lemondoddle

[lemondoddle]

the big three: big brown eyes, an indescribable amount of horniness and a generalised anxiety disorder

[lemondoddle]

i have never read a book but i have read 100,0000,00,00,00,0,0,00,000000,0, posts. 😏

[lemondoddle]

continually astounded to learn that someone around me is actually for real christian. like. aren't you supposed to grow out of that

[lemondoddle]

please put me in twink jail

I'm an prison bolitionist I'll put you in a twink sanctuary where you can roam free and use your unique curved beaks to filter shrimp from the waters of your natural habitat x

[lemondoddle]

they should invent tech issues that other people have experienced and solved

[lemondoddle]

i just think more 30-40 year old men should be more whorish. act your age for once.

[lemondoddle]

Student : Wowww the cafeteria food is so nastyyyy today right Alyssa ?

Alyssa : Yes

Their friend Randy who has been trying to convince them for months that he was a death row inmate in his previous life: For my final meal they fed me the worlds roundest pea

[lemondoddle]

truly nothing to say but wig

[lemondoddle]

there’s something so desperately miserable about the lyric “buy me some peanuts and cracker jack / i don’t care if i never come back”

[lemondoddle]

i could fuck a thunderstorm if i really put my mind to it

[lemondoddle]

observation: among a certain subset of tumblr users, the term “blorbo” has become unchic, but the concept it describes is still important; and so it has been replaced with “The Character”

[lemondoddle]

i want to be an actor in porn but not a porn star i want to be the evil wife whose husband is having a lurid gay affair and i pretend i don’t notice while they’re doing looney toons shit to each other under the dinner table. that’s acting to me

[lemondoddle]

Flirting telepathically tonight so if you get nightmares its just me

[lemondoddle]

“gentle reminder-” VIOLENT FORGET !!! ❌

[lemondoddle]

LOOP OF UNHAPPINESS ASSETS!!! Here are all the silly little images I made in a Google Drive folder since there’s so dang many. I’ve gotten a bunch of requests for the malware images in particular, those are here!!

Click here to view!!!

[lemondoddle]

he’s so cute i want to trap him in the labyrinth. or crucify him or something.