lord-of-some - Tumblr blog

[lord-of-some]

dysphoria

2019

cone 1 terracotta, glaze

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150 meter aluminum sea serpent skeleton sculpture in Nantes, France. Artist Huang Yong Ping

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[sits up suddenly in a cold sweat] what if my corpse doesn't rot

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By Vanessa Stockard

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this is how I imagine having a werewolf boyfriend looks like

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my bitch wife took my mortality in the divorce and now I am cursed to walk the earth a shambling husk forever trapped in the gray nothingness between the beauty of life and the release of death 👎👎👎👎

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[lord-of-some]

Imagine a vampire who had chronic pain when they were alive and who thought they would lose their condition when they became immortal and while they do gain the typical super strength and vampire magic powers they still have their normal pain. It's almost worse now because normal painkillers no longer affect them and they have to shell out for the expensive magic stuff. Any time they ask for help they get advice like "drink lots of blood" "go for nightly walks through the cemetery" and "try bat yoga (yoga but you're a bat)" and it's just generally frustrating when everyone acts like they've never even heard of a vampire in pain before.

At the same time, a werewolf has chronic pain and has a different issue where pain is pretty normal for werewolves while shifting, but when they start feeling joint pain and aches in their day-to-day life even without shifting. There are a lot of resources to shift in a safe way to minimize discomfort but other wolves are baffled when they talk about being in pain without shifting.

anyways they meet and fuck nasty style.

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first thing id do as a skeleton is drink red wine from a goblet and have it spill out everywhere . second thing id do is play my ribs like a xylophone

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Guillotines often backfired, leaving the victim's head even more strongly attached than it was before the attempt.

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Your honor I think you'll find that my message "I am going to kill you with a hammer tomorrow morning as you leave for work I know your routine and I will catch you" did not have "/srs" attached to it

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I need some cozy, feel-good audio dramas. No big stakes, heartbreaks or existential crisis. Just nice calm warming vibes, please (Fantasy, sci-fi and comedy very much welcome)

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PANCAKE STACK ON THE OL’ HEAD BONE CANNOT SAVE YOU

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ACTING SMUG ABOUT THE MESMERIZING LABYRINTH IN WHICH YOU KEEP YOUR COLLECTION OF ANCIENT COMPUTING DEVICES DEDICATED TO DISPLAYING GEOMETRIC SHAPES AND NOTHING ELSE GODDAMMIT CANNOT SAVE YOU

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FLIPPING THE OL’ GLITTER BIRD AT YOUR ENEMIES CANNOT SAVE YOU