mannagryn1

[mannagryn1]

[mannagryn1]

Hey, guys? Make peace with yellow teeth. I'm so serious right now.

[mannagryn1]

Today I was trying to chat up this girl standing with her friend at a lesbian bar and said “oh are you two together?” meaning were you friends before being next to each other at this bar and one turns to the other and goes with all the venom of a black mamba snake “I don’t know Cara, are we?” and I was like you know what? not my table

[mannagryn1]

it’s difficult to be a dom with anarchist leanings.

my sub will be like “i have to tell you something… i broke a rule. i’ll accept whatever punishment you see fit.” and i’m like. rise up comrade you have nothing to lose but your padded restraints. no doms no masters. oh you want me to spank you. yeah i can do that.

[mannagryn1]

man, undertale ran on a weird game engine

[mannagryn1]

[mannagryn1]

Hookup culture is so convoluted these days and I don't meant that in a way that is dismissive of the act in of itself but rather that you used to be able to just have a few drinks with a girl and then she'd put her eggs in you or vice versa nd then maybe you'd stack colored pebbles together for a few hours but nowadays she always has to try and poison your wine which I suppose I can't really complain about because I also try to poison hers while slipping antidote into mine but she does the same so we get mad at each other and grapple for a while and then she stings me with her stinger or injects venom into me with her fangs or what have you and THEN finally gets to the oviposition. It all just feels a bit overcomplicated to me and you can't even stack colored pebbles afterwards because you're still paralyzed from the venom

[mannagryn1]

my cat has not been enjoying the heatwave

[mannagryn1]

bad hedgehog

[mannagryn1]

Just had a fucking beautiful owl moment so good I nearly cried. Northern Pygmy Owl so close I could have reached out grabbed them and put them in my mouth for safe keeping

[mannagryn1]

Well, I have a dirty mind. 

[mannagryn1]

No more apologizing for being horny on main. No more horny jail. We’re horny prison abolitionists. No gods, no masters! Wait. Okay maybe a few masters. Alright but no bars will hold us! No whips and chains will — fuck, hang on, let me start again.

[mannagryn1]

Note the punctuation here.

Not WORLD’S edge. WORLDS’ edge - plural. I just find that interesting; it could be important. Perhaps “worlds’ edge” as in where the light meets the dark?

[mannagryn1]

which 3 US presidents do you think would be the best omegas and which 3 bisexual pop stars would be their best matched alphas

1) John Adams

John Adams was a tireless advocate for the revolution (i.e. topping from the bottom) and he once described himself as "obnoxious, suspected, and unpopular" - "he was known for his bluntness, impatience, and tendency to be easily frustrated with those who disagreed with him." As a brat in Congress, his personality was repulsive, but everyone listened to him and they all still wanted him. They wanted him so bad they made him president. Kind of makes you think.

His match:

Adams needs someone with a strong personality to challenge his - someone who's not afraid to repel the mainstream in order to realize their vision. Gaga has it, and he needs it. "Bad Romance" in many way encompasses Adams' struggles through the 1776 Continental Congress. They could teach each other much.

2) Theodore Roosevelt

A man dedicated to the preservation of natural parks and ecological wonders - and for what? To run through the trees under the full moon as his pheromones wafted through the air? We know.

His match:

Grimes once described herself as becoming "way less gay" after she became pregnant, which is 1) weird, and 2) the reason I'm sticking her with Teddy. I don't think that he could fix her completely, but she seems the type to maintain no moral compass of her own, simply adopting the political ideology of whomever she's with, so maybe there's hope. Maybe Grimes could introduce Teddy to shrooms, and Teddy could take her out on trips in the forest. And then we can find out if Grimes getting a man pregnant makes her more or less gay.

3) Richard Nixon

Best known for his one legendary debate with the handsome JFK, wherein he became a stuttering, sweating mess, unable to focus or say what he meant. Interesting!

His match:

Bisexual icon Taylor Swift is also struggling to appease both sides of the political aisle. They could share their woes and their love of good ol' fashioned Americana, and then Taylor could tie him to the wall and make him bark like a dog. The pregnancy would be difficult on both of them with Taylor's extremely busy schedule, and Nixon would regrettably terminate it in the second trimester, causing a rift in the relationship that would never be mended. The resulting laments that Taylor composed about Nixon's abortion would of course be dissected and attributed to a secret relationship with a woman - Nixon's wife.

I welcome critical analysis.

[mannagryn1]

Hooray! Yay! Dykes!

[mannagryn1]

i’m a gold star bisexual. i’ve fucked everybody