twisted wonderland 3rd years + shoujo au đ”âđ«
trey clover
drum roll please⊠presenting trey clover!!! the beloved captain of your high schoolâs baseball team!!! have you seen him? heâs so kind, and thoughtful⊠heâs really handsome and tall⊠lord⊠have you seen him in his baseball uniform?? his broad shoulders under the gentle light⊠all the girls are giggling about it!
youâve also often found yourself following the smell of delicious baked goods⊠only to find the infamous trey clover handing pastries out to his entire team!! he can cook too?! you drool at the thought of tasting his already amazing-smelling food.
unfortunately, you and him are on different social levels. have you seen him? heâs constantly surrounded by people! the thought of even trying his food is out the window⊠nevertheless talking to him. youâre more quieter, with a solid, but small group of friends.
that doesnât mean you or your friends arenât a fan of him! every time thereâs a baseball practice going on afterschool, the bleachers are filled with students alike, wanting to watch their favourite caption (+ the other members, ace and deuce are pretty popular too!) itâs often full of people so you havenât gotten the chance to fully watch a practice game yet⊠not until a freezing winter afternoon.
there you were, at the front of the bleachers, with the best view youâve gotten of any game so far! although cold and shivering, itâs fun to sit with you friends and watch them practice! although your eyes often stray to trey, itâs not like youâre not watching the other members of the team! youâve talked to deuce before, heâs pretty nice! you wave at him sheepishly while rubbing your shoulders, trying to keep yourself warm.
trey clover is really nice as the rumours say. heâs been watching you the entire time, seeing you shivering, with rosy cheeks and a flushed expression, giggling and laughing with your friends. youâre like a lost puppy! something tugged at his heart in worry, youâre obviously cold.
during break, the other girls watched in envy as trey himself comes up to you and offers you his own scarf! wow! you and your friends silently cheer at the offer. trey couldnât help but smile. how could the oh-so lovely trey clover not? he loves taking care of his classmates! whether theyâre friends or not.
he waves it off, saying you can return it to him tomorrow. you smile at him, and clutch onto the scarf in gratefulness. trey is really a great guy! perhaps you have a chance at becoming friends with him�
the next day, you bravely march towards trey, only to immediately turn back after seeing him surrounded by a bunch of people. uh oh. maybe youâd return the scarf to him another time. thereâs too many people and you were afraid that youâll get overwhelmed from the staring eyes.
the same thing happened the day after. then the day after that. this goes on for a month or so, until you and him get partnered for a project.
trey was confused the entire time. heâs seen you approach him and then promptly walk away. he though it was cute, but he didnât understand why you couldnât just give it to him.
you explained how you got nervous, seeing him surrounded by so many people, and finally gave him the scarf back on a quiet afternoon at the library, mid-science project. he chuckled and heartily accepted this. hence you made a new friend!
trey never seemed to be aware that heâs often surrounded by many people at almost all times. now that you (lowkey) knocked him into reality, he often found himself suddenly alone. trey liked his friends, as well as his alone time. but maybe he was too alone at the moment because he slowly seemed to be attaching himself to you. you were so much more comfortable, definitely less overwhelming compared to being surrounded by so much people. heâs starting to enjoy your company now.
you, however, seemed to be confused as to why heâs suddenly following you. itâs trey clover weâre talking about! the schoolâs prince charmingâŠ!!!
when you asked him, he simply said it was a nice change of pace. what does that even mean??? does he perhapsâŠ? no!! thereâs no way!!! you shake your head, panic-stricken. stop being delusional!!!
one crisp morning, trey found you with bandages all over your fingers. are you okay??? what happened??? did you get in a fight??? did you study too hard???
you shake your head, flustered. âitâs not a big dealâ you say, smiling. âjust some accidents in the kitchen. itâs well taken care of.â
trey sighs. maybe he should start helping you in the kitchen⊠I mean, he considers himself a pretty decent cook⊠and he hasnât baked a sweet treat for you yet!
a while later, as trey started getting gifts from all kinds of people did he start connecting the dots. thatâs right⊠todayâs valentineâs day! you probably injured yourself trying to making something for the guy you wanted to confess to. he chuckled. you shouldâve just asked him and he wouldâve helped you no problem! maybe you just felt shy to ask because he was also a guyâŠ
he tried looking for you, wanting to ask about who this special someone is, only to find you to be nowhere. huh. thatâs odd. you were at school this morning⊠right?!
confused, dazed and guilty about rejecting all those girls today, he opened to his shoe locker to find a cute bag with a bow on it fall to the ground.
he only receives outright confession, never quiet, secret ones like this. this is almost likeâŠ
his eyes widen and his ears flush red as he reads your confession letter. oh. he thinks. oh dear.
taking a bite out of your heart shaped cookie, he feels a cavity already forming. itâs too sweet! but no matter, heâll throughly brush his teeth when he gets home⊠the only thing on his mind walking home is finishing your (kinda failure?) baked goods and wondering how he should tell you he feels the same way⊠maybe baking you something too?
cater diamond
selfie, after selfie, after selfie⊠you mindlessly scroll on cater diamondâs magicam. heâs so photogenic itâs insane. the light always seems to hit the right angle, his eyes are gleaming and childlike⊠heâs smiling⊠so handsome.
your finger has hovered over the âmessageâ button on his profile many times, but you sigh to yourself. he probably gets hundreds of dms a day. youâre probably just another number to his follower count. also, hitting someone up online? thatâs super unromantic.
youâve seen cater at school a bunch of times. heâs always taking pictures or flirting with some girl whoâs ten times more prettier than you. you have no chance at all! the local celebrity has no time for the likes of you!!!
heâs fun, heâs loud, heâs eccentric⊠heâs so interesting! you would love to get to know this side of him. little did you knowâŠ
you were shuffling through books in the school library during lunch. you forgot to do an assignment and had to hurry before your next class⊠only to find cater diamond, slumped in a corner, asleep!
it just so happens that the book you wanted was right beside him. as you try to slowly pull the book out, he wakes up. oh no.
he stares at you, wide eyed, before dazing out and leaning his head back. you slowly sat beside him and flipped through the pages, eating your lunch and finishing up your assignment. it was well needed peace and quiet for cater.
that night, you opened your phone to find a pleasant surprise.
cater diamond started following you.
youâve find to notice a pattern. during lunch, cater could always be at the library, slumped and dazed. no one comes here during lunchtime, except for students who could care less about the mini-celebrity cater diamond. you always assumed he went out to buy food with his friends during lunchtime. guess not.
every now and then, you say beside him silently, eating your lunch and scrolling on your phone. sometimes, heâd strike up a conversation about the latest student gossip, or an assignment he didnât quite fully understand. but most of the time, it was just comfortable silence.
those âevery now and thenâ turned to everyday. youâd rarely hang outside of lunchtime, due to both of you being caught up in your own social lives, but it was nice nonetheless.
âisnât it weird?â cater asks one day.
you lift your head up from your phone. âweird what?â
âyouâve see. my social media posts. isnât it weird that Iâm so antisocial here? we rarely even talk.â
you shrug. âI donât mind. I think youâre great either way.â
cater turned his head towards you. âreally? you think Iâm great?â
âIâd love to know the fun, wild cater, but I also love the quiet, peaceful cater too.â
âyou love it?â
âI love it.â
âwell⊠I love you.â
leona kingscholar
you couldnât understand how you could hate someone so much without knowing them all that well, but you did.
leona kingscholar, the snobby rich kid.
youâve seen his name when grades are posted. and itâs at the very bottom. he sleeps in class (plus, he sits right next to you! how annoying, he snores.) and is rude to almost everybody.
to your horror, he has fans.
youâve seen parades of girls chase after him during valentines, love letters pile up in his desk, people asking you to send him love confessions on behalf of them. of course, youâre too kind to say no, and deliver the message anyway, only to be rudely scoffed at when you tell them that leona brushed it off.
you, however, manage to keep an outstanding vibe to yourself. you manage to keep good grades, be nice to everyone, have interesting hobbies and talents⊠youâre a pretty all-round person (as you say)
because of your good impression and responsibility youâve shown and given to your teachers did they ask you to do some extra credit stuff. to your pleasure, you agreed. except you dropped your books when you found out that the extra credit thing is tutoring leona kingscholar.
âIâm so glad that youâre able to do this. Iâm very worried about dear leona, especially considering his home life. I hope you can take good care of him.â
you smile meekly. of course teacher! what couldnât you do? the easy going, impressionable student!
your ears did pique interested when your teacher mentioned his home life⊠but whatâs that to you anyway? you lost interest quickly.
the clock was ticking and the workbooks between you and leona was pristine and untouched. the desk that separated you two was the only thing that seemed to prevent you from mauling him on the spot.
his hair looked well-kept and clean. his clothes neat and tidy, his bone structure⊠you shook your head. well, obviously he is handsome. how else does he have all those girls tailing him despite his hideous personality? you friends were excited to see how this âdateâ (you rolled your eyes) would go. I mean, it is leona kingscholar after all.
although you call him the snobby rich kid, was is the presidentâs son. or well, used to be. his father stepped down from presidency and leonaâs brother, falena, recently won the election from charisma alone.
when you watched him on tv, you scoffed. the kingscholar handsome genes seemed to be going strong, thatâs probably what helped falena earn his spot because he is in no way a good politician. falenaâs promises hasnât been met yet, his main concerns benefited the rich (classic classismâ no pun intended) and he laughed heartily at almost anything. It made him look pathetic.
as you eyed leona dozing off, you laughed to yourself. at least heâs not president, you thought.
you flicked his forehead. you watched leona flinch and frown. he had this boyish charm to him that made you wanna laugh at everything he does. you chuckled when he glared at you.
âwhat?â he hissed. meow.
âwhat do you want to start off with?â you spun the pencil in between your fingers.
leona rubbed his forehead and shuffled through his books and pulled out a math book. âyeah. this one.â
âhow much do you want?â leona asked.
âwhat?â
âmoney. for you to do the work for me.â
âI donât want money. I want honest work.â
âeveryone wants money.â
âput your wallet away.â
leona stated at you, dumbstruck, and put his wallet away as you instructed.
âugh snobby rich kids and their money.â you whispered loud enough for him to hear.
âherbivore.â
what kind of insult is that?!
days went by like this. arguing, no work done, leaving frustrated. you still refused to accept money. that would put weight on your conscience. you simply couldnât.
one day, you started stuffing your face with your lunch that you didnât have time to eat during school.
leona eyed your food. âlunch? after school? itâs almost 4pm.â
âaugh. I know. I donât feel like eating that much but that means I have to have this again for lunch tomorrow.â
leona took your lunch box and started picking food out and throwing it into his mouth.
âhey!â
âwhat? you said you donât feel like eating.â
you calmed back down and watched him eat. âare you sure youâre okay with eating that? I donât wanna displease mr. moneyâs food palatte.â
leona shrugged. âI donât eat much at home.â
oh?
âwhy?â you asked
âdadâs busy with our dear president. their politic discussion is so annoying. I donât feel like eating with them.â
you scoffed. âpolitics? are you sure? whatever Iâm hearing from falena sounds like a bunch of bullcrap and rich-guy charisma.â
you hadnât had the chance to realize what you had said when leona let out a laugh. âI know, right? sick of shit presidents. my dad wonât even listen to me.â
ââoh your brotherâs older, he knows betterââ leona said in a mocking tone. âI dunno why heâs always on the birthing order crap.â leona handed you back your empty lunchbox. âyouâre not a bad cook.â
you stared at him. youâve never seen him talk this much in one go. leona seemed to have noticed it himself and coughed.
the next few days went by, a bit more awkward than usual. it was mostly you and him in silence. the arguing seemed to have died down.
since you couldnât get him to do any work, you decided to catch up on your own.
to your pleasant surprise, leona was helping you! whenever he saw you were stuck on a math question, or a science formula, or any of the sort, heâd watch and explain it to you. you swore he has the lowest grades in the school. how does he know more than you?
leona shrugged. âI can do things if I put my mind to it.â
you slammed your hand on your desk. smiling in thought. as of late, you and leona started getting along better. his smarts made you grow some sort of respect for him.
âif you at least pass all your exams this term, Iâll do anything you ask.â
leona raised an eyebrow. âwhat?â
âwell, you can do all of this right? all you need is a motivator.â you smiled. âweâve been bantering back and forth this entire time. donât you want me to stop calling you spoiled? please agree to to this. I really, really want this credit.â
leona pretended to be in thought before nodding. âyeah whatever.â
inner hooray!
weeks went by. leona seemed to have actually started doing his work, handing in assignments, raising his gradeâŠ
until he carefully placed multiple tests in front of you with a bright red 100 on the top of each and every one.
âI told you I could do it if I put my mind to it.â
you patted yourself. âI finally trained the animal.â
he ruffled your hair.
the next day, you were getting ready for another afterschool session with leona when your teacher came up to you.
âleonaâs grades has been doing so well. Iâm glad you were able to put him on track. I added the extra credit on your record. you deserve a break, you can stop tutoring him now.â
oh⊠right. all of this had to come to a stop eventually.
you went home earlier that day, and suddenly found yourself with so much more free time.
the next few days went by, with no leona in sight. the distaste you usually had for him seemed to wither away⊠you kind of considered each other as friends. would it be too mushy to say you missed him?
one warm afternoon, at the end of school, you were heading to grab your shoes and leave when a familiar voice called out your name.
leona.
âoh⊠hi!â you smiled at him. you really, truly didnât hate him anymore. all of that seemed to be so far ago.
leona spoke in a gruff. âhey⊠soâŠ.â
you knew leona was handsome, no doubt about it. but was he always this oddly attractive? his eyebrows were dark and moody, his eyes (theyâre green! you never noticed) glimmered under the sunshine spilling from the windows. he looked to the side, shuffling awkwardly, his hands in his pockets. leona is a confident man. you never saw him so tensed up before.
âyou said⊠if I pass this term youâll do you anything you want from me, right?â
oh, right. you kinda wished he forgot about that. guess not. better prepare yourself to be his servant, or something. (for some reason, you didnât seem to mind)
âyeah⊠I did say that. so. what do you want?â
âI want you to go out with me.â
rook hunt
is this possible to dislike someone who doesnât even know you exist?
rook hunt, the king of drama, would be seen whistling tunes from the latest musical he watched, looking over play scripts and performing random acts in the middle of the school hallway. get out! heâs so annoying.
whatâs worse is that although he seems to be carefree and going with the flow, he always seems to be topping you at everything. got a 99 on a quiz? would you look at that, rook got a 100. learning a new language? rook speaks french! auditioning for lead role? rook already got the spot!
even hearing his name makes you fume in the ears. rook hunt is overall well-liked, he probably isnât even aware of your secret competition with him.
finally⊠finally!!! you look up at the cast of your schoolâs new upcoming play. you got the lead! and⊠rook got the second leadâŠ
heâs playing romeo⊠in romeo and juliet⊠and youâre⊠juliet⊠oh!
you roll your fists. itâs fine. itâs fine. itâs fine. youâll manage. you worked hard for this. youâll manage.
first day of practice, rook prances in speaking french. romeo and juliet takes place in italy you idiot!
âbonjour, roi de la jalousie!â
you roll your eyes, showing your displeasure. âhello, rook.â
the first few playthroughs went as perfect as it could be. most of romeo and juliet is just romeo losing his mind over a 14 year old girl, so it wasnât like you and him had to be intimate. yet.
âokay. in act 2, romeo and juliet kiss at the party. preferably, Iâd prefer to re-enact a real kiss. but if you guys are uncomfortable, we couldââ
âoh, non! I could not! to make a play so touching and real, it is important that we kiss! but if our dear roi de la jalouise is uncomfortableâŠâ
not wanting to back down against rook you shake your head. âno, no! thatâs fine! we can kiss!â
you left that day mortified. you didnât even have your first kiss yet. what is wrong with you?!
the day came to rehearse the kiss. you chugged your bottle of water and marched on stage.
you said your lines carefully, avoiding eye contact with him. the rival you made up in your delusions, a little rook with devil horns and a tail, was somehow (in reality) much taller, prettier and kind of intimidating to look at now. you felt awfully shy.
as his face leaned against yours, he only looked at you gleefully once you finally made eye contact. both of your lips were close, but he didnât kiss you. huh?
once it was break time, you sat down at the edge of the stage dumbfounded. everyone else left backstage for pizza, so it was just you in an echoey theatre.
that was until rook came in and sat beside you, holding two paper plates of pizza. he handed one to you.
âyou donât have to kiss me if you donât want to.â rook said, smiling. he was unusually calm.
ân-no! I want to!â you replied too hastily. you truly didnât seem to hate him at this moment. you only felt flustered.
âI know you are competitive. especially with me. even though your fierceness is truly beautiful, I do not advise you to do something you are not comfortable with.â
oh. you look at him. âyou noticed? hahaâŠ.â suddenly, all that competitive spirit you had felt childish.
âwell of course! Itâs what drew me to you. itâs especially why I auditioned for romeo, even though i was more interested in mercutio.â
you felt yourself turning red. he auditioned for romeo for you? just for you?
âwell⊠i already told the director Iâm okay with the kiss⊠itâs a little too embarrassing to take it back now.â
âwell⊠perhaps if we practiced together, youâd feel more comfortable, mon amour?â
you laugh. âyou keep calling me french names. what does this one mean?
rook gently kissed the space between your eyebrows. âmy love.â
(ps: roi de la jalouise means king of jealousy!)
vil schoenheit
vil schoenheit is a celebrity. a big, all-time, internet sensation kind of celebrity.
a model, an actor, an influencer⊠heâs everything!
heâs gorgeous, lovely, not like those other celebrities who are horrible in real like and kind only on the internet.
you feel blessed to know that someone as famous as him is going to the same school as you.
vil is popular, undeniably so. everywhere you go, you see him greeting people of all kinds, receiving gifts and panicking after making a girl faint from his magnificence alone.
oddly though, heâs often by himself. like he has no friends. you tilt your head in confusion. someone like him must have hundreds of friends, right? maybe he considers the entire student body as his friends! does that mean youâre his friend too?
you pinched your cheeks. thereâs no way someone like him would notice you! no matter how generous he is, you understood itâs difficult to get alone with everyone.
on one fateful morning, you ran into your classroom to grab your forgotten gym clothes when you pause right before opening the door, hearing frustrated mumbling.
âthese stupid fans and their stupid demandsâ
you peered in through the door window and saw vil schoenheit retouching his makeup, frowning.
there was an awful churn in your stomach. for some reason, you felt like you shouldnât enter the classroom. but between making it to phys ed in time and have a good first impression on a big-time celebrity, you chose to enter the classroom. itâs not a big deal anyway, itâs not like you and him even talk all that much.
you opened the door to see vil turn his head, almost like an owl as you quickly crab walked to your desk and grabbed your clothes before running off.
like expected, you didnât see vil at all after that event. although he didnât seem as lovely as you expected, it didnât really turn your view of him upside down either. youâre werenât a big fan of him anyway, so it wasnât a big deal at all.
until one day, he cornered you.
âdid you tell anyone?â
âtell what?â
âwhat you saw.â
you couldnât help but laugh. âit was one slip up. itâs not a big deal.â
vil glared at you. obviously, you didnât understand the severity of the situation. if he, vil, a high-end celebrity, screwed even the slightest, it would massively deter his career.
âokay, fine. but I donât want you to tell anyone about this going forward. if you want an autograph or something, Iâll do it butââ
you shook your hands. âItâs fine. you donât have to.â
vil raised his eyebrow. you donât want anything from him? youâre not blackmailing him? everyone always wants something out of him. but he shouldnât push things further.
he sighed. âalright. but give me your contact information. Iâd rather keep track of you instead of worrying.â
your eyes glistened at the bright new vil schoenheit in your contacts.
it was just like that. you had an untouched number on your phone. having someone so famous like him giving his number seemed enough. since there was no other reason for you guys to talk, you guys barely interacted after that (although youâve felt like a pair of eyes was watching you more often than not)
you didn't expect to run into vil again, so it was a surprise to see vil working in an empty classroom afterschool.
"stupid sports festival..." vil mumbled to himself before his eyes locked with yours.
his eyes were an enchanting colour. something tugged at your heart when you saw a close glimpse of his eyes. lavender. sharp, pristine eyes, long lashes... vil had a sort of maturity to him.
feeling yourself turning red, you blinked a few times before greeting him.
apparently, the ever-so-kindhearted vil has volunteered to work on the upcoming sports festival's banner. no one else wanted to spend their free time doing it, and vil freely told you that he felt pressured about his image because he wasn't saying anything. reluctantly he offered and now here he was.
your tilted your head. vil was just simply expressing what he truly felt about something to you. what happened to the hesitant, suspicious vil that you met all those months ago? does he trust you or something? but you guys barely even talk properly!
unfortunately for vil, you had offered to work on the banner weeks ago. however, only a few of the sports festival committee knew. the rest did not, including vil. (you weren't even aware vil was apart of it)
"well an extra hand couldn't be bad!" you say happily, clasping your hands. "would you consider your a creative person?"
a few weeks went by, planning, discussing ideas and purchasing materials. (you mostly go alone because you had to learn the hard way that vil gets recognized quite easily, even with a tight disguise)
soon, you and vil slowly started going home together. vil lives close by, saying it's better than riding some fancy car and attracting even more attention. your school's neighbourhood was quite rich so when you first passed his house, your jaw dropped. wow! it's so big!
eventually, the banner making, the sports festival planning and discussing came to an end. your impression of vil made you assume that both you and him would be going on your own paths.
"where are you going?" vil said, as you were already walking out the door.
"...home?"
"I thought we went together?"
maybe you were wrong!
everyone used to whisper about vil schoenheit. the kindhearted, friendly student at school. the mega-huge celebrity, the popular boy who always kept a distance with others.
now, everyone whispers about vil schoenheit, the kindhearted, friendly student at school. the mega-huge celebrity, the popular boy and his best friend, you. attached at the hip. are they dating?
you're surprised at vil's ability to keep you hidden from paparazzi. he was worried that rumours would rise, especially since he started inviting you over to his place. everytime pictures of him would surface the internet, you were never mentioned... luckily.
you sat down in front of him, eyes closed. vil has been getting loads of skincare PR as of late, and he's been trying the products on you, worried it would break him out. he had a shoot coming up soon.
"I haven't read my script yet and I have to leave the city in a week. could you believe the amount of procrastination I've been doing?" vil scoffs at himself.
"you didn't tell me you're leaving."
"don't worry. it's for only two weeks. I'd be back in a blink of an eye."
you huffed. "I'm gonna miss you, vil."
vil's ears flushed. but your eyes were shut closed.
"I'm gonna miss you too, I guess."
vil was wrong. after he left, time seemed to have gone slower. you were so used to spending so much of your time with him, you felt like you forgot how to hang out with other people.
you bought sweet treats with your friends, went to photobooths and stressed out about assignments and tests, but vil was at the back of your mind at all time.
"I'm coming to the airport tomorrow." vil said over the phone.
"I'll come and see you!"
"don't. too many people are gonna be there."
vil smiled at the other end of the call. he knew you'd do it anyway.
...and he was right! there you were, waiting in a crowd of a bunch of people. you were worried that he wouldn't see you.
it was fine. you knew how worked up he got about his personal and work life mixing. maybe it wasn't a good idea to see your best friend in a field of paparazzi.
well, it was too late. cameras started flashing and people started screaming a familiar name.
you tried to squeeze to the front of the crowd as best as you could, but to a point you had to stop and depend on your toes and only hope he could see you.
as a blonde boy with a mask on entered the scene, you saw him turn his head around, looking for something, until his eyes met yours.
you've always thought those eyes had a mature, elegant feel. but for some reason, this time, his eyes felt full and boyish, emotional.
you popped out from the back to see that vil has already found you, giving you a tight hug.
"vil! vil! there's paparazzi here!'
your face was squished against his chest, but you could still see and feel the pictures flashing.
"aren't you worried about, you know, those rumours surfacing?"
vil shook his head, smiling. "no, not really. not when I want them to be true."
idia shroud
you: HIII can u plz carry me in val im dying uwu
gloomurai: alright what the flip.
you: be my pocket sage kitten
gloomurai: ok fine wait for me
you stare at the chatroom between you and your online friend, gloomurai. you've been talking to the guy for a while now, and he seems to be overpowered in every game, carrying you in all your favourites nonstop. does this guy even have a life? you laugh, as you stretch your back.
it was winter break, and your house's heater was broken. while it was getting fixed, you've been spending your days in your favourite gaming cafe, in the warm heat of the pc and the warm computer screen.
you: bro im in this gaming cafe and this guy beside me wont stop mumbling i think im going insane
gloomurai: lmao im in a gaming cafe too
you: what??? rlly?? omg which one r u at
gloomurai: ignihyde cafe lols
you: WTF ME TOO???
gloomurai: HUH
you: WHICH SECTION R U IN
gloomurai: im in section 3A
you: OH MY GOD
gloomurai: what??
you: IM IN 4A
you slowly turn you head to the guy who was mumbling beside you the entire time, him doing the same. you peeked your eyes to his computer screen to have your chatroom open.
is that... your classmate... idia shroud????
you've heard about the guy. he's shy, gloomy (no pun intended) and quite repulsive to approach. of course, you've heard a number of girls talking about how hot and tall he is, how much they loveeeee loser boys.
but his attractiveness was not what caught your attention. your online friend for over a year was your CLASSMATE??? a guy you barely even talked to??? hello?? is anybody hearing this???
you suddenly felt silly for calling him your pocket sage.
that night, your phone was open to his chatroom. idia immediately stood up and left the moment you guys met eyes, so you didn't get a chance to talk to him properly.
he clearly had the green online status on his profile, but he wasn't messaging you at all like he usually was. I mean, he's someone you apparently know in real life, so there's no harm in striking up a conversation, right?
you: soooooo
you: who knew that we knew each other irl? lol
you: i mean we dont rlly talk in school so um this is kinda awkward lmfao
you: we can stop being friends online if u want
you: but i won't have anyone to carry me in league :(
you sat the tiny seen beside your message. for the next five minutes, you say idia typing and then not typing. like he was going back and forth. you just waited patiently.
gloomurai: no i still wanna be friends w u
you: u sure? i mean u kinda js dipped lolsies
gloomurai: yeah i know n im sorry i kinda panicked omfg
gloomurai: i never thought you'd be into videos and stuff thats kinda cool
you: huh?? you didn't think that?? have you not seen my anime keychains and video game characters on my phone wallpaper??
gloomurai: no i did but i thought u didnt know what they were....
you laughed, and spent the rest of the night texting him.
your heater was fixed at that point, and had no reason to go back to the gaming cafe (your mom reprimanded you for spending your entire break playing video games) so you didn't see idia until the start of the new semester.
he was still always that shy kid you knew at school, so you approached him first.
"hey idia!"
he looked up from the video game on his phone, eyes widening at the sight of you.
"u-uhm... hi."
"so! how was your winter break?"
you sat beside him, making yourself comfortable. idia tensed up but he seemed okay with it.
"I mostly played video games... like usual."
"haha, I've always thought how weird it was that you were overpowered in so many games! I mean, I've been playing just league for a solid while now and you're just so much stronger than me! in other games too! how do you put so much time into videos games?"
you've seen idia's name often at the top of exam grades when they were posted, you thought all he did was study. now your impression of him changed.
as time went on, idia seemed to have calmed down around you. he wasn't as shy anymore and started talking to you normally like how he'd be online.
when you and him were just internet friends, he refused to voice call. now, he would call and play games with you after school.
he started tailing you everywhere at school, so you even introduced him to your friends and told the funny story of how you and him first met on a game. idia seemed to get along with them as well (you've managed to garner a small group of game nerds, idia fit in smoothly)
idia was indeed tall, despite his posture (imagine how tall he would be if his back was straight) and had bright blue hair, like fire. he often reminded you of a dating game love interest, the loser, gamer boyfriends in video games. when you told him, his cheeks flushed so red that you swore even the colour of his hair changed too.
he was also handsome too, you concluded. you already knew this, but having a closer look at your face really did make you confirm it. the family genetics seemed to be going strong because when you came over to his place one time, you met his younger brother ortho, and was just as cute and pretty and handsome! (you kinda wanted to adopt him what the freak!)
for his birthday, you gifted him a pair of cute kitty hair pins. you knew he liked cats, and you also thought his hair covered his pretty face too much. you thought maybe it was too cutesy for someone like him, but surprisingly, he wore it no problem! whenever you two sunk into the couch to play games, idia would pin his bangs back to focus. hair strands fell to the front of his forehead and you often wanted to push them back and kiss it... WHAT! what are you thinking!!! he doesn't like you that way, wake up and stop being delusional!!!
your feelings for him seemed to be so one sided. he's talk comfortably and casually with you, like a best friend. someone he totally wouldn't have a crush on. you've been trying to get over it (they're only brief feelings, you swear!) but everytime your skin even slightly grazes over his you started to sweat.
maybe you should just confess.
one hot summer night, you're seated beside idia on the floor, shooting down a bunch of zombies. this has been both of your guy's 17th try.
finally... yay!!! you guys managed to complete the round and you cheer in celebration.
"oh my god!! finally!!! idia you are so awesome!"
"I know." he smirks. "what would you do without me?"
you have no idea. you think.
maybe it was the heatwaves. maybe it was the whirring fan only hitting one spot on your back, not cooling you at all. maybe it was because of chewed up popsicle stick sitting in your mouth. but you felt brave.
"I like you." you say.
Idia's smile falls. he turns to look at you.
"I mean- uhm- I- uhm-" oh god. you wanted to hide in a hole right now.
the game's loading screen was playing funky music. you were sweating, from the heat or the confession? who knows.
"what would I do without you? nothing, idia. nothing. I think about you all the time. even slightly grazing shoulders make me panic. I really, truly do like you."
before he can even reply, you continue.
"and.. you treat me like a brother! your best friend! yes, we are friends, but can you treat a person like me with some interest?? I've liked you for months, idia. how did you not get a single hint?!"
you breathe in. and breathe out.
"so. I want you to make a decision. right here, right now. do you like me back? or have I been pining over nothing?"
you stare at him. his eyes are wide, confused, like a cat. you found it so, so cute. you wanted to kiss those eyes, his cheeks so red and flushed from the summer heat, you wanted to kiss his forhead, his jaw, his lips.
your faces were close. you often forget how close in proximity idia likes to be around you.
idia seemed to struggle to make eye contact with you. he looked to the side, then the other side, and then looked down.
"I'm not the only stupid one here, you know."
huh? you blink.
"I also...thought...this was...one sided..." idia's voice egst smaller and smaller. you have to frown to hear him.
"did you not realize why I stay so close behind you? because...uhm..." idia hesitates. "because... I like... you... too. but you were so free... and awesome and cool like that or whatever... and I thought there would be no way you'd look in my.... direction like that."
your heart thumps. the game's music seemed to blur out. the fan was whirring quietly, the grasshoppers buzz outside the open window.
you heard idia's breathing, you saw his eyes spilling the colour of amber. you licked your lips.
the light of the game screen was blocked from your sight as you closed your eyes and felt idia's warmth near your face.
lilia vanrouge
cooking was something that was special in your heart. it was safe to say that you were utterly disappointed that no one was interested in your cooking club.
the only members were you and your senior, lilia vanrouge.
soon, however, you came to realize why no one wanted to join your club. lilia's cooking was a hideous!
apparently, he was infamous for bringing in the nastiest stench of a lunch to school. for some reason, you were the only person who didn't know! after finding out that lilia joined the cooking club, no one else wanted to join.
you sighed. you needed at least 4 members to be officially registered as a school club.
with lilia's help, both you and him went around promoting and encouraging your club, as well as spending your days cooking.
most of the time, it was just you trying to prevent lilia from doing something ridiculous. there should have been no reason for you to try to convince lilia to not put three pounds of sugar in stew.
salty food tastes sweet, sweet food tastes salty, food in general started to taste gross...
you were exhausted. but for some reason, having the time of your life!
lilia vanrouge was a year older than you, so there was no reason for you to really talk to him. but every time you saw him in the hallways, you always thought he looked so cool with his dark hair striped with vibrant pink and his cute and mischievous vibe! you were glad to be able to finally get to know him, even though he is graduating this year.
you were close to giving up. you were almost at the month mark and no one wanted to join. lilia patted your pack gently as you sniffed.
"it's okay... the school year is ending soon anyway. you can always try next year! obviously I won't be here to help you, but you could still give it a shot."
you smiled at him. of course it was gonna work next year, by that time, lilia would've long gone off and people would actually be interested. it be your senior year next year last well, so you knew you'll have to give it another shot.
so when the end of the month approach, you heartily accepted your denied club application. it was fine! you'll try next year!
it wasn't like home ec. didn't exist. there, you'd cook and have fun.
you kind of missed lilia and hanging out with him, so you started approaching him with new dishes you've made.
"oh! how lovely! it seems that your skills have approved ever since I helped you with cooking! my, my, I must be a chef master of sorts..."
you were nailed in the heart because of the ego hit, but you laughed nonetheless. you thought lilia was silly, fun and interesting. hanging out with him was never boring, and if there was an excuse to hang out with him again, you totally took it.
once you started bringing your dishes, lilia started bringing his own to you. it's like he wanted you dead. they tasted awful. but one bite after another, you smiled meekly as you forced yourself to eat. "it's delicious!" you'd say enthusiastically, as if you didn't just risk burning your stomach out.
lilia would smile, pleased. "wonderful, wonderful!" he'd always say, clasping his hands together.
you would always make extra food when you cooked. lilia was always in your mind when in the kitchen.
so when the last day of school slowly approached, you baked a bunch of cookies to give out to some of your senior friends, lilia included (don't tell anyone-- but lilia's bag had the most and best batch of cookies)
you sheepishly gave it to lilia on the last day. your dear lilia-senpai was graduating, someone who brought a little excitement to your life.
"thank you so much for taking care of me this year. I hope you have a good life outside of highschool!"
when lilia saw your gift, he started to laugh. "what a coincidence! I made some for you too."
he took out a bag of chocolates, storebought.
"I know you don't like my food all that much, so I decided I'd buy food instead. thanks for dealing with my cooking all year, haha."
you took a bite out of your chocolate. it melted in your mouth and the sweetness exploded. you hoped your cookies would taste just as good.
suddenly, lilia stretched out his hand and gently placed his thumb on the corner of your lips.
"you got something there" he said, as he wiped a chocolate mark. without breaking eye contact, he licked it off his own thumb.
"have a great summer."
malleus draconia
unrequited love is so embarrassing. especially if that other person doesn't even know you.
you've been head over heels for malleus draconis for 3 months. all you think about is him. all you want to see is him. but he doesn't even know you.
it was one fateful day, when he picked up your dropped pencil case for you, when you saw his soft smile and emerald eyes. his porcelain skin and his long, elegant nails. you decided from that day on, you were madly in love with him.
so, you've done what any normal person would do and deep dived everything you could find about him
malleus draconia, 3rd year, son of a successful entrepreneur, under draconia co. he likes reading, gargoyles and ice cream, he's good at instruments like the cello and violin... he's been seen exploring ruins... you're not a creep! you swear!
you have this vision in your head where malleus is a prince charming who saves you from the evil villain who wants to sell you for money.
one day, when you were going to school on a crisp morning, someone sat beside you, waiting for the bus.
the guy was unusually tall, so you turned to see malleus draconia standing before you.
"oh hello! I remember you, are you heading to school as well?"
panicked, flustered and nervous, you frantically nodded.
"I've decided I wanted to take the bus today, but I'm sure how I want to approach it. could you help me? ^_^"
"uhm.. o-okay!"
nearly shaking, you sat beside malleus on the way to school.
why was he even taking the bus anyway? wasn't he like, filthy rich?
you friends congratulated you on finally talking to the guy you like when you arrived. you laughed and said that's probably the only time you'll ever talk to him.
however, the next day, malleus was beside you once again.
"good morning!"
you only mustered to say a hello.
"I really enjoyed the bus ride yesterday. Do you also take the bus. to go home?"
you nodded.
"well, I was wondering if you and I could go home on the bus after school? I have some to understand you have to go to a different station to go back? I tried to find it yesterday, but it was just too difficult."
you nodded, again. you could not seem to talk, nervous.
that day, your friends pushed up towards him and left you alone, saying you finally have a shot of getting to know him.
this became a pattern.
every morning you'd take the bus with him to school. once it ended, you and malleus took the bus home together. you weren't sure exactly where he lived, but it was enough to know that he probably lived close by. probably the wealthy neighbourhood you've passed by multiple times.
in your mind, malleus. is perfect, elegant and charming.
in reality, malleus is a sheltered, clumsy and curious boy who really liked taking the bus to and from school.
you started to relax near him too. obviously, you're still nervous and shy, but knowing that malleus isn't a higher being like you made up in your mind, and just a rich kid who has hobbies and interests like any other, you felt a little calmer each day.
"have you done anything other than take the bus?" you asked.
"no, except going on business class on flights."
you laughed. "I was thinking..." you breathed in. "sotheresthisbakerythatopenedandIwaswonderingifyouwantedtogo" you spit out in one breathe.
malleus, like the impressive guy he is, caught everything you said. "well of course! I've been to many in europe, but I've never tasted any pastries here. I usually get them shipped. I'm quite curious!"
entering the bakery, malleus' eyes glimmered like a child.
he said that his family usually chose what he ate, so he really never got a choice. you saw him struggle to pick what he wanted and you offered some suggestions and even paid for it (malleus accidentally gave two hundred dollars for a two dollar bread, he has no concept of money)
seeing malleus act like this, your feelings for him shattered. no, not entirely. just the feelings you had for the cool, distinguished malleus you had in your head. the side of malleus he only showed to the public. instead, you fell in love with the boyish, cute and confused malleus you were seeing now. the side of malleus that he deemed you were worthy enough to see.
this year, it hadn't rained much. so you knew that if it rains, it's gonna pour, hard.
so, after school, you and malleus stood, umbrella-less in a rainstorm. buses were cancelled due to trees fallings.
"well, I could call my driver. if you tell me your address, I can definitely drop you..." malleus stopping talking as he saw you run into the rain. you didn't hear him.
"come on! I know a shortcut! if we run fast enough, we can make it back."
malleus has never met someone so free like you before.
running towards you, you grabbed his hand and pulled him forward through an unknown side of the road.
although the rainstorm was cold and wet, it felt cozy and warm now that his hand was holding onto you. malleus truly thought you were a breath of fresh air.
you started to laugh at yourself. how ridiculous. malleus, a higher class, local rich kid, was following you, someone from a lower class than him, someone not worthy of him. halfway there you realize he could've just call his driver to pick him up. you felt so silly.
"I'm sorry to drag you into the mess" you yelled amongst the splashes of the rain hitting the ground.
when malleus saw you smile and laughing as you apologized for something so silly, he suddenly could imagine an entire future with you and him together.
a.n; hai guys my phone lagged so hard becuz of this what the freak. this is also a rewrite from a very old twst fic i wrote in like 2022. if some people recognize the plots no u dont what whatttt lol!! also im sorry lilia and malleus' stories are pretty sort <//3 i started getting tired because this is so long what the flip u guys... also I might do first and 2nd years too maybe someday idk... my hands are exhausted ok bye
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Omg the toji threesome fic is just...wtf there's no other worlds to describe it it's wtf in a good way omg what if she gets pregnant? What if it's not naoya's?! WHAT WILL TOJI FJCKING SAY?! GET RID OF IT?! GIVE BIRTH AND GIVE IT TO ME?! WHAT WILL NAOYA DO?! OMGGGGG PLEASE MAKE A FIC ABOUT THE AFTERMATH AHHHH!!!!! if you want baby no pressure <3
Hello! :>
I don't know if you saw my sneak peak, but I ended up writing a sequel to this heheh I'm so glad you liked it!!
Ngl, I wasn't planning on writing more of it, but then I saw this ask and... you know, I just had to do it to 'em.
Anyways I won't say anything more; except for the warnings: mentions of infidelity. mentions of smut (the word cunt is used) angst I believe. it's sad at the end, or I try to make it sad lol. Mentions of pregnancy. Also, I am no expert relating to pregnancy matters so take it with a grain of salt and lots of plot convenience đ
.
Happy reading!!
sequel to this.
Tojiâs not to disclose if you or Naoya came back for a repeat of that nightâs succession, though he will admit your pregnancy was not surprising.
Itâs not like he could run away from it either, for as soon as news graced the eldersâ ears, itâs all the estate spoke of.
From enthusiasm to welcome the next generation of Zenâin sorcerers, to the ever-growing hope of recovering their prized cursed technique, which has been absent for hundreds of yearsâŠ
Expectations for this child were at an all-time high.
But to you and Naoya, all you could care about was the blessing this baby represented.
A family.
The pinnacle of all their yearnings, the fruits of their never-ending efforts finally appearing as the positive pregnancy test you took one morning after feeling particularly nauseousâŠ
Or Tojiâs, perhaps.
Toji initially didnât think much of the âshockingâ announcement. Not even after his behavior that nightâthey were just heat of the moment things, nothing that he meant nor really cared about, simply said to get a rise out of Naoya; and oh, was his reaction satisfying.
In other words, he really, genuinely, couldnât care less about what the wimpy heir and his ditzy wife were to face from that point forward.
But when their behavior towards him, the engaging conversations, invitations to drink tea, amongst other activities, drastically ceased, to the point of them turning on their heel and going the opposite way when bumping into himâŠ
It didnât take long for the pieces to fall into place, and when the puzzle was complete, Toji could only laugh.
Itâs like an open secret, albeit solely for those involved.
The baby inside you wasnât Naoyaâs.
It was Tojiâs.
And this filled him with morbid fascination no other high had been able to provide.
To know that the baby everyone was praising as the future of the Zenâin, a promising sorcerer, as expected of the heir, was the ultimate irony, the exact anti-thesis of all they once declared of Toji.
He was very tempted to let everyone know.
Proudly announce the truth to the world, screaming to the top of his lungs that that baby isnât Naoyaâs, itâs mine.
The scandal this revelation would bring was nothing short of earth-shattering, and more likely than not, the elders wouldnât even know where to start from. Although your infidelity could be a good reference.
Followed by the fact that no matter how much they try to get rid of him, heâll always find a way to haunt themâlike a ghost shackled to the estate walls, Toji would always remain in the back of their minds, unsettling them whenever they did as much as breathe.
Although for this to work, heâd have to wait until the child was born, officiated as son of Naoya, before he could do any true damage.
To see the kind of face the Zenâin would make upon finding out the truth⊠is one that makes his prolonged stay all but worthwhile.
As well as knowing your reaction towards the whole ordealâif youâve even been able to sleep knowing well that your life was on the line by carrying such a frightening secret in your womb.
Considering the way you frequently sought him out during those lonely nights where your husband would be away for long periods of time, this probably didnât perturb you as much. After all, what did you expect after receiving his seed as constantly as you did? That nothing would happen? No consequences to be suffered?
You were many things, but he never thought you as delusional.
Or perhaps, you were hoping for this. To have his child. Heâd come to believe so after the tight way your cunt squeezed him.
Well, that would only make him the delusional one.
Either way, he suspects that while your secret mightâve prickled the back of your mind from time to time, it didnât bother you as much as he hopedânot with the way your staff coddled your every move, how the clan would gift you expensive items to celebrate the future head of the clan, per tradition, or how happy you appeared to be with your growing bump, gently caressing it and beaming while confessing oh how much you longed to finally hold your baby.
It irked him.
To see that even through this deceit, you were still blissful.
It was undeserving. Wrong.
At least to the man who has been sentenced to nothing but pain and disgrace since the moment he was born, thatâs how it was.
Because it was impossible for him to grasp the innocence of othersâTo accept that some were just simply⊠with better luck. Free to live as they desired, and without having to pay for the prejudice of others.
Toji, now more than ever, felt that he was being used. Plucked from his misery, toyed with, and discarded once dried out of his benefits.
Thus, his motivation to ruin your and Naoyaâs happiness became as palpable as everâhastily making his way towards you once catching you by one of the many gardens, intending to remind you of the power he had, how easily it would be for him to plant the seed of doubt amongst the staff, let it flourish up to the elders, and ruin your and Naoyaâs life forever.
Unless your anguished face was to stop him.
It was abrupt, happening in less than a second, yet enough for him to understand it wasnât because you were upset by some redundant folly, but rather, of pain.
With one of your hands rushing up to your stomach while the other to your back, it was as if the weight of your baby had suddenly become too much to handle; youâd then anxiously looked for a chance to sit down, frowning when realizing the only option was the strenuous engawa in front of youâŠ
Before freezing, face quickly void of any color, when seeing Toji abruptly standing by your side, with mysterious intentions you were not interested in finding out.
âToji, youâ You breathe as you do your best to walk away from him, just for him to keep up with you. âYou shouldnât be here.â
âGee, thatâs the thanks I get for getting you pregnant?â he sneers. âNever thought you to be as prejudiced as the restââ
âWhatâwhat is wrong with you?!â you condemned, snatching your arm from his grasp. âHow dare you?! Donât you ever say something like ever agaâah!â
âY/N.â Tojiâs eyes widen when he sees you lean forward, wrapping your arms around your stomach as you hiss and cuss, while tightly closing your eyes in what he recognizes strenuous pain. âWhat is happening?! Are youââ
No.
Could it be? And so soon?!
âAre you having the baby??â
âWhat? NâNoâ!â you whimper, squeezing tears out of the corners of your eyes. âItâs justâitâs just this pain that comes and goes sometimesâIâI need to sit downââ
Toji doesnât hesitate to help you onto the engawa by firmly, yet gently, holding your arms and lowering you down to the wooden floor. You didnât plan on accepting his help at first, but when a sharp pain reminds you that you couldnât really pick and choose in this situation, you end up agreeing.
Once seated, Toji concludes this was much better off in the hands of a staff member, or even a doctor if he could somehow manage to do that, so he quickly stands up and turns towards the hallwaysâbut the moment you see him take as little as a step away from you, your hands fly to grab his sleeve, stopping him on his tracks before looking up to him with the most pitiable look on your face.
âStay.â You breathe, swallowing. âPlease.â
And whether because of your pleading, teary eyes, or because it had been so long since heâd basked in your warm company, Toji obliges, soon taking the spot besides you as your hand now securely gripped his, with such an unprecedented force that has him both amused and concerned by your pain, while offering whatever little comfort he could with his touch.
Itâs in these quiet yet tense moments that he finally gets to see the certainty of your situation.
While you expected to happily enjoy your future life as a mother, relish on the compliments of those around you, the praises of your in-laws, and the company and support of your husbandâŠ
Reality had been nothing short of deviant from your dreamsâstarting from the high risk your pregnancy was labeled asâŠ
To the haunting consequences of your past actions.
âAre you sure this is normal?â Toji asks, seeing that your pain was not subsiding. âI think you need helpââ
âNo shit, Toji!â you gasp, he raises an eyebrow. âI meanâIâm sorry.â
âNo need to apologize, princess. Itâs nothing Iâm not used to already.â
â⊠is thatâis that supposed to make me feel better?â
âNo. Not really.â He snickers, a smile thatâs quickly wiped off his mouth when hearing you hiss. âBut Iâve seen it work with others, so why not give it a shot?â
âIâm notâIâm not going to do that.â You huffed. âIâI wouldnât do that to you.â
âBut youâd ignore me?â
âIf youâre here to scold me, this is not the right time.â You hiss again, feeling a sharp pain attack your lower back, making you press your lips and whine.
âAre you sure you donât want me to do something? Bring you something to drinkâor⊠something?â
âYes, butâbut itâs not like you can help me anyways.â You confess, he frowns.
âWhat? Why? How hard is it to get something for you to take?â he scoffs.
âThey donât want me toâthey sayâthey say it might hurt the baby.â
Toji blinks.
âAnd so, what? Theyâre just going to leave you to suffer?â
You donât respond.
He sighs. Toji shouldâve known better.
âWhere does it hurt?â
âMyâmy back and stomachâ you breathe, another sharp bolt of pain on those places precisely, making you hold his hand even tighter, once again, heâs surprised someone like you could even dent his skin. âAnd no matter what I doânothing helps! Not even that stupid warm bath, or the massages Junko-san told me to doââ
The desperation for failed solutions after failed solutions is clear in your voice, a consistency that effectively shows your growing frustration at being reminded again and again that not even when carrying the future of the Zenâin, are you respected as a person.
Itâs always the needs of others first, the beliefs of the restâonly this time around it was your baby, although through the twisted words of your in-laws.
âIâm so, so tired of feeling exhausted, I just want toââ
âLet me try.â Toji interrupts, offering a solution that initially catches you by surprise, a part of your mind urging you to decline and get away as far as possible, the dangers his closeness could give are far bigger than youâre willing to put up withâ
Yet, another part of you is telling you to allow him, if only for a moment, to help you.
To enjoy his company, something youâve been unjustifiably deprived of.
Something you shouldâve had now more than ever due to your pregnancy, but for many painful reasons, you didnât.
But just because you wanted it, does it mean you should?
âŠ
âŠ
âŠ
It wouldnât be the first time you succumbed to these desires.
Thus, the decision is made when freeing his hand and gesturing to him to proceed with a nod. Toji then places his hands over your shoulders, firmly pressing his fingertips against them before beginning to ease the tensions and stresses away from your body through circular motions.
Had you known of Tojiâs talent, you wouldâve asked for massages more than anything else from himâfor the way he carefully worked over your knots, starting from your neck and shoulders, down to your spine and to your lower back⊠it was simply amazing.
And for a moment, itâs like youâve forgotten the strained relationship you had with him in favor of wondering where he even learned to do something like that.
âOh my godââ you sigh, shoulders relaxing as Toji continues to massage you. âThis is so much betterâŠâ
âWell, know you can always count on me to make you feel better, right?â He teases, your satisfaction dwindles for a moment with a frown. âItâs just a joke.â
âItâs not the time for jokes.â You respond. âbut at least my back doesnât hurt anymoreâŠ.â
âThatâs the reason why youâre so tenseâ itâs because you canât take a joke.â Toji adds, as if he were finding out how much he could push it before you snapped. So much for his concern⊠or perhaps it was his way to lighten up your mood?
âYeah, how horrible of meâitâs not like Iâm carrying a baby.â You chided, and once again, his arrogance is smacked out of him.
After a moment of silence and brief repentance, Toji speaks.
âHow did Naoya take it?â
ââŠI donât want to talk about that.â
It went bad. If not horrible.
Naoya was excited at first, over the moon to know that he was finally to be a father after all their attempts.
But when doubts began to plague his mind, eventually leading to the DNA test⊠his absence was the clear indication of his feelings.
However, Â if his reaction hurt you and your marriage so badly, then why did you keep theâ
âI always wanted a family.â You say, succumbing to one of the many questions you rightfully assumed Toji to have. âFrom the moment I married, no, even before that, I knew thatâs what I wanted in life. To have a little girl, or boy, that I could endlessly dote and spoil on⊠And once I got with Naoya, realizing he too shared my dream, I literally felt it was only a matter of weeks before weâd have our own family.
But, when we began to try, and try, and try⊠what I once felt just by my fingertips was slowly transforming into an impossible dream.
People say that these things happen unexpectedly, just when you need them the most.
⊠and I wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt. Remain hopeful and believe that the gods had other plans for me in the meantime. But⊠the two of us knew it. There was something wrong, and we didnât know whatâ
Or more like we didnât want to know.
Naoya couldnât even consider himself as the possible cause. And I⊠I also didnât want to believe I was the obstacle between me and my dreams.
And then, you came along.
I guess itâs the weight of our actions that eventually made Naoya⊠hesitant for the baby.
We always knew that it was yours, itâs just that maybe⊠maybe we hoped it wasnât. We so desperately wanted to believe the baby was his, ours, and not fruit of something we perhaps shouldâve never done.â
Feeling both confused and slightly angered, Toji scowls.
âI can understand one thingâI was used. Fine, whatever. Nothing new. But the rest? If it was such a big issue your marriage, then why did you keep the baby? Surely Naoya considered getting an abortiââ
âBecause I wanted to keep the baby.â You confess. âI was growing so desperate and lonelyâto be married and yet be as isolated as Iâve never felt before, what was I supposed to do?! In a house full of people⊠do you even know how that feels?!â
âLike you wouldnât imagine.â
Your eyes widen, and soon, a crushing wave of regret inundates your mind.
âIâm sorry.â You murmur, Toji sighs. âI didnât mean to.â
âYouâre just stressed.â He concludes. âPregnancy stuff, I guess.â
ââŠI want my husband, here, with me.â You quietly admit. âI donât want him to work anymore, spend days and weeks far away. But instead, heâs out there, angry with me and the babyâŠâ
âHeâll come around.â Toji doesnât know why he said that, only that he had to. You frown.
âHow do you even know that? How do you know he wonât divorce meâor worse, cheat on me?â
âDo you hear yourself?â he scoffs, partially holding back his laughter. âDo you actually believe heâd be capable of cheating on you?â
A woman as special as you?
âEveryone else did at one point.â You remind him, he rolls his eyes. âWell, what else am I supposed to think after his absence?! He doesnât even love me anymore for all I care!â
âThatâs stupid.â
âMaybe for you it is.â You cry, tears begin to pool in your eyes. âItâs just a matter of time before he files for divorce and leaves me for someone else! Someone that can give him children of his own! Oh, I shouldâve never allowedâ"
âNaoya isnât going to divorce you because Iâve seen how he treats you.â Toji interrupts, hurt by your blatant disregard of him, and yet, something about seeing you so distressed like this, heartbroken, makes him want to console you even more. âHe couldâve divorced you the moment he saw the results, but he didnât. Have you thought about that?â
âPerhaps heâs waiting for the right moment to humiliate me before his familyââ
âNaoya loves you.â Toji says, and the words hurt him more than he anticipated. But⊠why? âIâve known the kid since he was bornâIâve seen how he treats the people he doesnât care about. And youâre nothing like that, not even close. So no, he wonât humiliate you.â
âAnd what makes you think that?â
Toji goes silent.
Heâs acting as if he doesnât know why heâs out here insisting so much on comforting you. And honestly? It made sense, for just a few hours ago he couldnât care less any for a woman that played with two men and now had to pay the consequencesâ
But the truth wasnât as cryptic as he liked to believe. All that he needed to do was dive a little deeper into his own thoughts and heâd soon find out why, as clear as day, he was fighting so hard to make you feel better.
And it all started the moment he accepted one crucial detail:
You were the mother of his child, his firstborn, and so⊠it unknowingly evoked a sense of protection towards you, deep underneath the layers of his disbelief and mockeryâŠ
Or more like further developed.
Since the first night the two spent together without Naoya, or perhaps even before, there was something brewing inside him, slowly, but surely. The first foundations of the feelings that would only flourish the night he had you alone, completely for himself.
In those moments of solitude, Toji liked to imagine that you were his wife; accompanying him underneath the covers, seeking his embrace, his touch, while telling him of your tedious day and how you so desperately looked forward to seeing him againâ
And not Naoya.
The possibility of coming home to a warm bed, with a wife that treated him like an actual person, not a stain in the long history of the clan, contrary to the cold, empty room he has been condemned to since birth⊠is something he didnât know he wanted, until you stumbled onto his path.
To be able to seek your figure whenever walking across the estate, hoping to catch you just around the corner, gossiping with your ladies about whatever it is that you liked to talk about with them, before you notice him by the corner of your eyes, lifting your gaze and seeing the lovely way your eyes would brighten at his presenceâ
A wide smile adorning your face, cheeks quickly turning red as you shyly dismiss your staff in favor of receiving him. Running to him to tightly embrace him, subsequently standing on your tip toes to land a kiss on his lips before murmuring the sweetest welcome home and tending to him.
And eventually⊠getting to hear your moving cries upon learning youâre expecting a baby. After many weeks of trying, both their efforts are finally met with the most beautiful reward life could give, letting your imagination run wild with all the things you wanted to do as a future motherâand yet, youâd still find a way to reassure him that heâd be a good dad.
That the disgrace of the Zenâin, the wretched man no one deemed respectable, less capable of harboring love, was still capable of being a good father. A caring husband.
âŠ
But this was nothing but a silly desire of his, a response to the horrible things heâs endured.
âŠPerhaps if things had been different, had he been born as literally anyone else but himself⊠or maybe even met you under different circumstances, his life wouldâve been completely different.
One with you, hopefully.
âToji!â you suddenly gasp, startling him and concernedly looking at you.
âWhat is it now?â he frowns.
âThe baby.â You say, which does nothing to ease his worries. âItâsââ
âItâs what? Whatâs happening??â
âThe baby is kicking.â You reveal, swiftly taking his hand and placing it over your round stomach and onto the area you feel their kicks to be. âI canâtâI canât believe it, look!â
âWhat do you mean theyâreââ
Tojiâs eyes widen.
A kick.
And another. And another one.
You werenât lying, the baby was kicking.
And unbeknownst to him, this was their first time doing it too.
âCan you feel that?â you say, and all past worries were now replaced with excitement and overwhelming happiness for this special moment. âThe baby is finally kicking!â
âI⊠can.â He demurs, trying his best to comprehend what was happening just beneath his palm, before noting the peculiarity of your sentence. âWhat do you mean finally?â
âItâs the first time he does it.â You reveal. âItâs supposed to happen around this time, but I didnât know when, of course. I guess⊠nowâs the day.â
âThat meansâŠâ
Naoya didnât get the privilege of feeling the babyâs first kicks.
No.
Not any baby.
His baby.
And now that this truth settled in his mind, it quickly became the sweetest moment he had ever experienced in his life. Something he wishes to preserve for all eternityâŠ
Just after dealing with the enormous sense of guilt and shame settling in his heart.
For how could he ever consider bestowing the same fate as his to this innocent child, just to get a rise of the family that wronged him? Towards someone whom he hasnât even met⊠simply because he couldnât deal with his own emotions?
Just when did he turn so despicable? Embracing the kind of malice as his clan?
He should be ashamed to even be beside you.
âItâs a boy.â You say, abruptly cutting through his thoughts.
âHuh?â
âThe babyâitâs a boy.â You repeat. âWeâre having a boy.â
Toji doesnât know why, nor thought it possible, but the news somehow makes him feel even happier.
âA boy.â He repeats. âA son.â
âWe havenât decided a name yetâ you confess. âI was thinking something in honor of Naoya, continue the tradition like him and his father.â
âWhy not something for you?â Toji suggests instead; his concern might be disguised in favor of your emotions (and partially, he was) but it was mainly the distaste of having Naoyaâs, or technically Noabitoâs, name anywhere near him.
But he wasnât going to tell you that, obviously.
âAfter the way heâs acting, you deserve that much.â
You press your lips together before lightly chuckling, finding some truth behind his words.
âI guess so⊠but then, which name?â you ponder, frowning as you go deep into thought, yet nothing seems to arise for the occasion, certainly not when youâve done nothing but consider names with the same kanji as your husband whenever touching the subject.
Thinking you needed more time to consider, or perhaps needing to admit there was nothing else you wanted but honor your husband, you accept defeat with a sigh.
âI donât know, Toji. Maybe I should just name him after Naoââ
âMegumi.â
âWhat?â
âMegumi. Blessing.â Toji explains. âI thought itâd be fitting with what you told me.â
âThatâs⊠very straight forward.â You say after a few seconds of quiet consideration, âUnusual, since itâs mostly used as a girlâs name, and I donât know if the elders would approveââ
âLook, if itâs that much of a problem you donât have to useââ Never one to happily accept rejection, Toji quickly feels both embarrassed and frustrated by you, which he does not hesitate to let you know.
Only to be surprised yet again.
âBut also, very sweet.â You smile, briefly looking up to him before glancing back to your stomach and onto your hand resting on top of his.
He blinks, perplexed by your sudden admittanceâand such, all he can do is stare at you while you keep pouring your heart out.
âEven with the things I had to endure to have him here⊠heâs still my blessing, and I wouldnât want him any other way.â
At your declaration, Toji is pushed down onto another turmoil of emotions.
It shouldnât be that hard to conclude this is something he should isolate himself from.
Remember that he isnât part of this marriage, no matter if he had permission of the other two involved, or how much he tries to convince himselfâUnderstand that his blood means nothing, both inside and outside the clan, and thatâs how itâll always be.
But when your hand gently squeezes his for a moment, thumbs caressing his knuckles as you let him know your pains are slowly disappearing and how grateful you are for his helpâall his worries are quickly discarded, allowing him to once again imagine live out this faux reality a bit longer. Â
A happiness that comes from the notion of being your husband, simply enjoying a quiet afternoon, the refreshing spring breeze, while sitting by the engawa, in front of your favorite garden, trying to make up for all the time he spent away from you.
Time Toji knew he shouldâve spent either way by trying to get close to you, see your growth firsthand, check on you from time to time, assist whenever possibleâ instead of plotting a stupid plan to ensure your and the babyâs downfall.
He reproached himself for having fallen for such an arrogant trap, and convinced himself this was the way to go.
Yet, he didnât allow that thought to interfere much with the present. He shouldnât either wayânot with the lovely bumps of his sonâs kicking against his hand, almost as if he recognized it was his father finally acknowledging himâŠ
And certainly not with your warmth reminding him of what couldâve been.
A moment heâll preserve in his memories for the rest of his days, because while relishing in your company, he had already made up his mind.
One that fitted with the idea that all good things must come to an end.
Especially those that are simply not meant to be, less for someone as disgraceful as him.
It hurt him to come to this conclusion. To acknowledge what his mind, and existenceconstantly reminded him about.
But he knew he had to do it.
From that point forward, heâll do everything in his power to keep away from you.
Toji would no longer watch you from afar, nor ask for your whereabouts, whether directly or indirectly.
Heâll simply limit himself to hearing of your wellbeing, or how your relationship began to flourish yet again, through rumors of the staff, if he was ever around the estate to acknowledge them.
He was right when he said Naoya would come along, you know? He might be wrong in some things, or most, but when it comes to judging otherâs character, Toji never misses.
It was nothing but obvious that Naoya loved you very much, after all, if he no longer wanted to know anything from you, you wouldnât have lasted as long as you did.
Naoya kept you at the estate, fed, warm, tended for, because he loved youâto the point of going against his own clan to provide you with the much-needed assistance you required for your oscillating pains.
With such gestures, it shouldnât come to him as a surprise that you also loved Naoya very much.
And yet, it hurt him to realize such a thing.
But who was he trying to fool?
At the end, he had always knew he had no place in that marriage. No matter how much he tried to convince himself that the reason you kept returning to him was because you wanted something more from himâit was never the truth to begin with:
Your mind was always in Naoyaâs wellbeing, and in his love.
He was ultimately a step towards your goals. Whether for pleasure, or for something deeper, it didnât matterâthey all went to the same target.
So, when he hears from the gossiping staff that youâve named your child Megumi, he doesnât get his hope ups anymore.
Instead, Toji simply takes it as what it is: a way to thank him for the blessing heâs given you, honor him one last time, before cutting ties with him forever.
Because the moment anyone catches wind of his relationship to your son⊠everything will collapse, and that is something he is no longer willing to allow.
Thus, he stays away. Keeps his distance from you and Naoya as both continue to tend for their growing family, giving Megumi things he had only dreamed of getting:
A warm, cozy bed to sleep in, where heâd be able to dream about all kinds of things heâd like to do when the following day arrives.
A roof over his head, guarding him from the cold pours of the rain, or the burning rays of the sun, as he watches the world go by.
Food to fill his stomach, every day, whenever and whatever he wanted, ensuring his healthy growth or an occasional craving.
A set future that would reassure him of any misgivings, permitting him to fail and not worry if heâll have anyone to back him up, or start from zero.
But most importantlyâ
Love.
To remind him that no matter what happens, whatever he does or doesnât do, heâll always have a family to support him just the way he is.
âŠ
âŠ
âŠ
Yeah.
Itâs clear to him now.
It had always been better this way.
In other words, Toji disappears from your and Naoya's life to ensure your safety. Woaaah. I hope I was able to convey that kind of sad redemption (?)
Also, I was debating whether to actually name the baby Megumi or not, since it's a whole other characterâbut then I thought, why not? and thus this happened.
I guess we get to the conclusion that if there's one person that's most deprived (and in need) of love, it would be Toji. We all saw how he got after mamaguro died... so I think him doing an 180 to protect the mother of his child and son is 100% accurate and sad omg. jesus, how different from the Toji I portrayed in the previous oneshot.
Anyways, I hope it was to your liking :3 Thank you for sending in this ask, I really enjoyed writing it!
Take care, and hope to see you soon â€ïžâ€ïž
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