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Torn between life and death

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the sirens wouldnt even have to sing beautiful or anything. id still come over to the shallows and rocks to see whats up see whats happening. whats all going on

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*sees my mutuals logged on at the same time* ugh WHAT a day. Thank god you’re here. *doesn’t interact with them in any shape or form*

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creepypastas dont scare me because i know that somewhere on youtube theres a video of that creepypasta being in a yaois with another creepypasta and so theyre not scary anymore

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Achilles wouldn’t have died if he was wearing OSHA approved work boots.

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fucking hate how cats think they can mrrp their way out of anything because yeah, they fucking can.

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I’m like the opposite of a catholic. all sex is fine except sex for reproduction

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 Hey btw, another worldbuilding thing: You can, and actually should have weird and impractical cultural things. They’re not inherently unrealistic, for as long as you address the realistic consequences as well.

 Let’s say you’ve got a city where there’s tame white doves everywhere. They’re not pests, they’re regarded as sacred, holy protectors of the city, and the whole city cares for them and feeds them like they’re pets. They’re so tame because it’s a social taboo to hurt or scare one. Nice pretty doves :)

 Then someone points out that even if they’re not seen as pests, doesn’t having a completely unchecked feral pigeon population - that not only isn’t being culled, but actively fed and cared for - mean that there would be bird shit absolutely all over the place?

 A part of you wants to say no, because these are your nice, pretty doves. To explain that there’s a reason why they’re not shitting all over the place, maybe they’re super-intelligent and specifically bred and trained to not shit all over the place. The logistics of how, exactly, could anyone breed and train a flock of feral birds go unaddressed.

 An even worse solution would be to not have those birds, editing them out of the world. No, they spark joy, you can’t just toss them out!

 Now, consider: Yes, yes they would, but the city also has an extensive public sanitation service that’s occupied 90% of the time by cleaning bird shit off of everything. One of the most common last names in the area actually translates to “one who scrapes off dove shit”, and it’s a highly respected occupation. And thanks to the sheer necessity of constantly regularly cleaning everything, the city enjoys a much higher standard of cleanliness, and less public health issues caused by poor public sanitation.

 The doves do protect the city. By shitting fucking everywhere.

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my name is Elmo Sesamstraße and for the last three months i have been roaming the streets of Nowy Jork trying to uncover the mystery of who divorced me

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she's thinking on how hawt it'd be if jeff the killer was w her rn *loveydovey sighhhh*

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Caught in the Crossfire - An angsty Royai fanfic about their time in Ishval

Roy Mustang was brought to the front lines of the Ishvalan War as a human weapon. Each day had been filled with bloodshed - this wasn't how he wanted to use his alchemy.

What he hadn't expected was Riza Hawkeye - the daughter of his alchemy teacher - to show up wearing the military blues, ready to fight alongside him. It was a reminder of the things he was fighting for and a reminder that her couldn't give up - but the war wasn't over yet.

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phineas and ferb really said “how many characters can we make autistic” and the answer was “yes”