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We looked inside some of the posts by lestarl and here's what we found interesting.
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yikes. it’s been a year since i popped by.
june 30th was a huge day for me. it was a day i knew was coming but didn’t have the courage to act upon how i felt. how scary is it. you don’t exactly remember the date, the time or what you were doing - but in the midst of it all you fell out of love. someone you spent 5 years with - laughing, joking around with, being vulnerable with.
this sucks. this truly does. to let go of not only a relationship but a true friendship.
in the midst of all the sad feelings, i truly believe we will grow as stronger people out of this. i only wish the best for you and i really hope that there will be a day that the girl you find will treat you and give you the love you deserve. one that i couldn’t give to you.
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march 13, 2016.
I'm writing this so i can look back march 13, 2017.
i came home from lemongrass chicken with nunu. i came straight to my room and cried about you. and past experiences i can't seem to let go of.
i want to look back at this and remind myself this was a temporary phase, things will be okay esther.
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the relationship between truth and memory. did things really happen the way you remember them?
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i remember when i was younger and i hated myself. i hated where i came from. i hated everything about my life. there were times when i questioned god “why me?”
all the heartbreak, the hate, feelings of insecurity -it made me who i am today. i can distinctly remember when my heart was physically in pain, when it was so unbearable i wanted to stay in bed forever.
fast forward to today- i feel indestructible (lol). as the saying goes “you can only feel the highs when you’ve felt the lows.” and to be honest, i still have bad days... but they’re manageable. i’ve come to a realization that everything happens for a reason. nothing is fixed, nothing is certain. there is and will be light coming your way no matter what.
i’m on the road to finding my happiness and my purpose on earth. <3
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