lulkuqenenmure-blog

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[lulkuqenenmure-blog]

T ecësh mbi kujtime apo mbi xhama t thyer?!

[lulkuqenenmure-blog]

A day before death

You feel no fear, no pressure, no pain anymore. All of that is gone. You just see, thoughts, and feelings. A day before your soul stops existing. You start thinking about everything you’ll leave behind. Every person. Your family, your friends, the same smiles at the coffee shop you used to get everyday, all the streets of that amazing city, all the people who used to wave at you from afar when you walked on the crosswalk. You start thinking about all the feelings you gave people when you helped them, let them down, broke them .. loved them. Will they even remember you ten years after you’ve gone? Maybe. But that’s not what it’s about. Let’s stop for a second and try to think, how is tomorrow going to be, when you won’t be here? People will cry, best friends will hear the news and will stay shocked and after that they’ll start telling their other friends what happened. The love of my life just doesn’t want to exist anymore, will cry her heart out hoping I’ll wake up and then will run to her bed, saying she should have done more. My neighbors, maybe it’ll be the first time they won’t be happy that they ain’t hearing loud music bumping at 1AM. But, will I be missed after some time? Like for real, after a year, will they feel my abstance? Will they remember me? Will my friends one day at midnight say “I miss him man”? I don’t know. I have no idea. They say when we die, we can watch the living, in some way we can protect our close ones. If that’s true then I’ll be able to see it. I want to, actually. I want to see when my homies smoke by the beach without me, play sports without me, crack jokes without me, hear the new Drake shit without me. I want to see my girl’s pain fade away day by day until she finds the right one for her. I want to see how everyone that loved me, got over it, and in the end, got happy. Yeah I know it’s weird, being happy to see people you loved starting to forget about you and .. I don’t know. And my mom? I don’t want to see her. That’s the only person who’ll never get over it. So, these are the thoughts someone gets, 24 hours before stops existing. The most important thing, is at the end of the day, you gave love all your damn life, you gave your energy to do good and to make the ones you love happy, and I guess that’ll set your soul free. Love.”