legokingfisher

[legokingfisher]

freaks

[legokingfisher]

The Weeping Angels are really scary until you realize if any organism sees them they are fucked so they get hard countered by geckos, who don't blink and can see in the dark. If the Doctor strapped like two geckos onto him he'd be fine.

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Sillies

original pic:

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When it was discovered that Zalim (ironically meaning, cruel) was in the company of two very young cubs, those at Ranthambore feared the worst: that, as an adult male, he would kill them. Instead, he surprised naturalists with his “motherly” behavior when he took in his twin daughters following the death of their mother.

At this time, science stated that tigers were only as social as mothers and cubs could go and that tiger fathers rarely interacted with their offspring. Zalim changed that when he was witnessed, month after month, caring for his daughters and teaching them how to hunt. Their relationship eventually ceased when the two girls were shifted to Sariska Tiger Reserve and Zalim went on to father another litter with the then-dominant tigress Sundari, the so-called Lady of the Lakes. When she too mysteriously disappeared, Zalim unsurprisingly took care of their cubs as well.

Ranthambore National Park, India Photograph taken via camera trap

[legokingfisher]

I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

[legokingfisher]

Cole and Nya are workout buddies. Jay, uh, “joins” them from time to time. 

For those wondering, Cole’s favourite person to bench press is Zane cause he’s the heaviest and can actually hold still for a long period of time.

[legokingfisher]

i don’t know how to explain to you people that no matter what a country’s government is like i do not and will not support the US indiscriminately bombing that country’s civilians and i don’t know why that’s a controversial take tbh

[legokingfisher]

having anti punitive justice morals sucks because you want to say "man that guy sucks he should get hit with hammers until he dies" but you also want to make it clear you don't think anyone should be put in charge of the 'hit people with hammers until they die" machine.

[legokingfisher]

me admiring a beautiful man: wow he sure does have a vulnerable looking throat, huh?

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[legokingfisher]

the iconic thing about the twelfth doctor is that when he's on earth, he's getting middle school kids to save the earth via class project and having beef with 14 yr olds and losing. and then he sets foot in gallifrey and literally the actual military is like we're all going to die.

[legokingfisher]

I really am tempted to write a Doctor Who fanfiction called Janitor What where the main premise is (while being a pretty major plot hole himself) another timelord who was friends with The Doctor and The Master when they were young on Gallifrey. Only, instead of running in fear or being driven completely mad when forced to stare into The Untempered Schism, he is compelled to clean time and is captive to this illusion that time doesn't have to be so wibbly or wobbly at all. He sort of works as the timelord who actually does his job. Only issue is that his two best friends have gone absolutely off their rockers and he spends most of his time cleaning up their messes. In other words, The Janitor is who patches up plotholes. How did Pete Tyler know to catch Rose in Doomsday? The Janitor. What ever happened to The Valeyard? The Janitor. How are there no Reapers before or after Father's Day? You can thank The Janitor because that's his daleks baby. And The Janitor always shows up in this shipping crate that says Fragile on the side and he's got a tool belt of bullshit like an Ultraviolet Spanner, a Gammaray Hammer, or the Sub-o-matic plunger. Of course, the even better gimmick of it all is when he lands and is asked who the hell he is. I mean it is the very last place one expects to have hired a janitor. Which always prompts a mind boggled, "Janitor? What?"

[legokingfisher]

stoned and autistic at a party trying to make conversation: I find the comparative lifespan of organisms so interesting. Spiders are comparatively long lived animals. Female black widows can live up to 3 years but their male counterparts rarely live four months. Some tarantulas live upwards of 20 years. The longest lived spider was around 43 years old when she was cruelly assassinated by a parasitic wasp. Domestic rats have a lifespan comparable to female black widows. To put things into perspective, there are spiders that remember a pre-pandemic world but it is likely every rat on earth was born post-COVID. There could be a spider out there born when Reagan was in office.

[legokingfisher]

Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.

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If this flops I'm lowk blowing you ALL up... baby and teen ras... of this flops u all hate me and want me to die !!!