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im actually pogging for real life rn/srs

little melody composition videogame music practice. Yes I know. I know it's good.

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It’s kind of amazing to me that Terry Pratchett started out writing novels that don’t even pass the Bechdel test and ended up at books like Equal Rites and Monstrous Regiment. I truly believe that the best writers end up being the ones who pay attention, educate themselves, notice flaws and patterns, not because someone yelled at them for not being social justice-y enough, but because they want their writing to really connect with people. Part of me is glad I’m only just beginning to get into the discworld novels, because I feel like Terry Pratchett had a lot to say about the world, and that I could spend MY entire life listening to him and what he said with his.

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I actually do feel like the "unemployed friend on a Tuesday" meme actually helps de-stigmatize unemployment because it frequently affirms that when you don't have a job you're more likely to be getting up to some weird shit rather than just lazing around. But I also feel like the unemployed friend is frequently up to some random shit because there's a whole pile of miscellaneous life tasks that full-time employment keeps people from. The unemployed friend is helping their cousin move, or babysitting, or checking in with a neighbor with mobility issues. The unemployed friend is a walking thesis on the inflexibility of our current labor landscape and just how much work exists outside of work.

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A cis woman tells me that maybe she should transition to gain male privilege as I'm recovering from getting beaten up in the men's bathrooms.

I tell her to be my guest and give me a call when she gets her jaw broken, I always carry a first aid kit and a pepper spray.

She calls me a misogynistic asshole.

A cis man tells me that he'd sure love some T.

Gave him my prescription and best of luck with the constant shortages and getting denied.

He calls me a pussy.

I'm fighting for my life and reproductive rights. I get told to get off women's fights, that it's not about me, like I shed my womb after my first T shot.

I search for support groups for SA victims, and I'm stuck in the same “women/NBs only”. Still shooting my shot, send an application. I introduce myself. Never get a call back.

I go to a trans night. Say I go by he/him. Get told back “yeah, that's how we all start !” by a trans woman. I'm too exhausted, I get up and I leave.

I hang out with my friends, one of them drunkenly says masculinity is a prison we must learn to escape. She gets rows of applause. Back to drinking alone.

Yes I could explain it. But who'd you rather be ? A delusional girl or a man made threat ?Or it could be better, I could just not exist ! And we'd bleach my corpse and I'd become a casualty. Not an F, ot an M, a W for Wound and for Wrong.

I put a candle on a single cupcake, 2 years on HRT. I blow it in the dark. Curtains closed like casket.

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I’d like to live through a week that’s not a whole new verse of “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

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canceled my prime membership today

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"Mom! Phineas and Ferb are developing a proletariat class consciousness!"

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Last song: teenage dirtbag

fav color: colectivley a midtone purple, fronter, purple in general

currently watching: nothing really? were in short form content hell atm

last movie: barbie movie (for the 100000th time, we live with a 1yo)

sweet, sour, savory: savory and sweet personally, both is good

currently reading: uhhh last physical book, elenor jones cant keep a secret, other than that fucked up shit on ao3

relationships: bababababa bbg warren/haven collectivley, and impersonally dating a silly lil prince in one of our friend systems

current obsession: emo music, and fucked up animals that are either weird or very deadly

last google: cm to inches

currently working on: my relationships and self worth </3

nominate: uhhhhhh @xisumas-muddy-coins @prideful-dragonnephi @kokobot (congrats we dm)

9 people I want to get to know better

I was tagged by @nappe-plays-the-sims!

🎵 last song: "Lotta Love" by Nicolette Larson is what's currently playing. I've got the internet radio station set to the year I graduated, so there's a lot of familiar disco-y stuff going past me. Oh, it just changed to "Mama Can't Buy You Love" by Elton John

🌈 favourite colour: Does anybody really have a favorite color? It's been officially green since I was seven, though.

📺 currently watching: Let's see. At the moment the only things D is saving to watch with me are Sherlock's Daughter and Sister Boniface Mysteries. I'll probably arrange how I'm going to watch Murderbot today when I'm at gaming group with friends who use streaming services. My general impression from fan reaction is that it's going to have typical adaptation difficulties but be generally acceptable watching. I'd be surprised if it were half as addictive as the books, though.

🎥 last movie: Oh, lord, what was it? We don't get to movies very often. It seems like I ought to remember. Oh, it was Here!

🍜 sweet, savory, sour: People have favorites of these? You need all of them for the full range of taste experience! More of my preferred foods have sweet or savory dominating than sour.

📚 currently reading: The Second Biggest Nothing, by Colin Cotterill.

❤️ relationship: Coming up on 35th anniversary of marriage.

🗺️ current obsession: Not really. Trying not to obsess about the State of the World, which just overwhelms me and makes me useless when I let it.

🔎 last google: "movies November 2024." My husband couldn't remember either but we narrowed it down to that month and there it was.

🖥️ currently working on: A Murderbot Diaries fic about Gurathin's "Mom," a Comfort Unit. I'm giving this poor man such a complicatedly awful life. May or may not finish it. Also the perennial quest to get the house in order.

Normally I tag the last x number of people in my activity field, but that would include a bunch of strangers liking and passing on my addition to that Murderbot remark, so I'll be a little pickier this time, let's see: @ao3cassandraic, @nerianasims, @alianoralacanta @silvermars because I actually had a little conversation with them and this kicks it out of my usual circles, @eulaliasims, @medleymisty, @rosewind2007, @shadysentinel, @natteryaktoad.

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fixated very hard on these, so im taking a break before my brain gets fried and i lose interest again, but meet some of my ocs from my fantasy/dnd inspired story ^_^ !

the full plot is still in progress, but those are some of the minor characters from it i had a clear picture of in my head <3 they didn't come out exactly how i imagined, but i still love them

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I wish that people realized that if someone is delusional about being a system that they are still valid

I am psychotic and part of my delusion is believing that I'm somebody else/that I'm multiple people. This has caused me to deeply resonate with plurality and I now identify as plural due to my psychosis. I am real and I am valid

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you deserve to feel proud to be yourself full-time

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stamps

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Algorithmic Identity Dysphoria

Algorithmic Identity Dysphoria is a profound and persistent disconnect between one's offline self; and the curated online personas they maintain across various platforms. This goes beyond simply presenting a "best self" and involves a deep-seated feeling that their online identities are more "real" or desirable than their physical, offline existence.* Symptoms include intense anxiety or distress when offline, a constant urge to engage with and validate online personas, neglecting real-world responsibilities and relationships, feeling alienated or unreal when not embodying their online selves, potential for developing multiple distinct online "identities" that feel more authentic than their core self.