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[im ded]

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found this three year old draft buried in my files. is it funny? I don't remember

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I Wanna know about the wip where MBJ is the dumb one!

Oh I'm so happy you asked!!! I haven't talked about this one at all until now!

So you know how there are some fanfics where moshang get married but Shang Qinghua has no idea it's happening until the day of even though he's the one who planned it? Imagine something like that, but it's Mobei Jun who doesn't realize they're getting married.

Mobei Jun is going around trying to sabotage his arranged wedding plans, disrupt Shang Qinghua's planning, and so whatever he can to prove to Shang Qinghua that he wants to marry him, not some demon hussy all without realizing HE'S ENGAGED TO SHANG QINGHUA WHO IS ACTIVELY PLANNING THEIR WEDDING!

It's so silly stupid and I just think Mobei Jun deserves to be the dumb one every now and then :)

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when i was 11, i got kicked out from my local pool because i threw a plastic chair in the water. i was frustrated and considered a low-risk thing to throw in, basically, since i thought it was just plastic and wouldn't get damaged or leave residue in the water. mom read me the email she got from the center, where they worried that i was going to throw a baby in the pool, or a computer. id gone outside the acceptable window of behavior, and suddenly everything was equivalently threatening and condemnable. i was now a kid who'd proven myself capable of anything. this is a weird thing ive noticed, you just can't compare harms beyond a certain point, you're not allowed, it's all the same. maybe i shouldn't have thrown a chair in the pool, but it was very different from throwing in a baby.

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I like how there’s a category of careers (cowboy, pirate, spy, princess) that have a very specific historical and political context that they get stripped of for the entertainment of children

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Whoever said frogs say "Ribbit" was being incredibly reductive some of these guys do say "Ribbit" but a lot of them be saying "ᴮᵉᵉᵖ" some of them be saying "Waauu" and some of them be saying "Fuck" but I don't know who taught them that one.

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I think about this a lot.

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I think now that queens dead they should have her stuffed and put on display in Cairo for the next 150 years.

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this is so wild

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@wholesome-animal-images

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can’t think of a worse feeling than coming up with a really great meme, like, 2 months after the image format dies

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We've had Eldritch Horror Jolene and "The singer is in love with Jolene" but I just saw this youtube comment suggesting Jolene is a personification of death and I'm absolutely floored by it.

Like holy shit. "Flaming locks of auburn hair" just being literally flames, "Emerald eyes" being an unearthly green glow. The "ivory skin" line referring to the paleness of bloodless skin or even bleached bone, and yet Jolene is still spoken of as having haunting, enticing beauty, like a sort of angelic figure. The husband "talking about her in his sleep" meaning he's delirious with fever and keeps talking like he knows he's going to die. Of course the narrator can't compete with, or do anything about, a literal force of nature.

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I think venus flytraps should be intelligent and ambulatory. I think they should get into the cupboards. I think they should purr when you pet them.

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