loudenver

[loudenver]

@loudenverauthor: Quit your job, become a full time model. The children can be educated another time.

↳INSTAGRAM: @maverickrojas uploaded a photo:

Ivy told me to “just stand there and look pretty”, so now sure feels as good a time as any to ask… did I pass the test? I think I look more broody than pretty… Sorry little miss! And before anyone asks, I don’t quite understand what the mirror was for either, but I trust her creative decisions!

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Would you like me to keep reminding you that everyone else I've ever had sex with is incredibly inadequate... during?

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: I’m not normal so I want everyone else you’ve ever had sex with to feel inadequate.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Our sex life is not making it into my novel. Please, allow it to inspire your sonnets, though.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Yeah. It can be used as symbolism or something for your second Great American Novel.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: We'll get there, alright?

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Well, yeah.

Wardo: I wanna be with you. In all the ways.

Wardo: I’ll get there, I swear.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Nuh uh. None of that. Louis: I think if the past ten years has taught us anything, it's that we'd wait for each other, kid.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: I’m sorry for being an absolute freak.

Wardo: I know I was high maintenance before.

Wardo: But I know this is next level.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: I'm glad. 'Cause I'm alright, you know? Especially with you. Louis: Don't be stupid, kid. I get it. Louis: That's kinda music to my ears, though. Louis: I want you too.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: I wanna be careful with you. But you’re not fragile, Lou. I don’t think you’re made of glass.

Wardo: It’s stupid. I just get too in my head.

Wardo: I’m not trying to blueball you. I want you so fucking bad it’s embarrassing.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: I wasn't sure. Louis: I was worried you were being careful with me. Louis: Then I realised you were being careful with you, too.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Maybe, although it’s feeling easier to say this when I can’t see your face.

Wardo: You know I want to, right?

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: What have I told you about sexting me at work? [a few minutes pass] Louis: You wanna talk about this in person, kid? Louis: Y'know I'm always happy to go at your pace.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Now I’m the one whining.

Wardo: Anyway, maybe we could take it further than making out. I’m tired of freaking out.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Come home so we can make out?

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: And that’s why NOBODY should be working on a SATURDAY.

Wardo: I miss you. In a big dumb gay way.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: I like my needy boyfriend. It's cute. Louis: Besides, I've been making small whining noises to rival Capote ever since you left this morning.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: You big fucking sap.

Wardo: I’m really sorry for strong-arming you into reassuring me. I don’t wanna be needy. Because I like planning our imaginary wedding too.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Oh my God. You're such a dork. [ten minutes pass] Louis: I'm glad we can be together like this. I'm glad I get to plan my imaginary wedding with you.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: She’s dangling from the ceiling right now. I threw her really high.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Cady play 'speak now'.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: If you say hetero at our wedding I’ll leave you at the altar.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Say 'our wedding' again. I love conforming to heteronormative standards with you.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: IVY would have her and Max’s wedding in a Burger King.

Wardo: (They should do the catering for our wedding though.)

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Always in your writing ability. Not so much in your wedding planning ability. Louis: You'd have Ivy and Max's wedding in a Burger King.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Glad to see your faith in me was temporary, oh great love of my life.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: Bold of you to think you could stand in her shoes... in her.... Chiefs cap?

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: I know her Pinterest password, I’ve got this. Heavy is the head that that wears the Kansas City Chiefs cap.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: How will she be chief bridesmaid at the Tayvis wedding now???

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Just picked Cady up and I’m ready to chuck her across the room if you think about describing Max’s hockey stick.

Wardo: Too late. Flung her clean across the library.

[loudenver]

TEXTING: WARDO Louis: I'll get Ivy to write all the dialogue and sweeping declarations of love. How does that sound? Louis: I'll, of course, be in charge of all the sex scenes. The "spice", so to say.

TEXTING: LOUIS

Wardo: Can’t believe we just got back together and you’ve been bodysnatched.

Wardo: If you make it about a hockey player and photographer and talk in depth about how handsome the hockey player is, I’ll have to fight Max. It’s a matter of honour.