magandajinx

[magandajinx]

Jason: *icing cake he baked* Tim: oh, cool. Can I take a picture? That’s really pretty. Jason: uh, sure? Why? Tim: to post it on insta. Jason: *stops icing cake* what’s insta? Tim: Tim: *look of slowly dawning horror* you died. Oh my god you died— Jason: *muttering* I thought we already acknowledged that. You know, quite explosively acknowledged it Tim: *completely speaking over him* DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT A SNAPCHAT IS? FUCK— Jason: dude you’re hyperventilating

[magandajinx]

'ao3 needs a like and dislike button'

what you need, my algorithm-rotten minded friend, is a grip

[magandajinx]

Bruce Wayne is definitely that father. The father who buys stuff in bulk the second he hears his kids like it. You open the pantry the day after you mention around Bruce you like any kind of food, and that’s the only thing you see for the next five months.

Tim snacking on something he found in the foyer, working on a case while needing a nap, seeing Bruce enter: mh..

Bruce seeing him: hm?

Tim holding up the snack: Mhm.

Bruce: hmm…

Tim the next day, freshly awake from a 10 hour long coma nap, entering the foyer: WHAT THE FUCK?!

Said snack being the only thing on the first 10 shelves.

Bruce walking by: I went shopping.

[magandajinx]

MY SHAYLAAAAAAASS

And they were soulmates.

Happy secret santa for @probablytoooldforthis !

[magandajinx]

I feel this on a spiritual level.

Me: *scrolling through normal tag on ao3*

Me: *sees something*

Me, quickly filtering some tags out: We listen and we don't judge, we listen and we don't judge, we listen and we don't judge

[magandajinx]

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

[magandajinx]

I love this so much oh my lord

I’ve had a hard time getting around to posting this one but it’s my favorite

Let Me Tell You A Tale: A Bard’s Poem

Humans and spirits, beings of each plane,

Let me tell you a story of love and pain.

Or a tale of the terrors of going insane.

A tale of beautiful, luscious fields,

Or one of a fighter, and the weapon he wields.

Let my words be like music through your left and right ear.

Let them bring about comfort, joy, sorrow, or fear.

I’m but a mere bard, that much may be true,

But every word that I say is only for you.

For humans that suffer, and gods who weep,

And the warriors who carry their swords in their sleep.

So rest your bones, weary traveler. Please, take a chair.

If you’ll let me, I have many stories to share.

What I’ve seen far and wide is hard to imagine,

From victories triumphant to nightmares too tragic.

Ev’ry spirit lingers, and dreams take flight.

Stories are beacons, they’re stars in the night.

So I’ll be your guide through this tapestry spun,

A flick of the page, and our story’s begun.

[magandajinx]

OHSHC rlly was just straight ppl with extra steps.

theyre like if we mixed yaoi and yuri together to make a fucked up couple where thw guy and the girl date

[magandajinx]

OMG???? 😭

twenty years across the sea

[magandajinx]

[magandajinx]

some of you bitches deserve a nap and a milkshake tbh

[magandajinx]

What... What if they ask Momo to make a larger copy of the shirt for him? I hate to see Zawa sad over something like this

a helping hand!

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Happy Birthday Bakugo, you gremlin

[magandajinx]

i feel like bakugou would find these pictures when hes older and just have a whole ass breakdown

[magandajinx]