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[mellowhologramwinner-blog]

Daddy likes water a lot

Dec. 14 (I think) Winter is my favourite season. I think the reason I enjoy the wintertime so much is because everyone is super duper happy and even though it is SO cold I am happy. The people always brighten my day and sometimes I will go out from my living spot into the street just to look ant the people passing by and maybe make a friend but for some reason people don’t want to be friend with me and I don’t know why. Maybe because I am very little and have dirty hair.

Dec. 23 (2 days till x-mas) I’m starting to think people fear me or perhaps are scared to come near me. But its okay I will keep on trying to make new friends because I am lonely out here and what a better time to make a friend when everybody is in a jolly mood. A few weeks ago, I was around a different part of town and an old lady told me that Jesus loves me and that everything will be okay one day. She handed me a gift card to some restaurant I think… I’m not really sure but there was a picture of a chicken breast on it so I think that it s a chicken restaurant. I’m not really sure why she gave me the card because I don’t now how to use it but maybe that means she will be my friend. She didn’t seem to be scared of me. But in my opinion, I think the old lady thinks I am sad and lonely all the time but I am just super duper happy with my life right now because my daddy doesn’t know where I am and I think he likes it better that way too. I just wish I could make a good friend.

Dec. 25 (x-mas) Oh. My. Goodness. I can’t believe that it is x-mas! Some people that I see walking around the town call it krismas but I don’t know if I am spelling it right so I just like to call it x-mas because it is easier than krismiss. I do not know why this day is so special honestly but it must be pretty cool because the town was super busy last week with people scramming in and out of stores with giant bags and sparkly boxes that must cost a lot of money.  But today there are not many people walking around the town which is strange because it is x-mas today. Maybe people are tired from buying so much stuff they decided to have a long nap so they can have fun in the afternoon. One thing I do know is that on x-mas people like to eat lots of food with their families so I decided to try and use the card the old lady gave me to the place that had the same chicken logo but they were closed and I got sad because then id have to go back to me and my other peoples house to eat yucky food. But at least I get to eat. It just sucks that it is icky tasting.

Dec. 26 (the cool day after x-mas) I think that daddy is staring to look for me again and that is very scary. I do not want to see daddy so I hope my people who live at my house will hide me from them. I am scared of daddy and I was walking through the street and saw on the tv through the window screen that I was on the news labelled as “missing”. I think missing is a good thing because I don’t have to see daddy because he is mean. But on the good side at least today is the cool day after x-mas and I will probably see the nice old lady because she walks n the street every day and smiles at me. I think we are friends now and I hope I see her either today or tomorrow and maybe I can try talking to her.

Jan. 2 (I think) I SAW HER TODAY! It has been so long and I have not wanted to leave my living spot because I did not want daddy to find me but I just had to go down to the street and see her because she is so nice. It was too bad because the old lady did seem scared of me today and she even asked if I was the “missing girl” everybody was looking for and I said, “yes but please don’t tell because I don’t want my daddy to find me”. She then started to ask me a lot of questions and insisted on taking me to her house for some yummy food, a chat, and a place to sleep for a bit. So of course, I said yes because the winter is very cold and I don’t think I have seen my skin its normal colour it has only been red so maybe I will not be red when I go to her house. I am very happy because she is now my friend and she even invited me over to play. The old lady told me that her name was Emily, and I told her that my name was Max and that I was 6 years old. She then seemed even more scared for some reason maybe she ddnt like my name but then she said we had to go see the doctor as soon as possible. We are driving there now. We are now at the doctor and he put a stick with cotton on both ends into my mouth and wiped the inside of my cheek I don’t know why it was kind of weird but then Emily had to do it too and then we sat in the warm room afterwards which had a lot of fun toys until the doctor came back to us and said that tests would be back n a few days. Whatever that means.

Jan. 5 (the doctor called) The doctor called and when Emily picked up the phone she started to cry and then ran over to me and hugged me like I’ve never gotten a hug before. She said she was so happy to finally have found me and she said that she is my mommy. The mommy I never knew, I was so happy because now I know my mommy and she is not as mean as daddy. I asked her why daddy was so mean to me and why I never met her and she said that daddy drinks lots of water and gets very upset and mean to us. Mommy said she then was pregnant with a baby and daddy was not happy about that and he hurt her. That made me sad. When mommy had the baby, daddy was so mad at her that he said she needs to leave and never speak to her again. He kept the baby though. Mommy said the baby was me. And since daddy didn’t see mommy anymore because he is mad at her he decided to be mean to me instead. Mommy asked me why I was alone in the town for a lot of weeks and I said I ran away from daddy because he hurt me really bad. Mommy then took me to the doctor again to be healthy and fix my ankle which has been red and puffy for quite some time. I am feeling a lot better now and am eating good food. I am happy I do not need to see daddy anymore.

Jan. 21 Mommy has been in the court fighting for me for a long time now, I know she is with daddy because she tells me she is getting him in big trouble with the police because he was mean. Mommy got me a baby sitter and she is so nice. Her name is Hilary and she is 16 years old. When mommy is out getting daddy in trouble with the police me I am excited because Hilary will come over and colour with me and make food for me and talk to me. She says that I am an amazing kid and that I will grow up to do amazing things. I really hope so because daddy told me I would never do anything good but I believe Hilary more because she is nice and makes me happy. I think I have made a friend.

Feb. 11 Today mommy told me that daddy is now in big trouble with the police and that he will never be mean to me or her again. I am so happy and I love my life with mommy. Mommy hugs me and lets me watch tv and lets me eat cookies if I do my homework. Luckily for me, mommy is a teacher so she can teach me school stuff at home which is good because kids my age scare me because I think that they think I look weird. Hilary is still my best friend and her and mommy are the only 2 people I need because they are nice to me and make me very happy.

Sept. 6th, 2008 It is a few years since I wrote my last diary entry. I was gong through some drawers and found it again today. Today mom is enrolling me into a public school with some other kids. I’m pretty excited because ill get to meet new people and teachers and learn different things. I am in grade 7 now and I know it’s kinda late to go into school but its ok. I’ve been through a lot of scary stuff and this cant be too bad.

Sept. 15th, 2008 This has been incredible. I’ve made so many new friends and they all want to hang all the time. School so far is pretty easy too and I even got a perfect score on my math pop quiz. Maybe public school really isn’t too bad after all. Until next time diary…

Dec. 22, 2010 Today I started to date this amazing girl named Evangeline. She is so beautiful and I am so happy I get to call her mine. She has so many amazing ambitions and supports me in everything I do and calls me out on my shit when she has to haha. I am going to make her feel like the most beautiful girl in the world, she really deserves it. Mom really likes her too, I’m going to treat her the way my mother should have been treated.  Hope we are together for a long time.

March 13th, 2011 Today Evangeline and I are visiting my mom in the hospital. It’s a pretty short walk from my house so we can usually see her pretty often. Mom is sick, she is about 66 years old now and the doctors told me that she wouldn’t be around much longer.  Am absolutely crushed but at this point her cancer is rapidly spreading, so realistically I just need to be with her for her final moments. We talk about amazing things, she tells me that no matter what happens she will always love me and insists I continue to care for Evangeline and support and love each other.

March 14th, 2011 Mom passed away today. I am going to always carry with me her valuable lessons and her upmost affection towards me even when I was in my lowest points. She was the only lady that appealed to little kid me on the streets. Everyone else was so big and scary but she was so comforting and soft. She smelled like roses and seemed to have a glowing aura around her. She was my angel. I was homeless and it was hard. She gave me hope, she made me feel special and she didn’t even know who I was at the time. Maybe it was fate, but she defiantly changed my life for the better. I guess a mother’s love really is unconditional… The pain I am feeling is unbelievable and I don’t really feel like writing an entry. I’ll be back.

May 28th, 2012 Its been over a year since my last entry. Evangeline and I are still together and I am still upset over the loss of my incredible mother. Each day does not get easier but I am learning how to cope and life a happy life knowing she is still continually supporting me, right alongside me. Since my dad is still jailed Evangeline’s family so willingly let me live with them, and it has been amazing. I am doing well n school, I am in advanced programs and can only see a bright future ahead of me. I visit therapy and go to programs at the hospital to cope with my loss and bad physical tendencies. I am improving, life is getting better and I think I will grow up to do amazing things. Evangeline’s family is my family and I can see myself being with them forever. I love Evangeline and how much she supports me, maybe I will be okay soon. We shall see.