magmahurricane

[magmahurricane]

affirmations

i am a complex organism brutally engineered by uncaring forces of nature

i am a product of billions of years and trillions of deaths

i am building a machine greater than myself

i am able to make phone calls and appointments

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I like to think that we’re like hamsters to the transformers. insanely easy to squish, with a short lifespan and we die in the most unexpected and crazy ways

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A bit of a pallet cleanser for everyone.

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compilation of my favorites so far. this energy for 2025 please

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following weird horny furries who are into shit like pooltoys and transformation and stuff is enrichment. the vitamins and minerals of posting

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i saw a sub/dub comparison of this scene on youtube years ago and it has refused to leave my mind ever since so i'm recreating it here since i can't find the original video anymore

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I know all the posts about how to stockpile hrt come from a good place but yall. Stockpiling T on purpose is a felony and its not one i judge you for but...STOP admitting it out loud on your blogs frankly and with none of the "teehee THEORETICALLY" shoplifter blogs used to have. Im seeing people talk abt the stockpiles they already have AND their plans to share it and my guys... this website WILL give your personal info to the government if subpoenad. Idk that its LIKELY but I know itd be embarrassing as hell to go to JAIL for felony possession of controlled substance w intent to distribute bc you couldnt stop yourself from YAPPING on a fucking tumblr post and then mr hammers gave your email and login ip to the cops. I KNOW youre all not using secure enough burners and vpns and shit 4 that Cmon now

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happy fagged out friday

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obviously dietary requirements aren't a joke but my grandma sometimes runs errands for her church and i asked her what she's up to today and she said extremely seriously "ive got to track down the body of the gluten free christ, julia"

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I hate that thing some people do where it's like. "I left my wallet on the table to see if you'd say anything" or "I wanted to see if you'd wash the car if I stopped doing it"

Cause like

I dont know about anyone else

But I am perpetually hovering three inches above the strong subconscious belief that everyone knows what they're doing at all times except me, so if you change your normal patterns and I notice, then I will assume it is an intentional choice with a thought-out plan behind it and I will avoid interfering

And if I don't notice, because I won't, because why would I, because not much bothers me and if you don't say anything to indicate you are bothered then how would I KNOW

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"xyz DNI" blocking people is YOUR job, sorry. You cannot ask the world to simply move around you, you have to take control of your online experience or you will be fucking miserable forever. Most people don't read your bio/pinned/carrd before touching the posts that cross their dash anyways.

Also maybe worry less about if someone who likes something you hate clicks on your tumblr post. I promise it is not that fucking serious.

Also-also if you have this DNI because your friends/moots said or implied you have to otherwise you're somehow Bad and/or will be punished by them if you don't, that's kind of fucked and maybe you need less controlling friends.

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ohnoe

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having tortured ocs is so funny bc some of em im projecting personal issues onto & some of em im just like Fuck You. Random Chimp Event

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*doom music starts to play* I actually kindof like scheduling these kinds of appointments now...

but seriously Fellas, don't forget to schedule a pap smear every couple of years just in case. If you still have a cervix you can still get cervical cancer. ilu

this has been a psa

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what the fuck makes phone apps so cocky as to send me notifications telling me to use it. my grocery list app straight up went "you havent made a list in a while! 🙂" are you out of your fucking mind. you are a program. why are you speaking to me like youre my equal. i could replace you with a pen and the back of a receipt. idiot. i kill you now