mercifulfckaroundandfindout

[mercifulfckaroundandfindout]

Don’t Read Pokemon Crossing

edit to add: Don’t read any work by Cherry_Bomb_Bees. tl;dr: I was driven to a suicide scare by them saying they lied, ghosted me when I expressed the suicidal scare. Pokemon Crossing is a good story. Fun dynamic between the characters and the battling is well done. However, the writer is a bad human being. I knew them personally for over a year.

We recently got into an argument about the nature of our friendship. I’m autistic, for context. Whenever we hung out we’d get pretty drunk. They would begin getting physically affectionate with me, and when we were sober enough, I’d ask about it and they said it was ok, and they’d let me know first thing if things weren’t right. We then got more physically affectionate and I got feelings. The argument we had was them saying they were lying when they said it was ok.

I understood that they were hurt but I also felt bad to myself. I was hurt by my actions, not the argument, and I expressed it to them. I was remorseful, and I felt enough pain toward myself for unintentionally hurting them to feel suicidal. They ghosted me when I expressed that remorse. That drove me to be actively suicidal, and I’m only alive now because of the intervention of other close friends.

What’s even worse about this situation: they had themselves expressed suicidal intentions due to their environment and I was there by their side. They got drunk at a convention and I was there by their side when they were asked to leave. They also expressed suicidal intentions when I told them why they were asked to leave. I was by their side then too. During one very drunken occasion of them feeling more inclined to kill themselves than usual, I was pretty weakly punched and told that I should kill myself for trying to hold them back from committing.

I’ve recovered enough since then to not feel suicidal. I find it difficult for me to be friends with them again even if they apologized. More importantly, they aren’t worth anyone’s clicks or likes or kudos on any platform, whether on AO3 or Depop or anywhere. Which is a real shame because, as I said, Pokemon Crossing is good. But the writer is a terrible person.