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sucked hearing you tell her that she your dream girl and that she cares more about you than i do, maybe i am some twisted bitch that will never be able to find love again, or even trust it.

you definitely fucked me up, and you’ll never understand it.

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don’t ask me why i won’t let you pay for anything for me, i’ve heard enough..

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“i still love you. you know that right? i always did, probably always will. lord knows i was never good at letting things - or people - go.”

-and other things i’ll never tell you. c.r.

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when your person can’t be that person anymore, sends knifes through your heart and now I’m just more alone

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being called stupid when youre already in a low point, hurts.

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ooof, that’s why I left that friendship it was trash along with you and a person, so keep speaking about me, cause quite frankly, youre just disgusting, and a wanna be cunt, too bad you can’t hurt me.

Wack ass bitch.

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I don’t hide behind my man, so really just shut the fuck up. Maybe idk, grow up?

You know who I am, so don’t act like you some boujie bitch.

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How am I suppose to be okay with this? How do I just push off that this girl is literally throwing herself at you, it’s hard this is hard.

I hate it. I hate these emotions. I hate these feeling.

It’s close to home, it’s close to everything that I literally swore I would never do to myself.

I’m back to being 17 at 24.

I’m suppose to be a wife but how does one be a wife when there’s a slut who doesn’t have any self control or respect for you as a female.

Can’t really speak about either cause I already said it was okay, which it is, I’ve been manipulated into thinking toxic things are okay. Goes back to home life..

it hurts, god it hurts. It’s making sick, I can’t even take care of myself cause I’m so consumed with all the “ what if’s” we use to be a what if too, and things like this never get explained right.

My heart is broken and I’m the only left to pick up the pieces.

Just thinking about someone else calling em names makes me sick, so how doesn’t it affect you that way? That what doesn’t make sense.

I feel like I’m just being dotted along till you realize that I’m no longer it..

tell me did 5 years just poof in front of your eyes?

Is all this worth me being destroyed inside?

I have so many questions that’ll I’ll never get an answer too..

I use it go through your phone till all it did was hurt me.. and you just don’t care.. why? What did I do to deserve that..

I want to turn off my emotions I want to go numb, I don’t want to think, I don’t want to care, I don’t want to feel this anymore, how do I shut it off?

How do I shut my issue off.

I just want things to be how they were 3 weeks ago but that’s gone, and I give up.

I’m not going to fight to be respected, I’m not going to keep doing this to myself..

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take as much as you need

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Milk and honey.

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I’ve got to be better, I’ve got to find my place. I’ve got to find the people that are my rocks even if that means I got to lose some.

I’ve got to be better, I’ve got to let go off all this hurt and built up hatred in my bones towards other as well as me.

I’ve got to be kinder to not only me but others, I’ve got to learn what it means to actually do the self care.

I’ve got to be better.

I won’t stop still I do, and I won’t let anything hold me back.

I’ve learn who I am, I’m not disposable I’m not someone that you can just decide when or when I’m not worth it.

This go for friendships or sexualships. I’ve got to better, I will be better.

I will.

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“Just don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.”

— Ella Jane Fitzgerald

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“The years between eighteen and twenty-eight are the hardest, psychologically. It’s then you realize this is make or break, you no longer have the excuse of youth, and it is time to become an adult.”

— Helen Mirren

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“You survived, you will survive.”

— Unknown

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“Maybe my passion is nothing special, but at least it’s mine.”

— Tove Jansson