mattmercerbignaturals

[mattmercerbignaturals]

Happy birthday to Lyudmila Pavlichenko (born July 12, 1916), Soviet sniper in World War II, with 309 confirmed kills.

A true role model for today.

[mattmercerbignaturals]

[mattmercerbignaturals]

John Oliver gets it, as usual. AI Slop is one of the best episodes of Last Week Tonight I've seen so far. Gen AI is theft. Those who use it are not authors or artists, they're grifters profiting from real creatives.

[mattmercerbignaturals]

the thing about job searching is i see all these job postings and im like i dont wanna do any of this for any of you

[mattmercerbignaturals]

Just got really sad realizing that AI is going to ruin the art of horrendous American fireworks packaging

[mattmercerbignaturals]

I believe this whole heartedly with my full chest

[mattmercerbignaturals]

forcefem (dragons only choose female riders and the kingdom is rapidly running out of female conscripts)

[mattmercerbignaturals]

one time i hooked up with a guy and he ate my ass and jerked me off and then his boyfriend came home and was like kind of upset that he didn't get to have sex with me too. so i was like hey we can do sex that's fine by me. i can cum again. and so he's like ok lets take a shower together and ill jerk you off in the shower. and as hes jerking me off in the shower he asks if i use my phone while i shower. and i say no. and he says he always uses his phone in the shower. and sometimes he takes off the case and washes his phone with shampoo and water just for fun. and he's broken five phones this year from doing that but he's not going to stop because he just wants his phone to be clean and feel good. hes still jerking me off as he tells me about this. this is a real story you have to believe me

[mattmercerbignaturals]

Orgasm denial. Orgasm anger. Orgasm bargaining. Orgasm depression and orgasm acceptance.

[mattmercerbignaturals]

The two most culturally important things from the past few years are Friday by Rebecca Black because we learned we like hating things more than we like liking them and Cookie Clicker cause we figured out the only reason people play video games is to watch the numbers go up and since then we’ve just been applying those lessons to new and better incarnations of those two things.

[mattmercerbignaturals]

Thought this was a legit song title by the mountain goats until I looked at the thumbnail

[mattmercerbignaturals]

“If you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day; if you teach a man to fish, he will eat for a lifetime,” but you have done neither. You have stood before us and eaten fish after fish, and chided us for our greed as you have done so. You have cast aside their offal and simultaneously chided us for our waste. You then told us that, coincidentally, you owned the river, and our parents should have gotten us the same if we wanted fish. You gave a man a fish to murder us if we step too close to the river, or speak too loud, or eat a fish from another river. You’ve copyrighted the fishing net. It costs us fish to leave.

[mattmercerbignaturals]

The thing about Lovecraft's work is that he did write about some genuinely fucked up critters, but he doesn't seem to have had a clear picture of which ones those are. "Dog that inhabits right angles" and "sapient colour" are treated as exactly as mind-bending as, like, "guy who looks like a fish" and "big penguin".

[mattmercerbignaturals]

no for real like sit over there and drink your little beverage and stay tf out of the way let me cook

[mattmercerbignaturals]

“eldritch horror beyond your comprehension” and it’s just a generic monster with tentacles and eyes

[mattmercerbignaturals]

[mattmercerbignaturals]

it's always so funny to see a bug just fucking booking it across the floor. like girl where are you going. bug plans