magpies-random-blog
magpies-random-blog
"Fuck all y'all, I'm out, I just want a KFC!"
41K posts
| Magpie | 23+ | Scotland | In a Relationship, ya fuken crawlers 😂| Personal blog for mun and her many shitposts! No hate please, although tbh, I probably won't give a fuck if you do. Paypal!: paypal.me/CKeenanCommissions (Osmosis Jones OC Blog: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/khloeandosmosis)  [TF2 OC Blog: https://www.tumblr.com/blog/kasithemedic]
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magpies-random-blog · 13 hours ago
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magpies-random-blog · 24 days ago
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magpies-random-blog · 26 days ago
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Trying to inflict psychic damage to a tumblr user is like trying to irradiate a cockroach, like it can be done, but the lethal dose is not safe for humans either
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magpies-random-blog · 29 days ago
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this is so wild
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magpies-random-blog · 3 months ago
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As a paramedic, Ratchet's alt mode in tfp driving around Jasper is hilarious to me.
We usually know who is on what ambulance unit and where the other ambulances are. They have GPS trackers on them/on the ambulance's phone, so dispatch can see where they are. Jasper is a small town, so their EMS/Fire dept is likely small as fuck. So the first responders all likely know each other and what's going on.
NO ONE can track this weird ass ambulance. Dispatch has no idea where it came from.
The other medics in Jasper being like "what fucking unit is that" or "what THE FUCK." There's no department marking or star of life on Ratchet's alt's exterior, but it has lights and sirens. Which is fucking illegal.
The other first responders talk about the Mysterious Unknown ambulance that is OCCASIONALLY spotted like a fucking cryptid. It becomes an inside joke/urban legend.
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magpies-random-blog · 5 months ago
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magpies-random-blog · 5 months ago
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COMMUNITY 1.12: Comparative Religion
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magpies-random-blog · 5 months ago
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excavator operator playing with a scrapped learjet at miami-opa locka Executive Airport.
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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I truly hate the word "unalive." There are so many other euphemisms that fictional Italian mobsters worked so hard to provide you with and you just ignore them.
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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via indiarosecrawford
Frog Paints a Water Lily Pond 🪷🎨🐸
𝑓ₒᵣ ⲕᵢ𝑛𝑔 ₐ𝑛𝑑 𝑐ₒ𝑡𝑡ₐ𝑔ₑ
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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just had to take a fucking second and close my eyes because i remembered that on the night of november 5th tumblr had convinced me, an outsider, that this was an actual gif of Castiel Supernatural being sent to mega fruit hell
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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on my way home last night I stopped to buy gas and realized that my fuel door was almost completely covered in ice and frozen shut so I did the logical thing and crouched down and lifted my shirt and pressed my naked belly against it until it melted
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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pov you’re on tumblr for halloween:
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magpies-random-blog · 6 months ago
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magpies-random-blog · 7 months ago
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Friend of mine was submitting a job application and discovered that they REQUIRED a photo:
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We're trying to decide which of these is a better option:
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or
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magpies-random-blog · 7 months ago
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magpies-random-blog · 7 months ago
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you always see that gif or a screenshot of this scene but you need to hear the line delivery. it's so funny to me
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