forced myself to go back to sleep. 

This morning my mood was somber. I’d ignored the countless calls that had come in to my cell apart from Wilder, who had taken Jake and the dogs for a long walk over the fields, and Salem to tell me what an amazing night the restaurant and club had had.

I grab myself a coffee and head out to the porch, taking my butt on the swing.  The warm August sun might not be on my skin but even I can appreciate the heat of it already.  I’d give myself a couple of hours to mope and then I’d make my way to the club.  With every sip of coffee, I begin to feel more human, and I close my hours to enjoy the rare silence that’s around me .. until the sound of a car coming towards my house has me peeking out of one eye.

Dads car is one I’d recognise in a packed garage.  I take a deep breath when it pulls into the drive way and am only slightly shocked when Mom steps out.

“What are you doing here?”

My Mom looks as glamorous as always .. the fact its Sunday and the day of rest has no bearing on her wardrobe choice as she struts towards me in a pristine white linen pants, a silk camisole and beautiful pair of sandals that I definitely wouldn’t mind owning “You weren’t answering or returning mine or your fathers calls. We were worried.”

“I guess finding out my sister betrayed me, in the worst possible way, hasn’t really left me in the mood to talk to anyone today.” I hug my knees and sip my coffee as my Mom takes a seat next to me.  Here expression is blank.  She’s not asking questions or pressing the matter.  She’s not even shocked which can only mean one thing and I feel sick all over again as the pieces begin to slot into place “Oh my god … you knew.”

Mom looks away momentarily an sucks in a breath then slowly exhales while nodding her head “We did. We found out a few days before your attacked and-“

“And you didn’t think to tell me?!” 

“We gave them the opportunity to come clean.  If they didn’t tell you then we were going to but … well … then everything else happened and that because unimportant.  You and your health was our priority and you needed your family around you.” She looks me straight in the eye “You knowing wouldn’t have helped anything, so your father and I dealt with it in the best way we could at the time.”

“What the hell does that even mean?!” I stand up and begin pacing the porch “Mom, you’ve had quite a few years to tell me.” The ache I felt last night in my chest comes back and I can feel my eyes stinging with tears once more.  I feel so betrayed. Not just by Ruby but by my parents too.

“By the time you were in a better place, mentally, Naz was gone.  It seemed silly to bring it all up, open old wounds and potentially ruin your relationship with your sister.” I scoff at that word in complete disgust and shake my head as I head back towards my front door “I don’t have a sister.”