mazovian

[mazovian]

Every time I think "Alright my savings are looking pretty good, i should be able to get a new car in maybe a month or two!" my current car decides to break in the most expensive way possible. It's like an abusive partner that threatens to kill themselves every time you try to break up with them.

[mazovian]

[mazovian]

Me: "If I was writing a sequel to the 2013 animated film "Turbo" I would include a cameo character for Eminem who is a snail named "Slime Shady""

My Guardian Angel: [smiles and adds another thread that connects me directly to god]

[mazovian]

hit some road debris on the way to work and now my front bumper is loose again fuck my stupid baka life

[mazovian]

Listen buddy, because of your little "what the derp" moment, Archduke Ferdinand is dead.

[mazovian]

Don’t worry, white male low info voter from Illinois, you will not be dying in WW3. You’ll actually be dying right now when i shoot you execution style for making violence in the middle east about yourself.

[mazovian]

horsey :)

[mazovian]

[mazovian]

[mazovian]

won gold medal for SITTING OUTSIDE IN THE SUMMER what have you losers done.

[mazovian]

what's even more weird is that the higher trim level (+$2k btw) fixes this issue in the strangest possible way

I <3 the new subaru impreza hatchback and it's far up on my lists of potential new cars but also. what the hell is this infotainment setup

genuinely who made the choice to have a weird unintuitive and dual display instead of a standard one. it looks like something straight out of the mid 2010s when they were still figuring out screens in cars.

[mazovian]

I <3 the new subaru impreza hatchback and it's far up on my lists of potential new cars but also. what the hell is this infotainment setup

genuinely who made the choice to have a weird unintuitive and dual display instead of a standard one. it looks like something straight out of the mid 2010s when they were still figuring out screens in cars.

[mazovian]

[mazovian]

So-called "free thinkers" when their friend has to pee

[mazovian]

[mazovian]

the funniest interaction I've had with steven universe remains that time I made the joke about how I'd kill myself if I were pearl, at which point my anons became a nearly perfect 50/50 split between pedantic explanations of why pearl can't commit suicide and lesbian cuckolds using my inbox as a confession box

[mazovian]

i love the 🚬 emoji whenever it's added to the end of a statement it has the same vibe as a child complaining about their homework and taking a long drag off of a candy cigarette