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he's streaming; tip?

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stop trying to be palatable, stop trying to be palatable, stop

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Someone is eating a fresh orange in this McDonald's. I smelled it and my head snapped up like a hunting dog. That smell doesn't belong in this wicked place

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💫🌲🎂 it's that time again!! 🎂🌲💫

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Isn't Hannibal problematic...

no, but i understand the confusion! it's a common misconception, but serial murder and cannibalism are okay in real life.

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"I asked chat gpt" well I asked a moldy old skull and he told me to beat you over the head with that laptop

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one of my favorite tropes in chinese literature is when a guy’s wife is clearly a ghost/demon/fox fairy and he just can’t see it. i’m reading a story where this guy keeps getting arrested because his wife will just magically steal steal shit out of sealed boxes and give it to him as a present, and whenever someone is like dude i think something’s up with his wife he asks her and she’s like i’m literally normal. so he turns around and says yeah guys she’s literally normal

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Dude this is so f*cking briliant.  To basically get Congress to realize how f*cked up data privacy laws are. He did data mining, targeted men over 45 that are within 5 miles of the US capital, and put ads out including “do you want to read Ted Cruise fanfiction”. it looks like 100s clicked it including 3 that seemed to be in the capital building while doing so, which then means he has their device info, ip address etc. which he can then mine even more. 

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I need to sit by the sea for 5 hours about this

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Back during the time when it was popular to bash Twilight for both legitimate reasons (Edward being borderline abusive to Bella, the whole child grooming plot point in Breaking Dawn, etc.) and not (REAL VAMPIRES DON’T SPARKLE THATS GAY), I saw this meme on Facebook where it was Louis and Lestat from Interview With The Vampire commenting on Edward’s sparkling and making fun of him for being gay. Like… Buddy My Guy. My Fair Dude. My Dear Sweet Homophobic Idiot. Not only are the Vampires in IWTV super duper gay, you’re lying to yourself if you think Lestat wouldn’t slam dunk his entire body into a tub of glitter on any given occasion. You Fool. You Imbecile.

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[greeting my transfem friend] yo wassup dawg? [remembers that 'dawg' in a casual context, while technically gender neutral, is usually used as a masculine descriptor] uhh i mean uhh [tries to think of a feminine equivalent on the spot] i mean wassup bitch?? [with my line of logic being that 'bitch' is a female dog. i however fail to realize in time that using 'bitch' towards a woman is derogatory. the bomb collar on my neck starts beeping]

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why do you hate swifties so much

because they aligned themselves with the treacherous count dooku