lettersfromsheyn - Tumblr blog

[lettersfromsheyn]

unknown

hey,

what am I supposed to do with all these broken pieces that you left?

[lettersfromsheyn]

05/11/2016 You see, my friend, I will always keep this. I will always be reminded of those late night conversations we had. The arguments. The way you challenges me with your intelligence. You never made me feel intimidated. You managed to make me feel at home. These are the first pictures we take together. I am really hoping these are not the last. If there is one thing I really wish right now, it is for you to come back to us. Safely. Because even though you gave us hard time understanding your complexities, we still love you. And we may seem a little bit angry now, we are still waiting for you. All you need to do is man up and face us. We will welcome you with open arms. So, please. Get back to us.

[lettersfromsheyn]

05/11/2016

Hey,

I just woke up from a very weird dream. Pero for some reason, parang totoo. I know we have been trying to avoid each other for a long time now. And sa totoo lang, nasasaktan na ako. Di lang kita kayang bitawan kasi mas masasaktan ako pag ginawa ko ‘yon.

Sa panaginip ko, nasa iisang room lang daw tayong dalawa, of course, may mga ibang tao rin na nandoon. Hinatid ka pa daw doon ng girlfriend mo. Ang hinidi ko lang maintindihan ay kung bakit nung nakita niya ako, umalis siya, pero minamanmanan niya ako. So I tried to stay on my place. Pinabayaan nalang kita. We exchanged looks. Too many meaningful looks. Na parang gustong gusto natin na mag-usap, but there is no way to do so. Masyado ka na kasing binabantayan. At ako naman, feeling ko restricted ako pagdating sa'yo. Paunti ng paunti ang mga tao. Lumipat ako ng upuan kasi nga pakiramdam ko nakatingin parin sa akin yong girlfriend mo. Ikaw naman si ano, tumabi ka pa sa akin. We didn’t talk. Pero pakiramdam ko, ang kumportable natin sa isa’t isa kahit na magkatabi lang tayo. After a while, dumating na ulit ‘yong girlfriend mo and sabi niya, mag-usap lang ulit kayong dalawa. I waited for you, pero di ka na bumalik. I watched you two silently. Kahit pala sa panaginip, nasasaktan din ako.

Nagising ako na sobrang miss na miss kita. I forgot how hard it is for me to just leave you behind. Sobrang dami pa kasi nung gusto nating pag-usapan, pero di natin alam kung saan magsisimula. And alam ko rin na kahit magusap man tayo, restricted lang din yong mapaguusapan natin. We are somehow scared to open up a topic that may destroy both of us. Pero knowing na nasa tabi kita, kahit wala mang paguusap na nagaganap, napakakumportable ng pakiramdam. Miss na kita, my friend. Balik ka na sa amin.

-shane to abants.

[lettersfromsheyn]

05/10/2016

Hey, I have to use this blog because my other blog is corrupted again. I think I let too many people to have access on that blog, thus I am in desperate need of hiding. I have been feeling overwhelmed lately. I mean, everything is just happening too fast. I couldn't catch up. I couldn't get the hang of it. Everything will be harder from now on. I need to face them all alone.