m0rbidtalks-blog

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Last Entry

For my last blog entry I wanted to reflect on myself..

I didn’t think I would make it this far through the semester but I am so glad I did. I was so afraid to even apply and now I am in my first finals week! I was always afraid of failing and now I have really great grades! I wouldn’t have been able to do this without the support of my fiancé and if he hadn’t pushed me to apply, I would still be saying “I’ll register next year for fall.” Now I am so close to finishing my prerequisites, I’ll be able to apply for the program I want to get into.

 Even though I have been extremely stressed, I am so excited to for this upcoming semester. This semester has shown me what I need to do so I can achieve more for spring! I was struggling on balancing my time and now I have a better understanding on what I can expect. Sometimes I feel like I’m in over my head but I know this will all be worth it when I graduate.

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Purdue Pharma

There’s always arguments about drug dealers and how they are putting drugs onto the streets, but have you ever thought about the drugs that are prescribed to patients?  We are going through an opioid overdose epidemic, opioid use is one of the leading addictions even when including tobacco and alcohol. With that being said, the use of opioids has caused a storm in drug overdoses and death. Purdue Pharma has pleaded guilty on 3 federal charges, one of those charges being that they marketed to doctors who are suspected of writing illegal prescriptions. I think this is one of the first steps in the right direction. All these companies need to be held accountable for the lives that have been lost. Big corporations only care about their profits, not how badly this has affected people and their family members.

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Kenosha

 With 2020 already being an extremely tough year, we’ve had to face a global pandemic, and multiple protest have broke out due to racial profiling which have caused multiple deaths in the black community. In Kenosha, while a peaceful protest was going on to shed some light on Jacob Black. On August 23rd Jacob Black was shot by police officers and which led to multiple athletes boycotting their first game of the season. On August 25th, two gentlemen were killed and one was injured, by a 17 year old named Kyle Rittenhouse. Joseph Rosenbaum and Anthony Huber were shot during this protest. Kyle is facing charges for what happened and has stated that he would do it again. His bail was set for 2 million dollars, and many groups helped raise money to set him free. These two men that were protesting were there to spread the racial injustice that we are facing and have been for decades. By law, you need to be 18 years old to own a gun in Wisconsin, not only was Kyle under age but he is from Illinois. He traveled over 4 hours and in some way people actually think he’s a hero. If the roles were different and Kyle was a POC, no one would go out of their way to make sure they got out on bail or painted them out to be a hero. There are so many colored people sitting in prison for something so minimal. 

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Entry

So for today’s entry I wanted to speak about an experience that happened to some of my relatives recently. I am so glad to know that one of my family members is moving out to The Woodlands area. We were all enjoying a nice quiet night and all got hungry, so my brother and cousin headed out for some pizza. Well after about 45 minutes, we started to get a little concerned because it doesn’t take that long to get pizza. So after we texted my brother, we had found out that they were pulled over by a cop. After we just patiently waited for them to return, my brother told us the cop asked him to take his hands out of his pockets slowly. I was extremely shocked and thought how scary that must have been. It was around 40 degrees that night and I know I would’ve hand my hands in my jacket pocket from being cold. It made us all wonder why he even said that? The area my cousin moved is predominantly white people and here are 2 Hispanic males driving in this neighborhood with a California license plate. We were all talking about this and then my husband (who is white) maid the comment “Well everyone knows not to have their hands in there pocket.” There was something about that comment that just made my heart drop. As a POC we are always put into more dangerous situations compared to white people and maybe in that moment he forgot, but as my cousin likes to phrase it “His white privilege is showing.” Maybe we all just read into the situation but it all made us realize we need to be a lot more cautious with these things.

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Spooky Season; Serial Killers

In honor of Halloween, I wanted my post to be about this great show I just discovered. If you haven’t seen it and you enjoy learning about serial killers, I would definitely recommend Mindhunter. I started watching this show and it is by far one of the best tv shows I’ve seen in a really long time. This is based on a true story and it’s basically about the FBI researching why people go on mass murders, whether it’s based on sexual, psychological, or childhood trauma beginnings. This is basically how they came up with the term Serial Killers. It can be pretty gruesome but if you look past that, it’s really informative and a must watch in my books. If you enjoy perfectly structured episodes and spot on character portrayals such as Ed Kemper, Charles Manson, or Son of Sam, I definitely recommend you start watching. 

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“My Favorite Murder”

So for my post today, I decided to just speak about a podcast that I’ve been listening to lately and it’s been extremely interesting. At first when I started it, I felt a little odd listening to it because their tone almost made it sound like they were romanticizing murder. The funny part about that was as soon as I was thinking that, the host of the podcast said people were going to hate them because of how many times they kept saying they love murder. What I really enjoyed about the podcast is how they clearly state that they may be wrong on the information and how something may be off and are open to the listeners emailing them for any corrections. Murder podcasts may not be everyone’s cup of tea but this is definitely one of my top podcast, you get to learn about all kinds of murders and you learn that there are a lot of similarities when people were killed and how the killers did it. 

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Publicity Stunt

Recently, Trump stated he tested positive for Covid. I don’t normally like to speak about politics but given the fact that he decided to pull this non-sense a month before elections, made me feel as if I had to say my piece. There are plenty of theories going around stating if he actually even had the disease. I think that he personally pulled this “stunt” to show that the vaccines are “ready” and that people shouldn’t be afraid of this virus. Now coming from a person who tested positive and suffered for 6 weeks, I think he’s taking this whole pandemic as a joke. He somehow is better after he got a vaccine and it has barely been 4 days. I’d like to say that this has all been due to Social Media for this rant but I witnessed a group of Trump supporters down the street of my home with flags because he was “sick.”, and somehow waving his flags was going to show support and magically heal him. This is coming from the same exact group of  people who never believed in Covid.. He is a complete joke and this election will be as well.

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Fail

I wanted to reflect on today’s post about my Deportation essay. I never thought I had an issue with writing until I started that essay. The whole time I was writing, I just wanted to preach about my own views and my own experiences but I felt like I was losing the point of the whole paper. As I think back on my rough draft and my actual paper, I’m starting to realize that I lost the passion when I was discussing the subject on my rough draft compared to my essay, and I started to worry more about meeting the little points that may have been unnecessary. If I can withdraw that paper and redo it, I would. One tip that Dr. Hughes gave me was from our book which stated, “think about the larger conversation about the topic that’s already going on—and to think of your [essay] as a moment when you get to say what you think.”, and for whatever reason I didn’t use my moment to give it my all on my opinion. Now comes the anxiety of waiting for my grade..

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Sexism in the Workplace

So, today’s entry is about working in a field that is predominantly male-dominated and was by far one of the most difficult jobs I have had. For about 4 years I worked as a consultation agent for Geek Squad, which mainly consisted of troubleshooting computers and asking probing questions to our clientele.  Now before I get more into this, I must tell you all that I'm from Los Angeles. As my French teacher once told me, “Los Angeles is filled with a bunch of free-spirited people.” and it’s easy to say that I definitely fit that description. My life in LA was adventurous and exciting! I enjoyed meeting people and conversations to spark a bond. I’d also like to think that I'm an outgoing person who gets along with everyone. But, moving to Texas was a huge 180 for me and has changed my way of being able to communicate with people. 

It had been a few weeks into my position, and I was enjoying it because of how much I learned each day. With the way technology progresses nowadays, there are always new products and software coming out that are just bigger, better, and faster. Not only did I get to learn new technology, but I also learned how to handle extremely tough situations.

It was early in the morning and the store had only been open for a few minutes when a client comes up to the counter. I walked over to him with a smile, as I would normally do, and asked, “How can I help you today?” Instead of greeting me back, he looked at me and said, “I need to speak with a man, I don’t want to work with you.” Now I hope you guys are thinking the same thing I was when that happened. WHAT THE HECK?! Never in my life had I ever experienced that or had even bear witness to it. Obviously, people like this exist, but you just never expect it to happen to you. At that moment I was in shock, so I walked back and got our tech because I was the only front counter agent there! 

I will never forget that day because it was the best thing that could've happened to me. A few female agents worked before in this department so I was confused as to why this even happened. Were women not capable of having knowledge in this field? I ended up finding out that this situation happens more often than I thought. Every single female agent had gone through the exact same thing and they all told me the same thing “stand your ground.” 

Just that one interaction gave me the courage to stand up to the multiple male clients that made me feel belittled. I had been hired to do this because I COULD do it. I was way more than qualified to assist him and besides all, he was here needing OUR help. After that, I did have run-ins with that same issue, and I was able to turn the situation around so that they could trust me. I ended up with multiple clients requesting to work specifically with me. 

If there was a better way for me to handle that, I would love to hear everyone's opinions!

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Entry 1

May I say... this course has been my most difficult but the most enjoyable. I believe myself to be an open and understanding person, but when it comes to controversial discussions I can become hot-headed. Now the more that I get into our reading and discussions, I'm learning that maybe I become some heated is because communication and openness were not there. I thought I had pretty great communication skills, but now I'm starting to understand that maybe I need to slow the brakes and listen instead of just jumping the gun and trying to get my point across.

 I come from a mixed family who have different views on all different topics; whether it’s regarding religion, politics, and more. Now that being said, my one topic that I always have an issue speaking about is religion. I’m a first-generation immigrant child, and for those who aren’t sure about the definition, it means that my parents are immigrants. I grew up as a catholic and as far as I can remember, God was always the reason for anything that was happening in the world or in my life. I would go to church every Sunday and attend Sunday classes. I was baptized and had communion because this was the tradition that my family believed in. I started to become more curious about “God” and I started asking myself “Why would God allow certain horrible events to happen to me?”. 

Fast forward to a few months after my senior year, I lost my best friend. I received multiple messages at work to find out my best friend committed suicide. I was completely distraught and I couldn’t believe it. The pain I felt that day is still unforgettable til this day. The drive home from work was a haze and the next thing I know I'm just sitting on my bed completely lost in my mind. My grandma came into the room and sat next to me and hugged me but what she said after is what led me to completely lose my faith. She asked how my best friend passed away and when I told her she said, “Eso es un pecado.”, meaning “That is a sin.” I felt so hurt and betrayed, not just from my grandma, but because now my best friend was going to “Hell”. Why wouldn’t God stop her? Why didn’t he guide her? Where was God? What was so important that he somehow just missed her and now she’s not here?

 Having this discussion has been a hard one throughout the years, but it has gotten easier over the years. Two days before classes started this year, I was in Los Angeles attending my younger cousin’s funeral. Where we had a prayer for his viewing and went to church before his funeral.  It was bittersweet because all the young cousins knew that this is not what he wanted, but having these traditions is how the older generations got their closure. Religion is an aching topic for me, in the sense that I wish I could believe. I want to hope that there is someone or something out there looking out for our well-being but I don’t. It makes me happy to hear about how passionate people can be about their religion now. Even though I don’t believe in certain beliefs, I can still see the value it has for others. My own experiences have helped me grow to where I am today, but if having faith is what helps you get through your rough moments in life, then I'll support it. 

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Welcome to my blog..

Hey everyone!  I like to think that my life is always just filled with bad luck or maybe I'm just a pessimist because there is always something new coming my way, usually something bad. My motivation for writing is to share my own personal experiences and I hope that people can perhaps learn from the hurdles I’ve had to endure. My goal is to be able to see that I've grown in my writing and communication skills, perhaps learn something about myself along the way. I would love for my readers to give me constructive criticism and help me grow as well! I hope that everyone can learn alongside me as I like to put myself out there and choose to live as an open book. By the end of this, I hope that this little project will allow me to learn how to handle situations and be better at having tough discussions with others.