leaf0001 - Tumblr blog

[leaf0001]

nearly had a medical emergency today because - and i cannot stress enough how little i am making this up - a helicopter landed in front of an open grain silo while i was getting off my ship and i am deathly allergic to the wheat that said helicopters rotor blades proceeded to blast in my face at full force. the cosmic forces are plotting against me ass situation to be in

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Customer: MY GIRLFRIENDS NAME DMV: YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP Verdict: DENIED

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Your wish is my command, random advertisement. I don't know what you expect me to do with your devilish concoction, but your wish remains my command.

I need to know what demographic hates this! Dentists? Dermatologists? General Doctors? Counter-Terrorist Organizations? Interpol? The USPS? Grocery Store Employees? The lucrative 18-35 demographic? Will I be put on trial for war crimes? But you don't tell me, you just tell me to mix one with the other and fail to tell me who hates this one weird trick!

Well joke's on you I'm going to do it without looking at your probably actively malicious website, and find out what you're not telling me! If it turns into an explosive, it's entirely on you, random advertisement.

[leaf0001]

Sorry for commenting “nightmare blunt rotation” on your Facebook photo album from your baby shower

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can someone please send me that post abt washing your sheets "climb in my brothers"

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My beautiful and courageous sons username and password are being killed by a freak called Sign in with Google

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Psych (2006) really is just "Hi, we're detectives with the police department, and here's this weird guy who follows us around. No we can't stop him. We like him. Also here's his best friend. We can't stop him either. We tried."

[leaf0001]

uhhhh reverse Delicious in Dungeon. Disgusting in Restaurant. nothing's edible

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other drivers will see your safe distance from the vehicle in front of you and go "is for me? 🥺" and then proceed to not use their turn signal before swerving into your lane

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brb going outside to wistfully observe the reflections of the shop lights in the wet streets

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do they think i'm stupid

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It's Make a Terrible Comic Day

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cm97 smythe they really are screaming in his face you will always be the best player on the ice but it will never be enough to count. like to lose in such a devastating way after dragging this team back from the dead over and over and immediately after be awarded a trophy for being the 'MVP' while the trophy he actually wants is elsewhere in the building just out of his reach. how much can I yell about this

[leaf0001]

canadian hockey fan here

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That’s a pretty cool political opinion you got there dude. Did your web of online friends and mutuals who all subconsciously monitor each other and self-correct in a panopticon-esque fashion to ensure that your views all stay in line with each other’s at all times pick it for you?

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follow-up to this: emerson fittipaldi is a top tier auto racing name

luc robitaille is a top tier hockey name

[leaf0001]

good luck to all the oilers and canucks fans on this website tonight