lucheng-shu

[lucheng-shu]

I don't quite think that's quite the tense an answer would usually use, but still if the residence is yours I at least know where to go. Just for my own peace, can I consider myself invited into the building?

6.12.1068, 8:45

Of course you are invited. Your companions, too, should they wish to enter. I’m sure that strange magician of yours would find some interesting things in there. Though perhaps that would make him fear me, too. His strings are only at the edge of my vision, but just a bit longer and I can turn my head to look at them straight on.

[lucheng-shu]

I knew some briefly, and some closer. A satyr and a dryad were my main company - we came from the same court and so, naturally, fell together. They challenged me and helped me grow far more than I ever told them, because of course you'd never say that aloud, and yet they knew the way one knows the shape of their instrument. You'll forgive the lack of names, I don't doubt after I left they earned their courtesy ones and to discuss childhood names isn't my place. So brilliant, both of them.

Sometimes we'd perform together, my arcana blending with the dryad's grace she moved like a bird in flight sometimes and the satyr's raw charisma, we put on such amazing shows. Of course, I came first on our written portion of the examination. Woke up that night to the satyr sprinkling salt into my sheets, chased them around our dormitory for a long while before a matron heard the noise and we had to dive under the covers and pretend to be in trance.

Perhaps I'll leave more tea out tomorrow. For whoever from those woods wishes to take it.

21.4.1068, 00:41

I’m sure the tea has been well-received. The forest likes gifts. They live separately, but it’s not as though they don’t want others to know they are there. I’m sure the sign of respect has been greatly appreciated, not many pay too much attention to them in this day and age. A two-headed cow is a strange thing, so quickly shot down rather than stared at with awe. I suppose that is just how this era deals with things, though I can’t say I support it.

Your friends sound wonderful. Friends should push each other to new heights; and to have known each other as young as school. How joyous. Though your names may change, never forget the joy of being with them. Everything may change, even your idea of the past, but those dear memories are so important.

[lucheng-shu]

Did your shop have any particular warding? A new companion of mine has noticed some very particularly strong protection spells on kne home in Erban, and was curious.

14.5.1067, 21:54

I do. I didn’t expect you to find that, even though I knew you would ask. It’s very old stuff, there’s few nowadays who would be able to keep it up, so I’ve had to let it stay as it is. Not many of this age would be able to recognise it… it’s magic of a bygone age, so to say.

[lucheng-shu]

Of course we wouldn't get such rests in the warmer months, when they'd happen. A waste of time, not to mention how far between they could be with how time would flow. Some of the others would get a 'month' or so at a time, but myself and those who I would spend that time with were formally educated. Plucked to be given a proper education, there was rarely time for it - one doesn't learn seven languages and have months off for childish recreation. We would rest on holidays, and in the spaces between moments.

A story could be nice, though I do understand keeping things hidden. I have seen the creatures people that live there, I left them tea. It seemed to go down well, but I'm still reluctant to enter without permission. Guards have died in there, and I simply don't want me or mine to join those numbers.

17.9.1065, 20:14

I assumed that was the way around here. I’ve never seen students take a day off in all my years in the feywild, but whenever I asked they would turn their noses to me as if they did not understand. Thank you for the straightforward answer, I’m sure spending so much time with your classmates let you get to know them well. What a nice thing it is, to grow up around people your age. I was an only child, and it’s far too late to be able to fill a classroom with people of my age, so I can only imagine.

The forest around Erban was originally the city, as strange as that may sound. Those who called it home were intrinsically tied to the forest. I don’t believe I am at liberty to say how and why, but the life of the forest inherently correlated to the life of those inside of it. When people more the shape and size of us came by, they lived in homes more like the ones you see today. There needed to be space for that, so they would cut the forest down. They didn’t know the stress and harm they were causing to the people in the forest at first. I wasn’t there at that point, but someone who was told me that they were told, and continued anyway. They believed that using the forest’s logs for wood would give protective properties to the houses.

At this point, the most powerful of the forest was in itself the protector of the forest, and the forest itself all at once. I’ve had the opportunity to meet her a few times, but she has generally avoided anyone outside of her kin after years of hurt and betrayal. Though, in this story she still left the forest often. She knew which houses had been made of her and her kin, and would visit them at night. Eventually, she drove out everyone who attempted to destroy the forest, so that she and her people could live. The story goes that she grew to be taller than the buildings and imposed a constant night on the town while she reigned. Afterward, grief overtook her. She went briefly mad. Her tears fed another, the guardian of Erban from then to the present— that is, who I have dedicated my life and work to. I was not allowed to know what happened in those years, when she was plagued by grief, or how exactly they brought her back to reason.

She likes blackberries. I brought her a pie, when I visited, and the mice and squirrels told me she appreciated it. When her name is said in common, she is often referred to as the Canopy. Whether that’s something metaphorical or just a way to secretly refer to her, I do not know. The Belluae adore her, especially those who decided to stay in their natural forms. She often went to meetings with my partner, as they would work together to blend the two aspects of citizenship in Erban together.

As you can see, she has reason to be protective of that forest. She has crow friends that have eyes across the entire forest. You cannot hide from them, but more often than not they will hide from you. If she is told that someone is a threat directly, she will not allow them in the forest. As always, those with the heolfor coroune, that is the symbol of their oath to peace, may pass without question. It has done a lot for both peoples, I am happy that I was able to be a part of that. She would not kill without reason; she simply protects. I think, once you get to know them, that is the culture of the Belluae. I have never asked, but I’ve always wondered if they look as they do to make up for their inherently avoidant, shy nature. I have fought many, and lost my life a grand total of zero times so far.

[lucheng-shu]

I think the two youths that I've had the duty of care over may appreciate me, at least a little. It's a foreign feeling, but still the fact they chose to accompany me to visit a noble (they'll be looked after while I'm busy, don't worry) even if it means being separate from those they know for a while means something. Really do need to figure a proper curriculum for them, though, just language and arithmetic is hardly inclusive.

The woods near Erban, did you know much about them? I haven't delved inside but a colleague seems quite intrigued. It is hardly my business, but still you seem to always have some story or anecdote, my friend.

21.1.1066, 19:32

Perhaps when things settle down, you can take notes from that university you went to. They teach older students, but I’m sure the same idea follows. Consider this their summer holiday- a tradition held in the country you are in. In summer, it can get quite hot, so children are to relax and have fun rather than bake in schools. It also allows them to gain life experience. Perhaps that is different than the feywild.

As for the woods? I know them well. I would traverse them when I needed to return to the city to meet my partner. It is ultimately the safer road to those who are aware of who is inside. I believe the most up to date name for it is Foglia Verde, named for the fact that it is green at all times in the year. The leaves never fully leave the trees. I happen to have heard a story about that, if you would care for it. I am sure those residing would not mind if I dispelled a bit of their mystery. Not all of it, I assure you, but enough to make for a good tale.

[lucheng-shu]

Helping others is what I do best. It just seems I've fallen to helping a new other. The days are perhaps a little monotonous but no worse than my school days. Helping myself is far, far harder to do. I intend to, since it seems to be a common consensus amongst those I have sought guidance from.

Which, if you'll permit me a moment, is bizzare. From you I had come to expect it with your undue kindness towards me, but to hear it from two others in turn, albeit in different words, is definitely a new experience. I would ask you how I do it, how I be a person, but I don't think you could tell me in any meaningful or useful way.

And I would rush to aid you, if I knew how. The gateway to the feywild I knew is shut, planar magic is by far beyond my or anybody who would listen to me's purview, and I don't know where I could even start. I don't know how to help you, one of it seems two people I struggle with that for.

30.6.1068, 19:20

There are many things that we do not know in our youth yet. You are still learning. People are always learning, but especially now. Perhaps you don’t know how to help me yet. Perhaps you don’t know how to be a person yet. Perhaps you don’t see why the advice given to you is often the same yet. The world changes, and so do we. That is a wonderful thing.

If I may borrow the terms, isn’t it just the same as tea? The first round is much more bitter, and the taste changes as you pour it. All are equally important, because they herald the next one. All are appreciated, and meaningful.

[lucheng-shu]

I feel like an update could be warranted, since you seemed to enjoy them last time. Not that I think you won't already know somehow what I tell you.

From no intent of my own, I have found myself caring for two youths. One fey, one not. The fey is such a bright thing, of noble blood from what I have heard, but still is so earnest. Their companion seems a little less disciplined, but I would be lying to you if I didn't admit an odd attachment. If only they'd pay attention in lessons - I have been teaching the pair (and a token few of the village) basic literacy and numeracy, sylvan and common. It will do them well.

The city has been mostly stabilised in ruin, and work has begun to build it up. I think I might stay a while, just to aid. My associate Six has made a drinks shop, and I've offered to hold tea ceremonies there for some extra coin.

The people mourn, but their hearts still beat.

Your friends wanted to know when you were coming back. I hate that I couldn't answer.

16.3.1061, 21:55

I only know because you’ve told me now. It just so happens that I am able to be now, far into the past and future. If you never told me, I would not know.

It sounds like you’re doing good. I can imagine how each day goes by, even though I am not there myself. I would pass by each person often. I remember our individual greetings every morning. They take a while to remember, but I’ve had a lot of time, and my time is my love. I think I’ve said that in detail before, though. I’m glad you can spend your day helping yourself and others. Children need a good amount of guidance, and squandering their youth can lead to a lot of problems as they grow. I would have been worried to the bone about them, so I can only thank you for taking on that task. I’m sure they will, too, when they understand quite what it means.

I shall come back exactly when I am meant to, no sooner and no earlier. That is to say, when you all come and save me. Here, currently, I am equally as saved as I am doomed. Alive as I am dead. Another plane has a concept about that, and I wish it was more common here. There’s no point trying to rush things, because they will happen as they happen. Though, I’m not saying not to rush. There’s a difference, I’m sure you understand it.

[lucheng-shu]

The city is hardly whole, but I suppose I can indulge the game as much as I can - but don't expect much. Faces and names blend together in this sort of stressful busy environment. Nothing like the f ld o d c as. S n was a l be s f oo ot s.

You'll have to pardon the mess of the last message. I think some of the water must have dripped from the ceiling. Nothing important, I assure you.

15.3.1068, 22:00

I don’t know if I can really expect anything, being that I know already the start and end. Don’t let it stress you out too much. Ask your companions, if need be. A problem shared is a problem halved, I believe they say now.

[lucheng-shu]

Three weeks of my time, or three of yours?

And I don't know where your shop is, my friend. It has been years and I mourn that I don't remember who you are, the memory of where your shop is has faded with it.

14.8.1068, 18:10

Three weeks of time in the materia. I’m sure whoever I’ve asked to help with the task will be on the dot.

And, as for where my shop is, I’m sure you do know. I’ve given you the clues already, I believe in your ability to put them together. If you’re not up for my game, I believe you are in company of the lady who is temporarily running it while I am away.

[lucheng-shu]

You'd offer such aid to me? How could I pay you back?

A request like that is complex, you'll understand. I'd ask for something that would help the city, but to have a city reliant on a piece of arcana feels foolhardy. Leads to tyranny, sometimes, in those who hold it.

If I may be selfish, there is one small boon that could be useful. Unlike some of my companions, I was never blessed with the eyes able to pierce the dark and, in a place like this, that leaves one vulnerable and I cannot allow that with so much at stake. Sight, however, has never been my favoured sense, and our discussions of my studies did spring a certain thought to mind.

Since crystals are so audible to me, in how they concentrate the movement and arcana of that around, perhaps the vibrations they emit could be of use to aid perception, almost like a bat or spider. Those small vibrations, used to give a far broader picture of what lay around. Then I could still be aware enough to aid those around me and manage what needs to be without being a burden.

Still, this could all be nonsense. You don't owe me any such item.

10.11.1069, 15:15

I suppose saying it is a gift for all you’ve done for me this far won’t suffice, will it? Well then, in return for a boom I should only ask that you take care of yourself, inside and out.

As the designated Eyes of my comrades, I find things to do with sight so much more intuitive. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy a little challenge, I shall simply have to remember the lessons I was taught by the Ears. Perhaps give it three weeks or so, then check in my shop. This can be a little experiment for us both. I am excited to see what you find there.

[lucheng-shu]

13.9.1067, 11:46

I’ve been trying to think. I am not there, with you, but that does not mean there are not parts of me left in the Materia. My work will be left unscathed, a mere bit of fire, unmagical or otherwise, could not touch them. But I’ve never had this problem before. I wonder if something I make here, now, I could somehow transport back.

I’ll think about it. In the meantime, if you can think of something that would help in this situation, please ask for it. When I am not a wanderer, I make magical items. I do not know if I have ever mentioned this. I’m not the best of my group, but the things I make can serve well enough.

[lucheng-shu]

I hope you will not waste me, once I come to my end then. Should it be you that what's left crumbles to dust before, that is. My court certainly wouldn't - there is much use in building materials even if they have been formed in an inadequate shape. Sometimes old pots can be crushed down to dust, and if mixed with the proper amounts of water, remade to bricks for houses to build what comes next. Well, water I say simply since that is easiest, any liquid works.

Still, I have not hardened yet, and this climate is hardly encouraging that of me. My rage still simmers, but I can temper it enough to be of aid. For now, for you. For them.

For yourself, too, I would hope. Rage does not feel nice, even to those who convince themselves otherwise because it’s all they know. Sometimes, though, I understand that it is necessary.

[lucheng-shu]

Picking up the pieces of other's mess, to atone for a mere drop of mine. These shards will cut something, but it shouldn't be that what I left is sidelined to clean for others. More people will be sliced open.

You hold such a fondness for beasts, in every word you pen. Not all of them deserve that, though. Burden or not, once a steed has its leg snapped one too many a time and it cannot race, or a bovine has one too many calves and their muscles grow too weak, they will be slaughtered the same.

Do you eat meat?

15.3.1064, 19:20

Perhaps I am biased toward creatures like that. I had grown with them, and have now lived with such “beasts” for many years. I understand them better than people, at least.

I try to avoid meat when I can. However, I also refuse to waste a death. Though it goes against the way the world should be, if I am to find a bird with a broken wing, I return it to how it once was when I can, and when I cannot, I teach it to fly in other ways. There is never a universe where you cannot make yourself good at something. The Materia shifts so easily, once you can no longer serve your first responsibility, you simply live. For yourself, for others, to find another thing to do. It is an opportunity here. To just exist, regardless of your role and what others say you are supposed to do. The only hierarchy in life is yourself and time, and even then, you choose whether you sit above, below or on it.

[lucheng-shu]

We aren't cattle, cattle are raised to slaughter. One wouldn't waste their time keeping correspondence with cattle, their use is only to devour. And I have too much work to be done to celebrate, even if I had friends allies who would celebrate with me. Six hardly has the time. What would I be if I dismissed my responsibilities for such things? No, my work will continue.

19.8.1067, 18:50

I apologise. It’s a turn of phrase. Perhaps the idea of a shepherd does not translate so well into feywild culture. If you’d allow me to say something continually rude, cattle may also refer to beasts of burden. Perhaps it’s not out of turn to say that, because what are we all in this moment but burdened with responsibility? Picking up the pieces.

You need not stop to celebrate. When I travel from place to place, I thank my body for carrying me each day; I thank my eyes for allowing me to see. I thank all that is inside of me for allowing me to be. I thank you and your group for things you haven’t done yet. As there are an infinite amount of things to celebrate, there are an infinite amount of ways to celebrate them. You don’t need time, I promise you I would know that. Just appreciate, and what is lost will never be forgotten. What is gone will return.

[lucheng-shu]

I can understand the earth of this place, everything seems to be more physically minded, but even with your words I can't help but think I should be better than this. The matrons never spoke of such a difference in those that are sent, only that we are doing a duty and should be commended for it. If it would have such an impact, some warning would be put in place.

There were celebrations, occasionally. Of the sacrifices that a FēngmìGōu were making for the good of the court. We drunk honeyed teas and some of the scarce few who had come back to the court would get to sit with the matrons or, once, with those who spoke with the Chorus. All in uniform like cherished trophies, each with a chain across their shoulders like a mantle. Each section had a small jade bead, one for each they'd taken. I never got to see how mine would have looked, even with my own ugly mimicry. For the best, most likely.

You do know so many people. I took you from so many. Would you have anything to tell any of them, if I could do that for you?

18.4.1065, 15:07

If you knew, perhaps there is a world where you wouldn’t have performed your duties with as much efficiency as they would have wanted you to. The cattle don’t know the taste of grass in another field. They’ve made you a better worker for it, but the materia doesn’t work like that. Only very few people have roles they have to fill, and they take the gifts and burdens on fully. Neither is a better way of life, they are just so different. You could not have known this.

I hope the celebration for your return is exactly how you would want it; but there each step is a celebration. To put one foot in front of the other is an achievement, in the day and age you are in. People are recovering from great sorrow. I’m sure that if you asked; your dear friends would throw you a party. Perhaps in the wake of this, it is needed.

As for me, I’ve been around a long while, it’s only natural I would know many people. Perhaps you leaded, but I did follow, and that was my own choice. You have taken many, but not me. I left. Do not let that weight hang on your shoulders, that is where your cape should rest, no? If you could relay a message, if you would know who to talk to, then they will know it’s me if I do not ask for forgiveness; but instead say I will see them again soon, and to trust in my design. I’m sure the second will go unsaid anyway.

[lucheng-shu]

Do emotions always feel so much more violent on this plane? It could be the chaos of it, bordering the Hells as it is, but I was never this tumultuous before. I felt sorrow and anger and joy, I must have, but not like this.

Knowing this won't change anything, but still I find myself asking, hungry for an explanation. Is it something wrong with me?

7.12.1067, 9:54

That is entirely possible. The planes of the Hells aren’t as chaotic as you’d think, the problem is more likely with the Materia itself. In academia, we categorise the “feelings” and “make-up” (not exactly, but it’s best layman term I can find) of a plane by multiple categories. The feywild and the materia are both masculine (highly deceptive language; it’s to do with the debated beginning of the plane then given a name to do with a myth) so theoretically you should feel more at home there, but the materia is an earth plane and the feywild is an air one, which I’m sure makes some sense to you, so there is a large of disconnect despite how close the feywild is to the materia.

Many people who travel planes for longer periods of time have claimed differences. Some physical, some mental, and there’s not enough decisive evidence at the moment to say exactly why this is, but some of my colleagues have wonderful theories. Well, all this to say that yes what you’re feeling is normal. You aren’t strange, or wrong, or dealing with this in a subpar way. A lot of people go through this, and they are still good, they are still themselves. One of my colleagues described it as the materia burrowing deep, seeing inside of you and making it blossom to the surface, no matter how far inside you’ve buried it. I wonder then if it was my influence that has made things this way, but perhaps it is applying too much power to myself. I am just a watcher, I have not intervened in that place for a long while now. Far before this age, in fact.

[lucheng-shu]

I give people comforts because that is what I was made to do and I do it damned well. I play my part and I look them in the eyes even if I forget the faces that surround them, but they know it's a lie deep down. Only a coward would hide that. They don't know he's a lie, can't smell the stench of what he has done to them on him. Parading himself like he is worth it. Surely you don't think he did what was right, even by your planes standards?

There are children, at this camp, young ones only given a chance by the effort of another companion that will grow in the wake of his vile lack of discretion. Gutting him would be a mercy, and too easy an escape.

4.6.1060, 12:32

As a being one-step separated from mortality, as my role imparts me my brief amount of knowledge and vast amount of love, I have known this was going to happen for too long, I have seen it happen too many times. Wrong or right, things will happen. It is the right of the people of this plane to commit wrongs, so whether it is his right or his wrong, for the sake of time and space I cannot say.

But, I am not just an envoy of light. I was once a person, too. And that person has had to refuse contact for a long while. It is still mortal of me to grow greatly wrathful from being slighted, and misused and for the health of my people and my partner’s to be so carelessly tossed away. If I had stayed, perhaps my writings would not reflect the lessons I have been taught and wish to teach. I don’t doubt my entwined threads on your plane are dealing with some incredible self-discipline to not let grief make a slaughter.

Of the three of us, I was always the most merciful. That is why I had to abstain from correspondence. You were never alone, though. More people claim to act selfishly than they do in my plane. There are people who not view you different if you had said any of this to them, because it is not in their nature to pick people apart for their use. Perhaps I misjudged, back then, and he was not one of them.