lottie-langford

[lottie-langford]

──she is a fan alright, but not the kind Alice has in mind. Lottie is a proud mother, watching her from afar; on TV, on social media. ever since she found out about her she is keeping up with news of her and her life because she is too much of a coward to tell her who she is —she is too afraid that her daughter will reject her, she won’t understand. there was a glimmer of hope as she heard her speak of her family, of being adopted. her blue eyes remained glued on the photo before her, of her and him. his wife hadn’t known, but did he not? he kept their daughter, didn’t tell her anything but lies.

a fire, she sighed at the thought, but before she could comment, anything at all, the words made her freeze. tears welled up in her eyes, and she tried to blink them away while she put the frame back in its rightful place. “I…” Lottie didn’t know what to say; her daughter had no idea who she was, she thought her family was dead and hence never looked for them, while her father was right there with her and she spent a lifetime crying and trying to find her ever since they had whisked her away in Europe.

“thank you for the eggs,” she settled on, barely meeting her daughter’s gaze. she spun on her heel and rushed out of the door, already feeling mentally overwhelmed, the tears now threatened to fall down her face and she would seem even crazier to Alice if she didn’t walk away, and would have no lie, no makeup excuse for her reaction.

⸻ When the words were repeated she frowned a little. ❛ I mean, aren't you a fan? I do wonder how those people find the address anyway. ❜ She shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. The younger blonde has no clue who was the other woman, and yet she is convinced she is another fan. Funny, she would think her fan was the younger audience. ❛ It's where I work. ❜ She admitted sheepishly. The next words, she frowned a little but the smile remained on her features. ❛ Okay… ❜ She was about to walk out to the door, but she noticed she was looking at the framed picture of her and her family.

❛ It is. ❜ Then she approached her and pointed to the pictures. ❛ That is me, and my mother, father… And my siblings. And before you ask… ❜ Everybody asked it anyway, Alice doesn't even look like her own mother. Her father, however… A few traces. ❛ I am adopted. As for my blood family, they died in a fire. I don't have any memory of it, I was a baby. ❜ Okay, that topic was too personal, but she feels as if she could count on this woman and share the bits of her life, in the past she has no memory of it.

❛ Do you know my mother? ❜ By the expression the other made she assumed she could know either her mother or father.

[lottie-langford]

──a soft smile formed on her lips at the younger woman’s response; she, too, would google things when she needed to figure something out ( well, that’s when her husband wasn’t already taking care of it ). thinking of it, she came to realize that she was rather spoiled in that sense, never had to worry about mundane things anymore when she had someone taking care of them for her. and for some reason it made her feel embarrassed, self-conscious, in that moment; like she was going to be judged if she were to admit that she couldn’t know, she had a driver, she didn’t notice these things. “I am new here,” she smiled, which was also not a lie, she had been in Woodside for a couple of weeks now. “I would say you can appeal the ticket, there is usually a ten minute grace period after it expires, but…the price is probably not worth the hustle…” she mused.

As silly as it seemed, a flutter of comfort bloomed in her chest at the woman's uncertain response. It meant that despite her lack of knowledge over the most mundane of things wasn't the issue here. "Right. I could probably google and figure something out," she exhaled, dark waves bouncing at her shoulders as she nodded. There was an answer for everything if you googled it right.

"Do you know if they're always so... punctual?" After a beat, the model spoke again, realizing the question in point wasn't something the typical person could answer. "Sorry, you probably don't know that. Unless you do," she added in between fidgeting with her rings.

[lottie-langford]

──the smile that adorned her lips was motherly, soft. he was older than her girl, it felt a little odd to think that —why did she always have to think of her when she couldn’t even work up the courage to talk to her, meet her. “historical fiction?” she inquired, in a playful tone; she didn’t want to sour her own mood once again and head home when she wanted a distraction while her husband was working. “maybe you can help with my painting then,” she joked, even though she kind of meant it, too, for she could use a suggestion or two. “I can’t say horror is amongst my tastes, and in art? not even close, but I would like to experiment…” she shrugged, lightly.

"I know, that's why i'm saying that I used to think that way about someone my age. But I am only thirty years old and my life seems to just be starting so I laugh at myself for thinking that this was old at one point in my life." He smirked and then heard her pick of genre. "Ahhh yeah, that's one thing that I tend to steer away from honestly. I don't like history whatsoever so I try to stay away from that specific genre. Horror though, that's something that I can definitely get on board with. I love horror. I don't read the super gory stuff, but I do enjoy a good horror."

[lottie-langford]

──her nerves were still frail while she was searching for distractions in her work and exploring the new place; anything to keep her mind busy from obsessing over how she should go about meeting her daughter. at times like this she preferred the company of her husband, it calmed her down, he knew just how to ground her and talk to her, but today he was busy and she found herself wondering, aimlessly for the most part, shopping for her new home, things she hoped her daughter would like. the driver had texted he was going to grab a coffee, but she still walked to the car, her mood soured and she didn’t want to be out anymore ( she gets like this often; moody, out of the blue ).

“oh,” she breathed, laughing a little. “maybe try online?” she suggested —embarrassing, she couldn’t admit she didn’t know either; her husband took care of everything for her.

— open starter 0/4 ; downtown.

Shit. Had she really been gone for two hours? When she’d looked at the clock, she could’ve sworn she had nearly half an hour to go before her zone was timed out. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” she exhaled, pulling the ticket from her windshield and looking over the timestamp. Okay, so maybe she’d miscalculated, but only by fifteen minutes. “One hundred dollars for parking in a spot for fifteen minutes over? Seriously, I can’t,” she trailed off, dark hues rolling as she gripped the ticket tighter in one hand. "How do I even pay this?" As the question ghosted off her tongue, she caught another's gaze and forced a smile to her mouth. "First time," she added as she held up the ticket for the other to see.

[lottie-langford]

──a pearl of laughter fell from her lips at the response. “you are not even old to be considered old,” she said in a matter-of-fact tone, her voice light and airy. he barely looked older than thirty, and even if he were, he’d had a baby face which was always a plus. Lottie barely felt old being nearly in her fifties so the conversation really held a sense of humor for her ( and yes, she might have had a bit of Botox and hyaluronic to keep a more youthful look ). “historical fiction,” she admitted, momentarily looking at the younger man, then turned her attention back to reading the titles on the spine of the books. “but I have a commission for a horror themed book and I’d like to get more into the…vibe,” she elaborated —or else he wouldn’t have found her in this aisle. “what about you? you like the horror and gore or trying something new out?” she teased.

"Yes, exactly!" August replied to the blonde when she had answered him. He laughed a bit and picked up a book that he had been eyeing. "Yeah, I used to think someone my age is old and yet here I am trying to live my life to the fullest and continue feeling as young as possible because I'm really not all that old yet." He said to her and then went back to looking at another book. As he was reading the summary that was provided, he decided to keep the conversation going. "What kind of books do you like to read?"

[lottie-langford]

──despite the reassurance, her mind was stuck on the previous query. a perplexed, quizzical look formed on her delicate features as she met the younger blonde’s gaze —their eyes were much alike, she caught herself thinking, but the lingering feeling of what she could me by that query did not allow her much time to consider of anything else. her mind was going in overdrive, even as her tone was kept even when she asked “know where you live?” after a moment. did her daughter know who she is? no, she was being silly, she shouldn’t be letting her anxiety get the best of her. Lottie had not know her daughter’s address, it was something the PI she had not given to her ( or maybe she had overlooked it in the report ); she had know she was in Beachwood, but not the exact address. she smiled a little timidly at the following words; she felt so stupid, but this whole interaction had not been intentional.

“I…” a barely audible sigh fell from her lips. “I have seen you on TV, that’s all…” her tone was soft, genuine. “I should…go. thank you for the eggs,” another gentle smile graced her features. she had every intention to leave, couldn’t bring herself to tell her daughter who she is, when the framed photo of Alice with her family drew her attention and without thinking she walked over. her fingertips lightly touched the frame, traced Alice’s face on the photo. “is this you with your family?” she asked, her eyes glue to the photo —she knew of the answer already; she recognized the woman in the photo to be her mother.

⸻ “you are more beautiful in person than on TV…” Lottie said, and Alice concluded in her thought that she was in fact a fan of hers then. ❛ Ohh, grazi! ❜ She never knew how to accept the compliment but she didn't decline it either, her cheeks blushed a tad. ❛ So, how did you know where I live then? ❜ Once more she assumed she was just a fan, who was trying to find out where she lived or whatever is it. ⎯ After handing her the eggs, assuring the older blonde that this will NOT be an issue for her. ❛ Oh, I'm pretty sure it is not like they will be mad about it. We are going to make groceries, I mean… Me. Today, everything in our fridge is sort of empty anyway. ❜ She shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly.

She clasped her own hands together. ❛ Ohh, nice to meet you Charlotte. ❜ Her name rang no bells in her mind. She has no idea who this woman is, not other than being her seemingly neighbor. Her biological mother, a secret kept from her father. There was a picture of Alice and her siblings with her foster parents, but she didn't even look not even a little her "mom". It was clear to see by eyes she was adopted.

❛ So, are you new in Woodside, a fan of mine I assume? And doesn't have eggs at home. Named Charlotte. I am Alice but I guess y'know that already. ❜ She spoke in a light tone to make the environment comfortable for both of them. ❛ Is there anything I might help you, Charlotte? ❜

[lottie-langford]

──Lottie snapped out of her thoughts and shook her head with a smile adorning her lips. “you are more beautiful in person than on TV…” she said, somewhat timidly. she did not mean to ignore her daughter's question, but she also couldn’t really concentrate her thoughts on anything other than the fact that her daughter was standing right there, right in front of her. her heart was still thundering in her chest, but she was trying to control her emotions. another smile adorned her lips at the response and this time she was able to fashion her expression to seem more neutral —not like she was going to have a stroke at any given moment now like a minute ago.

“that is so kind of you,” Lottie smiled once more. “you are sure you are not going to need these?” still, she accepted the eggs that were handed to her. “I don’t want to inconvenience you…or your housemates,” she added after another moment, her gaze still fond as it rested upon her daughter. it only faltered for a second when the younger woman inquired of her name. “it’s Charlotte…” she responded, wondering if her daughter had ever even heard of her name. “I am new in Woodside, actually,” she added in an upbeat tone, an attempt to strike up a conversation.

⸻ The younger blonde was a bit worried that the woman before her was about to have a stroke or something by the expression she made. Maybe she is just a fan of hers, either way… ❛ Is it something wrong on my face or something, ma'am? ❜ She inquired jokily to break the tension because the other woman said no words for a certain period. ⎯ Once she made her way to the fridge, she opened it and checked out for the eggs, she tiptoed to reach them and it was the only two that lasted, she needed to make some groceries and restock everything.

❛ Thanks… But this place also belongs to my friends, Honey and Hunter. ❜ She informed the other woman and handed her the two eggs that lasted and shut the fridge with the kick of her heel. ❛ That's my only eggs. It is not a problem, I will go to make groceries anyway. ❜ Alice told to Lottie, that she had no idea the woman before was just her biological mother. Why would she even look for her? If it was 'told' she died…

❛ Is there anything else I should do for you? I'm sorry, what's your name? ❜

[lottie-langford]

──being fairly new in town, Lottie figured she would do some good to herself and get out of the house; quit the constant picking inside of her mind for how she could meet her daughter. that is how she ended up in the library, in hopes that browsing through the books would distract her mind. and yet it didn’t really help even as she was browsing the different book titles. she picked up a book when a voice gathered her attention and she turned to the younger man with a smile. “oh,” she laughed a little. “we all go through that phase, no?” her tone was light, humorous. “we think adults are too old to do somethings until we are the adults and then…” she trailed off, offered the younger man a timid smile.

Starter for: August & Charlotte @lottie-langford Location: Marquette Public Library

August had run out of books to read and he figured that instead of spending his money on more and more, he'd just invest in a library card and see if something peeked his interest there. So here he was after being a resident for Woodside for a big chunk of his life and this was the first time he had a library card. He walked over to the mystery and thriller section before he saw someone else looking through the books. "Oh good, I'm glad I'm not the only adult coming here. I remember being a little kid and making fun of adults for coming here." August mentioned, shaking his head.

[lottie-langford]

Gillian Anderson for Vanity Fair (x)

[lottie-langford]

──the first words were lost on Lottie; whatever she was telling her daughter it felt like she was going on auto-pilot. her heart beat so hard and fast in her chest that she was sure she was going to faint at any given moment now; yet she remained planted where she was standing, staring at the woman before her. the one person she had longed to see, touch, and hold ever since the day she had lost her when her adoptive family moved away. did her little girl know she was the one who had named her Alice? had she been told by him that he is in fact her father? this despicable, disgusting man, was really her father and the very source of all her life’s misery. she could not be luckier and more thankful that her husband had been so supportive during all the years of her looking for her daughter, even after they had their own child. part of her felt guilty for knowing so much about Alice while she didn’t even know who she was; she wondered what she had been told about her since her adoptive mother sure looked in no way related to her.

she realized she must have been staring at this point so she smiled a little at the explanation her daughter provided. caught herself thinking if she lived alone, she wasn’t sure she had been told by the PI where she lived exactly or with who. embarrassing as it was, Lottie knew of her daughter’s dating history; the ex, the rumored boyfriend. she felt bad for having looked her up online after she had her information from the PI, but she wanted to see her, to know who her daughter was.

“I am okay, yes,” she smiled again, waved a hand dismissively. “you are too kind, thank you…” she added a moment later as she followed the younger woman inside. her eyes remained on her daughter, thinking she must look like some deranged woman amidst having a stroke to the younger blonde. “you have a beautiful house,” she commented, thinking it’d be easier to deflect than focus on what she really wanted to tell her; how she just wanted to hug her and cry for all the years she had been forced to spend away from her.

⸻ If there is something Alice isn't aware is the existence of her biological family. No, she has no idea they are ALIVE and yes, she knows she is adopted. She doesn't even look like anything to her foster mother, physically, just like her brother. All she knew is that the biological family died long ago in an accident, and she even got a document ( which was fake ) that said her 'parents' died ( so she would go and search for them ) , her 'mother' is always afraid of losing her little Alice. One thing she did not know is that her foster father is actually, her biological dad, and her biological mother is alive out there.

Alice was looking at the animal pictures from the shelter, and using the jacket Hunter gave her, she often uses it when he is not around. Her outfit was an oversized royal blue PJ. Honey was out there doing something, she knew the woman would later drag her to do whatever is it she was up to. As for Hunter, she is always excited to see him, despite trying to be very discreet about whatever is happening between her and him ( but failing miserably ) .

Nobody was at home, what is the news… She stood up and went to open the door, surprised to see a blonde woman before her. ❛ Are you an egg? ❜ Because she said I am… Eggs… Alice was starting to think this woman might be one of her fans, only by the reaction she witnessed, it seemed like the other had a heart attack or something… ❛ I think I need to check if I have. I did Carbonara yesterday. I had to use some eggs. ❜ Of course, she had no idea who this woman was. ❛ If you want come inside, I can check if I still have spare eggs for you. You could wait in the living room, but… Are you okay ma'am? You seemed like you were you were not fine, sorry for the intrusion. ❜ Occasionally the Italian accent slips through her tongue, this is why she has a coach to help her not have any accent when she is on screen.

[lottie-langford]

──her nerves had been frail ever since coming to Woodside. the excitement and anticipation of finally finding her daughter, after all these years of desperately searching for her were replaced by nervousness. a constant barrage of what-ifs and likely scenarios playing in her head; doubts, questions, second-guessing. every time she would think she had finally worked up the courage to move herself from the armchair she would lounge on, watching her daughter on TV, she would fall right back to the point she started. it had already happened twice the past couple of days; she would drive out of the station, thinking she could approach Alice, meet her, and finally get to talk to her, she felt determined and unwavering, but the moment her daughter would step outside of the TV station she worked at, Lottie would find herself sinking deeper into her driver’s seat. her body pressed hard against the soft material, desperately trying to make herself disappear, scared the girl would see her and recognize her. afraid that her daughter would loathe her for having given up on her; abandoned her.

she was always half-distracted despite how the talks with her husband helped —and she was angry at herself too, for being so scared when this had been something she had wanted for years, ever since the family moved away from town and she was left in a mess of desperation; knowing where her baby was, watching her from afar, had been her sole lifeline and she lost that, and with that a part of herself.

a quiet, shaky breath fell from her lips, pushing her golden blonde locks out of her face as she pulled her hand back from knocking on the neighbor's door. she should have checked her ingredients before she started baking and now she felt too spent to make a trip to the grocery store for a couple of eggs; it also did not help she was in a sour mood, feeling she was waiting time. her arms crossed against her chest, blue eyes flickering to take in her surroundings. “hi, I am sorry, I was…” she began as she heard the door open, spun around to face the neighbor only to freeze at the sight of her daughter standing before her. the words died on the back of her tongue, her heart beating fast against her ribcage. her eyes studied her now that she was finally seeing her up close; what a beautiful young woman she is, she thought, selfishly also thought she looked like her.

“eggs…” she blurted out after a moment, realizing she had been staring. “if you have two eggs to spare…” her voice a little shaky and she clasped her hands together to stop them from shaking too; the nervousness and anxiety overtaking her, making her wish the ground would open up and she could disappear. ( @lapagliaalice )

[lottie-langford]

— basics

full name: Charlotte Langford.

nickname: Lottie

DOB & age: March 3rd, 47

zodiac sign:pisces 

gender & pronouns: cis woman, she / her

occupation:stay at home wife / hobby painter

neighborhood: beachwood

length of residency: two weeks

traits: gentle, artistic, intuitive / moody, overly trusting, emotional

— about

Trigger warnings: infidelity, child abandonment, parental death, death, pregnancy, depression

Her mother abandoned her at the doorstep of the neighborhood church and disappeared. For the first couple of years she was raised in a convent by nuns until she was adopted at the age of eight by a middle class family. She had a good life with them, even when there were instances that clearly separated her from the family’s biological children, she was still grateful that she had a family, a place to call home. She was determined to not let her circumstances define her though, so she made sure to study and be a good student, wishing to get into college and make something important out of herself. Her plans, however, were interrupted when her adoptive father passed away in a tragic hit and run accident. Charlotte, as she had been named by the nuns, or Lottie as her family used to call her, was soon forced to find work along with the older sibling in order to support the family, her adoptive mother fell into a deep depression and her and her brother became essentially the caretakers of the family.

College became a distant dream as she hardly had time to study, having gotten herself a job as a receptionist in a local doctor’s office by day, a waitress by night. It is there where she met a man with whom Lottie fell in love with him for the way he treated her first, before she could even think of a prospect of a better life. she thought he would help change her circumstances; he spoke of having a family, a future. Even though her life had been far from easy or ideal, she wanted to be a mom, a family of her own. They had been together for nearly a year when she found out she was pregnant; it was terrifying at first, but she was excited. Telling the man she loved the news, however, did not go as planned; he got mad, he called her names, he blamed her for wanting to trap him into marrying her, threatened her to get rid of the child, and then told her he had been married all along, he was only playing with her. Lottie was devastated. She cried, night and day for how she would bring a baby into this world that she could not raise; she couldn’t get rid of her baby, she would rather die with it, and that’s how she ended up confiding to the priest. She was met with understanding and soon he helped her find a woman who wanted to adopt her child as her own; Lottie had seen her at church and since the priest agreed, she thought it was the best for her baby.

She barely got to even hold her baby, ripped out of her hands as soon as she was born; her Alice, she had called her all along, the name she gave to the nurses when they eased her to put her at ease. Lottie cried for months afterwards, found solace in the fact that she could look at her from afar until one day she found that the family moved away. She was once again inconsolable. She spent weeks trying to find them until she packed up and moved away from that place.

Years passed, she did a lot of odd jobs, always moving, never quite forgiving herself for having given her little girl up; she thought she would never find her. Until she met her, now, husband. She had worked for him as a secretary for a couple of years before they started seeing each other, she knew he was divorced, she had been the one his wife had given the papers to. He urged her to look for her little girl from the beginning of the relationship, even after they had their own child together he never asked her to stop looking. It took her years, but when the PI came to her with a name and an address, she broke down crying; of guilt and relief. Her husband was the one who arranged everything for them to move to where her daughter was and she spent the days looking at her on the TV, trying to think of what she would tell her when they would finally meet.

[lottie-langford]

Gillian Anderson t shirt selfies are unmatched