malewifenjoyer
malewifenjoyer
533 posts
archival/??? blog. just a teeny bit obsessed with ouran highschool host club. this is my ouran blog in the year 2025
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malewifenjoyer · 3 days ago
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ages
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malewifenjoyer · 8 days ago
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malewifenjoyer · 10 days ago
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TAMAKI GAVE BIRTH
if he could he would
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malewifenjoyer · 14 days ago
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TAMAKI GAVE BIRTH
if he could he would
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malewifenjoyer · 14 days ago
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new arrival
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malewifenjoyer · 22 days ago
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Ouran, Performance, Audience
Okay I said I was going to write this and I can't look at it anymore so posting. Anyway, performance in Ouran is interesting and we’ve all been chatting about it lately. Each character puts on an “act” for the guests, each character puts on another “act” for the people around them. It’s a testament to how well the characters are written that we can unravel these performances throughout the text. I still think there’s several levels of reading the characters and the text as well. 
Ouran is satire- hence why they’re essentially parodying these archetypes. But Ouran is also self-aware, self-referential, and meta. Characters break the fourth wall. They’re, at varying levels, aware of being in a story. We have characters who obviously break the fourth wall (Kyoya looking right into the camera in episode 1, for example. I would say Tamaki’s “homosexual supporting cast” speech, except it’s kind of an anomaly for him) and characters who are resistant to any sort of self-reflection that might lead them to any sort of conclusions like this (Hikaru.) I will at one point go through the entire manga again and count how many times each character narrates– which, to my recollection, is uncommon outside of Haruhi (MC obvs, and framed as talking to her mother) and Kaoru (framed as talking to himself/ the audience/ Hikaru-that-lives-in-his-brain) but I could be misremembering.
This is generally played for comedic effect. Tamaki breaks the fourth wall when it’s funny. Kyoya plays dumb about plot conventions (such as “we have birthdays here?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”) when it’s funny for him to do so. 
Anyway that’s just my setup. I want to discuss the Paris Arc, specifically whatever is going on with Kaoru. 
Read More because this is 2k words.
Kaoru is an interesting character because I think the performance is a little more pronounced. There’s reason to interpret he generally controls the scripts, his host club act is a bigger deviation from his natural personality, and fundamentally, as a person, Kaoru is less solid in his sense of identity. 
Which does kind of beg a question. The version of Kaoru the host club girls get is clearly fake. But the Kaoru most people get is some form of a mask. Kaoru reflects Hikaru– which is what Hikaru needs until Kaoru fears he doesn’t. Kaoru seems to take Haruhi’s assertion that he’s the “less evil one” to heart. I think neither Hikaru or Kaoru know what Haruhi is going to say is the difference between them in Episode/Chapter 5 because they themselves don’t know– aside from this very philosophical “well the one who is you is the one who is not me and the one who is not you is me etc.”
Anyway, we all kind of understand the general baseline– Hikaru is going to grow up, fall in love, and spread his wings– Kaoru is afraid this means Hikaru will leave him behind. This is the plot. 
But I think a lot of this comes down to “the thing they won’t be able to share,” which is presented to us in the form of that cookie. Haruhi notes that Kaoru will just give whatever it is to Hikaru. Hikaru ultimately snaps the cookie in half and forces Kaoru to take half of it anyway. This kind of embodies the fundamental difference between them, in my book. 
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(Ch. 45, various spliced together pages) Hikaru: It is literally not on Hikaru’s radar that there might ever be anything that he and Kaoru do not share. He does not conceive this on any level before the Paris Arc. Kaoru will literally always be here, he is a constant that Hikaru cannot conceive losing. Hikaru’s not afraid of Kaoru abandoning him– he may be, afraid something will happen to Kaoru that will take him away, but he’s not afraid of Kaoru choosing to leave. Why would he? Kaoru is the one person who cannot betray him. 
Kaoru: It is a given that Hikaru will one day leave. It is simply the only way. Hikaru will grow up and, for various reasons, Kaoru will not grow with him. And Hikaru will choose to leave– this will not be a betrayal, it’s just how life works when you’re not the main character in your story. Your carriage turns back into a grubby ole pumpkin and you’re left all alone. 
After the cookie scene, Kaoru tells Hani that he has feelings for Haruhi. This is, in my opinion, when Kaoru takes the reins of the narrative. Of the carriage, so to speak. The carriage in the anime exists on the condition that no one acknowledges that they’re in a love story and “breaks” the found family. Kaoru saying he’s in love with Haruhi steers the narrative on the course to the inevitable. 
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Which is great!
Except is Kaoru in love with Haruhi? 
My hypothesis: it literally doesn’t matter. Kaoru’s feelings for Haruhi do not drive the narrative. Kaoru talking about it does. He could be lying. He could be mistaken. He could be genuinely in love with her. It could be an idle crush. It doesn’t matter. It’s the performance of this love for the appropriate audience (aka: Hani, Hikaru etc.) that matters.
I think the base reading of this arc is that the cookie is Haruhi. Haruhi is the one thing they can’t share, right? They can’t like, keep eating biscuits out of her mouth and licking her face if Hikaru wants her to be his girlfriend and Kaoru wants her too. While I don’t think it’s incorrect to read this as a concern Kaoru has, I don’t think it gets to the heart of the issue. 
So, performance!
Kaoru puts on his little act for Hikaru throughout the Paris Arc. Generally tormenting him, ostracising him. In a way giving him a taste of what Kaoru goes through in a zillion Hika/Haru fanfictions or Kaoru’s own nightmares. This culminates in the date, where Kaoru basically brings Haruhi on the date he asked her on first (before giving it to Hikaru) and hitting every single mark that Hikaru missed. Not that anyone is enjoying themselves regardless to be honest. 
And of course, at the end, he kisses her and Hikaru sees and runs off upset. 
Except we, the audience, know Kaoru kisses Haruhi on the cheek. It’s a clear enough stage kiss from the art. Just close enough for us to understand that, from Hikaru’s perspective, Kaoru kissed her on the mouth. We’re bystanders, watching this plot unfold. Hikaru is Kaoru’s intended audience– that’s who he’s performing for. 
So what’s the difference then between this scene.
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And this scene?
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Well, first: what else can be the one thing Hikaru and Kaoru can’t share? If you go one level further, I think you come to the conclusion that Hikaru is the one thing they can’t share. After all, Hikaru cannot keep giving half of himself, half of his time, energy, love, self etc. to Kaoru all the time, and grow up. They suffer a classic case of enmeshment. Kaoru determines that Hikaru needs to be shoved out of the nest– and that the only way to do that is to stab him in the back. 
I don’t think Kaoru is trying to make Hikaru hate him. I do think what he’s trying to do is make Hikaru realise that he’s a person? Who is capable of betraying him, just like any other person. As long as Hikaru believes that Kaoru is “the only person he can trust,” he’s never going to grow up. By knocking himself off that pedestal in Hikaru’s eyes, Hikaru is forced to see him differently and Kaoru is prepared to accept however Hikaru might feel about him in the aftermath (though assuming he’ll drastically distance himself). 
(Side note. I think Hikaru and Kaoru internalise their maid-related-trauma slightly differently. While Kaoru’s fear is abandonment, Hikaru’s fear is betrayal. They just manifest similarly because there’s a lot of crossover. This is sooo long already, I’m not getting into it unless someone asks lmao.)
Loop back to the image again then. What’s the difference here? Well, it’s still a stage kiss! They both are. But, with one fundamental difference. 
Image one, Hikaru is Kaoru’s audience. He is performing to trick Hikaru (and possibly anyone else, like Hani and Mori, watching). But reality is clear to us, the reader.
Image two, you are Kaoru’s audience. He is performing to trick you. (but reality is clear to Hikaru, the participant)
Like, that’s pretty in your face huh? Faces obscured in a way that you don’t infer it as a cheek kiss as easily as you do with Kaoru and Haruhi. It’s also on the left page of the physical edition, meaning you have to skip to the next page to see the aftermath:
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Kaoru’s not just tricking the audience. He’s queerbaiting the audience. Typical.
Firstly, I do think one can be led to the conclusion that if the one thing they can’t share is Hikaru, not Haruhi, that means Kaoru is not in love with Haruhi but is in love with Hikaru. In fact, I think that’s kind of the point with these panels. It’s framed as a bait-switch, which only works if the audience misinterprets the kiss. My ultimate conclusion therefore is that there is no textual romantic incest occuring. It is enmeshment at a bare minimum though. But that's another topic, another day, for somebody else.
Secondly, I think this is because the audience is, regardless, on the wrong track. Or at least not the full track. We have access to the narrative when other characters don’t, but we’re still reading the story Kaoru is telling. We’re still the audience to his performance of the story. It’s easier for Kaoru to tell a story that’s all about his brother– he’s been doing it his whole life. He’s not the main character, after all. So he’s telling us a story where the one thing they cannot share is Hikaru, telling all the other characters a story where the one thing they can’t share is Haruhi. 
So the one thing they can’t share is something more nebulous. It’s the identity. 
Which feels like a contradiction in a way, because the identity is Hikaru, isn't it?
They can’t be one double act, split down the middle. They can’t be one seed sprouting two leaves. They can’t be two halves of one cookie, or two halves of one soul. And the problem is, Kaoru views everything as something Hikaru has split down the middle and shared with him– and now he has to give it all back. 
I don’t really think Hikaru views “their room” as being “his room, that I share with Kaoru.” But I think Kaoru does. I think Kaoru views everything as something Hikaru has shared with him, right down to his own personality, his own face. Hikaru cannot leave, cannot grow up, unless Kaoru stops pretending to be him and gives him the half of his identity back to make one whole, true Hikaru. 
Only problem is, Kaoru has to cut that tricky spare leaf off. After all, when he gives Hikaru back the identity, Kaoru won’t have one. Kaoru is defined as being “the one who is not Hikaru.” My brother is Hikaru. The one who is not my brother is me. And how do you define that? When your brother is no longer there, who are you? 
That’s why it’s important that Hikaru dyes his hair. Because I don’t think him dyeing his hair matters if the issue is Haruhi (Haruhi can tell them apart anyway). I don’t think it matters if the issue is Hikaru (this would not, in isolation, fix Kaoru's thought process). 
It is however enough for Hikaru to be able to illustrate to Kaoru that their identity is inherently interwoven, not necessarily shared. It doesn’t matter if Kaoru is the same as Hikaru or not– because Kaoru is who he is. That may have been affected by the fact that they’re twins, but his identity is not negated by it. Kaoru's identity is not inherently a performance just because it reflects Hikaru, and he doesn't lose it when he ceases to reflect Hikaru.
(breathes)
CAVEAT AS ALWAYS: I am reading the English translation. While it is the official Viz Media translation, something is always changed in translation, localisation, and interpretation. With the assumption that everyone here is reading the manga in English (sweeping assumption, sorry) this is therefore a reading of the text inherently coloured by the site of circulation (English translation, volume compiled) and the site of audiencing: aka the fact that I am an English-speaking, European, media studies/animation academic, speaking on an largely American blogging platform to the like, twelve Kaoru stans that follow me. It also means your interpretation may be very different to mine! Anyway If you read this far, congrats! You deserve a cookie– whatever that might or might not signify.
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malewifenjoyer · 25 days ago
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ouran i love u dearly my stupid child
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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my new chiikawa ocs chiitama and kyokawa
chiitama cries a lot and kyokawa is a piece of shit
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Tamaki's actor was a little too excited about the twins doing a high five.😅
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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"Forte⤴" Huddles || Ouran High School Host Club ƒ Musical
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Hitachiin Hikaru & Hitachiin Kaoru || OHSHC ƒ Musical Backstage
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Hitachiin Kaoru (Futaba Kaname) || Ouran High School Host Club ƒ Musical
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Musical Ouran High School Host Club ƒ Backstage
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Haninozuka Mitsukuni || Ouran High School Host Club ƒ Musical Backstage
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Hikaru's actor refusing to do a clasp-to-hug with Satoshi's actor :P
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malewifenjoyer · 28 days ago
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Musical Ouran High School Host Club ƒ Backstage ↳ Kaname (Kaoru) explains why he was the one who gave Junya (Tamaki) the bouquet for his birthday.
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malewifenjoyer · 29 days ago
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hi i just spent a good chunk of time most scrolling through all of ur tamahuru art i love them sm they have such a sweet and cozy vibe in ur art style
i love how gnc they both r like haruhi was the the blueprint for me realizing i was pretty ehhh about gender all tg and even tho it wasn’t really explored in the anime tamaki would be down for genderfuckery after some character development
i fear this may have just brought back my ohshc obsession… guess i gotta go open ao3 now…
Omg thank you so much!! That’s so awesome to hear! They’re both so gender to me.
Your last sentence made me audibly go “WAIT HANG ON” because the Haruhi x Tamaki tag on ao3 is so treachorous imo. Like, so much Reader/OC stuff, breakup/divorce fics in the tag, it’s hard to find plain old shipping fics. So thought I should recc some of my favorites:
Fraught with imagined dooms (G)
an actual relic (2006!) with such great dialogue. I’ve always wanted to make a comic inspired by it.
Serenade for Strings in E Major (G)
The author shouts me out lol but genuinely it’s so lovely. Tamaki gender exploration my beloved.
The Language of Flowers (T)
Tamaharu wedding antics with KyoKao messiness!! this fic is so fun!!
bee’s wing (T)
My heart, my shining light, my muse. My absolute favorite. Huge inspiration for when I started making tamaharu stuff. I wish I could have it as a physical book on my shelf.
Everything That You Are (M)
OH THE GENDER OF IT ALL
Friendship!!! Is Magic (T)
Yuri on Ice crossover that has no right to be so good. Tamaki being so excited to speak to Viktor in French, Haruhi androgyny, ice skating and jealousy… masterpiece.
…and some short ones:
Wonderful (T)
A Small Break (G)
Newlyweds (T)
of Tea and Eggs (G)
Also if you want to get KyoKao-pilled read 5 Years game
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