luvished

[luvished]

“ i do hope this spiked tea possesses some truly magical abilities, as i find myself in desperate need of them.” lips curled with amusement, and for a split moment she’d forgotten why she’d been even in need of hiding from anyone. sitting down in a dramatic motion, sinking in, a sigh escaped her with the acceptance of utter defeat. accepting that she cannot remain in the shadows forever. “ does it help you ?” cecilia asked, glancing up “ when you try to keep your mind off ‘things’. ” she gestured vaguely , wishing that her family’s scandals could be reduced to nothing more but a thing. something easily dismissed. “ what do you do when distraction is necessary ? aside from drinking tea, of course.” 

richard had always tried to be close to his family whenever he could, although there had been times when they'd give him a raging headache due to their differing beliefs. due to this, it wasn't often that he had bumped into one of his family members, but when he did, he made sure to make the most of it. letting out a small chuckle at his cousin's words, he looked up at her. "might i offer some spiked tea in exchange? it might be able to help keep your mind off of things a bit."

[luvished]

another issue of lady whistledown had been thrust upon them. again, her family name was as easily scattered as their feelings. disregarded in any way. when she read the paper, she’d expected to see familiar names. the names of her family, her own and those she held dear. yet, reading william’s name struck her with the same jolt of disbelief she had felt when she first saw her mother’s. and just as before, she knew this feeling would stick.  expecting that he’d probably be at the stables, cecilia barely allowed her nerves to calm and she found herself pushing through a crowd. rushing with the realisation that she didn’t know what to stay. still, when she finally stood in front of the stable door, she couldn’t help but knock. the urgency fuelling the strength of it. “ pardon me , but …” but any kind of an attempt at an explanation was cut short by william’s  muffled voice behind the door and she knocked again, firmer this time, hoping that she would not be forced to speak to a closed door. when the door opened, her lips parted only to close again. waiting for his anger to subside, she hesitated, momentarily forgetting that she had come with words to offer. but now she was quietly searching for the right words in a pool of nothing. “ i only wished to see if you were well.” she murmured, blinking, her usual eloquence seemingly lost. “ i  suspected you might not be, but …” a pause. “we may speak tomorrow… or not at all, of course.”

open starter at the sinclair estate, after Lady Whistledown's reveal

Finally, for the first time in recent weeks, William felt that things were back on track. He was one again professionally respected, his work admired by all in the trade, and his position in the Sinclair household was one he was proud of. All was well until a servant had pushed a copy of Lady Whistledown into his hands. William’s stomach churned as the words danced across the pages of Whistledown, each sentence cutting deeper than the last. There, written in the cold ink, lay the details of his heart, of his offer of marriage that had been a secret shared between the two. His heart sank with the weight of Cassandra’s name being dragged into the mess and whirlwind of gossip, speculation, and judgement. A knock on the stable door came, much to William’s frustration. “I need a moment,” William called out, his eyes never leaving the page, re-reading the passage that had his own name printed. He tried to rationalise this, to think of what he could say. Could he deny the proposal to others that asked to help Cassandra and protect her reputation? Would he be believed? The knock came again, and anger and irritation boiled up within him. “I said I need a minute.” He shouted back, his tone brisk, and he hastily walked to the door. “For God's sake, what is so urgent that you seem to be in a rush for my attention?” He asked the caller, forgetting all manners and politeness.

[luvished]

cecilia knew about the comparison of their families. knew about the whispered rivalries, the insinuations of jealousy, the idle gossip that only served to stoke the flames. yet, as with most things that failed to align with her opinion, she chose to ignore them. at least for now, so long as none of them proved to hold any truth. it was easier that way. to believe that this meeting was nothing more than a pleasant opportunity to make one another’s acquaintance. that, at least, would ease her anxieties.  “ i had no notion that the thorpe family possessed such an expertise in the art of tea-making.” perhaps, she should try it as well. or better yet, persuade her family to partake in the endeavor with her. it certainly would be an amusing family bonding activity. although she wasn’t too sure, how much they’d enjoy plucking flowers for the perfect cup of tea. “  i must see this garden.i am certain it is as lovely as the tea itself.”  she exclaimed, then clearing her throat and taking a bite of the blueberry scone which was offered to her. the earlier anxiety dissolving with the fresh blueberry taste on her tongue. embarrassment and guilt tugged at her heart lightly. assuming that juliet thorpe simply invited her to dig into some gossip had been a great miscalculation. in fact, juliet thorpe was a kind person. after all, she offered her all these delicious delicacies. certainly, a bad person wouldn’t do so. “ I had never considered it in that light.” the chewing slowed, and the urge to take a more thoughtful sip from the cup suddenly slowed her movement. the last time she reflected anything over a cup of tea must have been so long, that she could barely remember it. “ i prefer not to be left alone with my thoughts for too long. ” a quiet laugh followed. light, almost airy, yet unmistakably a shield. “ what is it that you reflect upon? ” she was curious, wanted to know what one was suppose to think about to become a better person. was there, perhaps, a particular kind of thought that led one toward betterment ? yet, was that enough ? solely, allowing thoughts to determine one’s worth . or was it merely an indulgence ? one that did little to change the course of things?  “i cannot imagine there is much about yourself that requires improvement. ” she mused, sincerity flickering behind her words. “  and as for these scones, i daresay they are in no need of improvement either ” the question made her shift in her seat, her gaze flickering for a moment, as though she feared that any true feeling might slip past her composure. of course, she wasn’t fine. but admitting such a thing out loud, was even more difficult than to simply carry it with her silently. “ no, ” cecilia shook her head, as if she needed to convince herself and not juliet. “ i am truly well.” she paused for a moment. “ my mother…  she is the kindest woman i know. she would never do such a thing.  these are merely lies, I will not allow myself to be troubled by them. you believe that as well, do you not, miss thorpe? surely, you do not give credence to lady whistledown?” she pressed. "i agree, and it would be a shame were anyone to miss the opportunity to taste the thorpes’ excellent tea. now i understand why my brother is so fond of visiting." she jested lightly, a trace of warmth in her tone. “ you would like that ?” her expression softened, gaze filled with admiration tinted by disbelief. I should like that very much." a pause, then a quiet confession.  "though I must admit, my brother and i share little in common, and i would hate to disappoint you. but i do believe you to be a most admirable person, and i find that i hold you in even greater esteem now."

Juliet was many things, but ignorant she most certainly wasn't and with the tales of the Sinclair family coming out in Lady Whistledown, she wanted to know what was what. Of course, the Thorpe and Sinclair families were often pinned against one another, the same kind of nobility and whatnot - but Juliet did adore Jasper amongst the lot of them, but hadn't gotten much to know the others. Perhaps it was time to venture out - to see truly what was what and if anything, it was an intelligence gathering over a friendly cup of tea. "You flatter me very so, Miss Cecilia, indeed. I recommend the jasmine mint - the very leaves of it grow here in our garden and I am quite enchanted by the taste." Juliet spoke, nodding at her maids to go ahead and start pouring the tea. "I find tea to be such a lovely time of day - a time for reflection and growth," Juliet paused, taking a blueberry scone on a plate to offer for the young woman.

"And these scones are just a marvel indeed, you must try one. Our chef is quite talented." She smiled, taking a sip of her much needed tea. Juliet listened to the other blonde explain and looked at her, knowingly. "Are you truly, Miss Cecilia? You mustn't worry about your lips being too tight here, my dear. I am as silent and as trusted as you know - I just quite wanted to see how you were faring after such scandal. None of us were immune, I fear." Juliet spoke, quite comfortingly to the young woman.

"Exhaust myself with preparations? No, not at all, my dear Miss Cecilia - I rather love to host for tea, especially for the other ton. It is important we all remain close, support for one another, do you not think so?" Juliet took another sip of her tea, a smile on her face. "You know how I care so dearly in friendship for your brother, Mister Jasper - and I'd like to have a friendship as well, you and I, Miss Cecilia."

[luvished]

“ i agree with you. next time, promise.” she smiled. probably the first sincere smile, after a long time. beatrice’s offer certainly would’ve been the more enjoyable option. perhaps even the one that would’ve been better, considering she really wanted to talk to someone back then. not anyone but someone who she knew wouldn’t judge her. now,  none of that mattered. the troubles that plagued them seemed far graver, and she had no wish to add to them. “ what do you mean? what, pray, drove you to madness over there.” soft brows wiggled and creased her forehead, a spark of curiosity in her eyes igniting the same feeling in her voice. she couldn’t imagine boredom was the culprit. after all, bea was far too exciting, far too dazzling, too interesting that anywhere she’d go, could be boring. “ it makes no sense in the least. it would’ve been far more believable had she written something of that nature about us ? i daresay we would make a great pair.” cecilia teased. the thought of Beatrice and her brother together was not an unwelcome one. knowing that bea would not only be her best friend but become family. but cecilia was content with their friendship. such formalities meant nothing anyway, as she was sure that perhaps in another lifetime, they must’ve been sisters and if not, cecilia would always love her as much as she did love her family. “ you did ? do not tell me you have known this mysterious person for an age and have kept such a secret from me. who are they ? do i know this mysterious person ?” words of excitement flooded her. one question interrupting the other, barely giving bea the time to answer any of them. “ no, i suppose i do not know them. if that were the case, i would’ve spottem them immediately.” 

beatrices biggest fear had been cecilia coming home and things being different between the two of them. though it had become clear, pretty quickly, that they were going to pick up exactly where they had left off and she was more than happy about that. if things had been different with her friend, then she didn't know what she would have done. this was her oldest, her best friend. she was her entire world.

"you should have come to our country home." beatrice whined. "at least then i wouldn't have gone crazy over the summer as well." the summer had been less than boring - though if cecilia had been there, then maybe she wouldn't have found herself in the trouble that she had been in. "i am glad to hear you still love me most, though. the same can be said for me to you." she smiled at the other.

there had been a lot about cecilia and her family in the papers so she couldn't say that she wouldn't blame her if she didn't want to speak about it. beatrice hoped she would, though. she thought that it would make it a little easier. it would cushion the blow when she told her about callum ... but then cecilia continued and her heart fell. how could she tell her now? was the idea of the two of them really that laughable?

"of course you did." beatrice joked along with her friend, "i doubt it would make much sense." though she was lying through her teeth. she had thought of little else other than callum since the ball. but has she made a mistake? would her friend ever support the pair of them? she had no idea.

she chewed on the inside of her cheek for a moment before she spoke again. "i did meet someone, though." maybe if she told cecilia how the man had made her feel, she could broach the subject of it being callum easier. she hoped so, anyway.

[luvished]

cecilia startled lightly at the sound of a familiar voice, turning slowly as an awkward smile crept to her lips. in an effort to find a table, far enough from any stares, she had quite overlooked richard’s presence. ever since lady whistledown’s latest column, she had not quite felt like talking to anyone. and if she did, she preferred to imagine that their words were not merely a means to ignite the ever-hungry flames of gossip surrounding her family. “ that is very kind of you, but i fear what i seek cannot be found here. it seems they do not offer separate rooms for those who would rather hide from the ton altogether. ”

open to everyone

location: gunter's, london, england.

Richard wasn't always able to escape his family or his duties, but whenever he got the chance to, it was no surprise to find him in town. After he had just gotten done at the modiste for a quick touch-up on one of his suits for the next event, he decided to stop by Gunter's for a glass of tea. Putting the tea between his lips, he looked over at the person in front of him, who seemed to be looking for something. "Hello there, do you need help with something by chance? I've got the time if you do."

[luvished]

she knew the consequences that would inevitably bleed into the ink of lady whistledown’s words. and cecilia wondered if the same weight pressed upon the other as it did on her. she was used to simply smiling through whatever she was going through. it was easier. although at times she wished she was able to express her feelings in a more truthful manner. casting off that pretense. but, once lady whistledown had spoken, there was little to be done. “ you have caught me.” she admitted, her tone light, though not entirely insincere. " i was indeed looking at you and admiring your beauty.” she nodded, pretending to be still unaware of the others' irritation. “ i had assumed we were speaking of that unfortunate flower fiasco? but perhaps I have mistaken you for another. ” her eyes averted back to the sky, avoiding the sharpening gaze. usually, such kind of thoughtless trickery worked. this time she could only suspect that it must have been something serious enough, that her words barely did anything to suspel it. “ i do not know what lady whistledown has written of you. ” a lie. one she hoped would offer some comfort. “ so if the ton judges you, i do not. and I shall not ask you to explain yourself ”

edith was sure that the rumours lady whistledown had been spreading would be all over the ton by now. who believed them? was anyone trying to defend her? she figured that she was doomed to be a spinster now. her hopes of getting to the point where she could potentially get her son back were crushed now. and that devastating thought was coming out as anger at the other woman.

"you were most certainly look at me." she shook her head. she wasn't crazy. she had seen her looking - though it seemed like the other was in a world of her own.

edith narrowed her eyes as the other girl continued. because she couldn't really understand what it was that she was even talking about. has she made something up? or did edith imagine the words that had been on the page? " what are you talking about? " she huffed, rolling her eyes.

[luvished]

for a moment cecilia sought confirmation, in her mother’s avoiding gaze, her silence echoing the truth surely as words would have. she didn’t straight up deny it, and cecilia wished to bask in some fleeting naivety that would allow her to accept it as an answer. yet, everything had been a blur. those whispers, never quite reaching her. her mind drowned in a sea of confusion, that she longed for something as steady as clarity. “ i do not need to understand it.” her words struggled through gritted teeth, swallowing as if she wanted to take them back. but she couldn’t.     “ because i never shall. ” she loved her brothers. but as her mother spoke, she wondered if she loved them as much as she did or perhaps if her time away had eroded some vital part of her heart. she was ashamed that she caught herself hesitating. half-lying when she said those words. of course, she never would wish harm upon her family. but what made them better than all those others who died in place of her family ? live with the scars of war . their wealth ? that wealth which now seemed to dwindle anyway, revealing the hollow compassion beneath it.       “ why did you lie to us ?”

It was out of shame that Elisa had been hiding away from her children, she knew that what she'd done was wrong and had put them all in difficult positions. Even Cecelia, not at risk of going to the war herself, was not being impacted. Elisa could only hope that her daughter's suitors would not be put off. One conversation and the Marchioness would be able to assure them that her daughter's dowry would not be touched. But she knew all too well that some, if not most, would not even bother to talk now.

She was silent for a moment at her daughter's words before giving a shaky sigh, putting her book to the side but avoiding her daughter's gaze. "... You'll understand one day, if or when you have children of your own. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you all."

[luvished]

Elle Fanning as Aurora in Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019), dir. Joachim Rønning

[luvished]

status: closed starter @elisasinclair

cecilia sinclair had not thought herself to be immune to lady whistledown’s ( vicious ) quill but she’d thought of her mother that way. to see her name printed in black ink, glaring back at her, had threatened to disassemble her perfectly nonchalant facade, and yet she only allowed the barest crack to scratch it, refusing to read past those few words, her family’s name, before tossing that damning piece of paper away. and still, whispers had a way of delivering the most vicious news into one’s ears, and so, she knew. knew a truth that she simply refused to believe. now, seated stiffly in the drawing room, mind racing and hands clenched in her lap, she could nothing but the weight of a disgraceful truth pressing upon her chest. flinching as the clock struck the hour, raising on unsteady legs, only to sit down again. how long had she been sitting here, waiting? “ mother .” she smiled. practiced, too brittle. her mind faltered. her expression wavered. and yet, she held fast. insisted “ the lies lady whistledown has written, surely it is untrue, is it not ? you did not buy their safety while other men marched to their deaths. you would never do such a thing.”

[luvished]

an invitation for tea, such a mundane thing that she’d always be part of suddenly detached itself with the recent scandal. and now she needed to face it. when juliet thorpe requested a meeting, cecilia could not help but wonder whether the lady sought conversation with her or about her—about her family, her name, the whispers that had trailed her since her return. until now, she had chosen to ignore such talk, declining most invitations under the guise of requiring rest after her travels. yet time was relentless and it passed. it would wear away at the fabric of her excuse, leaving her with no choice but to face the inevitable.upon entering the dining room, she painted a light smile upon her lips—one that had once come effortlessly but now felt strangely weighty. “ it’s beautiful. i shall have whatever tea you recommend. i trust entirely in your exquisite taste. ” she marvelled, for a moment forgetting forced courtesy and her earlier anxiety. "ah, you flatter me," she continued, her tone light yet sincere. "but I am well aware that it is you whom society so often speaks of in admiration. and indeed, they speak the truth." juliet thorpe was known for her looks, and she did not need false flattery to make it true. however, all she did was speak the truth, and cecilia was never one to hold back compliments if she really meant it. “i am faring well," she answered at last, keeping her reply deliberately short. it was the safest course to steer the conversation away from her family entirely.“ of course. ” an awkward laugh and a lie escaped her, or at least partly. if she didn’t think about the scandal, she was doing pretty well. still, she needed to be careful, shifting in her seat she took a sip, looking at juliet. “ and what of you ? how have you been faring. i trust you have not exhausted yourself with these wonderful preparations."

location: thorpe dining room closed starter for @luvished (this was in my drafts foreverrrr and i literally could not find it)

There was nothing more than Juliet loved to do than to put on a high tea, even if it were just for two people, like today. She adored having it, the presentation, the grandness of it all - it was a tradition she took a lot of pride in. Her governesses had always complimented her on her attention to detail and when it came to detail - no one was more poised than Miss Juliet Thorpe. Having Miss Cecilia over, a Sinclair to say the least - it was all part of a careful detail plan to gather as much intel as she could on scandals. Why not? The Sinclairs were the center of such fraught scandal and Juliet wanted to know more - as she always wanted to. When her maids had told her Miss Cecilia had arrived, Juliet smiled, her warm, engaging smile as the lady entered.

"Miss Cecilia Sinclair. Aren't you just the sight for sore eyes, my lady? Please, come in, and welcome to the Thorpe household. We have all of the fixings for tea - whatever you fancy. Please, do be seated." Juliet smiled, bowing kindly to her before being seated herself. "How are you faring, Miss Cecilia?"

[luvished]

Lady Sybil Crawley in season 1 of Downton Abbey

“I’ll never give up, nor will you. Things are changing for women.”

[luvished]

Keeping this quote to my grave

[luvished]

cecilia turned around but her smile fought against a breaking heart. the voice that called to her had haunted her dreams, and for a moment, all she could do was look upon him—as though none of this were. as though she still walked in that dream where nothing had changed. but time had eroded her, and she wanted to find something untouched by its passing. so, her gaze sought his, searching for the same warm eyes, she was unable to meet when she decided to leave him. “ ki-” memories pressed against her throat, but guilt pushed through it. she longed for the familiarity of his name to fall from her lips as it once had. to bask in the comfort of familiarity. but that was a luxury she no longer deserved. “ my lord.”   the words, though foreign, escaped her with practiced grace. dipping into a careful curtsy, her voice feigning lightness and masking her true feelings.  “ indeed, it has been quite some time.” too long. and yet, not long enough to forget kit —nor the affections that still clung to her like a never ending melody. she could leave. spare herself from the pain from knowing more and allow her feelings to rest. but her expression softened, melting the stiffness from earlier ago, and she continued to speak, as if time hadn’t passed between them. “ i had not thought to encounter you here this evening. ” had cecilia known, would she have come? she wished to believe she would not. that she had moved on, as she was supposed to. but her beating heart betrayed her. “i -” i’m sorry. the words clung to the back of her throat, the apology she had carried for so long. the one she had wished to give him a hundred times over.  instead cecilia exhaled. “ the years have carried us far, it seems. i hope they have been gentle with you …  i confess I have heard much in passing.” or perhaps she’d asked about him. despite … “ and I find myself curious as to how time has treated my dearest friend. ” it was the truth, but the word friend felt strange now. hollow in a way it never had before.

closed starter for : @luvished location : the shops in Mayfair

The ding of a shop bells chimed in the air as the cobblestone streets bustled with activity. Kit had been sent to pick up new cuff links that his father had purchased, but he hadn't realized how crowded the shops would be. Kit weaved his way through the maze of people — he’d forgotten what the Season was like in Mayfair. It was much different than being on the front lines of the army. The only similarity was applying the skillful art of dodging bullets — the ones in Mayfair being eager mamas, vying for the attention of any eligible bachelor. Offering polite smiles and hurried excuses, he had managed to avoid being roped into a conversation thus far.

Suddenly, he caught sight of unmistakable blonde curls that caused him to stop in his tracks. With his mouth agape, he watched as the beauty window-shopped, a bright smile in her face as she conversed with another young lady. Cecilia. It had been years since he’d seen her — one day she was just gone without a trace, leaving his heart forlorn. They’d been childhood best friends, but they had also been more — and Kit never had the words to explain it. Before thinking through his actions, he crossed the street, heading straight towards her. His heart was racing — there was so much left unsaid between them, but he wasn’t going to let her slip through his fingers again without talking to her first. “Lady Cecilia,” he greeted her with a bow before gazing upon her in awe, his lips curling into a smile, “It’s been too long.”

[luvished]

her hand squeezed that of her friend gently, and cecilia wondered how she’d managed to do without its warmth. letters had been exchanged between those two, and sometimes it was simply just a share of meaningless gossip, that would’ve made cecilia laugh out loud and then turn to her best friend, realizing that she wasn’t here, next to her. but this time was different, and she felt as if nothing had changed. at least nothing she’d have noticed. “ and it’s truly wonderful to see you.” cecilia said, her voice laced with genuine affection. “ i do believe i have grown weary of my aunt’s company—much as I adore her, of course. though not nearly as much as I do you.” she added, smiling brightly at bea. though the smallest furrow of her brows wanting to disrupt it. “ lady whistledown ? i believe I had quite forgotten she existed. or rather, I very much wish to. ” she sighed in a dramatic manner, glossing over her true feelings she'd been carrying ever since. the accusations about her family have pressed on unwanted emotions, her return casted over by a shadow of uncertainty. truth be told, cecilia feared asking her mother about it, wanting to rather hope that all of these were lies instead of facing the cold certainty of the bare truth. thus, her worry had clouded anything, printed afterwards. even those ridiculous rumours about her best friend and her brother.  “ though i must confess, i did find great entertainment in that particular silly snippet about you and my dear brother. ” she shook her head with an exaggerated air of disbelief. “  i had always presumed lady whistledown to be a woman of considerable wit, yet it seems i was mistaken. for surely, anyone with even the faintest sense would know that you and callum would make the most dreadful pair, no ? ” she waved her free hand as though to dismiss the thought altogether “ besides, I should be the very first to know if there were anything between you and callum. you would never dream of keeping such a thing from me.”

who: beatrice & cecilia ( @luvished ) where: at the bennett house - beatrices room

Beatrice reached out to her friend, taking the others hands in her own. "Oh it is so good to have you home, Ceci!" Beatrice beamed as she looked to her friend. "I have been going crazy here without you." Being without your best friend for as long as she had was bound to be a struggle. Her friends were important to her and none were as important as Cecilia.

"Tell me, have you seen the lady whistledown papers?" She questioned. She wanted to know how much trouble she was in here. Falling for her best friends brother certainly wasn't something which Beatrice had expected. But something had changed between her and Callum in the gardens of the palace and she didn't think that she would ever be able to shake that feeling. Which was why she was worried about her friend having seen the papers. What would she think at the mere suggestion of something happening about she and Callum? Should she try and get ahead of it?

But Beatrice was a little frightened. The idea of losing her friend because of how she felt was too much. Perhaps she could keep the questions at bay - at least until she knew that he felt the same way as she did. Was there any point in rocking the metaphorical boat when this might come to nothing? "There was lots to discuss." She chuckled.

[luvished]

(elle fanning, twenty-eight , ciswoman, she/her) you do not know me but rest assured i know you, LADY CECILIA SINCLAIR . you are the DAUGHTER TO MARQUESS SINCLAIR. you maybe be known for your PERCEPTIVE but it is only a mask for the true nature of your ABRASIVE ways. however, i am not here to spread slander on the queen’s jewels, though i suspect you are her ROSE QUARTZ. the ton says your name reminds them of WELCOMING YOURSELF TO YOUR OWN CAGE, WARM AS THE SUN AND BURNING BRIGHT AS ONE, SPLINTER OF YOUR SOUL CUTTING THROUGH YOUR SKIN. how scandalous! you have been warned, dear reader, that i will prove if this is true and share every last detail.

𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 . cecilia sinclair , nicknames: celia, ceci, cece, cilly 𝐚𝐠𝐞 . 28,  23 july 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 . bisexual 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲: father: marquess of sinclair, mother & marchioness of sinclair: elisabet 'elisa' sinclair, grandmother: dowager marchioness of sinclair siblings: older brother unnamed, older brothers henry sinclair & callum sinclair, younger brother: jasper sinclair 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 . rose aldridge ( downtob abbey ),  jo march ( little women ), elizabeth bennett ( pride and prejudice ), nina zenik ( six of crows ), daphne sullivan ( the white lotus ) 𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒔. perceptive, assertive, ardent, dauntless, gregarious  𝒏𝒆𝒈𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒕𝒔. abrasive, erratic, boisterous, proud, brazen, ill-tempered

𝐛𝐢𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐲 .

( death tw, abuse tw ( slight mention ) )

you're young , spinning stars on your fingertips . a smile so bright that you're blind to everything going on around you. your head is always in the clouds and your dreams are no different from reality. until you wake up . there has been a crack in your blissful ignorance. all the time. and with every day it opens a little more. shattering beneath the weight of your reality. i. cecilia grew up carefree. eyes wide with curiosity and always a smile on her lips. since she’d been young, she’d always ask too many questions, laugh a little bit too loudly and yet always get away with a charming smile. she wasn’t aware how her naivety had been shielding her and somehow despite having so many questions, she’d never asked the right one. ii. as she grew up, she didn't lose any of her brightness. but she was becoming more cunning, daring, rebellious. cecilia had always been close to the staff, and her stubbornness certainly helped with being dangerously persuasive. thus, it was only a matter of time until she’d convince one or two of the staff members to help her sneak out, experience life beyond her beloved home.  iii. there she met a girl called clara. similarly wide-eyed as her but different in every other way. she was a maid who worked for a family of similar status as hers. and despite their differences, a friendship blossomed. cecilia learned a lot from her. what the world was like for people who did not grew up to be as privileged as her. she was ashamed of her ignorance, sometimes ashamed of her own circumstances. the way that it was her birth alone that decided her status. she wanted to help her friend, rearrange the world for her and she swore to her she would. iv. this promise however was meant to be broken by the hands of fate. one day, clara showed up with bruises all over her body, and it was only the faintest twist of her features that betrayed her. cecilia immediately noticed her pain and the truth spilled from clara’s lips, about the cruel way her employers had treated her. as she blurted out an offer to help, between a second passing and a doubting look in clara’s eyes, cecilia noticed that there was only so much she could do. that in fact she was powerless. still, cecilia promised clara that she’d get her out of that house. that she needed a little time, a week, and she’d find a way. steal money or find a way to get her to live in her home. v. a week had not even passed yet, but it only took less than that to erase clara’s existence. it was as if she’d never existed, her death found out by nothing more than coincidence. it was said to be an accident but cecilia knew that none of it was true. again. the same feeling of helplessness. anger fuelling it. she didn’t know who to redirect that anger at. who she was meant to hate. the people who did this to her? the system that failed to protect her friend or herself for being no more different.  vi. she didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. she felt herself getting more detached from everything. from high society, from her life and everything it meant to be her.  vii. all of it (and another reason her secret) led to her completely withdrawing from everyone, which eventually led to her disappearance. she’d asked her parents to be sent away to her aunt living somewhere far off. she did not really disclose the reason and just claimed that she needed a change of scenery. when she was gone, she barely wrote any letters to anyone and then eventually appeared again after some time, acting as if nothing ever happened. 

[luvished]

Elle Fanning as Aurora in Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019) dir. Joachim Rønning

[luvished]

smile hanging on her face, she pulled it up, looking at the other with the same unchanged expression. she could have snapped back, raised her voice, and blamed her sharpness on the lingering disappointment tugging at the strings of her heart, the weight of her own family pressing down on her. and yet, she simply smiled, slipping into her usual role of nonchalance as she stood there, contemplating what she was supposed to say ( or what she shouldn’t ). “ pardon me. I wasn’t looking at you. in fact, i was marveling at the lovely sky today.” feigned naïveté colored her voice as her gaze drifted upward, the greyness contrasting her words. yet she let her eyes linger a little longer, as if insisting on its beauty.   “ oh, the gossip ?” the act of false surprise continued, her eyes widening and her lips curving.. of course, she’d read it. tried to. staring back at letters printed and inked, spelling out her family’s name and then she skipped over it. devouring the leftover of words that had turned meaningless to her so easily.   “ ah, you must be referring to the part where lady whistledown wrote about you stumbling over nothing and ruining a flower bed ? ” cecilia knew full well that no such absurdity had been mentioned. but she felt sorry for the other woman, felt at a loss for what to say to comfort her. “of course, you would never do such a cruel thing,” she added, a ghost of a smirk tugging at her lips. “ those poor flowers. they surely met a tragic fate. ”

who: edith and anyone (open) where: the streets of mayfair

Edit had been up and out of the house early that morning. She had needed a walk, some time to herself. After a particularly bad night - filled of dreams (nightmares) about Arthur - she needed the fresh air to clear her head. That was when she spotted the new Whistledown papers. Although she hated giving the woman any mind, she knew that she would be a fool to not pay attention to everything the Ton was gossiping about. As she read her name and everything that was said, she crumpled the paper in her hands. She looked up, looked around her, as though that would give her any indication on who had done this. Someone knew. She had worked so hard to make sure that her baby was in a safe space, that he was away from here and he was not going to be speculation for the Ton ... not hard enough, clearly. "What are you looking at?!" The young woman snapped at someone daring to glance in her direction. "You do realise that this is nothing but gossip, right?" She growled, her tone clear. There was to be no messing around with her.