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[lambiewrites]

Harvey: So, Farmer, how would you describe your average daily meal?

Farmer: No.

Harvey: …I… I think you misunderstood. What do you eat-

Farmer: I don’t.

Harvey: …What do you mean you don’t?

Farmer: I just… don’t. I usually don’t feel the need to eat.

Harvey: Farmer, it’s a normal bodily function! You need nutrients, especially with a job like yours that requires so much physical labor!

Farmer: I can just sleep it off.

Harvey: Sleep it off?! When was the last time you’ve eaten?

Farmer:

Farmer: Uh…

Harvey: Farmer… When was the last time you’ve eaten? You must have had something, even if it’s just a snack.

Farmer: Well, I guess there was that bread I fished out of the saloon’s trash can.

Harvey: The saloon’s tra- Farmer, Farmer please tell me you’re joking?? You raise healthy crops and animals, enough to make your own balanced meals every day! And- you’re eating scraps?!

Farmer: Oh- Actually, sometimes when I’m fishing, I reel up some seaweed and algae. Three or four of those usually give me enough energy to last past midnight.

Harvey:

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[lambiewrites]

Stardew Valley Text-Posts

Please reblog haha you’re so sexy

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SHUT UP THIS WAS SO WHOLESOME AND EVERYTHING TO ME AHHHHH!!!

💗🎀

papa!simon is on my mind, so ask about olderbf!simon and papa!simon cause my asks are open and I'm being super generous--okay bye!

“My boobs hurt,” You whine, rubbing them over the fabric of your t-shirt. Simon watches you from the dining chair, Sitting with your daughter, trying to get her to finish her food. You were making yourself a mineral water mocktail while Simon drank his beer.

“I’ll massage them later,” He offers, which comes out more like a statement. “Eat,” he points to his daughter's half empty plate. She shakes her head, “No tv.” He raises a brow, “Don’t,” you chuckle. “Go babe,” You say, grabbing her plate and letting her run off to do god knows what in the living room. 

“She’s never gonna learn,” Simon sighs, watching his baby run around throwing her toys in the air, causing destruction. “That’s your fault.” you laugh. Simon gets up, clearing his plate, “I know,” he admits, rubbing your very swollen belly. 

“They’re gonna be worse!” he dips down to peck your stomach, “I’m gonna go change.” He says stretching. 

When he comes out to the living room, You on the couch and your Simon duplicate rolling around on the floor while her cartoons play in the background. “What are you doing, bug?” He gets on the floor also, laying on his back, letting his daughter roll around him, occasionally kicking his side or slapping him in the face accidentally. 

You were on your phone not paying attention to the two on the floor, Until it got quiet, Your daughter sitting on Simon's stomach while he laid on the floor, both of them staring at the tv. 

“You okay?” you say looking up from your phone. 

Simon looks at you, “Tv.” he mumbles and gets right back to it. You tap him with your foot, “Since she’s down, get her pigtails out.” He nods, swatting your foot away from his shoulder. 

He lifts her with so much ease, and takes the rubber bands from her out so easily and quickly, Playing with the warm honey curls that sit on top of her head, massaging her scalp a little. 

Simon sat on the floor with his back on the couch and your guy's daughter between his legs, he played with her hair, her big brown eyes getting droopy with sleep. 

“I need to give her a bath,” You whisper to Simon who was too invested in Mulan. “C’mon buggie, Bath and then we go to sleep.” You say reaching for her, She nods.

You bathe her, and get her under the covers in no less than 45 minutes. 

Simon holding her in his arms, rocking her back and forth just like he did when she was a newborn, “You sleepy buggie?” he mumbles to her, she nods her eyes closed and head on his shoulder, “Me too.” he sighs, placing his hand on top of her head, “Let’s make night-night.” He places her on her toddler bed, under five minutes she’s out, small snores leave her mouth. 

You stand at the edge of your bed rubbing your big belly while you watch Simon kiss her cheek and tuck the cover around her for the millionth time. 

RAHHHHH I NEED TO GIVE HIM A SOCCER TEAM----

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baby blue 💙

[lambiewrites]

hey y’all, I took a break (might still be on break) because I had seen soooo much dark content that I couldn’t filter thru no matter how I tried and idk I may come back but I’m not sure. I’m not sure what to do tbh.

[lambiewrites]

[lambiewrites]

Johnny doesn’t let just anyone see his journal. Absolutely no one! But you? You’re his everything of course you can see it. He gives you a warning about the darker things he’s written and see in there. Gives you like a heads up or like a trigger warning type of heads up.

You run your fingers over each page and you’re in awe of his drawings and you can’t help but look over them over and over again.

You’re his partner. And I don’t mean on the battlefield or partner in crime. You’re his love. His everything.

And of course you signed your name in delicate cursive on one of the pages ❤️

[lambiewrites]

Soap having a giant ass family means so much to me ❤️

Call of duty but Soap has a big and I mean big family that the rest of the 141 task force don't know about.

They just assume that it's only soap, his mother and sister as there are the only people Soap ever talks about and then are surprised when they're invited to a family reunion and soaps like "this is my mother and sister and over there are my aunt and uncles as well as grand parents and cousins as well as few nieces and nephews as well".

And though they're surprised they're much more surprised that they all get called family by all these people.

Price is the grandpa that while a bit out of date with the world is the one who teaches them the best ways to survive in it and get up stronger each time you fall time. He also has a few trauma induced jokes as well.

Gaz is that big friendly cuddle bear sibling who listens mostly to grandpa more then anyone else but is also mature enough to figure his own path out even though sometimes it seems like he's wading through deep waters.

Ghost is the one who's seen the most darkest places on earth and while seems like an arse doesn't want anyone else to go through what he did especially his teammates and more especially Johnny.

And they're all surprised when not even a single member of soaps family are afraid of them. Not even the two year old with smile just like soaps and dark raven hair who refuses to let go of ghosts leg.

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˚₊‧꒰ა this post is sfw, but my blog is 18+ so minors and ageless blogs dni please !! ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

Thinking about Johnny actively trying to get you pregnant in February or early March so you two have your first baby for Christmas <3

The snow outside falls in thick flakes that flutter to the ground, gradually coating the world around you in a sheet of pure white. Despite the frigid temperature, you and Johnny are as warm as could be. Your husband stokes a fire to life in the living room while you soak up the heat from your oven. Wordlessly, Johnny slips into the kitchen and wraps his bulky arms around your waist. A smile crosses your lips as you savor your lover’s presence.

“Thought I’d make some fresh bread to go with dinner tonight,” you say while kneading a lump of dough. Johnny just hums softly in response to your statement. 

“I ken wha I want for next Christmas, mo ghràidh,” he whispers lowly before pressing kisses into your neck. 

“It’s a bit too early to be thinking about Christmas, don’t you think?” you giggle and shake your head, eyes not leaving the ball of dough on the counter. 

“Nae too early fer wha I have in mind,” Johnny’s voice trails off as his large hands slide from your waist to the front of your abdomen and gently press into the space just below your navel. Your lips part and a small gasp escapes you before you turn around to face your husband. 

“You want to have a baby with me?” you ask, your eyes soft and full of hope. 

“More than anythin, hen,” Johnny whispers before leaning down to press a kiss to your lips. The two of you spend the remainder of the evening in bed, keeping one another warm while working on creating your little Christmas gift. Your lump of dough sits abandoned on the countertop as you shift your attention to putting a different kind of bun in your oven.  

˚˖𓍢ִ໋ 🌷͙֒  ✧˚.༘⋆

“Mo ghràidh!” Johnny calls out from the front door of your shared cottage. “I finished the planting in the flowerbeds out front. Do ye want me tae get started on the back too?” 

Johnny’s question is met with silence and his thick brows knit together as he slips off his dirt-covered boots and steps further into your home. “Hen? Ya here?”

You step into the front hallway, hands clasped behind your back and a wide grin on your face. Johnny approaches you and smiles, using his fingers to gently tuck a few loose strands of hair behind your ear. “Wha’s got ye so happy?” 

“Looks like those flowers aren’t the only thing you planted,” you say with a soft giggle as you hand a positive pregnancy test to your husband. Johnny’s sky blue eyes go wide with awe and his lips part as if to speak, but he can’t make the words come out. “Looks like we’re getting what we want for Christmas!” 

“Oh, mah hen!” your husband exclaims as he wraps his burly arms around you and peppers kisses to your face before finally planting one to your lips. “This is gonnae be the best gift I’ve ever gotten.”

[lambiewrites]

If you wind up blocked by me, here's a reason why: Untagged smut Untagged dark fic, (i.e, dub-con, non-con, manipulation, and the likes that fall into this catogory) im a laid back person, but im tired of seeing untagged shit on my dash when i just wanna see fluff and fun stuff.

[lambiewrites]

Zuko and Aang, based on the cast photos from the live action Avatar series

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the gaang's back 🥹💜

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People be forgetting that Soap could probably fireman carry Ghost have you SEEN his muscles

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5’0” apparently but my driver’s license says 4’11”

Ok enough. Whats everyone’s heights. I want to make fun.

[lambiewrites]

It makes me laugh so hard when people write and they have no idea how tf anatomy works? Like? Please, I’m begging you. Do your research 😭 please.