letitrainathousandflames-archive

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Seen today on walk peace and love on planet earth

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EVERYONE(!) I’m blazing this post because at this pace we might barely hit 1,000,000 signatures—or just fall short. PLEASE reblog this post, no matter where you are from, so we can reach as many EU citizens as possible and end this horrible practice!

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Hondo: yeah we got some highly explosive and illegal cargo for one mister *squints at datapad* Darth Tit-Anus

Dooku: IT’S TYRANNUS YOU UTTER IMBECILE! UNCULTURED SWINE! SCUM!

Hondo: yeah fine mr Anus now are we gonna get paid or

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I just love tall, skinny guys and idk why. Like muscle doesn’t matter to me at all.

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when the power went out i heard an explosion and my boyfriend was like “a transformer probably busted” and i deadass thought he meant Optimus Prime was out there nutting

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For users old enough to remember life before widely available internet, reblog and put in the tags your favourite part of it

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ethically sourced from tumblr post under the cut

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There's a lot of dumb ass animal cruelty takes in general but my favorite is the people who think you need to force sled dogs to pull.

Have you ever walked a dog before in your entire life? They love to pull. They're the pullingest damn things you ever saw. They'll merrily rip your rotator cuff in half like a phone book for the chance to stick their own face into a pile of old feces. They'll drag you down the road while you go through all 5 stages of grief trying to make them stop.

There are hundreds of products on the market promising to get ordinary non sled dogs to stop pulling their hapless owners down the road and spilling their iced coffees. People have gone so far as to use electric collars to try and zap sense into their poor stupid labradoodle that wants nothing more but to suicidally pull itself and everyone it loves into the snarling maw of the nearest leash reactive pit bull.

A dog that's allowed to pull, nay, encouraged to pull, is probably the most self actualized animal on the planet right after seagulls that live somewhere with food stands outdoors.

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Can I ask what an archive blog is?

well, basically I've had this blog for years and didn't want to delete it bc there's some cool stuff here, but i wanted to change blogs. So I started using another one as my main, and this one is no longer updated but it's still here. I hope this helps. If you wanna see new content, you can find me on @letitrainathousandflames :)

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Are you going to pay for my therapy now that I will be having nightmares and living in fear of Jar Jar and his Cloaca?

I could spend my entire savings, present and future, and I would still not be able to pay for everyone who's ever seen that post's mental health professional needs.

I'm so deeply sorry, bud. But hey, there's plenty of blame to go around here - Jar Jar anon is the one who started this >:/

btw i'm now on @letitrainathousandflames

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anyway yeah this is an archive blog I’m now at @letitrainathousandflames

“Why is your first tumblr an archive blog now? What made you not want it anymore?”

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I came across your jar jar binks post and hadn't considered and now kinda would wanna and now am cursed with that inclination.

Anon, I don't wanna be mean, but I swear I had to read this ask three times to be fully certain that I'm not, in fact, having a stroke and I STILL don't get it

-

(P.S.: pls send all your further inquiries to @letitrainathousandflames bc this is currently just an archive blog 😉)

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Love the implication that I am the cashier

I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.

I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!

You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.

How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”

I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.

Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-

Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.

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Hornypasta

I’m weirdly proud that so many people are rediscovering the “jar jar is hung like a whale” post but i can’t take credit alone - anon was the one who made it happen, pour one out for him, the absolute legend

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You are robot robot?

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You’re the original poster of the Jar Jar binks is hung like a whale post right? You didn’t copy it from anyone else?

I am the original poster, yeah!!! Listen to me, there aren’t many things I’m proud of in this life but don’t take this from me, lmao I spent like twenty minutes writing that masterpiece in a frenzy, that pure mix of horror and confusion at an anon that was thirsting for JAR JAR BINKS of all things.

For some ungodly reason that’s my most popular post on this website and after a long inner struggle i’ve chosen to embrace this fact. Look, mom, I made it! I’m internet famous! Just please don’t ask me what for...

If you don’t know what the Jar Jar Binks Is Hung Like A Whale post is, here it is in all its glory, plaguing the internet for two years now

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bro if you cheat at mario kart again we’re gonna have to kick you out of the polycule