lilchxrmer

[lilchxrmer]

-- IT’S NOT AS IF she has ever expected to let things slide past Rosado- she has long learned that that is a futile task, and one with more punishment than reward. She still takes a moment to respond, lets her eyes snap shut for a moment. 

But like everything, Rosado is firm, both in word and in action as she feels his presence besides her. If there was anything that that whole portrait nonsense had taught her- besides the character development she had gotten, of course- it was that Rosado was reluctant to take no for an answer, if he thought it was for the best.

A sigh escapes her as she comes to proper wakefulness, dredging open eyelids caked with dried tears. Another small grossness that came from being sad, yuck. “Ahh… sorry, ‘sado,” she says, and even if there is strain in her voice, she takes the time to bop her head. “S’ just a nightmare. I’m not, like, hurt o-or anything…”

Even as she speaks, a hiccup escapes her, and she’s catching herself. If this was- perhaps, maybe, a scenario where she dozed off at some meeting or other and woke herself up with a startle, this wouldn’t be a problem. To be upright and cute for anyone at notice was a muscle she had trained well, after all. Whether it for an opponent, a citizen- should a princess be seen as unsightly, or unhappy, that destroys their whole point. To be cute and pleasant to look at is to uphold the spirits of those around you.

Of course, that was a theoretical. In public, at meeting. This is the small of her room, with Rosado by her side, and she is without her makeup and very tired. Any attempts to calm herself are squashed by a what’s the point?, and then further by the darkness surrounding her. So it is little wonder what comes next.

It’s a failure of her face, of her chin crumpling and her eyes pinching. She holds two hands to her face and tries to curl up into them, not to hide from Rosado, per se, but rather to keep the appearance in.

“Uhm, sorry,” she mumbles through her teeth for the second time. “I- sorry, ‘sado. I… I thought since it was o-over, I wasn’t upset… it was just a dream. It really was just a dream, and y-you’re here, and he’s- dad’s a-already-”

It’s that train of thought that seems to tip her over the edge, that has her careening into a river of snot and tears that stain the sheet below her. Even in the state she’s in, she’s awareness enough to be embarrassed by it, throwing her face into the mess as if to contain it. Quickly, it is smothered: choked up alongside every other feeling Hortensia has managed to swallow since the catacombs.

“I just don’t want it to end,” she mumbles when she’s caught her breath enough. “So many people died. That lady brought them back, but still- so many died. And then she died. All of this could be lost so easily, so I should cherish it, be happy with what I have- I’m so happy that you came back! And yet…” 

Another pathetic wail.“Isn’t it frustrating? I can put in all the practice I want to smile nicely and think happy thoughts, but I go to sleep and it doesn’t matter. I don’t want to remember things like that. I spent so long looking back and trying to bring him— trying to stay in happy memories again, and now I stop, and for what?” A small hiccup. “I just wanna be happy with y-you, and with Goldmary, and with I-Ivy… why can’t I? Everything else is over. Wh-why can’t I…”

In her own misery, Hortensia has twisted and curled herself further and further, as if she could reduce her thoughts alongside the space she took up.

together nothing goes as planned

horsebow moon; roommates prompt.

[lilchxrmer]

— DESPITE HERSELF, HORTENSIA FINDS her face aflush as Leif compliments her, then goes the step further. Not for any attraction to the man- for all the obvious reasons as well as she doesn’t know how old he is but probably not her range- but rather due to the sparcity of such statements from him. Even Ivy, for all her sincerity, will compliment Hortensia on dresses she’s put effort into before some political meeting or other. If nothing else, Hortensia is used to such words just being said.

And maybe its just that, too, but- if this Leif is anything like the Emblem she was once acquainted with, then Hortensia knew how reluctant he was to say exactly what she wanted, even when she asked outright. To be told so now, amid worries and frightful awareness that she was sweaty and the bottoms of her skirts sea-stained, was… nice, yes. It was nice.

“I don’t lie to you,” she says suddenly. “I’m very truthfully cute. I-�� She thinks of the times she’s asked Emblem Leif of one thing while wanting another, rephrases her thoughts. “I… wouldn’t call it lying anyhow. Just ‘cause I’m purposeful in how I present myself, or polite about how I phrase things, doesn’t mean I’m not being sincere…”

She smoothes out her skirt almost nervously. “I get that’s not what you meant, though,” she mumbles. “Sorry if that came off as strong…”

Her pout softens as Leif talks about his time by the ocean, of the pirates who ruined their seas. “That’s awful,” she gasps. “To have something so beautiful in your backyard, but unable to properly appreciate it… I’d just explode… but we’ve got the present now, ri-”

Any do-good cheery message she’d thought up on the spot to lift the mood is brushed aside with Leif’s hand on her face, tucking her hair behind her ear. She’s so startled by the motion that she’s hardly had the time to register it before the pearl is pulled out in front of her, a sparkling dot in the night. 

Hortensia takes the pearl gently, careful not to let it slip from her moistened fingers. How Leif managed to pull it off seamlessly, she couldn’t tell- but she takes the time to put the bead into her bag nonetheless, to thread onto her bracelet once she’s made it onshore.

She doesn’t respond immediately, instead pulling out her own bangle of beads and shaking one out onto the palm of her hand and giving it to Leif. There is no magic to the motion, as much as she terribly wishes there was, but the lanterns shine off of it prettily nonetheless.

“Wishes… Understanding people…” she repeats once she finally speaks. “I mean, that’s nice and all. I would definitely like that to be my wish. But my wish…” She bites her lip and for a moment, is tempted to claim otherwise. Perhaps she would, had Leif not spouted his infatuation with truthes- no, that was unfair of her.

“Ugh, I’m gonna sound so stupid after something as sweet as that, but I just wanna be liked. And have Elusia be liked, by proxy. And have Elusia flourish,” the last bit comes in a breath as she sighs, the thought escaping her. “Which, y’know. Maybe if I really cared I’d actually be back there assisting with things… but there felt like there was so little I could do. I’m not as experienced in things as I like to think I am, and I…”

She trails off, catching her mouth with her spare hand. “Eh… there I go again. Gosh! Embarrassing. I guess I keep on forgetting you’re not Emblem Leif anym… uhm. That I should be more formal! As a princess. Venting like this is really unprofessional, truthes or whatnot, yeah?”

If the slip of tongue is too painful to her, she tries not to make it obvious.

out somewhere else

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025:  first half.

[lilchxrmer]

-- IT IS MOMENT AFTER excruciating moment as Griss approaches, Hortensia's teeth rattling in upset alongside the table. It is testament to the progress she's made in controlling her character that she makes no comment on the matter. Perhaps, she reasons, he'll leave when she doesn't give him attention. Such is the nature of a hound, yes?

That he acknowledges her is a worst-case scenario. Curses upon curses for her inability to do anything but stand out in a room- Hortensia couldn't not be cute if it killed her. Perhaps this conversation would, if she let it linger.

"From certain points of view, maybe," Hortensia huffs, her grip on self-control lessened. "I'm sure everything that isn't dyed in blood is awfully depressing to you, huh?"

Her lip juts out and her back straightens as she stares very hard at the teacher at the front of the classroom, hands only shaking a little in intense faux-concentration. Spite is a great motivator, but she much prefers the feeling when there isn't a Griss staring down her neck. Whatever, it just means she has to-

...

...unfortunately he may have a point.

To understand what was a good color seemed to be very different than making it, and putting purple and pink and blue and yellow all together was making a color that was... ugh. Yes. Dark. And depressing. She chokes back a sigh.

"Okay, genius," she tosses her hands up in the air, voice hushed for fear of encouraging him too too much, "How would one make a cute little color?" She spins an empty bowl and clear cloth towards his end of the station, brow raised. "Like, actually cute. Like this." She motions at her hair, at the bow fastened to her chest. "Pink. Or blue, or anything that gets someone with more sanity than you to smile."

She leans back and crosses her arms. For all her moaning, she does seem genuinely curious in whatever it is that Griss'll end up making. "I hope you're better at making clothes than you are at wearing them," she mumbles.

nothing you could teach me

verdant rain moon; dye prompt

[lilchxrmer]

activity check

months: march, april & may 2025 events: boel, ethereal ball skill points earned: 5 +4 all +1 authority [ march monthly skill point ] -> used on authority [ april monthly skill point ] -> used on authority [ may monthly skill point ] -> used on authority [ boel skill point ] -> used on authority [ regarding fries and proper instruction ] -> authority point, partner dropped total skill points: 12 -> 17

[lilchxrmer]

“ Oh, hey there, Princess Hortensia! I see you and all your retainers made it here tonight. ”  That's not too surprising. All three of them seemed the type to relish in the opportunity to look good and had the fashion sense to back it up. It's a good experience to come in with a group of your closest to back you up too.

Lapis can only imagine how much Citrinne would have loved to be here. She finds she misses her an ocean away.

But that doesn't deter her from spending time on the young royal right in front of her. In doing so, she takes notice of something.

“ Oh, your hair ribbon's starting to come loose. Hold on. ”  Lapis reaches forward, pulling it free the rest of the way before she quickly redoes the whole part entirely. In seconds, it's been redone.  “ There we go! Good as new. ”

Lapis smiles, taking a step back. 

“ I snuck in a little guy in there for you too if you wanna reach up and take a look. ”

Conveniently, the two of them are right next to a set of reflective silverware. Hortensia's reflection would show that as Lapis was doing so, she had tucked one of her turtle charms into the ribbon.

-- HORTENSIA HARDLY HAS THE presence of mind to collect herself before Lapis has stepped in to do the greatest deed a girl can do: helping someone else out before their fit becomes an absolute fashion disaster. Truly, Hortensia almost feels tears swelling up in her eyes as she fans herself.

"Aww, Lapis! Thank youuu." She puckers her mouth a little, sighing overdramatically, then perking up as Lapis mentions the little guy. She begins groping around only to belatedly notice the silverware, catching sight of her reflection and the turtle charm added within.

"Oh! These lil' charm thingies- the whole idea is so fun!" Hortensia cups her head gently and faux-swoons. "I lovelove the idea of making jewelry that everyone gets to partake in... it's a cute way of keeping the memories."

"But favors beget favors! A lovely treat for you as well~!" In one swift motion, she removes a pearl from the pouch by her side, holding it between her fingers towards Lapis. "Consider yourself one of the lucky few to get a perfect pearl from Princess Hortensia! A momento that'll only increase rapidly in value as time moves forward- though, of course, it's priceless to begin with!"

[lilchxrmer]

— ROSADO IS QUICK ON his feet- a fact that has both served to delight and reassure Hortensia for as long as she has known the boy. She takes the charm from him with a beaming smile, holds it up to the light for a moment, and slides it onto the bracelet at her wrist.

“Uhm- yeah, ugh, it sucks.” Zelkov’s fluffing of her hair had kept her mind off of it somewhat, but even after that and redoing her makeup, her dress clung to her like a spiderweb. It was less flattering than she would’ve liked, but she still think she made it work.

“It’s okay~ Honestly, given how desperate the Viscount has been to remedy this mess, I considered leveraging this as a chance to get some new cute foreign attire…! But I’m the bigger person.” She finishes the statement with a huff, patting down her chest.

As Rosado continues on, she glances back at her recently-acquired jewelry. “This year?” she hums. “I didn’t realize they did the bracelet thing every year… though I suppose it makes sense. It’s a cute tradition!” She jingles her wrist around, humming to herself. “I wanna keep a momento of this place, so I’d really like to consider it… or maybe I’m just trying too hard. But because I’ve gotten this many, it’s obvious I care, so it’ll be embarrassing if I don’t complete it!! At least, that’s the thought.”

If her flourish is used to hide some other uncomfortable feelings that might be bubbling under the surface, Hortensia hides it well enough to the average passerby. Whether or not Rosado is aware of her father’s return, whether or not he’d hide it from her if so… for now, Hortensia is perfectly sweet on the idea of ignoring whatever that might entail. Perhaps, if she plays her cards right, she’ll be privy to whatever it is adults mean when they say they ‘drink their cares away’.

She leans forward in trepidation as Rosado’s voice lowers, her heart bouncing around at his proposal. “Woah…! You’re good,” she whispers back. “You’re right… not many could withstand the strength of the two cutest people here!”

Thus saying, she nods to herself and offers Rosado a firm handshake. 

[ CHAMPAGNE ]

-- IT IS WITH UTTER seriousness that Hortensia paces the length of the bar, tip to tail with her finger tugging under her chin. It has been stated quite clearly: students are only allowed one (1) glass, which means that she is only allowed one (1) type of bottle. One chance at one flavor.

But it is- at least proclaimed to be- seventy of Adrestia's best! What a crime it was, completely, to rob her of the opportunity! Only one? She didn't care about the drunkedness of it all, she just wanted the taste! She was weak to delicacies as expensive as her wardrobe, and drink was no exception.

But only one... she hums to herself, so lost in thought that she almost barges directly into Rosado. By the dragons' graces, she catches sight of him beforehand, stopping short and letting out a small gasp.

"Rosado! Perfect timing. You're- uhm. Okay, still a student. But what should I pick!" She extends her hands exasperatedly, motioning at the bottles across the bar. "Do you know anything about this kinda stuff? I just want something... sweet! Are any of them fun? Pink? Expensive?"

"Oh, and uhm! Before I forget." Hortensia digs into the soaked folds of her dress to pull out one of her perfectly round and cutieful pearl charms. She holds it out to Rosado with a smile. "I really wanna make sure I get my bracelet done before the night is over! I know everyone's kinda glum with the storm, but... I still want a cute little trinket! You get it. So trade with me?"

"HORTENSIA!" HE BURSTS OUT RIGHT AFTER⠀✩⠀she shouts his name, tit for tat. perfect timing? oh, she means the drinks. for a second, he'd been worried something'd happened. "hmmm. . . well, all of them look pretty expensive." and that's no lie. but then, he wouldn't say he was really an expert on prices and that kind of thing, since he tended to spend whatever he had. oops.

opal eyes snap back to her when the subject changes again, and it's only then as she reaches into her dress that he realizes she's totally soaked! "oh no, hortensia, you got all wet and everything——!" he starts to whine, but she shoves right past that and presents a gleaming pearl for him to take instead. figures she wouldn't let a bit of water get in the way of whatever she wanted.

"yeah, yeah, i get it." willingly, he plucks a five-pointed crustacean⠀(⠀were starfishes crustaceans? starfishes? starfi?⠀)⠀from his fashionable! stylish! charm ring!! that he'd made just for the occasion and purpose, and passes it over in exchange. "are you close to finishing yours? honestly, i haven't been paying that much attention this year with the beach and the storm and everything. i should get on it."

"oh, but you wanted a drink! weeell, they are just doing it on scout's honor, you know." the winning grin and wink he gives her is two parts mischief and one part whimsy——come on, what could be so bad if they got a second one! "what you can do is just wait for the bartender to change," he lowers his voice, whispering with hand cupped against her ear, "i think they swap every hour or so."

then he pulls back, like they were having a totally normal conversation. "honestly? you should try the watermelon boat with me. it's a coconut-y mixed drink served in a watermelon shell instead of a glass, good for two."

"between the two of us giving our best puppy eyes, there's no way they could say no, right?"

[lilchxrmer]

-- HORTENSIA, DESPITE HERSELF, VISIBLY relaxes at Leif's concession. That's right. Even as an Emblem- or, no, even as a human, he held the same relatable quality as beforehand. Maybe that's why it's so easy to talk to him, if unfair. To her, it feels like they're just picking up right where they left off.

"Ah! You get it! It's, er." She flaps her hands. "When you're royalty, it's hard! Everyone's looking up to you and stuff! If you say the wrong thing, you could cause a whole incident... and if you look ugly, it could ruin trade relationships!"

She muses. "I, uhm... I obviously like looking cute, but it takes a lot of effort to be the cutest!" She pokes her cheeks. "If I'm alone, I don't have to worry about that. And- we don't really go under the water, per se, but when it's cold enough and the ice is thick, we can skate on it."

She spreads her arms out to the side, as if soaring. "It's nice, actually! It was kinda scary the first time, 'cause I thought I would fall through, but it's similar to flying... except you're on the ground! And it's all slippery! There aren't many places where you can stand and have everything be as empty and alone as can be..."

The vaguely melancholy look that's gathered on her brow is quickly chased away as she moves to wag a finger instead. "But! 'cause I'm with you, you already know how cute I am! So if I frown or pout or make some otherwise less-than-cutieful expressions, it's not gonna change your opinion any which way!"

Thus satisfied, she lets her gaze trail over to the lanterns that Leif has brought them near. "If I could," she says when the daze has broken over her. "It'd be nice..."

Her fingertips trail over the lantern's outer shell. It's- well, she doesn't know exactly what she expected, but the waxiness wasn't quite it. Perhaps more like a petal? Regardless, it feels more like a candle than anything else. The newfound familiarity of the once-strange object teases her smile wider.

"It's so pretty," she breathes. "I bet you've seen loads of them, if you're going to these foreign parties all the time."

out somewhere else

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025:  first half.

[lilchxrmer]

[ TOWEL ]

It would be a little too fortunate for the ball to pass completely without incident, perhaps. Zelkov is not entirely surprised that the weather has taken a turn for the worse, but he is a little concerned. There are a lot of people who have put care into their appearances that will now find their make-up ruined and their clothes weighing twice as much, if not more.

He’s on damage control, in a sense. As Hortensia re-enters the estate, Zelkov is there with a towel. He doesn’t exactly ask for permission, before he begins attempting to dry her hair.

“My apologies, Princess Hortensia,” he says. “I hope the rain has not ruined your dress. You still look quite cute.”

— THE DOUR MOOD THAT had seemed intent on plaguing every bit of Hortensia’s life is- no, not brought to a stop, but certainly aided by the sudden appearance of her sister’s retainer. “Ah! Zelkov. Aww, that’s sweet,” she says, taking the towel with a smile. She carefully dabs at her face with dainty fingers, sniffling slightly from the cold. 

“It’s okay… I’m just trying to think of it as, like, uhm. A painting set! Or something.” She strikes a pose, peace sign in one hand as the other grabs the towel towards her waist. “Have you seen those illustrations, of women dancing around under the waves, like mermaids? Could never happen in Elusia, ‘cause everything’s so cold, but I can pretend… that this is how it would feel afterwards! Ehe…”

The silliness of the statement seems to occur to her retroactively, and she pulls herself back in. “Anyway, thanks. It’s all wet, but you can have one of m- ah-CHOO!”

The charm she had been reaching to give Zelkov- a pearl as small and cute as herself- skitters across the floor as she sneezes. Just to add insult to injury, and all.

[lilchxrmer]

[ LANTERNS ]

Ivy does not know how to broach the topic with Hortensia. She thumbs a petal on her lantern, feeling the waxy material between her fingers as she mulls over how to break the news.

Silence lapses between them, ebbing like the waves on the shore.

“You look darling, Hortensia. Lovely as always.” Ivy says at last, an affectionate smile gracing her mien. No matter what transpires in the backdrop of their lives, her sister’s presence is a comforting, constant presence. She is grateful for it, always. She gestures to the lanterns. “Pretty, aren’t they?”

She turns the lantern over in her hands. “I think of what you said at Solm Castle often. About—about father. About being family again. You were under Zephia’s influence, as I recall, but it still…” A soft exhale. “...I should not cling to such sentiments. We should not, really. And for the longest time, ever since that mess at Florra Port, I believed I to be past it. Father’s shadow.”

She turns to Hortensia. “But I have seen him again. Here, in the flesh.” She shakes her head, expression hardening. “I know not what to make of it. I came to tell you. To ensure that you are alright—that you will be alright.”

She turns her lantern over. “Your safety and happiness is paramount to me, Hortensia. Whatever reason father—or whatever he may be—has for being… back, I will not let harm befall you. I swear it.”

She reaches over and tucks a stray lock of hair behind Hortensia’s ear. “But come, let us not allow such revelations to sour the night. Have you decided on what to wish for?”

-- IVY DROPS THE REVELATION onto Hortensia like- well, she does give it the grandiose it deserves, setting the stage and building up to it all clean-and-nicely.

But there is no amount of buildup that can parallel to the impossible, no amount of context that can leave Hortensia with anything more than an utterly dumbfounded gape and a heart that seems ripe to hammer out of her chest.

Your dead father is back.

All this coping, tossing and turning, living that she has gone through this past year has been for- what. He's back? As simple as that? Hortensia doesn't have context- doesn't have the wherewithal to even comprehend how such a thing could be. Nothing less than a giant practical joke that everyone was playing on her. All those bits and jokes about 'drawing the curtain back and hey, he's fine!' turning out to be real.

Ivy's voice comes back in like a buzz from far off. I will not let harm befall you, and its only then that it occurs to Hortensia that it might be a bad thing.

Of course- the last time she saw him he was puppeteered and fake, a corpse to be paraded around and slammed through her chest with. This could be the same, or similar, or worse.

"Yeah," she says dimly, as if from far off. "Uhm. Won't let it ruin my night, ha. Ha."

A wish. Ivy asks it and Hortensia tries to gather herself enough for it. A wish, a wish... she swallows the lump down her throat, and settles on: "Just... having a good night. Good year! Productive school year and all that." She strains through a smile. "Same as ever!"

[lilchxrmer]

-- THE EAGERNESS WITH WHICH Leif leaps to the task is both surprising and amusing enough to Hortensia that she has to bite back a delighted laugh, if only for fear of appearing mocking.

"Aw, you got your shoes all wet for me! Even in ballroom attire? What a gentleman," and she reaches over to pat one of his hands, touch light enough to only just graze. "Careful! That's the sorta thing bad people take advantage of. Unless it's intentional? In which case..."

She trails off. This is an Emblem- of course he knows better than her, that she is accomplishing nothing more than being rude. And uncharming. She titters the thought away, flapping her hands in the air.

"Uhm, forget about that! Poor joke. The lanterns would be great- unless, do you think we'll get burnt? In Elusia, most of the water was just frozen solid, unless it was in some trade port. No real fun in tossing lanterns through trade ships or onto ice... or maybe it would be? Not like I've tried!"

She laughs again. "But nope, didn't have any real idea on where to go... sorry if that's disappointing, especially when you leapt so dashingly to save me. There just weren't many places for peace of mind, and this seemed the best option."

The lights from the ballroom dance across the water, mingling with the lanterns' glow, and so Hortensia gestures at it. "Not that I'm not having fun," she clarifies. "Just it's. Uhm," and her hands fly defensively across her chest, "you were out wandering the beach too, so you get it!"

out somewhere else

         ⤷   ethereal ball 2025:  first half.

[lilchxrmer]

-- "HUH? O-OBVIOUSLY!! I'M AMAZING at everything I try."

That's the first thing out of her mouth, bright and bold and so overcompensating it might as well have been shouted from the Somniel's rooftops. Her voice has the cadence of daring, as if coaxing Diamant into challenging her claim, even if he just praised her.

But her arms are careful, and her hands are even more so. Rocking gently, repeating that same motion as though her body's picked it up while her mind races to catch up.

"Though," she says, quieter now- casually, like she's trying to downplay something, "I guess it's kinda nice? Not that I'd ever-" want one, is the finished sentence, but she hesitates. Would her wanting matter? If Ivy was too busy for this sort of thing, then continuing the royal bloodline would be delegated to-

The doll's head shifts against her shoulder. She adjusts.

"It's just a lot of responsibility," she continues on without tripping. "You've got to be the person someone trusts first. Like, before they even know what a 'you' is. You're just- there. Like some big, reliable blurry shape that knows how to make the scary noises stop."

Her voice trails into stillness, and Hortensia doesn't quite realize how absentminded her rocking has become until her fingers cramp. She adjusts once more, glancing towards Diamant and trying very hard to look unimpressed. "But not like we need all of that for a grade," she continues on. "Thank goodness! If we were flunked 'cause we didn't get some gooey emotional awakening or whatever I'd know I'd have to leave this place."

She sticks her nose up. As if she hadn't just said all that. Her nose crinkles, like the idea is somehow insulting. Her gaze drifts back to Diamant, weighing his words.

"Do you think that makes it easier?" she asks, stepping back in the conversation abruptly. "Growing up with that kind of... expectation. But also that kind of support. Knowing who you're gonna be from the start? I figured that if in Elusia I needed to be above and beyond the rest in school just to stand out, in Brodia it must've been something else entirely. But I guess not..."

wanted & wasted

+ faith

[lilchxrmer]

-- "HOSTED IN THE WEST cloister's open-air courtyard. Monastery staff and students welcome to participate!"

...the flyer wasn't cute.

That was the first thing Hortensia noticed when she spotted it stuck to the village's announcement board- slightly crooked, handwritten, and absolutely hideous in layout. She'd sniffed and walked past before she finished reading it the first time, but then circled back five minutes later, smoothing the wrinkles with both hands and a frown.

A dyeing workshop.

Hortensia doesn't make clothes, she wears them. It is a skill she's desired but has let pass her by, favoring the latter half of the 'making herself look perfect' process and trusting that Elusia's weavers could do their job. But she understood the concepts.

She had to- her ensembles didn't just, well, ensemble themselves. She had an eye for detail, for what made fabric pop, for the difference between a soft blush pink and one that just looked washed out. If she relied on Elusian weavers to do the actual execution, that didn't mean she wasn't capable.

Now felt like a good time to prove that.

So she showed up early. Of course.

Hair pinned, sleeves rolled to her elbows in a rare moment of practicality, Hortensia perched on a little stool with a basin of warm water in front of her and a bundle of raw fabric tied into an experimental swirl. The workshop had set out bowls of crushed berries, chopped roots, and powdered minerals, all labeled in neat little signs.

Her face twitches at the beetroot.

"Too muddy," she whispers to herself, already reaching for something purple instead- lapis pigment, according to the card. The workshop leader was still explaining things at the front, something about binding and fabric tension, but Hortensia was already in the zone.

This was going to be cute. She was going to make it cute, even if she didn't know exactly what she was doing. And she attacks the task with... passion, at the very least, soaking it in colors that she thought looked nice.

And then: a presence.

The worst kind of presence. The sort that didn't announce itself so much as ooze into the corner of her vision, thick as fog and cloying and nauseating. Her smile tightens like a bowstring.

"...ugh," she mutters under her breath. "Why is he here?"

Griss, just out of the corner of her eye. Wasn't this trip supposed to be for Golden Deer? Had he transferred in? In which case, Hortensia needed a ticket out of this class, fast. She doesn't even know if he's noticed her- can't even tell exactly what he's doing.

Surely it wasn't for this class. Heck, the guy didn't wear a shirt half the time. Perhaps, if she kept her head down and her hands focused, he'd just leave.

@twistedisciple

nothing you could teach me

verdant rain moon; dye prompt

[lilchxrmer]

-- "AH, YOUR HOMETOWN!" HORTENSIA'S hand covers her mouth in a small gasp before she flutters them by her side. "Ehe, sorry~! Look at me, projecting my homesickness on ya. Well, so long as it's fashionable, I'm listening." She folds her legs under her and her hands on top of Rosado's, every inch of the perfect-student the Academy shaped her up to be.

She nods along to Rosado's comments. He says everything that is familiar: that she is adorable, that they're together. It's enough to have her chest feeling warm again.

"Potential's good," she settles on. "Potential's everything! You're right," she decides upon, "if we're to fix up everything else around here, then some cute little flowers brightening up a room is a leap in the right direction. Well done as always!"

And the night goes on. They talk about things that make Hortensia's heart feel lighter and her head more distant. She considers beads in her hair and goes back and forth, lets her nails get painted with delightfully detailed flossflowers. It is a departure from everything else that has happened outside this room.

The candle burns lower. Hortensia's words have started coming slower, stretched out between yawns and the occasional too-long blink. She makes it very clear she's not tired.

Not that tired, anyway.

She's still sitting up when her head tips against Rosado's shoulder for just a second too long. The texture is enough to have her jerking back upright, embarrassed, before she scrunches her nose and flops sideways on the bed in dramatic defeat.

"Ughhh. This is nice," she says, in complete juxtaposition to her moans and expression, "for once. I just wish it was..." an embarrassingly long yawn, "easier. To feel a lil' less guilty falling asleep... I'm so tired." Another pause. "All the time."

She doesn't elaborate, but she doesn't get up either. Within minutes, her breathing evens out. Her body curls in tight- habit more than comfort- and sleep slips up around her like a tide.

It doesn't last.

The room smells of nail polish and crushed petals, soft and cloying into the evening air. The wind moves past their window like it's searching for something- rattling the floorboards and sinking out what little comfort they've managed to pull together in this space. When Hortensia's breath stutters, the hush of night has already been broken.

She wakes up with a gasp she doesn't mean to make- sharp, sudden, sucked between her teeth as if she could swallow it back.

But it has escaped. Her chest rises fast, then faster. Her fingers twitch where they've twisted the blanket into something wrinkled and tangled, and for an eternity that lasts seconds or years, she lays there. Her eyes are wide open, but they don't see the room, only afterimages: fire-lit halls, monastery ash in her throat, her father's voice dissolving into nothing.

She bites the inside of her cheek hard enough to anchor herself, and it works. Kind of. She's read enough therapy-theory books to know the 'focus on stuff around you and wave anxiety attacks goodbye' philosophy, but it doesn't make this moment any easier.

She turns her head slowly, just enough to see the silhouette beside her. Rosado's silhouette is there. She can't tell if he's woken up or not, but she's afraid, somehow, to break that.

And yet.

Hortensia closes her eyes, scrunches them close and tries to fight back the panic that had followed her into the world of the waking. Her hand shifts, just slightly. Closer to his.

Not touching. But close enough that if- she wanted to, she could wind her fingers into his. She is afraid her desperation would betray her if she did, that she wouldn't know how to let go, even when the trembling stopped and the tightness in her chest loosened.

She stays still.

together nothing goes as planned

horsebow moon; roommates prompt.

[lilchxrmer]

-- HORTENSIA'S ALL DOWN FOR the idea of helping. That's basically textbook for her, at this point: melded nicely with every frustrating thing that's gone wrong in her life is the hot, brand new coping mechanism of be the bucket! Help the lady pick up her dropped groceries, offer to hold a ladder still, the gist is all there.

She's not going to kill herself over it- Hortensia knows her life is worth its weight in gold, and it is not hers to spend- but she is going to give it the ol' academy try. Particularly if the Academy itself (or the Church, speaking through it) pushes her towards the idea. Be nice to them! they had more or less cooed, sending her and her classmates on the way. Get to know them! It's the neighborly thing.

Like Hortensia knows how to talk to neighbors. In her experience, neighbors have meant: war, or trade. She came to this place with the sole purpose of learning how to do otherwise, and look where this has gotten her.

But she doesn't mind. Start small, yes, okay. The day-to-day pieces of a village are nice, and even if the cloying crevices and lack of sunlight remind her all too much of the horrid catacombs she had found herself lost within just a few months prior, its still decidedly not that. People are here by at least some choice of their own rather than torturous necessity, and-

"Lapis!" Hortensia swings her arms around the girl's waist for the second time that morning. Yes, the also-pink girl was here, too, and a persistent enough presence that Hortensia has held conversation with her several times during her stay here. In fact, they had helped each other just a few hours prior, tackling a particularly annoying task.

"What'd you have for lunch! I've been sampling the different cuisines here and- okay, maybe cuisine is a strong word. Food. It's regional!" She clasps her hands together, humming as she looks upwards. "They were these lovely little orange scones, and if you haven't tried them yet, I'd really recommend..."

She trails off, taking stock of Lapis' appearance. It is... well. Not any less disheveled than it had been the last time she saw her, to say the very least.

"Lapis," she says in the same sweet tone. "You did have lunch, right?"

@lazulienne

we don't have time for that

verdant rain moon; authority prompt

[lilchxrmer]

"Hortensia?"

Goldmary approaches her friend and princess with some urgency, though not so much as to seem desperate—she knew that the other girl was ultimately fine, but still worried for her state after the battle. A small kit in hand, she flips it open, pulling out a makeup brush.

"Well, you seem alright... now, makeup check?"

She gives the princess an appraising look over. "Loss or no, that doesn't mean you can't keep dazzling the room. I'm sure the people hurt or disappointed over their own losses will appreciate your sparkling smile."

Her expression softens, "I know I always have."

-- TO SAY THAT HORTENSIA is sometimes less than the most adorable she could be is like, just realistic. The way she sees it, every day has a different adora-meter max that she can meet, and sometimes, on these bloodiest of days, its a little lower!

Nooo worries, it can't be as bad as any of those Catacomb days, now, can it? Always an opportunity for her to strive a little harder to make people love her, is all.

Doesn't mean she's not gonna try her darnedest to meet that mark, arms squished to the side and face turned primly towards the attendant forced to tend to her. She might not have gotten it as bad as those of her allies that actually got knocked out, sure, but the scrapes she fares still warrant some-

"G-Goldmary! You're... you're back!"

Any sort of mark on her pride that could have affected Hortensia is dashed to the side as she leaps towards Goldmary, sending medkit and makeup both flying as she stuffs her face into the taller girl.

"Ugh... does that mean you saw me look a little less cutieful than usual? Blargh." She squeezes Goldmary's arms a little tighter. "And in front of that awful boy who thinks I'm lame... ugh! Well, whatever."

She pulls her face out and fans it, smiling sweetly at Goldmary. "You're right! I do serve as wonderful moral support. And with you here, there's not a single Golden Deer who won't have their hearts swelling! We've gotta make sure Rosado feels supported, after all!"

A pause. "Buuuuuut. Yeah. Uhm," and she leans over to pick up her mess, "a makeup check would be nice. Ehe."

[lilchxrmer]

-- ANOTHER HIT FROM THE swordswoman is enough to get Hortensia more frustrated than anything else. At least the blow does not feel like it shatters against her the same way the first one had- and she's expecting to get thwacked upside the head once more for her troubles.

And then! And then! There goes the woman, skipping on past Hortensia as if it were nothing.

"I- excuse me! You can't just hit me and run off!" Legs shaking or not, Hortensia's only so-much for patheticness, and she does not want to take a blow from the boy from the catacombs. No, if she's going to be taken down, let it be by someone who intends to finish the job.

"Afraid of facing the weight of your crimes? Of hurting my adorable little face? Well you should be!" Thus saying so, she chases after the swordswoman, staff gripped tightly in her hand. "Come on!"

Hortensia 2.5/7HP moves the Golden Deer team to the left! New positions: Ayra Felix Lambert Hortensia Leonardo Lukas

@wolfhednn

no bargains between lions and deer.

Battle of the Eagle and Lion 2025: Round 1, Battle 3

[lilchxrmer]

-- ...OR SO HORTENSIA SAYS, but her legs still quiver under the weight of her wounds- bruises, she mentally corrects herself. She's well aware of what actual pain is, thanks to the lovely little sprints she's had to voyage through just two months prior, and a little shove from a fellow student is hardly that.

But she's tired, and she's not too proud to admit such.

"Hey, can you handle it?" she calls out to Leonardo, holding herself back. "If you can keep yourself together, I can keep on healing you as long as I stand! So, uhm..."

A pause.

"I'll continue doing that from here! Yep!"

Hortensia 4/7HP skips her turn.

@wolfhednn

no bargains between lions and deer.

Battle of the Eagle and Lion 2025: Round 1, Battle 3