legojack - Tumblr blog

[legojack]

can't wait for jack to have a fit of nostalgia five years down the line and buy the haus for cash as an impulse purchase

[legojack]

interviewer: so, jack, what was your first big purchase after you joined the falconers? a car? vacation? 

jack, thinking about how the day after his contract was finalized he accepted a $700 venmo request from shitty with the comment “fee for making me watch a documentary on the franco-prussian war”: i got a new watch

[legojack]

jack’s love language is being goofy

[legojack]

To all the parents out there who bundle their babies up in the winter time with those little hats with the little ears that make them look like little teddy bears: You are doing the lord’s work. Seeing tiny ewoks toddle across the grocery store parking lot is just what we all need sometimes. My joy is immeasurable and my day is restored.

[legojack]

not to flex but my anniversary is also today, taylor

[legojack]

the one thing I’m actually quite sad about is the fact that since lardo learned about jack and bitty after the fact, we don’t have the canonical possibility of bitty shutting the door to lardo’s room and the two of them having a giggly conversation about jack and shitty, and bitty confiding in her in regard to his worries about sex, and lardo half-confiding in him in regard to her worries about romance, and it definitely ends up in the kitchen at midnight with a banana and an old strawberry flavoured condom 

[legojack]

i just love the idea of lardo, crying in public about shitty which makes her absolutely infuriated, stabbing angrily at her froyo with her spoon and bitty sitting there vibrating like "do i. do i tell her. should i tell her i know what she's going through or is that dumb. its probably dumb. no one except one thousand of my closest faceless youtube subscribers who watched my public youtube video can know about my crush on jack" and then lardo is like "are YOU ok?" and bitty (sympathetic crier) shakes his head and is like "I Have Feelings For Jack" and lardo is like (nods, considers) "yeah we need to knock this shit off" "RIGHT?" "this is so embarassing for us." "humiliating."

[legojack]

omgcp fan to ted lasso fan pipeline my beloved

[legojack]

have you ever noticed you pick up little habits and phrases from the people you love? it’s no wonder our hearts are so easily broken when people leave. we become a reflection of the people that we care about and those personality traits stick with us even if the people don’t

[legojack]

my inability to differentiate platonic and romantic relationships/interests/etc is going to ruin me <3

[legojack]

Shitty: my full name is Byron Sterling Knight

Lardo: oh. so you’re white white

[legojack]

I kinda like to think that lardo gets pregnant while her and shitty are still in Haus 2.0 and even though the both of them feel guilty at first, like they're "forcing" such a huge life change onto ransom and holster, they are obsessed with being live-in uncles

They'll come home from work, lie down on the floor with her during tummy time and just rant about their day to her as she babbles along

and all of ransom and holster’s co workers are like ‘oh wow that must be so annoying having a newborn live with you’ and they’re like ‘she’s literally our best friend? so shut up??'

[legojack]

Jack and Parse doing All-Star and being forced to play the newlywed game along with everybody else as a promo thing except that everybody else does mediocre at best and Jack and Parse accidentally get a perfect score and it's weird

[legojack]

I miss the god complex english class gave me

[legojack]

the zimmermanns really spent the whole time up until year three being like “yes were are a happy, healthy, perfect family and not three traumatized people in a trench coat” didn’t they 

[legojack]

jack: went to a museum with dad

bitty: sounds fun honey!!!

jack: yeah. can we call? i want to fill you in

bitty: on the...whole museum???

[legojack]

i still think the funniest dynamic is bob and alicia being like "we are the cool sex positive parents", making suggestive comments on their own sex life to embarrass jack in front of his boyfriend over lunch one day, followed by bitty having to hide the fact that he is choking on his food and later in the evening being like "your PARENTS talk about SEX???????? TO YOU????" and jack is like "oh yeah its so embarrassing right? they used to buy me condoms too" and bitty is like (flashes back to the time his mama told him an elaborate tale about a giant bird that drops infants off at their parents doorstep, southern abstinence-only sex ed classes where he was told that sex ends in pregnancy and or death always, coach trying to have "the talk" with him when he was 14 but speaking strictly in half mumbled football metaphors, learning literally everything he knows from google and porn) "THEY FUCKING WHAT?"