mapletreeonfire

[mapletreeonfire]

blows my mind that cheetahs are apex predators. that is the single most anxious creature I have ever seen. at any given moment a cheetah is exactly one stubbed paw away from bursting into tears. that is a sad dripping wet animal, and it's at the top of the local food chain? babygirl what happened

[mapletreeonfire]

[mapletreeonfire]

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

[mapletreeonfire]

12/8/22: decomposing vertebrae harboring algal growth.

[mapletreeonfire]

"everybody hates me" factoid actually just a statistical error. The average person doesn't hate you, especially not your friends. You, a person who sits in your room experiencing self loathing every day, are an outlier adn should not have been counted.

[mapletreeonfire]

it's very frustrating that when you do something mature---something that really demonstrates how much you've grown as a human being and adult---no full orchestra immediately appears in your kitchen to play verdi's triumphal march and/or an arrangement of tina turner's "the best" at top volume.

[mapletreeonfire]

the good life (post-war)

[mapletreeonfire]

there’s a website where you put in two musicians/artists and it makes a playlist that slowly transitions from one musician’s style of music to the other’s

it’s really fun

[mapletreeonfire]

While I do have some odd hobbies this recommendation is a bit much.

[mapletreeonfire]

[mapletreeonfire]

a heem heem………………………………sshasagjkrhf………… ouhg……..

[mapletreeonfire]

69 cities in the united kingdom and forty seven thousand pubs

[mapletreeonfire]

Obsessed with going "No... i shan't say..." when it's very clear what I shan't say

[mapletreeonfire]

Art challenge where you have to finish what you're making

[mapletreeonfire]

Lying to children is fun when they know you are being ridiculous. When you hold up a carrot like “guys look at this huge Cheeto” and they all scream “NOOOOOOOOO that’s a CARE-OTT!”

“What? No, it’s my giant Cheeto.”

“NOOOOOOO!”

[mapletreeonfire]

What if water didn't have surface tension and whenever you spilled some, the whole floor of your entire apartment was covered in a 2 micrometer deep puddle

[mapletreeonfire]