losthighwys

[losthighwys]

my internet has been out for a few days and it’s back so i’m finishing tfr commentary track 1 and getting gradually more and more pissed off at the bullshit everyone here has been doing all week

[losthighwys]

does julia even know the man who taught her to be a ghost is dead? that her "i'm okay" signals aren't reaching anyone? are there any non-imf individual who'd mourn luther?

[losthighwys]

i just wonder what happens when the world gets nastier and her life goes through its ups and downs and she ages and one day she isn’t sure anymore

[losthighwys]

“But that's the pattern, isn't it? The cross you've been left to bear. The closer someone gets to you, the harder it is to keep them alive.”

More fuel for my “grace/ethan tragic pity-sex” fire

[losthighwys]

literally what must it be like for her to spend most of her life knowing he could be gone at any moment and the world would just keep spinning. no one would even be aware he existed except for her and a handful of people who also don’t exist. she won’t know if he was in pain. she won’t know what happened to his body. she might never know for sure if he’s still here except i think she believes she could feel it

[losthighwys]

More fuel for my “grace/ethan tragic pity-sex” fire

[losthighwys]

lane shooting the girl from the record store in front of ethan because he knew, without ever meeting or speaking to him, that it would make ethan obsessed. it would make him follow. it would make him search. it would make him abandon everything and everyone around him. it would make him careless and fixated. it would make him vulnerable. “human nature. my weapon of choice.”

[losthighwys]

"You must be exhausted."

[losthighwys]

Hugs (Sevastopol anon from last night)

Love u

[losthighwys]

still thinking about the cruciform key and how Only Ethan can bear that cross and how he falls to his knees in the street under its weight and how he suffers and dies and is brought back from the dead to save humanity from its own self-destructiveness

[losthighwys]

One thing about the Sevastopol sequence and the drowning and decompression in particular is I am soooo uncomfortably aware of my body sensations at times now. I get a regular headache and I’m thinking about it. My hands are stiff from typing and I’m thinking about it. Sore after working out and thinking about it. Chilly in a well air conditioned room and thinking about it. It’s so goddamn visceral.

when i say it’s upsetting to watch i mean it makes my whole body turn in on itself like it’s absolutely unrelenting. i don’t even want to think about it enough to answer this.

[losthighwys]

you can pretend julia isn’t important but the last movie was about the entire planet almost getting annihilated because ethan fell in love with her. so.

[losthighwys]

Doing this again tomorrow and am already sick with ptsd flares, not responsible for anything i say this weekend etc

had to leave work for the day to go back to the hospital and continue trying to get my body to function post-abuse which is all to say i’m currently in a diner reading mission impossible porn full screen brightness

[losthighwys]

I think ethan thinks he’s fundamentally a bad person because even if he had known the true consequences of stealing the rabbit’s foot he absolutely would have still stolen it

[losthighwys]

It's so hard to rewatch MI3 now after seeing TFR. Ethans love for his wife killed his best friend, wounded the other, and almost destroyed the entire world.

[losthighwys]

really funny to tap this guy and go “you have to make blockbuster action movies”

[losthighwys]

this is still #1 circle of hell in my eyes but #2 circle of hell prob being an incredibly intentional film nerd forced to make blockbusters no one pays attention to enough to even vaguely grasp what’s happening on screen

In all honesty working in the arts for a couple decades and then taking over a franchise where you now have to answer to fanbases and raging stans who launch personal vendettas against everything you do sounds like hell on earth to me like actual true honest to god hell on earth