lucid-scout

[lucid-scout]

i feel like we as a digital society have forgotten the important rules of the internet

Don't feed the trolls

Never give out personal information

Anonymity is the best defense

Don't click suspicious links

Don't click popups and ads

Just because it's written doesn't mean it's true

You are responsible for your own experience

There is porn of everything, act accordingly

[lucid-scout]

guys oh my god they invented a thing called friends. and they love you and want to talk to you and be around you. has anyone heard of this

[lucid-scout]

It’s practically 2014 and you guys still don’t know how to google if an article is real or not before giving it 100,000 notes

[lucid-scout]

Just some of my favorite Letterboxd reviews of Thunderbolts*…

SPOILERS FOR THUNDERBOLTS* BELOW THE CUT:

[lucid-scout]

[lucid-scout]

i just think itd be funny if kittypets were a little more familiar to twoleg things such as: cars and bad words

[lucid-scout]

I saw pill bugs on here a few weeks ago and really wanted to make my own! The pattern is a bit rough but I hope it works (I tried to get it perfect for like a week before calling it good enough).

Just print out (or copy from a screen) the first page and cut out the pattern pieces. Hopefully the pictures on page two will help but if not I will do my best to answer any questions!

Hope you enjoy and make your own lil isopod friend!

If anyone makes this, I would love to see pictures 💕

[lucid-scout]

[lucid-scout]

How is bnha anime of the decade...... they aren’t even anime of the hour of the minute of the second

[lucid-scout]

the posts on my timeline are talking to each other

[lucid-scout]

some fucking resources for all ur writing fuckin needs

* body language masterlist

* a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does

* a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes

* 550 words to say instead of fuckin said

* 638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again

* some more body language help

(hope this helps some ppl)

[lucid-scout]

Hey kid you want a job?

Great get online and go to a job board. Indeed, Linkedin whatever. Now you're gonna search for a role that's in your city, fits your qualifications, and doesn't seem like a bad time.

See that easy apply button? Don't hit it they just throw those in the trash. Now you're gonna want to go to the company's website and check their careers page.

Oh? That job doesn't exist anymore. Cool go back to the job board and find another one.

Great you found another job, you're on the company's career page and the job exists!! So you're going to need to make an account on the career page website. They're using Workday, the same site as the last job you applied for? Who cares? You need to make another account for THIS job's workday page.

Now you're going to upload your resume. That'll autopopulate about 15 boxes with everything on your resume, except formatted wrong and with tons of errors. So just go through and painstakingly check the dates on all of that and rewrite everything you already laid out in an aesthetically pleasing format on your resume.

Ok time for the cover letter, explain why this specific job and company are deeply important to you. You love their mission statement and wouldn't even laugh if their ceo was gunned down in the street. You'll really want to reiterate the things you just spent the last 20 minutes filling out on the resume section

(Remember to include language from the job description, people who work in HR are lower than dogs and they need patterns or they get confused.) Write about a page, but hey don't sound too desperate or robotic this is where they judge your character!

Maybe add your portfolio site at the end here, who knows if that helps no one has ever clicked mine haha.

Anywayyy time to hit apply! Congrats! You'll see that confirmation email come in and you should be getting the rejection letter in about 2 weeks. Unfortunately your resume didn't have the right buzzwords and the AI auto rejected you :(

Time to start again and try not to kill yourself!

[lucid-scout]

Do it for the meme. http://blinkingguy.com

[lucid-scout]

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

[lucid-scout]

[lucid-scout]

i read the hobbit in 3rd grade and i thought it was really lame. however i liked bilbo baggins for some reason and i was fully convinced he was some sort of rabbit/mouse thing until i saw the lotr movies and was really, really confused

[lucid-scout]

I've noticed more and more in public bathrooms that people skip the handwash and just take a squirt of hand sanitizer from wall dispensers on the way out. hand sanitizer is NOT effective against most things that come out of your ass. i cannot stress this enough. i'm begging y'all. please. please please please please please use the soap.

i'm out here immunosupressed fighting for my life to not get naturally selected while people around me touch a public toilet handles and walk back to their tables to immediately eat a burger