lunulate

[lunulate]

Sunday yet again. I would have written more about last weekend except that I waited too long and now I’ve forgotten what I did then. As far as I recall, it wasn’t much...I mostly just called family, watched some game streams, and got nothing done. I also did my laundry at one point.

I would feel guilty about not writing earlier, but this week has been a real doozy. A lot happened in just the past few days (even past few hours), I’m not sure I can write it all here.

I went to my only in-person class on Monday, left the asynchronous one until later and basically just wasted time worrying about my upcoming flight. I did take a lovely video of the sea though and had lunch with a classmate. We talked about our plans and pets. 

My other roommate left on Tuesday, so I had the dorm for the rest of the day. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to see her off because I had to attend a group meeting (my regular Tuesday class, which our group project was actually for, was also asynchronous that day). I dropped by the campus bookstore to buy some plushies for my sisters but they were all sold out...actually the campus has been packed with visiting families lately. I guess Thanksgiving is prime time for prospective students to come? 

I missed my in-person class on Wednesday because the bus either came really early or not at all. I felt very guilty about it, but when I hopped on Zoom (this class offers a Zoom option), I was surprised by how many people were also there. I think very few people actually came in person, which is kinda sad but understandable.

After my class ended, I had lunch then started packing. I don’t really bring a lot (especially since it’s only for a few days) so I finished quickly. I had a lot of time left and that made me very anxious. I got so fidgety that I left early even though my flight wasn’t for over five hours. To my surprise, the bus down to the metro center wasn’t crowded at all. Only one guy got on the same stop as me—he was holding a small instrument case. I had expected it to be packed like last time but I guess most students already left by this time. Honestly, campus was kinda like a ghost town, a lot of people already left last weekend.

We got to the metro center earlier than I expected, so I was worried about the long wait for the next hourly bus to the large nearby city where the airport is located. But apparently they ran an extra bus(es?) because of Thanksgiving so I didn’t end up waiting long. I was happy but at the same time, I realized I would be getting to the airport really early. The bus ride was less enjoying this time around because there was no open window.

I made it to the train station, got on the light rail, and got off at right stop. The guy with instrument case was there too—I guess he was also going to the airport. And now this is the embarrassing part, because despite having done this before, I start walking the wrong way. I followed the guy with the instrument case because it seemed like we were going to the same place. 

He had apparently never been here before though, so he eventually turned back so I had too as well. He was very nice though, we walked together part of the way and then he continued on towards the airport (he decided to walk there, while I waited for the bus). I wish I got his name, he even wished me a Happy Thanksgiving (of course I responded likewise).

I got on the bus to the airport and was feeling good because I’d be in the airport in no time and with still three hours to spare...or so I thought. As the bus approached my terminal, I pulled on the cord to request the stop. But apparently I didn’t pull hard enough, because the bus went straight past the terminal and onwards. I was so shocked, I didn’t pull the cord immediately again and only got off two stops later, surprisingly far from the airport.

It was a really dark and isolated area so I was really scared. I walked across the street to the other bus stop and called my youngest sister to distract myself while waiting. The bus was so late, I was afraid it would never come but eventually it did and this time I did get off at the terminal. 

I went through security quickly and found my gate...I was still two hours early. So I sat down and tried to catch up on homework, but eventually I gave up and started to draw instead. And something kinda funny happened. Just before we were about to board, the guy sitting next to me suddenly at the gate asked me if I had an Instagram. He said he was surprised that I didn’t have one for my art and also would I draw his dog if he gave me a picture? And I explained that I was very bad at drawing animals.

The plane trip was fine, but very turbulent near the end so that was scary. And when I got off, I couldn’t find Bàc Phương at first so it took a while for me to find her car. And then when I got into the car (Bàc Loan and Jerry was there too), they told me that they had waited for over an hour because Mom gave them the wrong time.

I was pretty mad, since I had already told them before but then they told me that Bàc Anh (Bàc Loan’s husband) had suffered a heart attack earlier in the day (actually it apparently started about a week ago) and was now in the hospital. I was really shocked but they seemed reluctant to talk about it. We got home late, I talked with my grandparents and played with my sisters, then went to sleep.

The next day was pretty somber. We went to visit Bàc Anh in the hospital but only two visitors were allowed, so my sisters and I sat outside while Bàc Loan (she’s staying over with us while he’s there) and bà went up. We talked to him a bit over the phone and then we went home.

Dad came over and we had a Thanksgiving dinner mosty consisting of mashed potatoes and green beans. Dad told us about his business and my sisters and I had a freak-out (I can’t say exactly what he revealed but let’s just say he basically admitted that he only thinks about making money).

The next day we left to spend time with Mom. She took me to see ông . We had a huge day after Thanksgiving lunch

[lunulate]

It’s Sunday again—I guess my writing day has moved from Saturday to Sunday. Nothing much happened last Sunday except that I finally talked to Lena again. We had another really long phone call that was mostly them talking and me listening. It was nice to catch up with each other though.

On Monday, I visited Genesis to give her a birthday present (it was last Wednesday but I left that day). Jace was there too and after I mentioned how cool I found creative writing to be, read me some of their poetry and a nonfiction piece. Afterwards they gave me a reading of my birth chart using a system I had never heard of before. I know a little about astrology, but this combined elements of that with other doctrines. It was a lot to digest.

I got my midterm back on Tuesday and got a lower grade than I was hoping for. My professor kindly offered the class midterm corrections for half the points back and I’m definitely taking her up on that, but I was still disappointed.

I had a huge assignment due Wednesday (that research proposal) so I worked all day on that and turned it in a few hours before the deadline. I hope it gets a good grade because it stressed me out so much.

Thursday I volunteered at the reserve again and talked a lot with Ashley. She recommended me a book that sounded cool but that I forgot the name of. I’ll have to ask her next time I see her or text her (we exchanged numbers). We weeded wild radish in an area I’ve never been to before. There were so many, but I had a lot of fun. We listened to a podcast about mosses while we worked.

Mom texted me that there was going to be a cool eclipse that night (really early the next morning) so I stayed up to watch that. I couldn’t find the moon at first because it was so cloudy (at one point it even started raining) but I waited it out and finally saw the moon. It was worth it, I took so many pictures. I might have made a nuisance of myself because I played music and ate chips while waiting. I woke up late and with a huge headache the next morning though...at least I got to see one of my roommates off (she left early for Thanksgiving break).

Wow, Thanksgiving is in a few days, I can’t wait to go home. Two of my classes cancelled in-person sessions, but I’m still staying until Wednesday. I’ll write more about my weekend later!

[lunulate]

It’s Sunday again, I meant to post much earlier (and it’s already pretty late as I’m writing this) but I have a good reason for my timing. This week I went had a major assignment due and I also went home for the long Veterans’ Day weekend! I actually got back yesterday and boy do I have a story to tell!

But first, let’s start with Monday. I ran into Genesis in the bathroom that morning. She needed to print some short stories out so I asked her to email the files to me and promised to print them when I got back from classes. I did poorly on a quiz in my first one, and completely zoned out of lecture in the second one (I had a lot of work the night before and slept badly). As soon as I got out of that one, Genesis texted me asking if I was back yet. Apparently she needed them before her class in an hour. The bus was late so I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to print them out in time. I hurried off as soon as we arrived.

The door to Genesis’s room was open as I passed and Jace was there so they got up and followed me into mine. Jace asked to use my printer too, so I just had them email me their files and I printed them all out. It was a lot more than I thought, because it was not only their short stories, but their classmates’ as well. Then I finally went to lunch. 

Tuesday was no less hectic. I missed the first half hour of class to watch a conversation Michelle Obama was holding for her book and while that happened there was a huge commotion outside over a Great Horned Owl getting caught by animal rescue. I was worried about getting to the airport the next day, stressing over a big assignment, and struggling to figure out my schedule for next quarter because the enrollment period was coming up soon. But I printed out my ticket, made a travel itinerary, and planned out my courses. I was still struggling with the assignment, a research proposal draft that required hours of reading studies and writing.

Wednesday was so busy. My first class went fine, we went over the midterm and I got a good grade, but my second one (which the big assignment was for) was moved online suddenly because the professor got ill. So I got on the bus back to main campus, ate lunch, and half-paid attention to the lecture while I packed for my flight. My Zoom kept cutting out, so I didn’t really feel guilty about it. After lecture ended, I finished up packing (just my backpack and a luggage with four items), said good-bye to my roommates (I forgot to tell them I was leaving that day but they were so sweet and told me to text them when I got off the plane), and then left for the bus.

Either it didn’t come or I just missed it (although I checked the schedule and was sure I didn’t?) but I waited a while for the next one to come. I was worried that bringing my luggage on board would be rude but I think it was okay, even though it did take up a lot of room. I ended up sitting next to a girl holding a big instrument case, I was really curious what it was but I was too shy to ask. I was lucky to get a seat because the bus got super crowded fast. It was so packed that at some point we had to stop letting people on.

I was really worried about getting to the metro center late (and consequently missing the hourly bus that would take me into the city where the airport was located), but I tried to enjoy my ride. It was a long one. Some notable passengers (besides the girl with the huge instrument case) was a group of people holding balloons for someone’s birthday (they took up a lot of room) and a guy with a cute guitar keychain from Kauai hanging on his backpack. I was so tempted to reach out and tell him how much I liked it but he left before I could. It might have been creepy anyways?

I got to the metro center just in time. I wasn’t sure where to find the bus at first but I caught sight of it and ran over. It was my first time paying a fare for the bus, and I’m afraid I took a while to feed it into the machine although I already had all the money counted out and prepared. I sat at the back of the bus, luckily in the only seat with an open window. I was really happy because the wind coming in was so nice. A girl with pretty hair sat next to me, across from me were two Filipino(?) students and there was four other passengers at the very back of the bus including two ladies who realized a quarter of the way through that they forgot something very important and had to get off at an impromptu stop.

The ride was very long because of traffic and it got dark fast because of Daylight Savings Time but I didn’t mind, mostly because of the open window. Most of the people around were worried though because they had a train to catch and were afraid of being late for it. I was especially worried for the two Filipino students across from me, the girl (who kept staring at me throughout the ride) was especially panicking. We did get to the station late but in time for the train. 

I didn’t have a train to catch but I got lost at the station looking for the light rail line I was supposed to take. I ended up walking up to the ticket window and asking for directions, and fortunately the very nice man there helped me. I managed to find it but by this time I was tired and a little scared. The light rail wasn’t coming for a while either. Luckily I met a nice guy (I suspect he was also a student who came on a later bus) who was also going to the airport. He had a transportation app downloaded and everything so I just followed him from the light rail to the airport bus. He got off at the terminal before mine, I was a little sad I didn’t get his name because he helped me so much. 

I accidentally went to baggage claim when I got to my terminal, but I was good once i found my way. I already printed out my ticket so I went straight through security and then to my gate. I was actually there an hour early so I just listened to music and tried to get work done. Then it was time to board. I managed to lift the luggage up by myself (well there was only four things in there) and I got an aisle seat. I think it went pretty well for my first flight.

I got a little mixed up when I arrived and Bác Phương yelled at me over the phone but when I got in, Jerry and bá was there! You already know bá, but Jerry is one of my cats (I have two; the other one is named Janet) and I love him so so much. I’m surprised I haven’t mentioned him before (I did say I have cats though right?) but I love that cat more than almost anything. He was really quiet when he saw me, but he nuzzled my hand and was uncharacteristically gentle. He normally bites or scratches but he let me pet him the whole ride. 

There was a lot of traffic, so it was late by the time we got home. I had dinner in the car. Once we arrived, I jumped out to greet ông. He stayed up for me even though he normally goes to sleep early. I played with the cats although Jerry was back to his grumpy self (he really needed to pee and dashed to the litter box as soon as we let him in), talked with everyone, worked on my homework, called my sisters, and then finally went to sleep. I used to be a late sleeper before I transferred to my college but I hadn’t gone to bed at this time in a while, so it was hard! 

The next day I went to mom’s house to see my sisters. I was so happy to see them again even though I’ve been calling them regularly. We’re really close although we fight all the time. We caught up and I got into an argument with my youngest sister. We all went to IKEA where we played around with all the layouts and took pictures. Near the end we got ambushed by two kids who were nice but loud. Unfortunately we were too late for IKEA’s frozen yogurt, but we had fun. We got back just in time for ông to pick us up. We had instant ramen, played with the cats, and stayed up talking and doing our own thing. 

Friday was my last full day at home. I tried to make the most of it but I woke up late and still had homework to finish. Honestly, the day was a blur. Dad came over and talked with us and we had a big fish dinner. Jerry ran across the street and I had to chase him down. He was very angry but tired by time I caught up to him. I was miserable at the prospect of going back to school the next day. I had to wake up early for my flight, but my sisters kept me up...I was really tired the next morning. 

Bác Phương drove me to the airport early because I was paranoid about missing my flight. I regretted it though because I got through security relatively quickly...I could have spent that time with my family. I seriously almost cried saying good-bye that morning. Actually though, getting through security was embarrassing. Both my backpack and luggage got flagged for review. The former was because of my stapler but the latter was because Bác Phương packed a bunch of food inside without my knowing—including a huge bottle of vitamins. It was so bad, I turned bright red. 

The flight went smoothly and I was feeling optimistic about finding my way from the airport to campus. After all I had gotten to the airport before right? This was the same thing, just in reverse. Except I got on a bus going the wrong way and got off at a distant stop. I was so scared, I was literally about to cry. Luckily I met someone else trying to get to the airport so I waited with them at the bus stop and went back.

I finally reached the correct stop only get on the wrong light rail...I felt so stupid for real. It wasn’t a huge mistake because I could transfer later, but it gave me extra anxiety. There was a cute kid on my ride and her mother kept pointing out things and repeating their names. I called my sisters and told them what had happened which was a mistake because they proceeded to tell my family that I was lost which I wasn’t. I then transferred and got to the station. 

Amazingly I wasn’t late despite all the mistakes I made...the bus I needed to take back to my university town ran hourly so I had a lot of time to spare. I ran to the bathroom (I’d been needing to go bad) and settled myself down on a bench for the wait.

While sitting, I was approached by two creeps who tried to engage me in conversation. I ignored them but they hung out near me and I found out to my chagrin that they were also Vietnamese. Anyways the bus arrived but Bác Phương called me right at that moment wanting to know where I was. I was really mad at my sisters then. I eventually got on the bus where I got texts from my mom, dad, and uncle...yeah. 

I enjoyed the ride back although the sun was in my face for most of the ride. I really regretted not bringing my hat. What’s funny is that there were two old guys sitting in the row across from me and they were talking passionately about Phoebe Bridgers and music concerts or rock fests. I don’t listen to her but they sounded so much like kids from my school (even their voices sounded young) although they were probably grandpas. Of course you can enjoy music at any age, but it was funny how much they got into it.

I finally arrived at the metro center where I waited to catch my final bus of the day back to campus. It was a long wait, but it did come and I got on. I even managed to get a seat! From where I was siting, I overheard two guys animatedly talking about physics (there was also a girl with them, listening). Now I don’t know much about physics, but honestly I think they barely understood what they were talking about.

I went straight to my dorm upon getting back and surprised my roommates who didn’t know when I’d be coming back (they were welcoming though and I gave them small gifts), then went to get lunch, returned to take a shower and finally did my laundry. At dinner, I ran into Nicole and she asked to borrow some shorts from me. I agreed and promptly regretted it when she picked out my favorite pair. Worst of all, she though I was giving them to her! I cleared that up with her, but inwardly I started planning a way to get them back...I’m such an awful person, aren’t I?

Anyways, now it’s Sunday. I’ll write more about today later, when something happens. I still have work left to catch up on!

[lunulate]

I know, it’s Sunday, but this was one of the worst weeks I remember having in a long while. I don’t know whether it was because of Halloween or my period, but I had a run of some insane bad luck. 

The main thing, of course, was Lovelyz disbanding. I knew it was coming but I still can’t believe it. I’ve been a fan for six years and for them to part ways without even releasing a last album really hurts, especially when I know they’ve recorded a lot of material. I don’t blame any of the members though, just the company. I still love the girls and will continue to support them, but there’s such a heavy weight in my heart. I’ve been so depressed since their disbandment was announced though, I couldn’t bring myself to update my music blog or read the news.

Besides from that, I started having more nightmares, feeling sorta sick (light-headed), and finding mysterious rips and stains on my clothes. And I got a bad grade on a big assignment. At one point I thought I was cursed.

On the bright side, my last midterm wasn’t as bad as I thought (I’m still worried about how I did though) and volunteering went okay. We got to bird-watch, which was nice. There’s no volunteering next week though because of Veterans’ Day, and I’ll be back home anyway. I need to figure out a way to get to the airport, I’m pretty worried about that...

Also, I've started planning my courses for next quarter. It’s so hard to make all my classes fit, I’m afraid I’ll have to take either a very early morning class or a very late night one. But I really want to graduate this summer so I’ll do what I must.

The problem about writing these entries on weekends is that I always forget what happened earlier in the week. Although considering the events of this one, maybe that’s actually a good thing. Anyways, I was really was going to post yesterday but movie night started (and ended) later than usual. We watched all ten episodes of “Over the Garden Wall” which sounds like a lot, but each were about ten minutes long. A lot of people came, but they had leave in the middle.

Although the episodes were fairly short, it did amount to almost two hours so I was ready to call it a night. However, what we did instead was stayed in the lounge and listened to anime OPs for over an hour. I felt so old, I knew about but never watched most of the anime they talked about. It seemed like they watched every moderately popular anime in the past seven years or so, and a few even older. At one point they started playing Kyary Pamyu Pamyu and Twice. I was so tired by the time it was all over.

[lunulate]

What a tiring week. I had two midterms (hopefully they went well) and Mom came to visit on Wednesday (my aunt couldn’t come). She brought a lot of snacks, my Halloween costume, and new shoes. I was especially grateful for the latter because my spare shoes are actually too small for me and I've had a persistent blister above my right heel—lt wasn’t so bad at first, but now it’s gotten to very painful and bloody. 

She also did my laundry, and told me all about how ông and bà are recuperating in a nursing home (ông is learning to walk again and bà’s entire left side is weak). I think I forgot to mention this, but Mom broke her ankle while in Iceland and it hasn’t healed yet. It’s strange how we’re all having issues with our feet (I think bà is?) although mine is pretty minor. Mom also told me she was trying to book tickets for my flight back—I’m going home for Veterans’ Day weekend! It seems kinda redundant because Thanksgiving is only two weeks after, but I’m still excited. After she left, my roommates made cinnamon rolls and gave me one. 

My Thursday class was cancelled because the professor got sick, so I went back and discovered my period started. I still had to come back to the satellite campus for volunteering. I think it went better than last time, but we took turns learning to measure wells and I messed up, it was so embarrassing. What’s worse is that I had to teach the next volunteer (and actually even the one after that), and of course I wasn’t of much help. I ran into Genesis and Jace on both Wednesday and Thursday.

On Friday (yesterday), I started studying for my final midterm, called my sisters up, and attended a Halloween event with a girl from my residential hall named Amanda. It was a murder mystery, and we had to figure out who killed our school mascot based on a schedule, autopsy, and testimonies. It was fun but more simple than we thought. We both chose the same suspect, and after we submitted our guesses, we were told that the answer would be revealed later. I checked today and guess what? We were right! 

The entirety of today was pretty much spent taking a shower and doing laundry. It took so long because I had to wait for the stalls to empty up and well, laundry always takes a while. I didn’t get any schoolwork done... One of my roommates’ boyfriend came to visit and we were all supposed to attend movie night, but only Luis and Amanda showed up, probably because it was Halloween weekend and people had plans.

We originally planned to watch “Train to Busan” but Amanda told us that another residential college was screening “Spirited Away” in their dining hall, and after a lot of indecision, we decided to go there instead. I was a little sorry because while I didn’t really want to watch “Train to Busan,” the other residential college was pretty far away. 

But I couldn’t say no, so the six of us hopped on a night bus to that residential college. We got there early to make sure we got seats, so I flipped through a few periodicals while we waited in the mailroom. Finally it was time to go in. We got free candy and hot chocolate, which was nice, and then we all seated ourselves at a table (except for Amanda, who ran into some of her friends) and settled in to watch the movie.

I’d never watched “Spirited Away” before (although I have seen a few Ghibli films) and I wasn’t crazy about watching the dubbed version, but it went okay. I won’t spoil it in case you haven’t watched it, but there were times the plot was confusing—it made leaps I couldn’t follow and felt slightly sped up. I’m sure I missed some context due to translation issues/not growing up in Japan. But it was very sweet and sad, I felt melancholic after watching it.

The movie ended sort of late so we had to run to make the bus. We literally all sprinted as soon as we saw it, thankfully the bus driver waited for us. I even heard someone remark, “Oh they made the bus” or something to that effect as we got on. However, we left Amanda. I guess we all thought she was planning to stay with her friends but shortly after we left, one of my roommates got a text from her asking where we were. We felt so bad.

Now we’re back, and it’s very late. I didn’t do any homework although I have a big assignment due on Monday and I didn’t get to call anyone although I really wanted to. I don’t know. I don’t regret watching the movie but now I feel sorta empty inside. Tomorrow is Halloween—maybe I’ll go trick-or-treating? Mom brought my PB&J costume when she visited.

Other things I’ve been up to: I recently developed a craving for everything bagels with cream cheese (I liked them before but not at this level) and I’ve been trying to find our school mascot in designs everywhere. Our mascot is very popular so they’re incorporated in various logos, signs, etc. often in innovative ways. I feel worried about the midterms I took so far, I think I did fine but I really need As.

[lunulate]

Sorry I didn’t write yesterday, I’ve been studying like mad this weekend for my two midterms next week. Thankfully I don’t have one tomorrow, but I have an exam each on Tuesday and Wednesday. My mom and aunt are actually going to visit me on Wednesday, but they’re not staying for long. Maybe I can get them to do my laundry...anyways a lot has happened since last week. The second night of the Silent Disco wasn’t as fun because the DJs played mostly slower music, which I find very hard to dance to. Genesis came with me again though, and I still danced my heart out. I kinda regret it because for almost a week after I could barely walk, my calves hurt so much. I looked really silly walking slowly and scarcely bending my knees! I had an epiphany about the color of my soul and found out it’s a turquoise/teal blue color. And I talked to Lena again last Sunday and came away with mixed feelings (the color of her soul is green).

Actually this week gave me mixed feelings overall. I had two important assignments due (one was the field notebooks which I worked on all the way before the submission time), I’ve been reading less, and I had nightmares for two nights in a row. One of my roommates has been sick and my aunt sent me a package on Wednesday, containing winter clothes, laundry detergent (somehow I already ran out), and sweets. I embarrassed myself Thursday while volunteering at the nature reserve again (don’t ask, I don’t want to think about it) but hey, at least I got free gloves for planting! One of my roommates went home for the weekend, she came back today and gave me a shirt and our other roommate a skirt. It was really so sweet of her, she gave me a mask before too. 

I watched an old Scooby-Doo episode with my sisters over Google Hangouts on Friday and it turns out that my computer mic does work...but only on Google Hangouts? It never works when I’m on Zoom. Saturday was another off-day. My youngest sister texted to say bà ngoại had suffered another stroke. She seems okay now, but I’m worried for her.

We also had movie night yesterday but only one person showed up—we watched “Jennifer’s Body.” I enjoyed it but I had to look away at the bloodier parts. While setting up for the movie, we bumped into the guy who practically lives in the lounge. I’m not kidding—every time one of us goes to the lounge, he’s always there. And even when he’s not, he leaves his stuff in the lounge: pillow, guitar, desk lamp, etc. His room is across from the lounge and its door is usually slightly open. My roommates took a peek in once and apparently the floor is covered by a huge mattress. His entire room is essentially a giant bed. 

I’m not sure what we’re watching next for Halloween weekend but earlier this week a girl on our floor stopped by to request Train to Busan or a zombie movie. We ended up watching “Jennifer’s Body,” I hope we didn’t hurt her feelings because she didn’t show. 

Today was really rainy, so I only stepped out for breakfast and to study in the library with a girl in my one of my classes named Michelle. She was really nice and even booked a study room for us, but after three hours of studying my brain was fried. Then I took a shower, ate leftovers for late lunch and instant ramen for dinner, and took more notes. I also made phone calls and listened to music out loud because my roommates were gone for most of the day. The rain was very strong, at one point the power went out for 10-15 minutes. Right now I’m really worried because my period is going to start soon. Also, about my midterms.

P.S. I didn’t write about this last time, but I’m still upset over the rumors that Lovelyz is disbanding. Can’t say I didn’t see this coming if that’s truly the case, but I’m still holding out hope.

[lunulate]

Trust me, I am not going to turn this into a daily blog (I want to but I don’t think I could keep it up) but I had to write this down. My roommates left for their weekend trip, so I sang my heart out and closed the window (slightly). I even had one long-ish phone call, but sadly I barely got any work done. And then in the evening I went to the Silent Disco with Genesis and her friend Jace. We all got our headphones and made our way down...at first people were shy so we just stood there tapping our feet and bopping our heads. Then the crowd slowly moved down even further (we were in an outdoor amphitheater) and we followed. Then everyone began to dance. 

And I don’t know what happened to me. I started dancing like crazy. Really cautiously at first, but I quickly lost all inhibitions and danced like my life depended on it, which is actually how I dance when I’m alone. For the next two hours, I barely stopped moving, even though I dropped my phone at one point and had to take off my jackets at another. It was wild. I kept flipping through the channels (there were three live DJs playing different genres of music) trying to find a song to dance to. I felt embarrassed the whole time but I couldn’t stop. I was really disappointed when the event ended but my feet were really about to fall off. And then a really strange thing happened.

A guy came up to me and told me he loved my “vibes” and could he have my number? I was both flattered and freaked out (mostly the latter) but I ended up giving him my number, which I regret. Because it turns out he’s a computer science grad student who lives off-campus. And he’s four years older than me! Thankfully Genesis and Jace came to my rescue at that point and he asked for their numbers as well. But he also asked if we smoke or drank and if we would like to come his house by the beach for a dance party sometime which set off alarm bells in my head. He also introduced us to one of his friends. I don’t know what to think. He seems to really love dancing (he was on an amateur dance team while an undergrad here) so it was cool that he complimented me on my dance moves. But I wish it stopped there. I’m going to the Silent Disco again tomorrow, but Genesis and Jace are busy. I hope I’ll be alright...I wish I could find someone to go with.

P.S. I checked my phone, and I danced almost six miles in those two hours...even though I pretty much stayed in one spot. That’s nuts!

[lunulate]

I know, it’s Thursday! It seems like every week, I’m writing a day earlier. But if I don’t write it all out now, I’ll burst. So many things happened this week, and we’re only halfway through. On Monday, I talked to one of my professors about the field notebook and came out feeling a little better and with an idea. On Tuesday I went out to look at the wild turkeys with Genesis. Unfortunately, she walked very loudly and often scared them, but she did tell me about a Silent Disco the school was holding that I ended up RVSPing for, and we spotted three deer. 

While we were following two turkeys around, a guy came up to us and offered us some cookies...I was tempted but Genesis said no. Afterwards she lectured me about not taking food from strangers and what if there was weed in it? But I saw the same guy at breakfast today and surprised him by grabbing his shoulder. From the way he was standing in front of the pastries, I think he’s just a fan of sweets. The Wi-Fi wasn’t working in the dorms on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I used it as an excuse to read more books—mostly plays and poetry collections. I also lost my hat Wednesday (I left it in the dining hall), and when I came in the next morning to find it, one of the girls working told me that they kept it for me and she always remembered me wearing my hat!

And that brings us to today, Thursday. It’s Katherine Mansfield’s birthday; I’m not sure I can say she’s one of my favorite authors (yet) but I love her writing style. I volunteered again at the nature reserve today, except that I got the locations mixed-up (apparently they were changed yesterday night) and went to the main campus instead of the satellite one. Well, I just joined the main campus group because I was already there anyway. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed waiting for them to come up and find me, but three people complimented me on my hat though so that made up for it. 

Once we got everything sorted, I went with a group leader and another volunteer named Charlie to several of the university’s rooftop greenhouses. They were really cool, but the plants were pretty heavy. They’re native species intended for transplanting at the nature reserve. We took them out, stacked them, put them on carts, and loaded them up into a truck. Then we took a tour of more greenhouses and a rooftop garden where anyone can come and study. It was so beautiful. Then we got into the truck and went down to the satellite campus to drop off the trays. Charlie and I regrouped with the other volunteers (including a girl I didn’t meet the first time named Ashley) who were just finishing mulching(?) and helped them put their tools away and then we went birding. 

I’ve never really used binoculars before but I learned pretty quickly and I like them a lot. We only saw three different bird species, but we also saw two deer and sadly a wasp killing a very colorful moth (Charlie looked it up and found out it was a painted tiger moth). We all stopped for a while to watch, Ashley in particular really wanted the moth for her Entomology project. Eventually the wasp flew off, and Ashley tried to pick up the dying moth. I gave her a napkin I took from the dining hall to hold the moth with and then we all went back, because our group leader had a meeting and we had a bus to catch. 

Afterwards I took a shower, worried about classes some more (midterms are coming up!) and read more. My roommates are going on a trip this weekend so I’ll be alone in the dorm. I’ll miss them, but I’m really excited too—I’m planning on attending the Silent Disco, catching up on work, singing my heart out, and holding long phone calls in our room. What I’m looking forward to most of all is closing the window; we always keep it open because my roommate requires the cold to sleep. I do too, but it’s getting very cold.

[lunulate]

It’s a Friday, not a Saturday, and I’m writing! Thank God for small miracles. Classes were pretty stressful again (especially with the field notebook assignment) but I managed to steal a couple of chocolate muffins at breakfast throughout the week so it wasn’t so bad. Unfortunately they’re not available every day...I generally hate muffins with a passion but chocolate muffins are okay because they’re like cupcakes. Basically dessert. 

A couple of things of note—I got mixed up about the location of a discussion section and ended up missing it (thankfully I could make it up) and I spent a lot of time working with my ocean deoxygenation group for a class. I also managed to go through two of Donald Justice’s poetry collections and a couple of Ibsen plays I haven’t read before. 

Yesterday I volunteered at one of my school’s nature reserves. I don’t know what possessed me to do it; I guess I really wanted to help out in some way and saw a flier and so ended up going. It was so awkward though, I had no idea where we were supposed to meet up and when I got there I was so shy I could barely speak with the other students and our team leader. We ended up doing a lot of weeding with long shovels which was great except I had never done it before. I think I eventually got the hang of it, but not before I broke both the heels of my shoes.

I actually didn’t mind the work, although it was nearly three hours of hard work in the hot sun with the wind blowing away my hat, I just felt so out of place among the other students who were actually interning for a class. I already promised to go next week though, let’s just hope I don’t also break the heels off my spare shoes. They’re the only other pair I’ve got.

I didn’t have class today, so I tried to repair my shoes with some glue one of my roommates kindly lent to me. It didn’t work, but my other roommate grabbed cookies for me from the dining hall so I wasn’t very sad. I spent most of the day in my dorm room trying and failing to get work done. 

One of the girls on my floor named Genesis asked me to walk with her. I always run into her in the bathroom and my roommates and I have actually invited her over before, so we went out and talked about our lives and writing (she’s a literature major and like me, a transfer student). Afterwards she invited me for tea later at night. I took a shower, did some homework, chased wild turkeys again, then came back for tea. It was very nice, Genesis offered me some tea biscuits and played jazz music softly while we sipped away. We had lemon ginger tea. Then I went to get dinner; unfortunately, they ran out of dessert and ranch dressing. I’m often too late for the former (just my luck!) but I did manage to get a slice of strawberry cake earlier this week. 

 My roommates had plans for dinner, so I FaceTimed my cats and family in my dorm room (usually I can’t but my roommates were out so...). I watched NHK programs while clipping my nails and sang for a bit (I’m trying to listen to NPR and watch PBS too), now I’m writing this while listening to music. I really should do my homework but I’m getting sleepy. Tomorrow is movie night—we’re watching another horror movie. I hope I can handle it. Maybe I’ll write then...

Also, I forgot to mention this but last Sunday, i hiked with my roommates, Aster and his dog, Annabelle, and Luis to a nature reserve next to our school (not the one I volunteered at). We visited a fish pond, rock garden (where we build our own tower among the other ones), and a meadow. A few people smoked there which...yeah. I talked with Lena (I’ll tell you about her later) for hours that night and had a bizarre, melancholic dream afterwards. 

[lunulate]

I guess Saturdays are my writing days now. Honestly I didn’t plan for them to be, I really wanted to post more often but it seems I only have time to on weekends. Well, a lot of things have happened (as they always) and I’m sure I forgot some of them. I’ll try to put down as much as I remember though. I went to more classes this week and felt intimidated by all of them. I did meet a lot of nice people though (one girl complimented me on my large eyes!) and I sorta started a debate about a study in one discussion session. But there’s so much homework for me to do, even as I sit here doing this...I’m particularly worried about a research proposal I have to develop for a class based on field observations(?). 

I’m not exactly sure, but I had the idea to study the wild turkeys on campus. Yesterday I decided to follow a group of them after randomly running into them. My objective was to find out where they roost at night, which is actually a genuine mystery; I don’t think anyone really knows where they do. I ran after them for an hour before they finally decided to fly into some trees right at sunset. It was exhausting chasing after them (they’re fast birds!) and I might have run into some poison oak in my haste...fingers crossed that I didn’t because it’s been a day and I haven’t shown any signs yet. 

I was prepared to call it a day right then and there, but my roommates invited me to another night hike—a spooky one this time—so I ended up walking eight miles that day. It wasn’t spooky at all, Aster and his ex-boyfriend was there (but not his dog), my roommates introduced me to a girl named Annabelle(?) and she introduced us to her roommates (we visited their apartment after the hike), we got invited to a pirate party on our way to the event and actually encountered it (or another party) in the woods while we were hiking, and then we went back. It was a wacky night and we didn’t get back until almost midnight.

The following morning (this morning actually), my roommates, Aster and his dog, Annabelle, Luis, and I went down to a nature reserve next to our school to see a koi pond. We also visited a rock garden (where we made a rock tower) and a meadow (where Aster, Annabelle, and one of my roommates smoked). It was a very long hike. I probably wouldn’t have gone (especially after all that walking the night before), but my roommates really wanted to go. I still can’t believe the amount of energy they have.

After we got back, I ate lunch, took a shower, and did my laundry for the first time. I know, I know, how could I have not done it before? Well, let’s just say I’m filthy and lazy. The laundry room was packed because it was a weekend, so I called dad to wish him a happy birthday while waiting for a machine to open up. And afterwards when it was all over I found myself with someone’s sheet and pillowcases...either someone stuck them in with my clothes or forgot to take them out of the dryer before I put my stuff in. I was kinda pissed because two shirts and a sock got stuck in the sheet and didn’t dry properly. I didn’t have time to dry them again, so I just left the sheet and pillowcases at the laundry room and put the wet clothes out to air-dry. 

After doing the laundry, I ate dinner in a hurry because I wanted to follow the wild turkeys again today but I got there too late and couldn’t see anything. Wild turkeys don’t always roost in the same place either so it could be that they weren’t there at all. I was so disappointed. Anyways, I had to rush because my roommates were hosting another movie night (it did become a weekly thing after all); we watched “Scream.” 

A lot of people showed up, including Luis who actually rented the movie for us and brought snacks again. Honestly I really can’t stand horror films (I was apprehensive about going on that spooky night hike that didn’t turn out scary after all) but I couldn’t scream much with the amount of people in the lounge. It helped that things were slightly blurry for me because I didn’t wear my glasses. But my roommates are planning a horror movie marathon all October for Halloween...not sure how much I can handle. They and Luis headed to a party out in the nature reserve we were at today after “Scream” ended and we cleaned the lounge while I decided to stay in. I called my sisters, saw my family and cats briefly. And now I’m writing this :)

[lunulate]

Haven’t written for a while but my first day of class was okay, I got heart palpitations that morning worrying I’d miss the bus, which I didn’t. I finished two books at our residential college library and also called ông nội to wish him a happy birthday. 

I didn’t have anything planned for the weekend at first, other than a COVID-19 check-up mandated by the school and the movie night, but my roommates invited me everywhere. Yesterday we went downtown for a school event with Luis where we got coupons for free food. I went back a bit early, but we met later for dinner where I met one of the girls I ate with on Wednesday, Hannah. It turns out that she works at the dining hall and she gave me some tips if I ever wanted to apply. Unfortunately she missed out on the downtown event so I promised to give her my free ice cream coupon. Afterwards, my roommates, Luis, and I raced to catch a concert at one of the other residential colleges. We got there late, but just in time to see the last band perform. My roommates really liked them (even rushed into an impromptu mosh pit) but I couldn’t understand what the frontman was singing. And it wasn’t because some of the songs were in Spanish, he was mumbling the lyrics. I’m no vocal expert, but it seems like he was singing in his throat and very chesty.

Today we went to a social event our residential college was holding with our sister college. I unexpectedly won a raffle there and got a blanket and two face masks. I don’t use face masks so I gave it to a sophomore we met there named Aster (he majors in literature and actually lives at our hall) but I kept the blanket. It’s unfortunately a polyester one, but I was really happy. I’ve never won anything in my life from something like this...it’s rare that I’m so lucky. 

Afterwards, we walked to a shrine dedicated to our school’s mascot along with Aster, his dog, and his boyfriend. We walked for like twenty minutes uphill because we forgot the campus buses don’t run on weekends. It turns out the shrine was located on the balcony of three guys’ dorm room. We had to get access to their building and then go through their room to get there. The guy who let us in was really nice (I think his name was Dave?) and he explained to us how the shrine came to be. 

Apparently one of his roommates bought a mascot plushie and a rug and placed them both out on the balcony (the plushie on the rug), which is located right next to the elevator and visible to everyone on the floor. People started asking to visit so the guys headed downtown to buy crystals and make it as shrine. I might be getting parts of the story mixed up, but yeah anyways now people come by to take pictures and leave “offerings.” My roommates and I each left one, for me it was a postcard I decorated at a social event...it’s a little sad but I had no one else to send it to so I thought I’d just give it to our mascot.

Then we had a movie night whereupon we watched Pride & Prejudice in our residential hall lounge which was honestly just okay. I didn’t like the original novel in the first place but the film actually changed a few things which I felt made the plot even more nonsensical and magnified its flaws. But it’s one of my roommates’ favorite movies, and I wasn’t about to air my negative thoughts anyway. I forgot to say, but the movie night was actually a social event held by my roommates and a few people actually did come including two friends we invited—Luis and Lonnie. It seems everyone enjoyed themselves though (I feel guilty for eating so many of the snacks Luis and one of my roommates brought) and there was even talk about making movie night a weekly thing.

Because Lonnie has to hike all the way back to a distant parking lot to get to her car, we all walked with her there after the movie ended. And by we, I mean my roommates, Luis, myself and a girl we met at the movie night named Gabi(?). Not sure if that’s how her name is spelled but she kept playing music as we strode along. It was a really long and tiring walk, but I’m glad Lonnie got to her car safe. Then we all went back through a different route—Gabi was an orientation guide and said she knew a few shortcuts. We stopped to play on a carousel she pointed out and crossed over two bridges but we finally got back. I stayed behind to call mom (she made me promise to every Saturday) and write this post while the others continued along to a party Luis’s roommates told him about. The party is about a twenty-minute walk away, and it’s already pretty late so I’m a little worried for them...I’m realizing how I much I walk with them. I’d probably only walk a third of what I do if it weren’t for them. Honestly, it’s so sweet of them to try and include me in everything but they want to go to nearly every social event and I’m not sure I can keep up.

[lunulate]

The app I was using for the dining hall because I don’t have my ID card yet malfunctioned so I skipped breakfast. I took the bus down to the satellite campus and got lost, but also got to explore the area. Mom texted me to say ông ngoại’s surgery went okay. I spent a strange lunch with two girls I didn’t know because I accidentally got too much food. I got lost trying to find my college’s main library and when I got there, I was told I couldn’t check out anything without my ID card. It was so hard finding books I wanted to read there that I wanted to cry, so instead I went to the small library in my residential college and read Show Boat by Edna Ferber in one day. The line for dinner took so long that I barely got to eat. I called my aunt and FaceTimed my cats again. I really miss them. Now I’m preparing to go to bed early for my first day of school tomorrow. I walked nearly five miles today.

[lunulate]

What a day. Class still hasn’t started yet so I spent the day preparing by practicing a morning run-through (kinda failed that since I just barely missed the bus, but I wasn’t planning on getting on anyway), attending a mandatory online orientation for my major, and going to in-person transfer advising. 

For the last one, I actually took the campus bus (as opposed to the one that will take me to the satellite campus for classes) for the first time ever which was kinda scary, but also easy. Problem was that I got off at the wrong stop and got lost trying to look for the transfer advising place. Luckily I met a nice sophomore named Oscar who helped me get to around the right place. He’s a sophomore majoring in computer science who lives off campus. Apparently he wanted to explore some caves. 

It was humiliating because I had actually gotten close-ish to it at some point, I just made a wrong turn and ended up walking farther away. I got lost again once he left but I eventually made it! And then almost went down a different path because I forgot my way back. It took forever so I had to skip lunch.

Today is Tết Trung Thu so the moon was really big. I forgot to take a picture, but it’s too late now. I went up to my residential hall’s lounge (thankfully it was empty) and called up my family because my ông ngoại is getting surgery tomorrow...I’m really worried for him. I had to call my mom for his number because the one I had didn’t work. He didn’t pick up but my bà ngoại did and she essentially said she’d pass on my message to him. 

Then I called my aunt, bà nội, and ông nội. I don’t know why but I started to tear up as soon as I heard ông nội’s voice. I had been feeling homesick but at that point I wanted to full-on cry...I couldn’t though because I had to FaceTime my cats. They didn’t seem to get it, and understandably kept squirming away from the phone my aunt shoved in their faces. Still, seeing them, the inside of the house, and my family made me so homesick. Afterwards I called my sisters and we talked for a bit about random things.

I eventually had to go though because my roommates invited me on a night hike our residential college was hosting. They had asked me out earlier to a different eve but I couldn’t go, so I agreed to go with them this time. Technically the event was for just sophomores but oh well! It’s not my first time going to one because I just tag along with my roommates. They’re both so social (although one is a self-proclaimed introvert?) that we leave our dorm room door open so people can stop by to chat, although no one has so far. They made a new friend today named Luis and have been hanging out with him all day, and they already planned a movie night for our entire residential hall! I’m grateful they try to include me in their plans, but truthfully I’m still trying to take it all in.

Anyway, turns out the night hike was up a hill and nearly two hours long total. My feet were killing me and there was a scary moment when two students went missing...I’m not sure if they were found actually, people were speculating that they turned back. The whole thing felt like a horror movie to be honest (and I could never stand those); for a moment I thought we were going to get killed!

I did meet a nice girl named Lonnie though (not sure if that’s how her name is spelled) who like Oscar, is a sophomore living off-campus, although she double majors in film and literature. She has to walk all the way from here to a parking lot near the transfer advising place every day, which is just crazy! I had to take a bus for that and still had to walk some. Maybe because I got off at the wrong stop...

All in all I walked over six miles today (according to the health app on my phone), which is a lot for someone who was averaging (much) less than 0.5 miles before. Actually I walked more than four miles yesterday because I got lost (are you surprised?) and about three miles the day before that. Everything on this campus is so far apart, they really make you work for it!

[lunulate]

It’s been over a week since I last wrote, and so many things have happened since then. I moved into college a few days ago and am currently settled in at my dorm! Both my roommates are very sweet, for which I’m very grateful...because the last ten days have been super draining. Let’s just say it involved family, flights, and my own forgetfulness. 

To be honest, my experience moving into college was not as bad as I thought it’d be. But the fear still hasn’t been entirely abated. My roommates are indeed nice, but I also know I’m not an easy person to live with. School hasn’t started yet (it will soon), but all my classes are held at a satellite campus far way. I’ll have to take a half-hour trip by bus every day to get there and what if I miss it? This bus goes along a special route and only comes once an hour. All my classes seem difficult, and I could only find an e-book rental for one when the professor indicated a preference for hard copies.

And worst of all, the homesickness. I was caught by such a bad wave of it the day I moved in. I miss my sisters, my grandparents (both sets), my cats, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, even my parents. I’m scared for them too. My ông ngoại has to undergo surgery in two days and I wish I could be there for him. One of my cats requires medicine twice daily and I always give it to him...we’re very attached to each other but I won’t be home for months. My aunt says already he keeps looking for me. My sisters and I have always been very close, but what if the distance causes us to drift apart? And what if something goes horribly wrong and I can’t help because I’m too far away?

Times like these make me wish I had stayed and attended school near my family. Give it a few more days and I might be begging to go back. But I can’t just drop out of school. Actually, I have an uncle who’s going through something similar right now. He went back to school this year to become a dentist and is currently studying in the Midwest...his husband (and their dogs) can’t go with him so he’s all alone there. For four years! Meanwhile, I’m still in-state and will (hopefully) only be here for less than two years. Whenever I want to give up, I think of him and remember someone’s going through the same thing as me (although he definitely has it worse). We didn’t get a chance to talk before he left about a month ago, but I hope he’s doing okay.

[lunulate]

I feel so frustrated, I could cry. Went to get my computer’s battery replaced at Best Buy today and was told that they couldn’t change it because the computer was practically vintage...but it’s only four years old? I’m not mad at the repair guys though, just Apple. I guess that really teaches me a lesson not to buy their products. I made an appointment with the Apple Store anyways on the Best Buy staff’s recommendation. i hope they can fix it before I leave for college, but if not I’m screwed.

Then I went to the bank and held up the line for over half an hour with my problems. I felt so sorry to everyone, especially Mr. Chris who’s been working on my case since last week. In the end, my application kept getting rejected so we settled on a debit card instead, which I didn’t mind (actually I wish we could have just done that in the first place and avoided all the trouble). And then there was the problem of the printer...but I don’t want to think about that right now.

[lunulate]

Really tired. I move in early for university next week and there’s so much I have to do before then. I got a call from the bank yesterday saying there’s been an error with my credit card application so I have to come in...I don’t even want one but I need it for school. I’ve been needing to get my computer battery replaced for years so I made an appointment for that too. Met up with two friends separately to catch up before I leave (I wish I could have met with the others but our schedules conflicted) which was fun but draining. Cleaned my room, updated my vaccination records, got a printer...

Unfortunately, my uncles (and their dogs) are out of town so I won’t be able to see them before I go, but I still have to check up on my grandparents and cats. Another uncle owes me a reusable water bottle, I have to pay for classes (and get books for those classes), I also need to buy some last-minute things, get my flu shot, and of course, contact my roommates. I feel exhausted and school hasn’t even started yet!

[lunulate]

I could never keep a diary, although I’ve made numerous attempts over the years in various journals. I’d write about half-way and then either lose interest or the notebook itself; most of the time I’d just forget. 

I’ve always regretted that—every time I look back at my old entries, I wish I had written more. I’ve run a music blog for over five years (which is the only thing I’ve been able to do somewhat consistently) so I know how rewarding it is to have a record of something to hold onto. 

Like songs I would’ve forgotten otherwise, songs I used to love but don’t listen to as much anymore, songs that have specific memories attached to them. Stuff like that.

There's a lot of things I wish I could remember about my younger self. So although it’s a bit late, I’m starting this blog to jot down my thoughts!