magicandlight

[magicandlight]

every year I post this meme and every year people get more mad at me than they did the previous year

[magicandlight]

i kind of feel like if you take "don't bomb iran" as an endorsement of the iranian government, you're not intellectually ready to engage in conversations about real-world politics. Go talk about steven's universe instead

[magicandlight]

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

[magicandlight]

i don’t know how to explain to you people that no matter what a country’s government is like i do not and will not support the US indiscriminately bombing that country’s civilians and i don’t know why that’s a controversial take tbh

[magicandlight]

reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

[magicandlight]

we need to make using chatgpt embarrassing bc sorry it really is. what do you mean you can’t write an email

[magicandlight]

all politics about ai aside if you use it to create fanwork you're just a fucking dweeb

[magicandlight]

kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it

[magicandlight]

i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever

[magicandlight]

They should invent a method of asking for reassurance that nobody secretly hates you that doesn't make people secretly hate you.

[magicandlight]

can anyone tell me the watch order for every movie ever so i can understand all references and homages

[magicandlight]

Yeah that tracks

[magicandlight]

i'm a little afraid to go to pride this year. many of us are, a little. sitting around our tapas and video games, the silence that hangs over the discord server. it feels different, we say.

we're privileged. the community that came before us laid the groundwork so i could be raised in a different world, and i will never forget their sacrifices and dedication. they gave us this: a pride that feels like community and celebration and joy. i remember the first few times i went to a queer event - i'd been raised so catholic. feeling safe like that, for the first time... it saved my life. i go to pride to celebrate that feeling - my people, laughing. out in the sun, the way we couldn't have been even 25 years ago. that feeling: no wonder we call it "pride."

who am i to be afraid anyway. there are parts of the world where people are doing much better work than i am. but it's just: i felt at home there, you know? and this year feels different. we are waiting on the dam to break. last year, at boston pride, there was a whole gaggle of sign-holders shouting about jesus. you walk around them and try not to let it get to you.

this year, i'm going to DC's pride with my girlfriend. google sends me concerns about if it's safe to exist in trump's america, if World Pride is a bigass target on all of us. every article uses the words "safety concerns" many, many times. three days ago i witnessed a shooting.

even straight people keep telling me - people are weird lately. sometimes we blame it on Covid and sometimes we blame it on the full moon. but i do remember a time before this, right. it's not just that people are more comfortable being rude. it's this strange, outwards violence. a comfort in being cruel.

it's a big hole to fall down anyway. it's not like they're going to do anything to make pride safe, not really. i don't want a police presence as the solution. and what if this is just fearmongering! what if this is just to get us to stop attending our own events! what if everything is actually fine, and i'm just freaked out by the stated intentions of our president!

and what if i'm just listening to things that are being said. what if i'm weighing the shape and size of this america accurately.

my mother calls me. she's been getting the articles too. i assure her i'll be careful, but i put the phone down and stare at it. i'm going to go to pride. other people made it safe for me, it is my duty and my honor to show up for my community. the only thing we've ever had was each other. it was always an act of bravery. being ourselves is brave.

but i am afraid. i lay out my outfit and i kiss my girlfriend. i cut my nails and clean up my undercut. i hold her hand and hang the sunset flag. the sound of this america feels different. like a volcano trembling. i will love her and i will love being queer and i will sing over the noise of it.

but ... still. in the back of my mind. that feeling, like something terrible has been shifted. like somewhere in the night - they remembered we're different.

[magicandlight]

i must not let the fatigue get me i must not let the inertia take me i must not lie down, i must keep fighting. oh giles corey, patron saint of more weight, protect me as i walk forward, endlessly. so many days now i wake and the exhaustion presses her hands on my shoulders. she asks me what more can you do? and i close my eyes to her. i have given up so much already. i must not kiss her. she dances so beautifully. she makes this bed into a promise. i must not lie down, love. i must get up. i must keep fighting.

[magicandlight]

look, guys, this may seem ironic coming from a person with Verbose Disease, but I'm about to tell you the secret to winning social media: shutting the fuck up. you have a controversial discourse opinion? shut the fuck up and no one will know. can't participate in a boycott for various reasons? shut the fuck up and no one will know. you think or do something Problematic that has no bearing on anyone but yourself? shut the fuck up and no one will know. you haven't been keeping up on a pressing social issue? shut the fuck up and no one will know. your mind is a wonderful place where you can have all the bad takes in the world and they're all perfectly insulated from everyone and everything unless you try to excise them on a grand scale. you can take the mental L all by yourself without using a public platform as a confession booth and face zero repercussions and it'll be just fine. open up a damn diary and explain yourself there.

[magicandlight]

I had grown up so far as I could see to the bottom of all things. I entertain hope no longer in anything. Like a dead frog. I enter into everything with a calm despair, just as I go to sea believing firmly that I will be drowned. This, however, does not mean that I have been in despair. On the contrary I shall not lose my cheerfulness to the end of my days. This certain despair is even a kind of pleasure to me. It is akin to a feeling which serves to maintain my continuing life with a conscious and courageous pleasure - a feeling which is akin to belief. No other pleasure and inspiration for me! I am confident of managing sufficiently with only a sense of duty. Confident of being able to continue to sing the song of a cicada with the mental attitude of an ant.

Nakajima Atsushi, Light, Wind, and Dreams

[magicandlight]

People speak of “having a resolve to die,” but Wukong has no such thing. No matter what kind of danger he finds himself in, he considers only the success or failure of the undertaking, but not his own life.

Nakajima Atsushi, “On Admiration: Notes by the Monk Wujing” from The Moon over the Mountain and Other Stories