laura5407 - Tumblr blog

[laura5407]

come on man

[laura5407]

my brother kept playing with two ssds so I said "aw you're making them kiss" and he answered "yeah. and there's a 500 gb difference between them. barely legal" I'm going to blow him up

[laura5407]

Thinking about this poem I wrote two days ago.

[laura5407]

[laura5407]

[laura5407]

I'm on your dash

[laura5407]

instead of making fanart or fanfics with your barely-disguised fetish, consider instead making it so blatant that it's simply not ignorable or deniable. put your shit in there with all the subtlety of an atomic bomb

[laura5407]

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS

WHO IS USING THIS

AN APP??? THEY HAVE A FUNCTIONING WEBSITE

THE LAST FUNCTIONING WEBSITE

[laura5407]

Penelope: *strained in her room, depressed*

Odysseus: *has ptsd, on the verge of throwing himself off of a cliff*

Telemachus: "I didn't die! Best day ever :D"

Someone help this family

[laura5407]

Penelope: *strained in her room, depressed*

Odysseus: *has ptsd, on the verge of throwing himself off of a cliff*

Telemachus: "I didn't die! Best day ever :D"

Someone help this family

[laura5407]

When the night starts with “There are other ways of persuasion…” but ends with “—back at home my wife awaits for me” 😳

[laura5407]

[laura5407]

Ranking Vampire Blood Sources By Their Eroticism

Vampires can of course suck blood from any part of their victim, but what is the sexiest place to drink from? Here is a ranking of the hottest body parts to suck blood from, for a vampire*

The Neck

You can't go wrong with this classic. The neck has many nerves and some of the biggest blood vessels in the body. 8/10

The Inner Thigh

Need it hotter? Go for the femoral artery. The thigh is both delicious and soft and one of the best erogenous zones. 9/10

The Arm

It's an arm. It's not bad but it's not all that sexy. 7/10

The Butt

This depends on personal taste, no pun intended. The glutes can be plump and playful, but others may find the whole region dirty. 3-6/10

The Eye

The eyes are the windows to the soul, and bleed very well when punctured, but the pain level is far too cruel for any but the most extreme sadists of vampirekind. 2/10

The Fingertip

Unless your vampire is checking your blood sugar this just isn't very compelling. 3/10

The Ribs

Oh god yes. Ever nibble someone's ribs? Ever let them nibble yours? Imagine a vampyric feast on that sexy sexy ribcage. 10/10

The Renal Artery

When your body needs to clean your blood of toxins and other gross stuff, it sends that blood to the kidneys. The kidneys are the sewage filter of the blood and they're not even conveniently placed. Unquestionably the least sexy place for the human and vampire alike. 0/10 would not suck.

*Facts-I-Just-Made-Up does not condone drinking the blood of the living nor dead nor anything not prepared by culinary professionals.

[laura5407]

Here’s to hoping we get more Hermes and Jay episodes for the Vengeance Saga-

[laura5407]

If I had to choose a last meal before getting sent to the gallows I would choose all of the worlds suffering so nobody has to hurt anymore

[laura5407]

why are bathroom sinks designed like that. infuriating

[laura5407]

fanfics are one of the best things that humanity has come up with. i fucking love reading stories about my favorite characters from people who have the same brainrot as me