madaverage

[madaverage]

Need drive https://www.instagram.com/p/CPW2Zqrjwdq/?utm_medium=tumblr

[madaverage]

out the cycle, walk into war, just to fight the torture of boredom https://www.instagram.com/p/CDukegyjGam/?igshid=51vwnewpo99h

[madaverage]

Bad habit. Can’t have it any other way, any other day. Interupt the wave im surfin. Mad, they’re hurting themselves. I can’t help you now. I found the cure, I know for sure, cause where we were ain’t where we are. See, you can’t see, and I see far. I believe but this insecurity is furthering me. No one know me. Feel the cold. Don’t feel no lonely. Nothing sold so no one owes me nothing. I want nothing. but your love. and what you come with. It’s been rough, so rough I run with. So rough I run with… HIGH HORSE(full song link in bio) https://www.instagram.com/p/CBRXIL8jlbI/?igshid=1td8kuegs1pn2

[madaverage]

 SERIOUSLY. You need to listen to this E.P. I genuinely can not draw comparisons to any other sounds that artists are pushing rn and each track on this E.P. has a distinctly different sound. Click this sentence to check it out for yourself. I promise there will be at least one track you will like. If not, feel free to come back and comment about how you didn’t like  it. Anyway, this particular track is called Sisyphus and if you have been following me you may know that it's been in the works for close to a year. Finally put together a project that I feel reflects the sound im chasing. Check the link in bio, you won’t regret it. 

[madaverage]

NARCOSIS. WARREN REMEDY. JUNE 6TH, 2020. https://www.instagram.com/p/CAtiImZjL3f/?igshid=45a95nxxtr8q

[madaverage]

I remember I used to doodle in high school instead of doing anything that would have benefited me academically. I was so invested in doodlin that I almost didn’t graduate. To explain, there were 9 periods in the day and as a senior I had set up my schedule so that I would have an open at the end of the day and get to dip out early. WELL, turns out something about my schedule made it impossible to get the 9th period open, only allowing me an 8th period open. I'm sure I don't need to explain why that blowed as hard as it did, but i’ll do it anyway; I get to leave early… but I have to come back within 30 minutes only to get stuck in the end of school traffic all my buds were pleasantly avoiding. If this 9th period class was just some regular class i’d probably just ditch on the regular, BUT this was consumer education, a class necessary to graduate, so if I was going to ditch I wasn’t going to be getting any diplomas. This all confounded into the self-induced trance I would place myself under upon returning to school to remain mentally unshackled lol. I would forget about time and space and my hot in an unconventional typa way teacher who happened to be speaking some of the last few words I needed to remember to “successfully” transcend this place I had already left in the past. How am I sposed to care when pencil go doodle scrib scrib? https://www.instagram.com/p/B_X9ZnKDIRA/?igshid=1s9bg1i467spl

[madaverage]

So the song in this vid I wrote about the most upsetting dream I may have ever had. 2 days ago I was sitting on my bed watching something on youtube, still wearing jeans and a flannel. Next thing I know i'm in a huge gymnasium where there was this man speaking to a fuckloud of people. I initially wasn’t sure what he was on about but it was clear that some people were there in support of him and other people were not. Confused as I was, I waited until I got an opportunity to ask this man a question to help me figure out what was going on. I don’t remember the question I had asked, but I do remember the response. The man of interest looks at me preparing his response and starts off by first saying my name. I hadn’t told him my name and I knew I was somewhere no one should’ve known me. For some reason the second he said my name, it clicked that all these people were followers of this guy, and this guy was somebody claiming to be the messiah. I was obviously taken aback, unsure as to the credibility to this man's prophet-like demeanor. I thought it was in my best interest to investigate who this man was. After prolonged investigation I found this guy’s current plan of action, written on a large sheet of paper. Written out was his intentions and strategy for actualizing his intent. I ripped the page off the wall it was posted on and found underneath another large sheet of paper that revealed how this guy had known my name. We had been involved in programs together before he had taken up this messiah role. He was just a normal man who was never able to see through his other plans in life, nothing ever seemed to work out for him. I was able to put the pieces together and determine that because of his failure in all other endeavors, he had decided that there was nothing to lose by attempting to be the messiah. This was the way he was to go forward. This was upsetting for me because I was honestly just hoping that he really was the messiah. I realized that the amount of supporters this man had made him incredibly dangerous due to his initial reasons for attaining them in the first place. (Continued in comments) https://www.instagram.com/p/B_TMnTmDYM7/?igshid=1iua5rgj0vtnu

[madaverage]

So the song in this vid I wrote about the most upsetting dream I may have ever had. 2 days ago I was sitting on my bed watching something on youtube, still wearing jeans and a flannel. Next thing I know i'm in a huge gymnasium where there was this man speaking to a fuckloud of people. I initially wasn’t sure what he was on about but it was clear that some people were there in support of him and other people were not. Confused as I was, I waited until I got an opportunity to ask this man a question to help me figure out what was going on. I don’t remember the question I had asked, but I do remember the response. The man of interest looks at me preparing his response and starts off by first saying my name. I hadn’t told him my name and I knew I was somewhere no one should’ve known me. For some reason the second he said my name, it clicked that all these people were followers of this guy, and this guy was somebody claiming to be the messiah. I was obviously taken aback, unsure as to the credibility to this man's prophet-like demeanor. I thought it was in my best interest to investigate who this man was. After prolonged investigation I found this guy’s current plan of action, written on a large sheet of paper. Written out was his intentions and strategy for actualizing his intent. I ripped the page off the wall it was posted on and found underneath another large sheet of paper that revealed how this guy had known my name. We had been involved in programs together before he had taken up this messiah role. He was just a normal man who was never able to see through his other plans in life, nothing ever seemed to work out for him. I was able to put the pieces together and determine that because of his failure in all other endeavors, he had decided that there was nothing to lose by attempting to be the messiah. This was the way he was to go forward. This was upsetting for me because I was honestly just hoping that he really was the messiah. I realized that the amount of supporters this man had made him incredibly dangerous due to his initial reasons for attaining them in the first place. So, I destroyed his elaborate plans, by literally just ripping the page tf up. F https://www.instagram.com/p/B_TME-1DLGC/?igshid=p92gsrm01ztv

[madaverage]

Wrote a song last night. Threw together an instrumental that had a sort of reflective vibe to it. Got me thinking about something I think about more as time goes by; Every single detail of every single thought/event/decision led me precisely where I am right now. The same goes for every person who has ever lived or who will ever live. It may be strange to associate a seemingly trivial decision you made when you were 5 years old with where and how you exist in the present, but when you deconstruct the branching decision tree of life, that 5 year old's future leans on his decision between the dinosaur shaped chicky nugs and the tiny tree vegetable. I encourage you to reflect however far back you want about a crossroad you came to. Think about what you decided to do and how that decision led you to where you are now. Think about how life could look if you acted differently. The ‘small’ details are most important. For me, an example of just how far you can go with this would be reflecting on the how I used to never eat dinner. Regularly not eating dinner had led me to where I am right now but maybe if I had gotten into the habit of eating dinner I would’ve felt less depleted as the night concluded. If I had felt less depleted maybe I would’ve felt up to seeing through the tasks/projects I started earlier in the day. If I had finished up the things I started in the day maybe I wouldn’t have this feeling of discouragement when starting a new thing.If I didn’t have this sense of discouragement when starting new things maybe there would be less doubt in my subconscious, allowing or even encouraging me to begin more ambitious things. If i’d complete these more ambitious things then maybe … I could go on forever. I just threw this example together but most of the time when I think like this it’s with a positive angle. Like how things could have ended up much worse, with me in a mental or physical place that's more undesirable. Either way I think these thoughts are important for me to recognize that whatever it is I am doing in the moment will inevitably result in where i'm going. It’s best I try to make sure that’s a place I want to be. https://www.instagram.com/p/B_Lbe1HDlDN/?igshid=t9rfds46yxmf

[madaverage]

Since this whole “social distancing” thing began I’ve fallen into a cycle where I sleep a whole day then wake up and stay up to make music for 2 days straight. It began with me thinking it would be a good idea to just keep going once I got into the flow instead of building up all this momentum just to destroy it in an attempt to keep a normal person's circadian rhythm. Since then I find it difficult rationalizing going back. This song is one of the many examples of this schedule's benefits. I woke up yesterday at around 9pm and worked on cleaning up a couple different songs before I got deep in the zone and was in a mood to write/produce a new song. So I did. I distorted the song in this video cause for some reason it doesn’t feel right showing off a song that’s unmixed, unmastered, and not clean. If you are familiar with my posts you may have noticed the commonality among my posts being the distorted audio. Most of what I post with distorted audio will sooner or later be finalized for streaming platforms, so if you are interested check ‘left zane’ on all streaming platforms. If not i’m sure I will be dropping some clips of the finalized audio on ig in the form of music video snips. Gotta lotta music vids otw and in my head, at least one is dropping this month to the Mad Average Youtube channel. I’ll keep anyone here for it updated! Hit me in the dm’s for anything at all… PEACE https://www.instagram.com/p/B_GjuaFjsqc/?igshid=qxbfrgtxtz2b

[madaverage]

This was the Cover Art to my E.P. “Real Nobody” that dropped last month. It was originally just a pencil sketch but I thought the vibes matched the E.P. I was working on so I scanned it into my computer to see if I could make it look “complete”. I spent like a whole ass day making it what it is, creating at least 100 versions from the initial sketch. Making 100 versions of a piece of art sounds like a good idea until the time comes to decide which one is the “best”. I’m already a pretty indecisive person so it should come as no surprise that the finalization(i.e. choosing the winner) is the most difficult part. The brainpower required for the piece often dwells in comparison to the brainpower required to make decisions regarding the piece. I regularly spend days that eventually turn into weeks working on art that, if i'm being honest with myself, likely isn’t going to be seen by anyone that will care for it. I don’t want to be selfish with what I create. I want to share it with people but I haven’t yet figured how to do so. Ingrained in my subconscious there’s an unfounded idea that somewhere in the small details of my art lies a mistake that will result in a disconnect between the way I feel about my art and its ability to make the connection to those it's intended. There is potential everywhere, and each second that passes is another second wasted. ⏳ If you like my art, follow @mad.ave.rage or share my posts wit someone if you wanna help me out. If you actually read this far in, you probably already have a sense of how much I appreciate you. Thanks for stickin with me. The best is yet to come. 🌻 https://www.instagram.com/p/B_A9n3RDKJP/?igshid=1vyojexy9s5o0

[madaverage]

I dreamt last night my recently departed dog and I were exploring a large abandoned baseball field in the middle of woods so dense I had no sense how deep we were. There were chain link fences littered around this place, and for whatever reason we had to get over top of them. At the time of my dog's death, she struggled to walk, so in this dream I remember feeling concerned that the fences were too high for her to climb. However, she managed to clear them, needing no help from me as if she was in the best shape of her life. She acted in the dream as i'm sure she would’ve wanted me to remember her. This dream comes only days after I had looked through an SD card that had pictures of her scattered throughout. I was reminded of what I had tried to forget. I was reminded of the times I felt like she was my only real friend in the world, like the only thing in my life that remained honest was her. She was ALWAYS pure, unadulterated love, and I need not forget about her. https://www.instagram.com/p/B-7qo2BDIEL/?igshid=6n50osgorzt3

[madaverage]

Planning on doing more of these drawing/doodling timelapse videos. Hopefully next time with a little bit more direction.

[madaverage]

PREDATOR. PREDETERMINED. PREDESIGNED. PRETENTIOUS. PREDATOR. PREMONITION. https://www.instagram.com/p/B-2_54KDF8l/?igshid=1njcs71vrajnx

[madaverage]

Eyes innocent, staring at the wrong pair. Don’t make sense, she got snakes for hair. . This song now holds my personal record for fastest song. Went from inexistent at 3am to how it sounds rn at 9am. Might include it on my April EP, idk. . 👁👁🐍 https://www.instagram.com/p/B-2cOg-jzTe/?igshid=e26f1c9d4xm7

[madaverage]

Remember me? . Thought I’d try out a new type of video. I had fun making it. Lemme know what you think! . The song is a distorted version of an upcoming song I’m still finalizing. . I been steady stockpiling a lotta cool shit for social media. Follow @madaverageofficial to see what’s next!! https://www.instagram.com/p/B-xw-hmDbuh/?igshid=1ksmpef4k9l42

[madaverage]

Hows isolation treating everybody? . This tracks on my new EP: “Real Nobody” - Left Zane Streaming everywhere, link in bio! This vids gonna drop to the Mad Average YouTube channel sometime this week as well. Hope everyone stays safe and happy in these strange times. ✌🏼 https://www.instagram.com/p/B-AltkYjZ8s/?igshid=11c39ffvh4oec