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the only reliable, effective way of "protecting children" is education. but people don't want to hear that because they don't actually care about protecting children, they care about protecting a mythologised ideal of innocence

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Breaking News Alert: our gracious prince has found the beautiful young woman who came thrice to his ball—once in a dress shimmering like starlight, once in a dress luminous as the moon, and once in a dress as golden and radiant as the sun on a summer day—only to discover that she was a scullery maid working in his own kitchen! needless to say she has been executed

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You guys have GOTTA learn to stop seeking absolution from strangers online.

If someone says "haha Americans are so self-centered they don't know anything about other countries", you don't gotta jump in and explain that actually it's not your fault because you had a bad education. Just learn from the post and move on!

If someone says "white people hate rap because they're racist", you don't gotta jump in and start listing all the totally valid reasons you personally don't like it. You don't have to justify your music taste to strangers, just move on!

If someone says "people should be more involved in their local communities" you don't gotta jump in and start listing all the reasons that you personally can't leave your house and so actually the original post is really ableist. Just accept that the post doesn't apply to you and move on!

Stop publicly demanding that the internet absolve you of sins that some random dipshit made up, it is always going to make you look bad and you'll wind up trapped in an anxious cycle of needing external validation for every aspect of your personality. You don't have to justify yourself to randos on the internet.

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Rules of DIY:

if it's a skill, there's rules you can learn

if it's an art, rules are not your concern

make it fucked up or you won't make it

if it's already broken, you can't break it

anything can be fixed with gorilla glue

except for pleather, and also you

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Random linguistic worldbuilding: A language with six sets of pronouns, which are set by one's current state of existence. There's a separate pronoun for people who are alive, people who are dead, and potential future people who are yet to be born, and the ambiguous ones of "may or may not be alive or aleady dead", "may or may not have even been born yet", and the ultimate general/ambiguous all-covering one that covers all ambiguous states.

The culture has a specific defined term for that tragic span of time when a widow keeps accidentally referring to their spouse with living pronouns. New parents-to-be dropping the happy surprise news of a pregnancy by referring to their future child with the "is yet to be born" pronoun instead of a more ambiguous one and waiting for the "wait what did you just say?" reactions.

Someone jokingly referring to themselves with the dead person pronouns just to highlight how horrible their current hangover is. A notorious aspiring ladies' man who keeps trying to pursue women in their 20s despite of approaching middle age fails to notice the insult when someone asks him when he's planning to get married, and uses the pronoun that implies that his ideal future bride may not even be born yet.

A mother whose young adult child just moved away from home for the first time, who continues to dramatically refer to their child with "may or may not be already dead" until the aforementioned child replies to her on facebook like "ma stop telling people I'm dead" and having her respond with "well how could I possibly know that when you don't even write to us? >:,C"

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hermey the elf was transgender

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some of you are abusing the power of kungpowpenis

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Scooby Doo is the most useless member of the scooby doo team why is the show named after him, the show should be called Velma

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My grandma’s on and off again boyfriend that she cheated on grandpa with died today.

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Gull inspecting two fake eggs and deciding to incubate the larger one By: Thomas D. McAvoy From: Life Nature Library: Animal Behavior 1965

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tgis is so fucking funny to me. they accidentally Rock Lee'd a retired racehorse

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the best part of that david lynch interview is this: 

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I’m so tired of hot actors with no actual talent or magnetism. we need more ugly little cuntservers giving performances that fuck so hard you leave the theatre with road rash. willem dafoe if you’re out there

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CH

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idk why but there is something unusually funny to me about Will Wood using social media extremely sparingly but making an exception to post this long ass rant about how much he hates the Netflix Wednesday show on his youtube community page